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T H E S T A N D O U T I S S U E

afrique.co.uk Price: £2

March 2015

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Religion & relationships

Chantelle Brown-Young

Healthy eating

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39The perks and downfalls ofbeing a tall African woman

30Read a symbolic poem from one of our readers

What works for you? How can little changes to your diet improve your health?

Find out how the slightest difference in religion can affect a relationship

The inspirational journey of how the once bullied model rose to fame

Tall and beautiful

Your contributions

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Creating your own style

Plus size African fashion

Social media unplugged

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51Keep up with the latest afro-beat trends in your country in Africa

74Interchangeable fashion and beauty tips to enjoy throughout the year

The latest trends in the plus size traditional wear of African clothing

Learn about how to improve your social media presence and be more online savvy

The best ways to stand out and add a little personal touch to your closet

Afro-beatsmusic

Your wardrobeall year round

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Time to show your true patterns

Widespread Wrapper £98.99 Ankara U.K;Blouse £60 Ankara U.K

On all four advert pages

Gold and Black Heels £65.99 River Island; Gold Watch £160 H Samuel; Gold Necklace £53 Goldsmiths

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Time to show your true patterns

Right now is a great opportunity to show off your traditional wear. This summer circle

patterns in the material is a growing trend

Skater Traditional Dress £120.99 Tribal

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Ankara Skirt £45.00 Zagada; Roll Neck Sleeveless Crop Top £15 Boohoo.com

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Sleeveless Frill Top £45.00 Zagada; Ankara Circle Skirt £30 Tribal

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Social Media Unplugged

From student turned social presence guru and the owner of youngxgifted.com Danielle Tsiba-Membi takes you through an essential

guide to standing out online. Whether you are trying to edit what employers eYq�Úf\�o`]f�l`]q�lqh]�qgmj�fYe]�aflg�?gg_d]�gj�ljqaf_�lg�k]l�mh�qgmj�gof�

blog this guide is perfect for you

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You have to have the drive and determination to keep going with a project you start online or social media account you create, so that it is al-ways up to date. However make sure you update it with relevant things or things that express your personality. If the public can access your QSPƋMF �TP�DBO�FNQMPZFST��*G�ZPVşSF�TJUUJOH�UIFSF�thinking I am safe because my account is set to private, think again. Employers are wising up to this trick of the trade and asking candidates to BEE�UIFN�PO�'BDFCPPL��:FQ �UIBUşT�SJHIU�UIFZ�DBO�see everything!

You need to make sure that you stay true to yourself and what you believe JO��%POşU�QSFUFOE�UP�CF�TPNFUIJOH�ZPV�are not online. Try not to get wrapped VQ�JO�5XJUUFS�XBST�PS�PUIFS�DSB[Z�TUVƊ�online because it could hinder the brand you are selling, which is yourself. 6OGPSUVOBUFMZ�Ş5XJUUFSş�BOE�Ş'BDFCPPLş�can no longer be that place that gives you the opportunity to freely bag on celebrities. I think the world of social media will join me in a loud sigh of disappointment. *Sigh*

Try not to hide yourself away and be shy. The Internet is a great way to show peo-ple who you are. You can let out little bits of your personality at a time until you are SFBEZ�UP�FYQSFTT�UIF�USVF�ZPV �CVU�EPOşU�let this phase last too long. I was very shy because I did not want people to know about my idea to build a website online. I XPVMEOşU�TIBSF�UIF�QSPKFDUT�*�XBT�XPSLJOH�on or promote it, which hinders how far you can take your brand online.

Do you want to see how the professionals do it? Check our website at afrique.co.uk to see more...

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If you have more than one social media account make sure you are sending the same message on all of your social media platforms, so get rid of anything that does not portray you in a positive light. You might XBOU�UP�DPOTJEFS�UIBU�PME�Ş.Z4QBDFş�PS�Ş#FCPş�BDDPVOU�still lurking about on the Internet. Does your employ-er or audience really need to know about what you used to get up to back in the day? These old accounts UIBU�ZPV�EPOşU�VTF�BOZ�NPSF�TIPX�QFPQMF�UIF�PME�OB®WF�BOE�MFTT�NBUVSF�ZPV�BOE�OPU�UIF�DPOƋEFOU �empowering and focused person you have become. Consistency is key.

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Let people know about your projects in order to get people to help you complete them. If you are working on something you are really passionate about, you need to let people know to get it out there, besides you should be proud PG�UIF�XPSL�ZPVşSF�DSFBUJOH��*G�ZPV�EPOşU�TIBSF�ZPVS�TUVƊ�UIFO�EPOşU�DPNQMBJO�BCPVU�QFPQMF�not visiting your site. This goes for working on QSPGFTTJPOBM�QSPƋMFT�TVDI�BT�-JOLFE*O��:PV�OFWFS�know, your future employer may have the same interests as you. Sharing your projects gives PUIFS�QFPQMF�UIF�DIBODF�UP�IFMQ�ZPV�PS�ƋOE�ZPV�online. I got a lot of help and support for my website by promoting my work online.

