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BanishYourInnerCritic(excerpt) TableofContentsDeniseJacobs
BanishYourInnerCritic(excerpt) TableofContentsDeniseJacobs
Introduction 3AreYouDoingYourBestWork?...................................................................................................................3TriumphingOverMyOwnInnerCritic......................................................................................................4It’sTimeforYoutoTriumphToo.................................................................................................................7
Why Banish the Inner Critic? 9OurIntrinsicCreativity.....................................................................................................................................9YourBrainonCreativity..........................................................................................................................11Creativity,Interrupted.............................................................................................................................12
MeettheInnerCritic.......................................................................................................................................13Creativityvs.TheInnerCritic.....................................................................................................................14ReclaimingCreativity......................................................................................................................................15
BanishYourInnerCritic(excerpt) Introduction
Copyright©2017byDeniseJacobs.Allrightsreserved. 3
Introduction
Are You Doing Your Best Work? You’refeelingthepressuretoperform:you’reonatightdeadline,andthereisalotridingonyourabilitytocomeupwithsomethinggreat. But,tryasyoumight…nothing.Youcan’tthink,youcan’tproblem-solve.You’reuninspired.Generatingneworinterestingideas?Youwish!Why?
Becauseyou
• shootdownyourideasbeforetheyevenhaveachance
• callyourselfafailurebecauseothersaroundyouaresucceeding
• discountyourideasbecausetheyaren’t100percentoriginal
• tellyourselfthatyou’rejustnotcreativeatall • haveahardtimevaluingwhatyoucreate
• can’timaginecreatingwithoutanguishandeffort,soyoumakeittrue…
Unsurprisingly,you,myfriend,arecompletelycreativelyblocked.
Andthen,whenyoutuneintoyourinternalself-talk,youfindasteadytorrentofself-chastisement,internalinsults,andput-downs:
• “Whycan’tyoucomeupwithanything?!”
• “Wow–soyou’vegotamaster’sinmarketingandthisisallyou’vegot?!”
• “You’reanidiot!Think,forchrissakes!”Yikes!
Yourcreativeparalysisisallthemorefrustratingbecauseyou’vebeenontheotherside.You’vehadmomentswhenyoudancedattheintersectionofyourskills,interests,naturalabilities,andaptitudes.Youwereexcited,completelyengaged,andseemedtobeanendlessfountofideasandsolutions.Youfeltcompletelyknowledgeable,powerful,andcompetent.Whateveritwasthatyouweredoing,youtotallynailedit.Theexperiencewasfantastic.
Formanyofus,creatingisatorturedprocess.Thetorture,however,isnotinherentincreatingitself,butinsteadcomesfromthefearswehavearoundourabilitytocreate.TheconstellationofourfearsmanifestsastheInnerCritic.Thispsychologicalconstructcantrickusintobelievingtheveryworstaboutourselves
BanishYourInnerCritic(excerpt) Introduction
Copyright©2017byDeniseJacobs.Allrightsreserved. 4
andourabilitytocreateordoanythingelseofvalueintheworld.Itblockstheamazingideaswehaveinsidefromcomingout.TheInnerCritickeepsusfromaccessingandexpressingtheverythingwedesire:theflowofourcreativity.
Basedonseveralyearsofresearchonthecreativeprocess,articleswrittenandpresentationsdevelopedanddeliveredaroundtheworld,surveyfeedback,coachingclients,andmostimportantly,talkingwithconferenceandworkshopattendeesandothercreativesofallsortsinmultipleindustries,IknowthattheInnerCriticisthelargestblocktocreativitythatexists.
Tocreate,weneedtoacknowledgetheInnerCriticandthedamageitdoestoourworklife,personallife,andgeneralwell-being. Tocreatelastingchange,however,wereallyneedtolearnhowtobreakitspoweroverussowecanregainourcapacitytocreate. IwrotethisbookbecauseIwantyoutobeabletoworkbetter,producemore,andcreatewithahigherlevelofexcellencethanyoualreadydo.ByidentifyinganddisempoweringthevariousformsoftheInnerCriticthatplagueus,wecanremovethebarricadesstandingbetweenusandourfullcreativeexpression.Thisbookwillhelpyoudojustthat.
