7leadership mistakes - obi james€¦ · one of the most self-limiting beliefs that i come across...

Obi James | Seven Leadership Mistakes

LeadershipMistakesthat Stifle Your Team7

by Obi James


WHY CHANGE NOW?

Introduction


According to a 2013 study conducted by Dr Srini Pillay M.D, an Assistant Professor of Psychiatry at Harvard Medical School, about 50% of senior managers and C-suite executives thought the CEO of their organisation was burned out, while 75% said their senior managers were burned out.

To survive and thrive in today’s volatile, uncertain, complex, and ambiguous (VUCA), leaders and organisations must embrace a different type of leadership. Traditional, hero leadership models must be set aside, and leaders must proactively engage their people, share their leadership and ensure that all resources are maximised.

We don’t need leaders weighed down by the responsibility of leading from the front, losing themselves in work and suffering burnout. We need leaders who can unleash the creativity, innovation and wisdom of their people.

Having spent over 1000 hours coaching and developing leaders across various levels and industries, I have come across common leadership mistakes that lead to individuals and teams getting stifled, and to leaders experiencing stress and burnout.

Over time, I have identified, studied and developed solutions to help leaders embrace a different, inclusive, collaborative and empowering way of leadership.

In this e-book, I share seven of these mistakes and offer solutions which will get you started on the journey of experiencing and embracing leadership as a gift – for you and your people.

Introduction

Introduction

You are too powerful

#1MistakeLeadership


As a leader in today’s VUCA world, you most probably feel overwhelmed by the range of responsibilities you have and the pace at which you are expected to function.

Each stakeholder sees their needs as a priority and little consideration is given to the demands and pressures that come with your day-to-day people management and leadership responsibilities.

As the demand grows, your ability to juggle it all and deliver the quality of work that you expect of yourself suffers. This has a knock-on effect on your confidence; you struggle to focus, and you end up stressed.

A stressed leader has an impact on the atmosphere in their team. With prolonged stress, others become affected and the overall engagement and productivity of the entire team can suffer.

It doesn’t have to be that way. Fess up and ask for help.One of the most self-limiting beliefs that I come across in leaders is that asking for help somehow means admitting that one isn’t coping.

On the contrary, a leader who coats their struggles and always shows a brave face, can inadvertently present themselves as a superhero. The people marvel at how in control the leader is and start to question whether they themselves have what it takes to become a leader one day.

So, here’s a piece of advice for you:

“Be careful that you don’t cross the line between being powerful and being disempowering.”

Asking for help shows that you are human. Bringing that vulnerability into your leadership helps others connect to you, builds trust and feeds that “we’re in this together” feeling that is often found in high-performing teams.

It also means that your team members see you as fallible, look out for you more and feel empowered to point out when they see a blind spot and think you’re about to make a wrong move.

You really couldn’t go wrong with this one. Be human.

Leadership Mistake #1: You are too powerful

You lead from the front

#2MistakeLeadership


A common complaint from aspiring leaders is that their manager or team leader blocks their progression. Traditional leadership lessons taught us that the leader sets the vision, calls the shots and drives solutions.

Any leader that still adopts this command and control leadership style will tell you that they’re very stressed and overwhelmed. These leaders struggle to cope, let alone thrive in today’s demanding world.

When Sergio Marchionne, the CEO that led the transformation of Fiat Chrysler into an automotive giant recently died at 66, people questioned whether all his efforts were really worth the sacrifices. He was a known workaholic putting in 7 days a week and 52 weeks a year.

With the pressures of today’s VUCA world, you really must learn to step aside, make sure you’re taking care of yourself and be ready to lead from the front, side or back.

“Leadership is no longer just a role or function that you step into and stay in. It is also a hat that you can periodically take off and pass on to others, recognising that you can’t always have the answers and you’re not always the best suited to

drive efforts.”

In doing that, you provide stretch opportunities for your people to grow, give them the challenge that would engage them differently, maximise your team’s potential and create your team’s best possible solutions for your business.

Leadership Mistake #2: You lead from the front

You love rescuing others

#3MistakeLeadership


If you are unfamiliar with the concept of codependency, please check it out. I will not go into it here other than to say those that readily occupy ‘victim’ roles in the workplace often find themselves tangled with those who love rescuing.