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Use your other social network accounts to promote whatever project or brand you are XPSLJOH�PO��6TF�Ş'BDFCPPLş �Ş5XJUUFSş �Ş7JOFş�PS�Ş*OTUBHSBNş�CFDBVTF�UIFZ�BSF�BMM�SFBMMZ�BG-fective. Make sure the headlines for stories or posts that you publish have SEO in it, so that QFPQMF�DBO�FBTJMZ�ƋOE�ZPV�POMJOF��:PV�DPVME�BMTP�NBLF�TPNF�WJEFPT�PO�Ş:PV5VCFş�UP�QSP-mote yourself for projects. Some people make UIFJS�$7�JOUP�SFTVNFT�PO�:PV5VCF �TP�UIBU�employers can get a good feel of their per-TPOBMJUZ��*G�JUşT�EPOF�SJHIU�JU�DBO�CF�FƊFDUJWF �TP�IPME�PƊ�PO�UIF�DIFFTZ�BDUJOH��#Z�GPMMPXJOH�JOƌVFOUJBM�QFPQMF�PS�DPNQBOJFT�ZPV�DBO�QSP-mote yourself as being extremely knowledge-able about your chosen career path. It could also be a good chance to do some networking.

Deal with negative feedback in a calm NBOOFS��*UşT�IBSE�UP�EFBM�XJUI�TUFSF-otypes and this is particularly hard for African people as there are many stereotypes surrounding this culture. For every person complementing your work there is always someone criti-cising it, so be prepared. Arguing with them will only escalate the situation. I feel that at the end of the day I have worked hard for what I wanted, which made creating my website even more rewarding for me and this feeling should be the same for you. A lot of people in general do not make use of the opportunity to establish them-selves online because of these issues, which is something that angers me a MPU��%POşU�SFTQPOE�UP�UIF�DPNNFOUT�JG�ZPV�EPOşU�XBOU�UP�

When you are just starting out on your journey to use social media NPSF�FƍDJFOUMZ�ZPV�DBO�VTF�Ş#MPHHFSş�to begin with. It is great for creating a site to share your opinions and inter-ests on. Eventually if you feel like it is time to move on to something more professional then you should try Ş8PSE1SFTTş��:PV�DBO�BMTP�EP�NVDI�NPSF�XJUI�Ş8PSE1SFTTş�BT�PQQPTFE�UP�Ş#MPHHFSş �CVU�UIF�MBUUFS�JT�FBTJFS�UP�use. If you want to promote yourself GPS�B�KPC�UIFO�-JOLFE*O�JT�EFƋOJUFMZ�HPPE��*OTUFBE�PG�ƋOEJOH�FNQMPZFST�JU�HJWFT�FNQMPZFST�UIF�DIBODF�UP�ƋOE�you. How great is that!

Tips for LinkedIn

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Get the photo rightMake sure you use a professional photo like a photo of you in action doing your job. You could also use your generic passport style photo, but try to use the former, as it is more professional.

Get the information rightAdd relevant links to the experience TFDUJPO�PG�ZPVS�QSPƋMF��8IZ�OPU�TIPX�prospective employers what you can do instead of just telling them.

Get the discussions rightJoin discussions that relate to your inter-ests and career. Show your employer that ZPV�IBWF�TPNF�LOPXMFEHF�JO�ZPVS�ƋFME�

Get the links right%POşU�MJOL�XJUI�UPP�NBOZ�GBNJMZ�NFN-bers or friends that are not in your rel-FWBOU�ƋFME��5IFJS�BDUJWJUZ�DPVME�NFTT�VQ�the work you did to look professional.

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Danielle’sinspiration

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CHANTELLE

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The Rule Breaker

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Ex America’s Next Top Model

contestant Chantelle Brown-Young tells

Abigail Fajobi about her skin condition and her journey to

SFEFƋOF�UIF�XPSME�PG�modelling,

(wow this woman EFƋOJUFMZ�DBO�

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odels- widely being considered as some of the most beautiful people in the world; the last thing you would expect to hear is that they were once bullied because of their looks.