However,IalsowrotethisbookbecauseIfeelyourpain.Iknowthetopographyofself-criticismpersonally:IhavestruggledwithaparticularlymeanandrelentlessInnerCriticthathasmadememiserableatformostofmylife.BecauseofmyownInnerCritic,Ihavetraveledfarandwideinthelandsofself-judgmentandself-doubt,dismissingthecreativitythatIdidhave,believingthatmyworkwasn’tgoodenough,andbeingsofocusedonwhatothersweredoingthatIcouldn’tseemyownstrengthsorprogress.
ImaginebeingabletocreatewithouttheinternalmentalfrictionoftheInnerCritic.Doesn’tthatsoundwonderful?It’snotjustapipedream–itcanbedone.IknowbecauseI’veexperienceditmyself.
Yousee,notonlydoIwritethisbookfromthestandpointofsomeonewhowasunsurethatshewastrulycreative;IalsowriteitfromthestandpointofsomeonewhohasfinallysilencedherInnerCritic,whoembracesandownshercreativity,andwhonowfeelsunstoppable.
Triumphing Over My Own Inner Critic Therearethosewho,byeithergoodfortuneorhardwork,arenotafflictedbyself-doubtanddon’tseemtohavemuchofanInnerCriticatall.Andthentherearetherestofus:wewhostruggledailytomaintainamodicumofself-assuranceaswegothroughourworkandpersonallivesbecauseofthebarrageofself-criticalinnerdialoguethatisourconstantcompanion.
BanishYourInnerCritic(excerpt) Introduction
Copyright©2017byDeniseJacobs.Allrightsreserved. 5
Iusedtobeinthislattergroup–untilIhadanexperiencethatchangedmylife.Letmetellyouwhathappened. WhenIwrotemyfirstbook,TheCSSDetectiveGuide,theexperiencedidnotstartoutallsunshineandSantaClaus.Ilandedabookcontractfromaserendipitousmeetingatatechconferenceparty,andIwasthrilledtobeontracktoachievingmytwobiglifegoals:
1) Becominganauthor,and2) Usingmyexpertstatustobecomeaspeaker.
Therewasonlyoneproblem:Iwasterrified.
Thefirsttwodaysofmyunrealisticallyaggressiveschedule(fourandahalfmonthstowritea250-pagetechbook)foundmesobbingonmycouch.Andletmebeclearaboutthis:Iwasn’tsnifflingquietlyanddabbingatmyeyeswithatissue.Ohno.Iblubberedwhilesittingonthesideofmycouch,asmytearsflowedontotheplushsagegreenfabricofthepillowIclutchedtomychest.Myfearsofnotknowingenough,lookingstupid,beingjudged,beingafakeandafraud,andnotbeinggoodenoughallplaguedmetothepointofnear-paralysis.Finally,onthethirddayIbuckedup,putonmybig-girlpants,andfinallysatdowntotheveryhardworkof…researching.Youknow,theincrediblyadvancedandrigoroustaskoflookinguparticlesontheweb,readingthem,andthenearmarkingrelevantinformationtoputinmybook.Yes,it’strue:IhadworkedmyselfupintoanemotionalfrothoversomethingthatIcouldpracticallydoinmysleep.Asafriendofminewouldsay:Crazypants!
Duringthenexteightmonthsofwritingmybook(becausedoingitinfourandahalfmonthswascompletelyuntenable),Icameupagainstthatinnercriticalvoicethattriedtoblockmyideasandcreativelyparalyzemealmostdaily.Thisvoicetoldmeeverydaythat
• myideaswerestupid
• eventhoughIhadtaughtthissubjectforfiveyearsatacollegelevel,thatIwasn’tenoughofanexpertonit
• mywebdesignswereamateurandsimplistic
• peoplewouldjudgemenegativelyandcriticizemybookfornotbeingin-depth,complete,oradvancedenough
That’sright:everyday. ThewayIoftendescribetheexperienceisthatinsteadofexercisingcreativity,Ipracticeditseviltwin:destructivity.Witheveryfearfulthoughtofnotbeingexpertenough,notknowingenough,wonderingifmywritingwasanygood,anddoubtingmyabilitytodesignwebsites,Itoremyselfdown.Totrytobuildmyselfup,eachdayIhadtofocusonwhatwasdirectlyinfrontofmeanddomybesttoignoremyanxietiesaboutmyperceiveddeficiencies.Buttheywerestillthere.