One reason for stepping into the rescue (or other roles in unhealthy relationships) role often stems from our own childhood and life experiences which I’m not going to go into here.

Perhaps you happen to be someone who has ‘service’ as a strong value. You love helping others and get great satisfaction from being of service. This is not a bad thing except like most good things, too much starts to cause more harm than good.

If you love rescuing, you will probably relate to this: your team member presents a problem which he/she is struggling with. As they’re sharing this with you, you find yourself slipping into a different conversation (in your head, of course) exploring the ways you could easily solve the problem. You recall similar challenges you may have had in the past and you feel pleased that you can help. You can be that ‘knight in shining armor’ who comes to the rescue.

Stop it! If the rescuer role is one you often find yourself in, it is time to step back and reflect on what you get out of it. Where else does this need show up in your life and how does that disempower the people around you?

Frequently jumping in to solve problems not only stifles your team members creativity, it creates an unhealthy dependency on you, weighs you down and stops you from focusing on more strategic elements of your job as a leader.

You miss opportunities to help your team members grow and build confidence in their own ability to tackle challenges that come their way.

Consider this:

“Perhaps it’s your way of staying in your comfort zone, and is fed by a fear of stepping up to bigger challenges?”

Leadership Mistake #3: You love rescuing others

You don’t know your team

#4MistakeLeadership


A senior professional once shared that his wife was expecting their first baby and that meant it was time for him to move on from his job. He explained that he worked for a leader who didn’t appreciate the importance of family and of a work-life balance.

The team leader had young children but was known to work incredibly long hours. In fact, he’d often joked that he would much rather wait till bedtime to go home as the last thing he needed was to be on time for “the drama called bedtime”.

Even with the banter, the leader was inadvertently giving out the message that family wasn’t a priority for him. In his case, it’s possible that status was more of a motivator. He liked being a successful and busy banker, motivated by the pressures and status of the role.

What he hadn’t taken time to explore was his people’s individual motivators. He mistakenly assumed that they too cared mostly for status, the bonuses and the accompanying lifestyle.

In this case however, the professional valued his family time more. He loved the challenge from his job and felt it was a good job. It already allowed him to provide a comfortable life for his family and he had little interest in further accumulating wealth or building status.

The long hours that his role demanded were pulling him away from his family and the consequent stress was having an impact on his ability to fully engage at work and his productivity levels.

With the baby coming along, he felt that he couldn’t ask for flexibility and that if he did, he would be viewed differently by said leader. He was most probably wrong.

This is possibly another one of many cases where there is a strong mismatch between a leader’s intent and their impact.

As this leader hadn’t taken the time to have deeper conversations with his team members, understand their values, drivers and career goals, he inadvertently left room for people to develop views of him, mainly based on the behaviours they witnessed.

“Do not fall into the trap of assuming that your people are driven by the same motivators as you are. Get to know

them, share your own dreams and aspirations with them, and where you can, tailor their incentives and reward to

match who they are and what they stand for. This way, you will get the best out of them.”

Leadership Mistake #4: You don’t know your team

You focus on job titles

#5MistakeLeadership


I once conducted an exit interview for an organisation that was gutted about losing one of their top talents to a competitor. She spoke about feeling constrained by her previous job and the team that she was in. She had shared her frustrations and ambitions with her boss and had seen no real efforts to explore other possibilities for her - outside her role and the team.

She found a mentor from a business network, confided in him and started getting support from him. According to her, he took time to find out what her dreams were, worked with her on her 5-year vision and then challenged her to explore all possible paths to making her dream a reality.

Unfortunately, her experience of speaking to her manager led her to believe that there was no point further sharing her frustrations with him. Not only did her mentor help her come up with possibilities, he facilitated introductions to others in his network and consequently helped her land a new role; with a competitor organisation!

Annoyingly, there were similar opportunities within the organisation she was leaving and had they been aware of her needs and aspirations, they would have made every effort to retain her.

As a leader, dedicate time to having informal career development conversations with your people.