5IBUşT�XIZ�XIFO�*�XBT�JOJUJBMMZ�UPME�BCPVU�$IBOUFMMF�#SPXO�:PVOH �BLB�8JOOJF�)BSMPX�I was puzzled. She dropped out of high school because of the extent of the bullying she received due to her skin disease vitiligo, which causes your skin pigment cells to die. This 20-year-old stood up to her bullies in the most iconic way ever when she joined UIF�"NFSJDBşT�/FYU�5PQ�.PEFM�DPNQFUJUJPO�last year at the age of 19. She was hailed as an inspiration to women everywhere before she was eliminated from the competition BGUFS�NBLJOH�JU�UP�UIF�ƋOBM�TJY��5IF�NPEFM�has since moved on to do bigger and better UIJOHT �BT�TIF�CFDBNF�QBSU�PG�%JFTFMşT�Spring/Summer 2015 campaign. Last year she became the new face of Desigual. She braved the controversial world of fashion and came out on top, ohh and by the way became a massive female role model. Did I forget to mention that?

“The way that we think of beauty comes GSPN�EJƊFSFOU�UIJOHT�MJLF�TPDJBM�NFEJB�BOE�the internet and especially magazines. I NFBO�DPNF�PO�UIBUşT�DPNJOH�GSPN�B�NPE-el” says the easygoing Chantelle.

š*�GFFM�UIBU�UIPTF�UIJOHT�JT�XIBU�EFƋOFT�beauty today, but personally I feel that beauty is in everything and some people may say that big feet are not cute but there are gonna be a pair of shoes that are gonna look better on my size nine feet than a size six foot.”

During her presentation of her story at UIF�Ş5&%Y5FFOş�UBML�MPPLJOH�B�MJUUMF�TIBLZ�and nervous she asked the audience what UIFZ�ƋOE�UIF�NPTU�BUUSBDUJWF�JO�B�QFSTPO

8IFO�TIF�EFTDSJCFE�IFS�EFƋOJUJPO�PG�beauty she complimented members of the audience by praising the things she liked the NPTU�BCPVU�UIFN��*UşT�OPU�FWFSZEBZ�UIBU�ZPV�get a compliment from a model.

“The reason why I think there is beauty in everything is because when I was young I used to get picked on for something that today I think is amazing.

“One thing about me connects millions of people around the world and that is something that you can probably see is my skin condition.

“I was singled out because of this skin condition and I was bullied and alienated even by people who did not mean to.”

+VEHF�BOE�IPTU�PG�"NFSJDBşT�/FYU�5PQ�.PEFM�5ZSB�#BOLT�GPVOE�$IBOUFMMF�PO�Ş*OTUBHSBNş�UIFO�HPU�IFS�UP�BVEJUJPO�GPS�UIF�show and has now been added to the mod-FMT�HSPXJOH�MPOH�MJTU�PG�GSJFOET��:FQ�UIBUşT�right she was scouted for the show.

M

One thing about me connects millions of people around the world and that is something that you

can probably see is my skin condition

I feel that beauty is in everything and some peo-ple may say that big feet are not cute, but there are gonna be a pair of shoes that are gonna look

better on my size nine feet than a size six foot

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yra told Winnie on the show “this time has come BOE�JU�TIPVMEOşU�IBWF�DPNF�and you are too beautiful. You have something beau-tiful and you have a unique

skin that the public love.”This led to an emotional goodbye as fans

waved goodbye to the rule-breaking model on the show wondering if they would see more of her.

“Like everyone does my family and me would take family pictures and my mum would bring a little tub of her make-up and my mum is not the same skin tone as me.

“She is much darker than I am, so can you imagine me having a dark pasted face, while the rest of me is a light brown and white” she laughed.

“I obviously did not feel comfortable, but my mum was trying to make me feel comfortable.”

The powerhouse that is Chantelle switched schools when she was in the third grade, which is the equivalent to year four in England.

š*U�XBT�EJƍDVMU �CVU�MVDLJMZ�*�GPVOE�UXP�girls who were willing to play with me, but UIFZ�EJEOşU�SFBMMZ�LOPX�NF �TP�UIFZ�KVTU�wanted to check me out and see if I was one of the “cool kids”. She said cool kids with air

quotes, while rolling her eyes. Okay lets just brush aside the fact that

you revolutionized the world of modeling and got people to rethink the meaning of beauty… seems pretty cool to me. All in a days work I guess.

With over 22.6k followers on Twitter I think that most of the world would be more than willing to be able to stand in the same room as her let alone hang out with her or even better have the luxury to visit one of her photo-shoots. Hint. Hint.

“After a few weeks of being in that school and having those friends all of a sudden I did not have them and I was kind of con-fused as to why I was struggling to make GSJFOET �CFDBVTF�*�ƋOBMMZ�EJE�BOE�UIFO�*�XBT�like where did they go.

“They would avoid me at recess and at MVODI�BOE�UIFO�POF�EBZ�*�ƋOBMMZ�XFOU�VQ�UP�UIFN�BOE�XBT�MJLF�HVZT�XIBUşT�HPJOH�PO �8IZ�BSFOşU�ZPV�UBMLJOH�UP�NF�BOZNPSF

š5IFZ�TBJE�TPSSZ �CVU�XF�DBOşU�UBML�UP�ZPV�anymore because our parents said we might catch your skin condition.

