19th JanuaryWriting skills

Steps to success:1. Understand how you are assessed2. Apply the mark scheme to a piece of writing3. Identify ways in which the writing can be improved

LO: Can I Improve a piece of writing?

Starter

What do you need to include to make your writing effective in the exam

LO: Can I Improve a piece of writing?

19th January

BykisaNahidaHoudaNazmin

RujinaYasminSharikaAniqa

AminaSajidaShunaraAkhiya

RagiaRubiaTanyaHanifa

SadiaFahmidaRemaTanzila

PunctuationNazminTanzilaSharikaShunaraRagia

VocabularyAniqaAkhiyaRubiaHoudaFahmida

ParagraphsSajidaBykisaRujinaTanyaRema

SentencesHanifaNahidaRujinaAnimaSadia

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2

Writing skills

In your groups you have sentences from the marking criteriawhich relate to grades D, C and B (vocabulary you also have A).

1. Can you work out as a group which sentence relates to whichgrade?

2. What are the important words in each sentence? Do you knowthe meaning of these words?

LO: Can I Improve a piece of writing?

Which type of words relate to:

LO: Can I Improve a piece of writing?

D grade C grade B grade

Write a letter to your local newspaper arguing for or against a recent proposal to build a Zoo in your local area.

I think it is a good idea to build a zoo in the area. I have lots of reasons why I think this. Building a zoo would help to make the area more popular tourists would come so businesses would get more money and local children would be able to go to the zoo to see all the animals. It might also be good for school children to see the animals. Some people might say that the zoo would smell but this is not really a big problem. Also some people might say that the zoo will cost a lot of money and it should be spent on something better but that’s ridiculous all the money will be earned back when people come to visit it and pay to get in. Lots of animals are dying out and zoos try to stop this by mating animals. A giant panda at London zoo just gave birth and this helps to make sure that people in the future can still learn about animals which are rare.In conclusion it would be good to have a zoo in the area and lots of people in the area would agree with me and it that it should be built.

LO: Can I Improve a piece of writing?

1. What grade would you give the answer based JUST on your topic?

2. Why does it not get the next grade up?

LO: Can I Improve a piece of writing?

Write a letter to your local newspaper arguing for or against a recent proposal to build a Zoo in your local area.

I think it is a good idea to build a zoo in the area. I have lots of reasons why I think this. Building a zoo would help to make the area more popular tourists would come so businesses would get more money and local children would be able to go to the zoo to see all the animals. It might also be good for school children to see the animals. Some people might say that the zoo would smell but this is not really a big problem. Also some people might say that the zoo will cost a lot of money and it should be spent on something better but that’s ridiculous all the money will be earned back when people come to visit it and pay to get in. Lots of animals are dying out and zoos try to stop this by mating animals. A giant panda at London zoo just gave birth and this helps to make sure that people in the future can still learn about animals which are rare.In conclusion it would be good to have a zoo in the area and lots of people in the area would agree with me and it that it should be built.

Vocabulary

1. What grade would you give the answer based JUST on your topic?

2. Why does it not get the next grade up?

3. Can you see words or phrases which you think could be improved?

4. What words or phrases would you use instead?

5. Why have you chosen these words?

What do you need to remember when thinking about what vocabularyto use?

LO: Can I Improve a piece of writing?

LO: Can I Improve a piece of writing?

Extensive vocabulary which anticipates and manipulates audience response

Some careful choice of vocabulary to show some awareness of the audience

Well chosen appropriate vocabulary which shows clear awareness of the audience

Variety of vocabulary is limited showing little awareness of the audience

Vocabulary

Vocabulary

1. What grade would you give the answer based JUST on your topic?

2. Why does it not get the next grade up?

3. Can you see words or phrases which you think could be improved? (highlight them)

4. What words or phrases would you use instead?

5. Why have you chosen these words?

What do you need to remember when thinking about what vocabularyto use?

Write a letter to your local newspaper arguing for or against a recent proposal to build a Zoo in your local area.

I think it is a good idea to build a zoo in the area. I have lots of reasons why I think this. Building a zoo would help to make the area more popular tourists would come so businesses would get more money and local children would be able to go to the zoo to see all the animals. It might also be good for school children to see the animals. Some people might say that the zoo would smell but this is not really a big problem. Also some people might say that the zoo will cost a lot of money and it should be spent on something better but that’s ridiculous all the money will be earned back when people come to visit it and pay to get in. Lots of animals are dying out and zoos try to stop this by mating animals. A giant panda at London zoo just gave birth and this helps to make sure that people in the future can still learn about animals which are rare.In conclusion it would be good to have a zoo in the area and lots of people in the area would agree with me and it that it should be built.

LO: Can I Improve a piece of writing?

Paragraphing

1. What grade would you give the answer based JUST on your topic?

2. Why does it not get the next grade up?

3. Can you decide on the topic for 3 paragraphs (not including introduction or conclusion)

4. What would you need to add to each paragraph?

5. Why would you need to add these things?

What do you need to remember about how to create effectiveParagraphs?