Forget the job titles and job descriptions, and focus on helping them create opportunities that would excite them, engage them differently and help them be their best possible selves - even if it means they must move from your team!

“A true leader can see the forest for the trees, recognise that every talented employee is an

asset to the entire organisation, and not let job expectations get in the way of getting the best

out of their people.”

Leadership Mistake #5: You focus on job titles

You encourage poor behaviour

#6MistakeLeadership


We all know that team member that dedicates a lot of time to working on being the ‘teacher’s pet’. They appoint themselves as spies and grass on others who may not be pulling their weight. Very often, they themselves are hardworking and productive members of the team, but lack in building string, trusting relationships with their colleagues.

As a leader, you value their input and the secrets they share, and without meaning to – reward and encourage toxic behaviours that impact their ability to build and develop strong relationships with their peers. You end up playing favouritism. This in turn, can alienate other team members, erode trust in the team as a whole and create a culture that certainly cannot nurture a high performing team.

In our team development programmes, one of the dimensions of our framework is Team Behaviours. We often find that constructive interaction and collaboration are areas that need attention in teams that score low on engagement.

“Leaders of high performing teams know the importance of staying neutral and not taking

sides. They recognise that their role as an inclusive leader is to ensure that every team

member feels valued and respected, and feels a sense of belonging in the team.”

Take some time to think about each one of your team members. Who do you give more attention to than others? How does that impact other team members and your team culture?

Do you help your team members to build strong relationships and work better together, or are you inadvertently nurturing some toxic behaviours that are alive in your team?

Leadership Mistake #6: You encourage poor b ehaviour

http://obijames.com/our-work/team-development/http://

You love solving problems

#7MistakeLeadership


Imagine an employee who joins an organisation excited about all the value they will bring and the impact they can have.

Now look at every single one of your team members and think about what previous experiences they had and what would’ve excited them about getting onboard. Ask them! And, if you were involved in hiring them, what had you excited about them joining your team?

Now consider how much of each individual’s experiences, skills and knowledge you tap into on a day-to-day basis. Better still, list every task you’re responsible for and consider which ones you could and should delegate.

Imagine you were to go on an impromptu 6-month break, how many of those tasks could you delegate to your team members? What’s really stopping you? You’re likely to find that you’re not maximising the potential and talent in your team.

One of the key areas that we find lacking when we assessed team’s productivity levels is that of maximising resources. We find teams complaining about lack of resources, only to come to the realisation that they have all they need in their team.

What they are lacking is dedicated time and space to step back, review their priorities and effectively allocate resources, regardless of job descriptions and expectations. (Can you tell I find job descriptions the most stifling of all talent?)

Are you one of those leaders who take on much more than they should, struggle to delegate effectively, feel overwhelmed and have team members who are not stretched enough?

A 360-feedback process with one such leader revealed that contrary to her assertion that she supported and protected her team, their view of her was that she did not trust them enough to delegate to them!

“Take some time to really reflect and ensure that you are not inadvertently stifling the wisdom, creativity and innovation that already lies in your team. If you are, that’s the problem

you should be solving!”

Leadership Mistake #7: You love solving prob lems


Having explored the seven mistakes described above, dedicate some time to self-reflection, commit to embracing collective leadership and ensure that you are creating an inclusive and empowering environment for your people. In doing so, leadership will become an even more inspiring and fulfilling part of your life.

If you would like to assess your team as a collective rather than assess the individuals within it, get in touch to schedule a complimentary assessment and consultation call with Obi:

Tel: +44 (0) 20 3290 7894Email: [email protected]: www.obijames.comLinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/obijamesuk

Conclusion

mailto: [email protected]

http://www.obijames.com

linkedin.com/in/obijamesuk

Obi James is the Founder of Obi James Consultancy Limited. As a Leadership Consultant and Group Facilitator, she has 15 years’ experience of successfully developing leaders and teams across large multinational organisations like the NHS, Deloitte, Bank of America, Morgan Stanley and Northern Trust. She helps organisations develop inclusive and collective leadership, to ensure workplaces in which every individual and team can thrive.

About the author

www.obijames.com

www.obijames.com

7leadership mistakes - obi james€¦ · one of the most self-limiting beliefs that i come across...

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