Shame on those parents!“Can you imagine how that made me feel

in grade three, that hurt, I was alienated and embarrassed to be honest as I did not know what my skin condition was back then.

T

They said sorry, but we can’t talk to you any-more because our parents said we might catch

your skin condition

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was not asked if I wanted this skin condition and I did not ask for it.” she said with a shaky voice. When Chantelle got a little bit older she decided that she “did not want to be in

that low position anymore” as a result of being bullied.She looked down and said, “so what did I EP�*�CFDBNF�UIF�CVMMZ��*�EJEOşU�XBOU�UP�CF�bullied anymore so I joined the people who were bullying people”. I guess we can close our eyes and forget about mistakes made in year four.“I came to the realisation that I was trying UP�ƋU�JOUP�B�NPVME�UIBU�EJEOşU�ƋU�BOE�XIPTF�UP�EFDJEF�UIBU�*�IBWF�UP�ƋU�JOUP�B�NPVME�BOZXBZ�CFDBVTF�*�DBO�NBLF�NZ�PXOŧTP�*�ƋU�myself a new mould.” Remember this loyal readers this is a lesson for life.

“This sounds so cliché, but there is beauty JO�FWFSZUIJOHŧBOE�ZPV�EPOşU�IBWF�UP�ƋU�JOUP�TPNFPOF�FMTFşT�NPVME��:PV�KVTU�IBWF�to know for yourself and in your heart what beauty is.”I could not have said it better myself. Chantelle is not going to stop at Diesel she has big dreams to some day end up on the GSPOU�DPWFS�PG�7PVHF��"T�TIF�QPJOUFE�PVU�JO�BO�JOUFSWJFX�PO�UIF�Ş35-�-BUF�/JHIUş�TIPX�JO�UIF�/FEFSMBOEşT �TIF�EPFT�OPU�DBSF�BCPVU�XIBU�DPVOUSZ�7PVHF�JU�JT�BT�MPOH�BT�JU�JT�PO�the front cover. Talk about inspirational! At the age of 20 she is already earning more [FSPşT�BU�UIF�FOE�PG�IFS�QBZDIFDL�UIBO�NPTU�people her age. )FSFşT�B�UJQ�GPS�ZPV�8JOOJF�LFFQ�B�DPQZ�PG�your bank statement on you at all times and have it ready for anyone who dares try to bully you because of your skin.

I

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For display purposes only. This is not my own work.

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DANCETO THE

BEAT

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OF YOUROWN STYLE

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Sleeveless Frill Top £45.00 Zagada; Ankara Circle Skirt £30 Tribal

On this and previous pageFloral Co-ords £45.00 missguided.co.uk

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Tired of wearing the same white top and light blue jeans as everyone else? Thinking about stepping out of the norm and reinventing yourself? Fashionista

Ashley Ebuka has the advice you need to create your very own style

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How do you create your own style?

I started out by watching bloggers, fashion designers and going to fash-ion shows over the past few years. I used research as my base and then incorporated my personality and how I feel each day to build on my base. Some days I feel really girly, so I dress up in more girly clothes, but there are other times when I just want to dress up in all black. My friends joke around and tell me I look gothic, but I still look and feel like me. If your ward-SPCF�EPFTOşU�NBLF�TFOTF�UP�ZPV�UIFO�JU�XPOşU�NBLF�TFOTF�UP�BOZPOF�FMTF��

What are your wardrobeessentials?

I really love shoes. At the moment I have 200 pairs of shoes, well I say shoes, but I mean heels. I love heels because I am a short woman who is ƋWF�GPPU�GPVS �TP�*�OFFE�UIBU�MJUUMF�CJU�of a lift, but during the winter it has UP�CF�KFBOT��5IF�POF�JUFN�*�DBOşU�MJWF�without would have to be my black chunky heel sandals from Primark. They are really old now, as I have had them for two to three years, but everyone always asks me where I got them from. They are just comfortable and you can wear them all the time.

Sleeveless Frill Top £45.00 Zagada; Ankara Circle Skirt £30 Tribal

On this and previous pageWhite Lace Dress £50 ASOS

Sleeveless Frill Top £45.00 Zagadnkara Circle Skirt £30 Tribal

White Bralet £20.00Top Shop; Yellow Trousers £28 River Island

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How can you make your own personal TUZMF�SFƌFDU�ZPVS�OBUJPOBMJUZ

You can always pick and choose items of clothing to represent your own nation-BMJUZ��:PVS�FOUJSF�PVUƋU�EPFT�OPU�OFFE�UP�TDSFBN�"GSJDB�PS�UIF�$BSJCCFBO��*�EP�ƋOE�that sometimes shops sell t-shirts and PUIFS�JUFNT�GPS�EJƊFSFOU�DPVOUSJFT�PS�ZPV�DPVME�HFU�BO�PVUƋU�DVTUPN�NBEF�PS�get creative and DIY by watching videos on YouTube. You could always just pick out the colors of your country and JODPSQPSBUF�UIFN�JOUP�ZPVS�PVUƋU��*G�JU�JT�not summer or spring it can be hard to QVMM�PƊ�PVUƋUT�XJUI�MPVE�QSJOUT �XIJDI�JT�what traditional clothing is.

