Find Out

How Tony Robbins Got

His Teeths so Damn

White

Where Went All of the

Library Books of

Yesteryear?

How to Save the Almighty

Dollar

What’s this EZ-Borrow I

Hear so Little About?

How to Get PaperCut!

Featuring

Textbooks Are Evil 1

Tony Robbins on the

Drumpf Question

1

The Academic

Hardware Store

2

The Poetry Corner 2

Free Textbooks! 3

Sometimes Our

Printers Work

4

the newsletter with issues

Volume 12

Number 1

FALL2016

$5.00

GET THEE FROM HERE, SATAN Don’t worship the Almighty

Dollar. Save it! When those

textbook publishing infidels

come crusading for your

hard-earned cash, tell them:

“Get thee from here, Satan!

I’ll get my textbooks from the Library!

Yes, the Library will save my dough!”

Drumpf got you down? Ask Tony Robbins

*The Library sells Pop Tarts at the Library’s Point Break café.

**The Library’s Nap Room is on the lower level of the University Center.

***PointCat is the Library’s catalog where you can search for books, DVDs, and other things in the Library’s collection.

****If you’re looking for a book that is not in our collection, you can request it through EZBorrow, just click the link on

the Library homepage and log in with the barcode number on the back of your Point Park ID.

Tony Robbins Q: “What happened to all of the Library books?”

TR: Everything’s on the internet now — hahaha. Again, just kidding. You know I’m against

reading and smart people. Business would dry up. The Library’s collections have been

consolidated. The books are all on the lower level of the Library now and the fungals

have been removed to a greenhouse.

Q: “Hey Tony, how did you get your teeth so damned white?”

TR: I drank bleach once during one of my not-so-proud moments.

Library News A FineMoney Publication

Q: “Drumpf’s got me down. What can I do?”

TR: Have a PopTart* and cry yourself to sleep in the Library’s Nap

Room**— hahaha. Just kidding ... shameless Library promotions.

Just go to PointCat*** and check out one of my motivational books

from the Library. If they don’t have one, use EZBorrow****. Better

yet, buy my “Living Health” CD set for only $199.00 at

www.tonyrobbins.com. It’ll change your life.

Library News Page 2

“Can it trim these

hideous nails?”

The Newsletter w/Issues POETRY CORNER

Not, I'll not, carrion comfort, Google, not feast on thee; Not untwist — slack they may be — these last strands of man In me ór, most weary, cry I can’t know more. I can; Can something, do research — not choose not to use the Library.

But ah, but O mine professor, why wouldst thou give me a “C” My research red-penned mock? mark a grade against me? scan With darksome devouring eyes my dotcom quotes? and fan, O in turns of tempest, my paper there; me frantic to avoid thee and flee? Why? That my chaff might fly; my grain lie, sheer and clear. Nay in all that toil, since (seems) I’d writ my thesis to end all theses, My heart lo! lapped strength, stole joy, would laugh, chéer. Cheer whom though? the hero who used my work to clean up dog feces? Or me that fought him? O which one? is it each one? That night, that semester Of now done darkness I wretch lay wrestling with (Professor!) my Professor.

Carrion Comfort, Google

By Gerard “Lightnin’” Hopkins

THE ACADEMIC

HARDWARE STORE

Paper cutters! Citation generators! Search engines! Hardware, Software — everywhere!! Tape and Pencils! Printers, Scanners

– even Books and Staplers! You name it, we got it!

And if we ain’t got it! We might get it! And you don’t pay a thing!

Professor on the fritz? No problem!

Could be low quality sources. Bad sources will lead to poor performance that can

wear down even the best professors, and may even cause them to fail you.

But the Academic Hardware Store is here to help. Make sure your professor is getting their required

dose of high quality peer-review — the genuine article!

We'll help you find 'em! You just gotta install 'em!

“Industrial

strength, Boss.

Best darn paper

cutter money can

buy!”

Page 3 Volume , Issue

Find Free Textbooks Following These Two Simple Steps:

Look up your required books from the

bookstore and get the ISBN number.

STEP 1b.

THEN go to PointCat from the link on the Library’s homepage and search.

If the Library has your textbook,

proceed to STEP 1d. If not, go on

to STEP 2.

STEP 1d. Make copies of your readings

using the Library’s book scanner.

They’re free to use and create high

quality PDFs that you can email to

yourself or download to a USB.

An Advanced Search allows you to search by ISBN. ISBN numbers are

assigned to each edition of a book. If you can’t find your required

edition, ask your professor if an earlier edition of the book is adequate. *EZ-Borrow allows you

to request books and have

them shipped to Point Park

University Library from

other university libraries,

like Penn State, Temple,

Pitt, CMU, NYU, WVU,

IUP, Drexel, Penn, Rutgers,

etc, etc., etc, etc, etc, etc.

Pick up your book at Point Park’s Library when you receive email notification

that the book has arrived (generally, 3-5 days after you’ve made your

request).

HERE

NOT HERE

STEP 1

STEP 1c.

Go to *EZ-Borrow on the Library’s

homepage and log in with your Library

barcode number (it’s on the back of your

Point Park ID).

STEP 2

STEP 2b.

STEP 2c.

University Center

414 Wood Street

Pittsburgh, PA 15222

Phone: 412-392-3171

email: library@pointpark.edu

Po in t Park Un ive r s i t y L ib ra r y

We’re on the Web!

http://www.pointpark.edu/Academics/AcademicResources/Library

DON’T BE A L-USER.

SOMETIMES TECHNOLOGY WORKS

BE A LIBRARY U$ER.

Technology is great when it works! Life is one serene summer day! It’s all of humanity working together

to build a brighter future and all that happy digested and expelled horsedirt. Houyhnhnmdung? (… or

was it Yahoo?). But when it doesn’t work, it’s just space-taking junk, sitting and uselessly crushing all

human effort and every worthy aspiration. Clear evidence that the world is going to hell in a

handbasket. When a printer’s not working, don’t let the world go to hell in a handbasket, go to

print.pointpark.edu or just go back to copying everything out by hand.

But when it doesn’t, don’t get mad. Get PaperCut! Go to print.pointpark.edu. PaperCut will allow you

to send print jobs from any working computer (— including your very own personal laptop) to other

printers on campus that also may or may not be working! Just log in to PaperCut to see whether or not

it recognizes your Point Park email credentials!