BanishYourInnerCritic(excerpt) Introduction
Copyright©2017byDeniseJacobs.Allrightsreserved. 6
Sometimeinthefourthmonthofwriting,I’dhadenough.Ineededtofigureouthowtoturnoff(oratleastmanage)thisunendingparadeofself-criticalthoughts.Ididalittlebitofresearchonself-criticismandfoundoutaboutthisthingcalledtheInnerCritic.AlthoughIdidn’tknowit,somethingclickedinsideofme,becauseafewdayslater,anideaforapresentationcametomeintheshower.Stilldrippingwetandwrappedinatowel,Igrabbedpencilandpapertojotdownfourpagesofnotes.Afewweekslater,Iwasawakenedat5a.m.byanideaforacreativity-bustingworkshop.Somethingbigwasbrewinginmysubconscious.
However,whileIwasdesigningthewebsiteforTheCSSDetectiveGuide,Ihadatrulymagicalexperiencethatchangedeverything. Tohavemybook’swebsiteupbeforeIspokeonapanelatthemajortechconferenceSouthBySouthwest(SXSW)Interactiveattheendoftheweek,IsatdowntocreatemywebsitemockupinPhotoshopfromasketchsoIcouldcodeitmoreeasily.Muchtomysurprise,myquicksit-downconsumedme,somuchsothatIwasanhourandahalflategoingtoafriend’shousefordinner.Throughthewholeevening,Ilongedtoreturntomydesigning,sowhenIgothomeat12:30a.m.,Ithought“I’lljustdoalittlebitandthengotobed.”1a.m.,then2a.m.,andthen3a.m.rolledby,andIjustcouldn’tstop.Withmyfavoritejazzplayinginthebackground,IwasinthehighofcreativeflowasIexperimentedwithcolor,typography,andlayout.Itwassheerbliss.Finally,at5:30a.m.,stillfiredupaboutdesigning,IstoppedbecauseIknewthatifIdidn’t,Iwouldsurelygetamigrainethenextday.Buzzingfromthecreativejuicescoursingthroughme,Ididmybesttogotosleep. Wakingupagainameretwohourslater,Iwaseagertogetbacktomycreation.Mywholebodyeffervescedwithenergy.Infact,Iwasbeyondblissful:Iwaseuphoric.Ifeltacontinuousrushofexcitementandpowersimilartothatofbeinginlove.IfeltlikeIcoulddoanythingIputmymindto.Ifeltliketheultimateversionofmyself:Ifeltthefullpowerofmycreativepotential. OnlyinretrospectdidIunderstandwhythiswassuchanincrediblypowerfulpeakexperience:itwasthefirsttimeinsolong(maybeever?)thatIhadexperiencedcreatingwithnointernalself-criticalcommentary:Nothoughtsof,“Isthisanygood?”orquestioningmyabilities.Nocomparingmydesigntothoseofotherpeople.Noworryingaboutwhatotherpeoplewouldthinkorsayaboutit.Forthefirsttimeineightmonths,Iexperiencedcriticism-freecreating.
ThatdayImadetwomonumentalrealizations:
First,thattheabsenceofmyInnerCriticallowedmycreativitytoflow!Becauseitwasquiet,therewasspaceformycreativityandideastocomeouttoplay.
Second,thatcreativityispower,andit’sasourceofpowerthateachandeveryoneofushas.
Unfortunately,mostofusrarelytapintoourcreativepower.Why?ForthesamereasonIsatonmycouchandcriedfortwodaysinsteadofstartingtowritemybook.