%P�ZPV�IBWF�BOZ�UJQT�GPS�QFPQMF�USZJOH�to make their own style?

Follow your own personality and do not copy what you see because every-CPEZ�ESFTTFT�EJƊFSFOUMZ��&WFO�UIPVHI�B�QFSTPO�NBZ�CF�XFBSJOH�BO�PVUƋU�UIBU�is exactly the same as yours, there is always something they have styled in a EJƊFSFOU�XBZ��*�EPOşU�LOPX�BOZPOF�XIP�has exactly the same personality and interests as someone else. If you want

to get into fashion create your own platform that you can share your ideas PO �TP�ZPV�DBO�TFF�XIJDI�PVUƋUT�XPSL�best and get the most reception. Just do it and have fun. However remember that no one can tell you if you are right PS�XSPOH��&YDFQU�UIF�GBDU�UIBU�ZPV�DBOşU�QMFBTF�FWFSZPOF��*G�UIBUşT�ZPVS�TUZMF�UIFO�UIBUşT�ZPVS�TUZMF� 8IBU�JT�GBTIJPO�UP�ZPV

Remember that fashion is a way for people to express themselves and be VOJRVF��8IFO�ZPV�HP�PVU�ZPV�EPOşU�IBWF�to have a conversation with some-one before they make an assumption about you. What they see is what you are wearing. It is a way of expressing yourself before people even get to know you. Your clothes speak for you. Every year fashion changes, so the trends do not stay around for too long. You have to stay on the ball to keep up with the trends. Check out trends from London or Africa fashion week. There is a thin line between copying and getting inspi-SBUJPO�GPS�JEFBT �TP�CF�DBSFGVM��/PX�ZPVS�well on your way to making that step to the new you.

£45.00 Zagada; Ankara Circle Skirt £30 TribalLight Blue Summer Blazer £30 Jane Norman; Blue Midi-dress £25 Next

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Self-image by Jennifer Bello

Poems by our readers

Ever since I was young and I learnt that there was a thing called perfection, being the per-fect daughter, the perfect sister, the perfect GSJFOE �UIF�QFSGFDU�MPWFS�BMM�*şWF�CFFO�EPJOH�JT�

trying to be it.I�USJFE�NZ�IBSEFTU�UP�ƋMM�VQ�BMM�UIFTF�QPTJ-

tions, to be the best that I can but I failed to ƋOE�IBQQJOFTT�JO�UIFTF�DBVTFT��

I am dependent on the love of others, as I have convinced myself that a girl like me is

worth nothing. A girl like me, what does that mean, what

does it mean to be a girl like me, once upon a time, a girl like me was worthless, a sponge

created for the sole purpose of absorbing pain, a vessel abused and used by whomever, eyes creeping all over my body, hands slowly

reaching up my legs, an empty worthless vessel I was, used and abused but I did not

cry, not even once. I went from one person to another seeking OPUIJOH�CVU�MPWF�BOE�ƋOEJOH�OPUIJOH�CVU�

pain. My heart weeps, tears of doubt, tears of

fears, tears of emptiness and tears of loneli-OFTT �DBTU�PƊ�JOUP�B�IFMM�DBMMFE�MJGF �CVU�MJWJOH�

is something I have failed to do.TIF�QBJO�EFFQFOT��/PU�GSPN�PUIFS�QFPQMFşT�actions, but from the memories that hunt me in my place of sleep, by the faces that

attack me in the darkness of my eyes. Once upon a time I convinced myself that I

was worthless, a nobody until somebody said I am otherwise, so I sought and I found, so

I do not cry, I do not make a sound, I smiled and I feared.

So what am I now, she described me as a lioness, a strong woman, a great friend, she described me as she sees me. I see the real

me, I see my mistakes. He looks at me like nothing happened, like *şN�BO�BOHFM �QVSF�JO�NZ�UIPVHIUT�BOE�NZ�

ways, I see myself through his eyes, I hear his promises through his words, I feel his love in the comfort of his embrace, his voice musi-cally soothes my soul, my friend, my father,

my lover, my everything.So the answer to that question, who am I, I BN�B�ƋHIUFS �OPU�B�DSJFS �B�WJDUPS�OPU�B�WJDUJN �

a persister and not a failure, my symbol of hope, faith, trust and miracles, a friend to

somebody, a daughter to my mother, a sister to my siblings and much, much more to

(PE����TP�*�DIBMMFOHF�ZPV��8IP�BSF�ZPV �/PU�the things that people say you are.

