A. Acute Listenitis: (Also known as Knowitallism) A hearing ailment that prevents the patient from fully hearing the concerns of others, specifically those related to teaching with technology. Symptoms may include gadget obsession, bullying of the tech phobic and, in extreme cases, the tendency to place fingers in own ears while yelling “la la la la.”B. Technonesia: (From the Latin Network Interruptus) Achronic ailment that causes the patient to forget (either)temporarily or entirely that he/she is a certified teacherand not just a technician. Symptoms include the inability toprioritize, a lack of self confidence and very dry skin.C. Schedularea Nightmarus: (From the Latin chickenaceo sans noggin). A chronic ailment often brought on by environmental factors (such as being assigned tosupervise students in a fixed lab setting) and often results in the spontaneous shouting of “I can’t…” statements. Symptoms may include dry mouth, twitching and talking to oneself.

D. Failophobia: (Also known as Little Dictator Disorder). An ailment that prevents the patient from allowing students to control their own learning. Any changes to the prescribed lesson results in extreme agitation. Symptoms may include nail biting, fist clenching and gnashing of teeth.E. Copyrightum Fever: This neurological disorder causes the patient to believe that copyright laws simply do not apply to them. Symptoms may include file sharing, mild to severe clip art rashes and, in extreme cases, incarceration. F. DATAticulitus: An ailment in which the patient appears to be allergic to the use of data. This easily cured ailment is often exacerbated by the patient’s reliance on homeopathic remedies that focus on technology as a tool instead of seamless integration. Symptoms may include blurred vision, repeating oneself and the inability to hit simple targets.

G. Assumptivitus: (From the Latin Digitarus Nativitus) Patients with this ailment typically have unrealistic expectations of beginning

teachers regarding their ability to teach with technology. Symptoms may include frequent disappointment,

itchy eyes and the inability to match digital devices

with appropriate pedagogy. H. Collabophobia: A debilitating ailment in which the patient fears working with others and/or

taking on a leadership role when working with others. Symptoms may include sweaty palms, night terrors, decreased

effectiveness and eventual extinction.

I. Move Over Mania: (From the Latin Iwouldtellyoubut Thenidhavetokillyou). A common ailment that

causesthe patient to think he/she is the only one capable

of fixing technical problems. Symptoms includespontaneous shouting of the word “move!” and

swelling of the head. J. Block-it Fever: This ailment is categorized by the patient’s desire to block websites that tempt

students to “be off task.” In severe cases, patients believe the best way to teach students (and teachers)

how to make good digital choices is to give them no choices at all. Symptoms include extreme anxiety

and frequent twitching.

K. Curriculonesia: An ailment in which the patient seems to have no knowledge of the NC SCOS and/or

ITES. symptoms may include memory loss and rash decision making.

L. OTD: (Also known as Obsessive Technology Disorder or

Gadget Gravitas). A psychological ailment that causes

the patient to fixate on technology as the key to student

learning. Symptoms may include muscle

twitching, carpel tunnel and the inability to

focus on one thing at a time.