BanishYourInnerCritic(excerpt) Introduction
Copyright©2017byDeniseJacobs.Allrightsreserved. 7
Becauseofthelitanyofself-criticalthoughtsandtheself-doubtthattheygenerate.BecauseoftheInnerCritic. Immediatelyfollowingthoserealizations,Ihadanevendeeperepiphany:helpingotherpeoplereachthefeelingofbeingenergizedandcompletelyalivebyallowingtheircreativitytoflowwaswhatIwantedtodowithmylife.Why?Becausewhenweremovetheblocks,wecanaccessthissourceofpersonalpower.Andwhenwelearntoremovetheblockstomoreregularlyaccessandchannelourcreativepower,wecantransformourlivesandthelivesofothers–andchangetheworldforthebetter.
Ibecameobsessed:Ithrewmyselfintolearningaboutthecreativeprocess,specificallyhowtoremovecreativeblocks.NomatterwhichapproachIstudied,whetheritwasbasedonpsychology,neuroscience,productivity,orpracticality,theyallledbacktothesameplace:theInnerCritic.
Completingmyfirstbookdidindeedbecomethespringboardforbecomingaspeakerinthetechindustry.OnceIhadestablishedagoodreputationformyself,Ishiftedtospeakingaboutthecreativeprocess,removingcreativeblocks,andsilencingtheInnerCritic.AsIsuspected,thecontentresonateddeeplywithaudiences.WhenItookmypresentationcontentastepfurtherbywritinganarticlecalled“BanishingYourInnerCritic,”theresponsewasphenomenal.Hundredsofpeoplepostedandsharedthearticleonsocialmediaforseveraldays.Itevengotcelebrityattention:onGoogle+,actressFeliciaDaysharedthearticleandvouchedforthetechniquesthatIshared.AlloftheresponsesvalidatedwhatIhadsuspectedwhentheideaforthecreativitytalkfirstcametometheshower:theInnerCriticisaproblemthateveryonehasandthateveryoneneedshelpwith.
Duringthenextfewyears,throughthefeedbackfrommoretalks,keynotes,workshops,severalmorearticles,coachingclients,andheartfeltemailsfromattendeesandreadersdescribinghowmuchtheinformationspoketothemandalteredtheirlives,Iknewitwastimeformetoreachanevenwideraudience.IknewthenthatIhadtotakemycontenttothenextlevelandmakeitmoreaccessibletoevenmorepeople.Theindicationswereclear:itwastimeformewriteahandbookonhowtoBanishtheInnerCritic.Throughthisbook,Icouldhelppeoplereclaimtheircreativepowerandstartachievingmoresuccessbysilencingtheirownvoiceofself-doubt.
It’s Time for You to Triumph Too You’vefeltlostandinastupor,wanderingyourownwastelandsofself-criticism.Fortunately,youareaboutto(re)discoveryourCreativeSelfandyourCreativePower,andbreakyourselfoutofyourInnerCritic-inducedtrance. Inthisbook,youwill
• learntheoriginsoftheInnerCritic
BanishYourInnerCritic(excerpt) Introduction
Copyright©2017byDeniseJacobs.Allrightsreserved. 8
• discovertheonebrainfunctionandthreeskillsthatyoualreadypossesstovanquishyourInnerCritic
• learnmultiplemethodstodealwiththefearofbeingnegativelyevaluatedbyothers
• discoverhowtotransformhighlycriticalself-talkintothatofapprovalandencouragement
• workonbolsteringyoursenseofselftofeelthatyouandyourideasaregoodenough
• acknowledge,unblock,andenhanceyourcreativity
• channelyournowflowingcreativityasaforceforpositivechangeintheworld
You,myfriend,areapathfinder,andthisbookisamanualtoguideyoualongthepathofsilencingyourInnerCritic.Throughthepagesofthisbook,I’llbeyourmentor,providingyouwithnecessaryinformationtochangeyourthinkinghabits,andyourcoach,cheeringyouonasyoureleaseyourinnercriticalthoughtsandreplacethemwiththoughtsthatsupportyourcreativityandmotivateyoutodoyourbestwork.Throughthisprocess,I’vetotallygotyourback.