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For display purposes only. This is not my own work.

zenjewellery.co.uk

Reinvent Yourself.

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Reinvent Yourself.

HOUSE OF FRASERSINCE 1849

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Religion and Relationships

ƋSTU�NFU�.ZB�JO�NZ�ƋSTU�year of 6th Form. A mutual friend at school introduced us. We kept on seeing each other on the bus and almost simultaneously

XF�CPUI�BTLFE�FBDI�PUIFS�šZPVşSF�UIBU�HJSM�from before right?” This was followed by a break out in hysterics. Everyday we met FBDI�PUIFS�PO�UIF�-POEPO�CVT�ƋWF�UP�HFU�UP�6th form, but we kept on forgetting each PUIFST�OBNF�BOE�HPU�BXBZ�XJUI�ŞIJ�ZPVş�for about a week before the jig was up. We started chatting and I will never forget this; we exchanged numbers and I saved her name as Mia instead of Mya. The look on IFS�GBDF��š*UşT�OPU�.JB�JUşT�.ZB�Ţ�5IJT�XBT�FJ-ther the beginning of a beautiful friendship or warning signs to run away...friendship it is, was and always will be. Mya sees me as an overly devoted Pente-costal, but I see myself as more of a moder-ate one. Mya on the other hand is a devout

Catholic. Although my father is a Pastor it never got in the way of our fun. As time XFOU�PO�TIF�XBT�DPOƋEFOU�FOPVHI�UP�TIBSF�personal information with me despite my religious background. Even though I am not the party girl type and Mya is, we both shared our love of old movies (well old for VT �DPODFSUT�BOE�XFJSE�TUVƊ�JO�HFOFSBM��8F�CPUI�ƋOE�TUVƊ�UIBU�JT�OPU�NFBOU�UP�CF�funny seriously funny. For example during a cinema screening of Hunger Games 2 we both belted out with laughter when Peter suddenly showed interest in a family he hardly mentioned. There were times when our religions made us think twice about TIBSJOH�TPNF�TUVƊ�XJUI�FBDI�PUIFS�PS�inviting each other to personal events. Mya was initially worried about coming over to my house because my dad is a Pentecostal QBTUPS��/PXBEBZT�UIF�EJƊFSFODF�BOE�MFWFM�PG�EFWPUJPO�JO�SFMJHJPO�UIBU�VTFE�UP�BƊFDU�VT�IBT�SFDFOUMZ�BƊFDUFE�.ZBşT�SFMBUJPOTIJQ�with her boyfriend.

I

Oal`�l`]�jak]�af�[gfÛa[l�Z]lo]]f�\a^^]j]fl�j]da_agfk�Abigail Fajobi talks to her best friend Mya Waluka about how it has affected her relationships

Besties, Mya Waluka (left) and Abigail Fajobi

AFRIQUE 35

Do you see yourself as a devout Catholic?

I do consider myself a devout Catholic. I think about God everyday, I carry my rosaries. In fact I made sure I collected it and put it in my pocket today. I take my religion very seriously. One story that I am particularly fond of is the story about the woman with a haemorrhage in the bible. 4IF�CFMJFWFE�UIBU�KVTU�CZ�UPVDIJOH�+FTVTşT�cloak she would be healed and she was. Jesus turned around and told the woman that your faith has healed you. I feel that you can get God to answer you by faith alone and this is something that I have ex-perienced as a Catholic. I touch my rosaries in the same way she touched +FTVTşT�cloak.

Okay so do you think that you EPOşU�need to pray as long as you touch your rosaries?

*UşT�B�CJU�PG�CPUI�SFBMMZ��*�UPVDI�NZ�SPTBSJFT �while I am praying. If I have a big problem that I need a lot of help with I always pray while holding my rosaries because I feel more connected to God, but touching my rosaries is something that I do every day.

So what is your view on the Pentecostal religion?

I thought that certain people in those churches were lying when they said they could speak in tongue in order to make money. I have seen this happen before on many occasions.

Okay I can understand that. The few churches that do that have made a bad OBNF�GPS�VT��%JE�UIF�EJƊFSFODF�JO�CPUI�SFMJHJPOT�BƊFDU�ZPVS�SFMBUJPOTIJQ�XJUI�ZPVS�friends or boyfriend in the past? I know that he is Pentecostal as well.

Yes, with boys mainly. I went to a catholic school and the girlfriends I made there turned out to be the worst friends I had ever had. You would think that going to a catholic school would mean that your friends are all nice, but it was the com-plete opposite.

