A Few Questions to Think About

•Have you ever felt out of control? Or known someone who was out of control?

•What does being out of control look like? How does it affect your relationships?

•Out of control = too little or too much control

Few Examples• Addictions

• Violent Action (Abuse or other)

• Illegal Activity

• Cheating

• Obesity

• Financial Ruin due to debt

• Out of control Spending

• Road Rage or rage in general

• Judgmental Attitudes

• The Overbearing Parent (i.e. Sports Dad)

Self-Control Defined

Self-Government under God’s Authority and Power

I Feel a Contradiction Coming On

“I thought God is supposed to be in control?”

Genesis 2:7-9

the LORD God formed the man from the dust of the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and the man became a living being.

Now the LORD God had planted a garden in the east, in Eden; and there he put the man he had formed. And the LORD God made all kinds of trees grow out of the ground – trees that were pleasing to the eye and good for food. In the middle of the garden were the tree of life and the tree of knowledge of good and evil.

Genesis 2:15-17

The LORD God took the man and put him in the Garden of Eden to work it and take care of it. And the LORD God commanded the man, “You are free to eat from any tree in the garden; but you must not eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, for when you eat of it you will surely die.”

What Are the Areas Under My Control?

The First Area of Control:Our Base Desires : The Lusts of the

Flesh

The Problem and the Solution

1 John 2:16-17

For everything in the world – the cravings of sinful man, the lust of his eyes and the boasting of what he has and does – comes not from the Father but from the world. The World and its desires pass away, but the man who does the will of the God lives forever.

The Consequences

Proverbs 5:22-23

The evil deeds of a wicked man ensnare him; the cords of his sin hold him fast.

He will die for lack of discipline, led astray by his own great folly.

The Second Area of Control:Our Emotions : Fire & Ice

Fire

Colossians 3:8

But now you must rid yourselves of all such things as these: anger, rage, malice, slander, and filthy language from your lips.

IceSimon & Garfunkel, I am a

rock

“I touch no one and no one touches me.

I am a rock

I am an island

And a rock feels no pain;

And an island never cries.”

The Consequences

Too much emotion consumes and destroys relationships like fire.

Too little emotion freezes and destroys relationships like ice.

Our Example: The Perfect Balance• John 11: 35 “Jesus Wept.”

• Luke 19:41 “As he approached Jerusalem and saw the city, he wept over it.”

• Luke 10:21 “At that time Jesus, full of joy through the Holy Spirit…”

Our Example: The Perfect Balance

John 2:14-15 “In the temple he found men selling cattle, sheep, and doves, and others sitting at tables exchanging money. So he made a whip out of cords, and drove all from the temple area, both sheep and cattle; he scattered the coins of the money changers and overturned their tables.”

The Third Area of Control:Our Dominion : Who’s the

Boss?

Some Specific Relationships:

Parents:

Col 3:21 “Fathers, do not embitter your children, or they will become discouraged.”

Employers

Col 4:1 “Masters, provide your slaves with what is right and fair, because you know that you also have a Master in heaven.”

Some Specific Relationships:

Elders:

1 Peter 5:2-3 “Be shepherds of God’s flock that is under your care, serving as overseers – not because you must, but because you are willing, as God wants you to be; not greedy for money, but eager to serve; not lording it over those entrusted to you, but being examples to the flock.”

The Consequences

Have you ever seen an abuse of power or a lack of control from someone in authority?

How has that affected relationships?

Our Example: The Perfect BalanceMatthew 4:1-11

Then Jesus was led by the Spirit into the desert to be tempted by the devil. After fasting forty days and forty nights, he was hungry. The tempter came to him and said, “If you are the Son of God, tell these stones to become bread.”

Jesus answered, “It is written: ‘Man does not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God.’”

Then the devil took him to the holy city and had him stand on the highest point of the temple. “If you are the Son of God,” he said, “throw yourself down. For it is written: ‘He will command his angels concerning you, and they will lift you up in their hands, so that you will not strike your foot against a stone.’”

Jesus answered him, “It is also written: ‘Do not put the Lord your God to the test.’”

Again, the devil took him to a very high mountain and showed him all the kingdoms of the world and their splendor. “All this I will give you,” he said, “if you will bow down and worship me.”

Jesus said to him, “Away from me, Satan! For it is written: ‘Worship the Lord your God, and serve Him only.’”

Then the devil left him, and angels came and attended him.

Our Imperfect Example: Paul1 Cor 9:19-23

Though I am free and belong to no man, I make myself a slave to everyone, to win as many as possible. To the Jews I became like a Jew, to win the Jews. To those under the law I became like one under the law (though I myself am not under the law), so as to win those under the law. To those not having the law I became like one not having the law (though I am not free from God’s law but am under Christ’s law), so as to win those not having the law. To the weak I became weak, to win the weak. I have become all things to all men so that by all possible means I might save some. I do all this for the sake of the gospel, that I may share in its blessings.

Final Warnings and Exhortation

Remember

Out of Control = Too little or Too much

control

The Mirror vs. The Magnifying Glass

The Mirror’s 2nd Use:

Reflecting God’s Glory

1) Keep the Mirror on the light (God)

2) Keep the Mirror clean and in good

repair; be self-controlled