Butthebestpartisthatthroughusingthetoolscontainedinthesechapters,insteadofbeingyourownworstcreativeenemy,you’llhaveyourownbacktoo.Bytheendofthisprocess,you’llonlyvalueandrespectyourcreativitymore,butyou’llalsoenduplikingandappreciatingyourselfmoreonthewhole.Furthermore,you’llfindyourselffreefromtheweightofworryingaboutwhatothersthink,andyou’llbeabletobreakawayfromtherestrictionsofshoulds,musts,andoughts.You’llescapethetrapofcomparingyourselftoothers,andyou’lldropthebeliefthatyoudon’tknowenoughorthatyouneedtofigureeverythingoutbyyourself.
AreyoureadytostartlookingatthewaysyourInnerCriticshowsup,discoveringhowtofaceyourfears,bringingmistakenbeliefstothesurfaceofyourawareness,andmovingbeyondthemtoreachyourownuniqueformofempoweredcreativityontheotherside?
Readon,becauseweareabouttoembarkonajourneytoquietthatinsidiousInnerCriticsoyoucanunleashyourcreativity,letyourtruetalentsshine,andstartdoingyourbestwork–andultimately,liveyourbestlifebychannelingyourcreativepowerforgood.
Let’stakethefirststeptoawholenewworldrightnow–together.
BanishYourInnerCritic(excerpt) Chapter1:WhyBanishtheInnerCritic?
Copyright©2017byDeniseJacobs.Allrightsreserved. 9
1 Why Banish the Inner Critic? This chapter examines:
Creativity and Creative Flow
Inner Critic Origins
Creativity v. the Inner Critic
The Need to Reclaim Creativity
A Call to Action
“Whatisthisselfinsideus,thissilentobserver,
Severeandspeechlesscritic,whocanterroriseus
Andurgeusontofutileactivity,
Andintheend,judgeusstillmoreseverely
Fortheerrorsintowhichhisownreproachesdroveus?”
—T.S.Eliot,TheElderStatesman
Our Intrinsic Creativity Theideafirstcomestoyouunbidden.Aglimmerontheedgeofyourperception,it’shazy,notfullyformed,itsedgesfuzzyandindistinct.“Wheredidthatcomefrom?”youwonderbriefly.Butonceyouputyourfullattentionontheidea,thelongeryoufocus,themoreclearanddistinctitbecomes.Youbegintofeelawellingwithin:apushfromyourgutandaquickeningofyourheart. Youhavetocaptureit,thisidea.Yougrabapieceofpaperandjotdownnotesordoaquicksketch.Ormaybeyourecordaquickvoicememoonyourphone.Butthe
BanishYourInnerCritic(excerpt) Chapter1:WhyBanishtheInnerCritic?
Copyright©2017byDeniseJacobs.Allrightsreserved. 10
ideawon’tleaveyoualone,andreturnstoyouwithincreasedinsistenceandclarity.Yourbrainstartstoexplodewithrelatedideasasyoustarttoconnectthedots.Yourimaginationtakesover,visualizinghowtoexecutethisconceptthathasstolenyourattention. Nothing–nomentalbarrierofself-doubtorquestioning–comesbetweenyouandyourcreativework.Nothinginyousays“no”or“Idon’tknow.”Instead,everythinginyousays“yes”asyoubegintheprocessofmakingyourideamanifest.Andthemorethedetailsfallintoplacelikepuzzlepiecescomingtogether,themore“yes”youfeel.Arushofenergyflowsthroughyou,compellingandmotivatingyoutoprioritizeyourbrainchild.Interest,curiosity,andfascinationtakeover. Hoursflybyasyouareengrossedinyourproject.Inthemidstofmaking,youfeelclear,super-focused,andconfident.Onceyou’vefinallyacteduponyouridea,youfeelasenseofcompletionandsatisfaction.