So what about the boyfriend?

My boyfriend started acting unnatural. He XBTOşU�SFBMMZ�being himself as I felt that he changed after he switched to the Pentecostal faith. It changed some parts of him for the good, but some parts were bad. Where did the funny him go? I feel like he was using God as an excuse like ohh *�DBOşU�EP�UIJT�PS�I will be severely

SFCVLFE�BOE�JUşT�KVTU�MJLF�KVTU�TUPQŧXF�BSF�just cuddling. He came over to visit and we kissed and the next day he was like what we did was bad and a sin.

What religion was he in the past?

He was a Muslim before. The funny thing is that I actually wanted him to become a Christian. I mean I liked his personal-ity when he was a Muslim and I like his $ISJTUJBO�WBMVFT�BT�B�$ISJTUJBO��*�KVTU�EPOşU�like his personality since he has become a Christian because he constantly makes me feel guilty about things I should not feel guilty about.

36 AFRIQUE

Do you ever feel kind of coerced into being a part of his religion?

Yeah. In the beginning he would try to convert me. He would start mentioning bad things about the catholic religion without truly understanding the religion. *UşT�MJLF�XIFSF�BSF�ZPV�HFUUJOH�ZPVS�JOGPS-mation from? He was trying to say that UIF�DBUIPMJD�SFMJHJPO�EPFTOşU�UFBDI�XIBU�JU�says in the bible when I know that it does. 5IF�QBTUPSşT�XJGF�PG�IJT�DIVSDI�DBMMFE�NF�just to check up on me, which was really awkward for me. She said to me that she would like to meet my mum one-day and I told my sister about it and she started laughing because she knows that my mum JT�B�TUSPOH�DBUIPMJD�BOE�TIF�XPOşU�TUBSU�going to that church.

So would you say that for a relationship to work a man and a woman should be from the same religion?

I think that it somewhat helps. Al-though me and this boyfriend of mine have the same religion we belong to EJƊFSFOU�EFOPNJOBUJPOT�BOE�XPS-TIJQ�EJƊFSFOUMZ��*�UIJOL�UIBU�JG�UIF�two people in the relationship have enough love for each other and they CPUI�SFTQFDU�FBDI�PUIFSşT�SFMJHJPO�UIFO�*�EFƋOJUFMZ�UIJOL�UIBU�JU�DPVME�work. When I started going out with my boyfriend he was a Muslim, so JU�DBO�EFƋOJUFMZ�CF�EPOF�BMUIPVHI�GPS�NF�personally I would like to have the oppor-tunity to pray with my husband.

How did you become a Catholic?

*�XBT�PƍDJBMMZ�CBQUJTFE�BU�UIF�BHF�PG�TJY �but I was already attending a catholic church and the atmosphere was very nice. When I started to hear about other churches it seemed alien to me. I was not keen on it. My family helped me stick with my religion, as even when we did not go to church we would all say Ş5IF�3PTBSZ�PG�0VS�'BUIFSş�UPHFUIFS��

Why is your religion important to you?

8FMM�JUşT�CFDBVTF�*�XBOU�UP�HP�UP�IFBWFO�and not hell. I feel like without religion everyone is free to act recklessly. Religion in a sense puts certain rules in place that ZPV�DBOşU�CSFBL�MJLF�LJMMJOH�QFPQMF��*G�POF�PG�the Ten Commandments was not enforced in the bible then I believe that there would be a lot more crime.

Okay…then what is your opinion for the reason behind the existence of extremist HSPVQT�TVDI�BT�"M�2BFEB�BOE�#PLP�)BSFN�who are fuelled by religion?

The people who are using religion as an excuse to kill people have just taken a CJCMJDBM�UFYU�TVDI�BT�UIF�#JCMF�PS�2VSBO�BOE�interpreted it in a way that suits them. In my expert opinion there views are stupid.

AFRIQUE 37

Did you ever not talk to me about private JTTVFT�EVF�UP�UIF�EJƊFSFODF�JO�PVS�SFMJHJPO�and our level of commitment?

Yeah. I had some negative views on the Pentecostal religion because of experienc-es I had in the past. I generally kept my views on people who practiced the religion a secret from you. I was not quite sure about what your religion was and when I found out that you were a Pentecostal I was like let me just keep my opinion to myself.

What is your opinion on atheist people because the bible teaches you to surround yourself with like-minded people?

My friend Delilah is Atheist and I never felt uncomfortable talking to her and she never tried to disrespect or disprove my religion. She is a cool person.

What about sex before marriage?

I think that a girl knows when she is ready PS�OPU��*�BN�OPU�KVEHJOH�QFPQMF �CVU�*�EPOşU�believe in sex before marriage because I think it is better to wait.

#VU�UIF�CJCMF�UFBDIFT�VT�OPU�UP�IBWF�TFY�until you are married?

