哀傷GRIEF

失落 Loss 階段 Stages

徵兆 Symptoms 療癒 Healing

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Life Stressors• Life StressorsTo learn the level of stress (distress) in your life, check in the empty box at the left of each of the following events if it has occurred within the past

12 months:• Event Value Event Value• Death of spouse 100 Son or daughter leaving home 29• Divorce 73 Trouble with in-laws 29• Marital separation 65 Outstanding personal achievement 28• Jail term 63 Spouse begins or ceases working 26• Death of close family member 63 Starting or finishing school 26• Personal injury or illness 53 Change in living conditions 25• Marriage 50 Revision of personal habits 24• Fired from job 47 Trouble with boss 23• Marital reconciliation 45 Change in work hours, conditions 20• Retirement 45 Change in residence 20• Change in family member’s health 44 Change in schools 20• Pregnancy 40 Change in recreational habits 19• Sexual difficulties 39 Change in church activities 19• Addition to family 39 Change in social activities 18• Business readjustment 39 Mortgage or loan under $10, 00017• Change in financial status 38 Change in sleeping habits 15• Death of close friend 37 Change in number of family gatherings 15• Career change 36 Change in eating habits 15• Change in number of marital arguments 35 Vacation 13• Mortgage or loan over $10,000 31 Christmas season 12• Foreclosure of mortage or loan 30 Minor violation of the law 11• Change in work responsibilities 29 • • Note: This scale is derived from the Holmes, T. & Rahe, R. (1967) "Holmes-Rahe Social Readjustment Rating Scale", Journal of Psychosomatic Research, 2.Please

note that since the development of the Life Events Scale, it has generally been recognized that there can be significant variation in the individual weight that each life event causes due to personal differences and the context of situations. Obviously the size of mortgages has also changed! However, this scale remains a good general estimate of personal stress.

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• 創 世 記 2:24

因 此 ， 人 要 離 開 父 母 ， 與 妻 子 連 合 ， 二 人 成 為 一 體 。

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哀傷的特點

• 是正常 , 不是軟弱• 是愛的代價• 是情感的經歷和路程• 是調整 , 帶來大改變• 需要努力 , 時間和精力去對付• 是個人性和獨特的

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失落

• 夢想• 盼望• 財務保障• 社交生活• 身份• 親情關係• 人生目標

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失落

• 將來• 朋友• 信心• 信仰

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• 你失去的不單只是你的摯愛You’ve lost more than your loved one

• 你失去的是超過於你想像的Your loss is deeper than you thought

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哀傷的階段Stages of Grief

• 1. 否認 Denial• 2. 忿怒 Anger• 3. 討價還價 Bargaining• 4. 沮喪 抑鬱 Depression• 5 接受 Acceptance

9以上取自 “ On Grief and Grieving” by Dr. Elisabeth Kubler-Ross

哀傷的徵兆Symptoms of Grief

• 1. 離棄 Abandonment• 2. 忿怒 Anger• 3. 迷亂 Confusion

(Disorientation)• 4. 消沉 Depression• 5. 絕望 Despair• 6. 恐懼 Fear• 7. 沮喪 Frustration• 8. 內疚 Guilt

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哀傷的徵兆Symptoms of Grief

• 9. 無助 Helplessness• 10. 孤單 Loneliness• 11. 後悔 Regret• 12. 愁煩 Sadness• 13. 震驚 Shock• 14. 失眠 Sleeplessness• 15. 哭泣 Weeping• 16. 怨恨 Bitterness

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如何關心哀傷的人

Caring for the Bereaved

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哀傷者的自助自立

Self Help for the Bereaved

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• 約 翰 福 音 11:35

耶 穌 哭 了 。

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My Grief Letter

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My Art Cards

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Lilian’s artcards and letters

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答“為何” 的問題

Answering the “WHY” Questions

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• 詩 篇 22:1 我 的 神 ， 我 的 神 ！ 為 甚 麼 離 棄 我 ？

為 甚 麼 遠 離 不 救 我 ？

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• 羅 馬 書 5:12

這 就 如 罪 是 從 一 人 入 了 世 界 ， 死 又 是 從 罪 來 的 ；

於 是 死 就 臨 到 眾 人 ， 因 為 眾 人 都 犯 了 罪 。

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• 羅 馬 書 6:23

因 為 罪 的 工 價 乃 是 死 ；

惟 有 神 的 恩 賜 ， 在 我 們 的 主 基 督 耶 穌 裡 ， 乃 是 永 生 。

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Moving On進展和成長

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喜樂與痛苦共存是哀傷療癒的特徵

Real Healing is characterized by the presence of Joy and Pain

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神是善良的神God is Good

神是掌權的神God is Sovereign

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神是愛God is Love

神愛你God loves you

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