LO: Can I Improve a piece of writing?

LO: Can I Improve a piece of writing?

The writing contains a clear opening and closing

Effective paragraphing helps to develop the overall argument

Paragraphs are clear and used accurately to show opening, development and closing

Paragraphing

Write a letter to your local newspaper arguing for or against a recent proposal to build a Zoo in your local area.

I think it is a good idea to build a zoo in the area. I have lots of reasons why I think this. Building a zoo would help to make the area more popular tourists would come so businesses would get more money and local children would be able to go to the zoo to see all the animals. It might also be good for school children to see the animals. Some people might say that the zoo would smell but this is not really a big problem. Also some people might say that the zoo will cost a lot of money and it should be spent on something better but that’s ridiculous all the money will be earned back when people come to visit it and pay to get in. Lots of animals are dying out and zoos try to stop this by mating animals. A giant panda at London zoo just gave birth and this helps to make sure that people in the future can still learn about animals which are rare.In conclusion it would be good to have a zoo in the area and lots of people in the area would agree with me and it that it should be built.

Paragraphing

1. What grade would you give the answer based JUST on your topic?

2. Why does it not get the next grade up?

3. Can you decide on the topic for 3 paragraphs (not including introduction or conclusion) make a note.

4. What would you need to add to each paragraph?

5. Why would you need to add these things?

What do you need to remember about how to create effectiveParagraphs?

LO: Can I Improve a piece of writing?

Sentences

1. What grade would you give the answer based JUST on your topic?

2. Why does it not get the next grade up?

3. Can you see sentences which you think could be developed?

4. How would you develop these sentences?

5. How do these sentences improve the writing?

What do you need to remember about sentences when writing?

LO: Can I Improve a piece of writing?

LO: Can I Improve a piece of writing?

Some variation of sentence structure (including use of commas and connectives)

Sentence structure is limited – often relying on simple sentences (few commas or connectives)

Different types of sentences are used for effect

Sentences

Write a letter to your local newspaper arguing for or against a recent proposal to build a Zoo in your local area.

I think it is a good idea to build a zoo in the area. I have lots of reasons why I think this. Building a zoo would help to make the area more popular tourists would come so businesses would get more money and local children would be able to go to the zoo to see all the animals. It might also be good for school children to see the animals. Some people might say that the zoo would smell but this is not really a big problem. Also some people might say that the zoo will cost a lot of money and it should be spent on something better but that’s ridiculous all the money will be earned back when people come to visit it and pay to get in. Lots of animals are dying out and zoos try to stop this by mating animals. A giant panda at London zoo just gave birth and this helps to make sure that people in the future can still learn about animals which are rare.In conclusion it would be good to have a zoo in the area and lots of people in the area would agree with me and it that it should be built.

Sentences

1. What grade would you give the answer based JUST on your topic?

2. Why does it not get the next grade up?

3. Can you see sentences which you think could be developed? (highlight these)

4. How would you develop these sentences? (make some notes of ideas)

5. How do these sentences improve the writing?

What do you need to remember about sentences when writing?

LO: Can I Improve a piece of writing?

Punctuation

1. What grade would you give the answer based JUST on your topic?

2. Why does it not get the next grade up?

3. Can you any see any places where more punctuation could be used?

4. How does punctuation improve the writing?

What do you need to remember when thinking about what vocabularyto use?

LO: Can I Improve a piece of writing?

LO: Can I Improve a piece of writing?

Variety of punctuation used accurately

Limited punctuation within sentences

Variety of punctuation is used for effect

Punctuation

Write a letter to your local newspaper arguing for or against a recent proposal to build a Zoo in your local area.

I think it is a good idea to build a zoo in the area. I have lots of reasons why I think this. Building a zoo would help to make the area more popular tourists would come so businesses would get more money and local children would be able to go to the zoo to see all the animals. It might also be good for school children to see the animals. Some people might say that the zoo would smell but this is not really a big problem. Also some people might say that the zoo will cost a lot of money and it should be spent on something better but that’s ridiculous all the money will be earned back when people come to visit it and pay to get in. Lots of animals are dying out and zoos try to stop this by mating animals. A giant panda at London zoo just gave birth and this helps to make sure that people in the future can still learn about animals which are rare.In conclusion it would be good to have a zoo in the area and lots of people in the area would agree with me and it that it should be built.

Punctuation

1. What grade would you give the answer based JUST on your topic?

2. Why does it not get the next grade up?

3. Can you any see any places where more punctuation could be used? (mark this on the writing)

4. How does punctuation improve the writing?

What do you need to remember when thinking about whatvocabulary to use?

LO: Can I Improve a piece of writing?

LO: Can I Improve a piece of writing?

Move back to your usual groups and share what you have learnt

As a group make a list of points to remember at the top of your piece of sugar paper about: •Sentences•Vocabulary•Paragraphing•Punctuation

No more than one sentence on each!

LO: Can I Improve a piece of writing?

What do you need to include to make your writing effective in the exam?

Sentences should be…Vocabulary should be…Paragraphs should be…Punctuation should be…