*UşT�OPU�SJHIU�UP�KVEHF�QFPQMF�GPS�JU��"U�UIF�end of the day Jesus saved Mary Magda-MFOF�JO�UIF�#JCMF��

Then what should couples do in a relation-ship?

*�UIJOL�LJTTJOH�BOE�IVHHJOH�JT�ƋOF �CVU�many Christians see that as a grey area BOE�UIBUşT�XIBU�NZ�CPZGSJFOE�XBT�UBMLJOH�about. I think that it is okay if you know it is not going to go anywhere. If you know in your mind that you are feeling lustful then it is pointless to continue.

"OE�ƋOBMMZ�IPX�BSF�ZPV�BOE�UIF�CPZGSJFOE�now?

We are still together, but we did break up at one point. He has learnt to respect my religion and me more and visa versa. He has realised that we both come as a pack-age and respecting each others religion is something we will continue to do in the future. At the end of the day I will always have you to help me out.

Looool….I will always have your back.

For more discussions on religion check out our twitter page @afriquereligion

38 AFRIQUE

For display purposes only. This is not my own work.

AFRIQUE 39

A

TALL HEIGHT VS. RELATIONSHIPS

Surprisingly when I was in my 5ft 10”stage I was usually surrounded by guys who were the same height or shorter than me, but I as I progressed on to 6th form it seemed like all the guys around me had suddenly experienced a growth spurt. They had clearly been eating efo and QPVOEFE�ZBNŧZPV�LOPX�CPEZCVJMEJOH�/JHFSJBO�food. Ever since then I have never dated some-one who was shorter than me. That is just the XBZ�JU�IBQQFOFE�BOE�*�EPOşU�SFBMMZ�LOPX�IPX�*�feel about dating a guy who is shorter than me. I think it would depend on just how short he is.

s people get up in the morning they general-ly do the average yawn and stretch their arms from side to side. I have a whole routine,

which I do every morning before my body clenches up. Once I reached 5ft 11inches I just refused to measure my-self and just like that I reached the tow-ering height of 6ft. On my weekly trips to the supermarket I often got asked CZ�PME�MBEJFT�UP�HSBC�TPNFUIJOH�PƊ�UIF�UPQ�TIFMG�PS�ƋOE�NZTFMG�NBOPFVWSJOH�myself around little kids who seem to be popping out of nowhere. However I have learnt to embrace the height.

The general daily struggles of being a tall African woman

TALL HEIGHT VS. SCHOOL

School photos were the worst.I would be separated from my friends and put at the very back of the photo. On one occasion the photographer thought I was a boy, which is understandable I guess after all how could a girl be at the back of the photo, which is a spot that is generally reserved for the UBMMFTU�CPZT��*�EPOşU�LOPX�XIZ �CVU�tall people always end up making short friends. I would always end up standing out from the crowd as I walked with my friends.

TALL HEIGHT VS. COMMENTS

*�IBWF�IFBSE�JU�BMM�CFGPSF��(SFFO�HJBOU�PS�FWFO�IFZ�IPXşT�UIF�XFBUIFS�VQ�UIFSF �Seriously some people these days are lacking originality. After my school days these DPNNFOUT�EJFE�EPXO �CVU�*�TUJMM�HFU�UIF�PƊFOTJWF�VODMF�UISPXJOH�JO�B�QVODI�PS�UXP��"T�time goes on you learn to either ignore or embrace the comments and eventually orig-JOBM�DPNFCBDLT�XJMM�ƌPX�PVU�PG�ZPV�BT�UIFZ�EJE�GPS�NF��*�IBWF�SFDFOUMZ�USJFE�NZ�IBOE�at plus size modelling where my height is embraced. Eventually I found my place and IBWF�MFBSOU�UP�CF�DPNGPSUBCMF�XJUI�JU �CVU�CFJOH�BO�BNBUFVS�NPEFM�EFƋOJUFMZ�IFMQT�

TALL HEIGHT VS. CLOTHES

I have lost count of the amount of times I have walked into a retail shop and seen the pair of jeans I like or dress I really like, but end up sadly having to wave goodbye to it as I try it on in the changing room and it looks too short on me. When I was younger I tried to leave the house wearing a skater dress with no leggings and the look that my dad gave me! There was no need for words to be exchanged I just bowed my head and slowly made my way back to my room. An extra layer is all well and good for the winter, but the extra clothes in the summer or on IPMJEBZ�JO�/JHFSJB�SFBMMZ�EPFT�BDDVNVMBUF�UIF�IFBU��-FUşT�KVTU�TBZ�*�OFWFS�MFGU�UIF�IPVTF�without deodorant.

Living a life of tall brilliance at a height of 6ft Abigail Fajobi tells you about the everyday problems of a tall woman