Whileitisnotthesameforeverysinglecreativeendeavor,thisistheessenceoftheexperience.Mostpeoplecomingoutofthethroesofcreatingwilltellyou,faceaglowandeyesstillshining,thattheexperience,onthewhole,wasamazing.Regardlessofwhetheryouweredesigninganinterfaceforanapp,gettingdownideasforyourstartup,writingablogpost,developingsoftware,cookingasix-coursegourmetdinner,orchoreographingaperformance–theprocessgoingoninyourheadandthesensationsyouwerehavingwereuniversal. Infact,inmykeynotesandworkshops,oneofmyfavoritepiecesofaudienceparticipationiswhenIasktheattendeesaboutwhatcreativeflowfeelslikeforthem.Theresponses–regardlessoftheaudiencelocationordemographics–areremarkablysimilar.Herearethewordsthatcomeuptimeandtimeagain:
Timeless・Connected・Happy・Good・Strong・Clear・Focused・ Confident・Alive・Vibrant・Energized・Everythingflows・Euphoric・
Trance-like・Enjoyable・Empowered・Capable
Whenwearecreative,weareblissfully“inthezone,”engagedinsoul-satisfyingmakingandproducing.InhisbookCreativity,MihalyCsikszentmihalyi,thepioneeringresearcherwhofirstidentifiedthestateofflow,says,“whenweareinvolvedincreativity,wefeelthatwearelivingmorefullythanduringtherestoflife.”Yes!Creativitymakesusfeelfullyalive. Beforeyoufallbackonanylimitedideasaroundwhatcreativityis,allowmetodispelafewmyths.Youdon’thavetobeavisualartist,writer,ormusiciantobecreative.Youdon’thavetobeeccentric,neurotic,tortured,orstarving.Creativityisn’tsolelythedomainofagroupof“special”peoplewhomyou’llneverbeapartof. Weareborncreative.Creativityisaboutseeingpossibilities.It’saspark,astirring,animpetus:apowerfulforcethatcompelsustocreateandbringanideatolife.
BanishYourInnerCritic(excerpt) Chapter1:WhyBanishtheInnerCritic?
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Thispowerisineverybody.Weallhavethedesiretocreatesomethingoutofnothing,beitarecipe,apoem,orabusiness.Creativityisn’twhatyouproduceorthemediumyouusetoproduceit. What’smore,weeachhaveourownuniqueformofcreativity,sodon’tbefooledintobelievingthatjustbecausewhatyouaregreatatcreatingisn’t“art”thatit’snotvalid.Infact,ifyouareanengineer,scientist,oranyoneelseofananalyticbent,andyoubelieveyourselftobeinthecategoryof“peoplewhoaren’tcreative,”you’rewrong.Instead,youareoneofthemostcreativeandimaginativekindsofpeopleontheplanet. I’mheretotellyouthatyouarecreative.Yes,YOU. CreativityistheessenceofourbeingandapartofourDNA.Indeed,neuroscienceshowsthatweareliterallywiredforit.
Your Brain on Creativity Everyonehasthecapacitytoexperiencethe“optimalstateofconsciousnesswherewebothfeelandperformourbest.”1Oneofthegreatparadoxesofcreativeflow,however,isthatyoucan’tforceit;youcanonlycreatetheproperenvironmentforaccessingit.Theconditionsneededtogetintoaflowstateareaconfluenceofuninterruptedtimetoconcentrate,cleargoals,thecorrectratioofchallengetoskill,andimmediatefeedbackfromouractions.2Thenthemagichappens. Oncewegetintoflow,timeperceptionbecomesaltered.Hoursseemlikeminutes,and/orminutesseemlikehours.Wefeelaeuphoricsenseofcontrolandpersonalpower,butparadoxicallyloseoursenseofself.Performanceofallkindsisheightenedtremendously–creativeperformanceinparticular.Butitgetsevenbetter:theeffectsofflowgobeyondtheimmediatemoment.HarvardresearcherTeresaAmabilediscoveredthatpeoplecontinuetofeelcreativethedayafter.3Icallthis“theflowafterglow.”Asweincreasinglyachievecreativeflow,wetrainourbrainstobeevenmorecreative. Thegoodnewsisthatifyoudon’tthinkofyourselfascreativeortrustyourcreativity,youcannowrelax.Beingcreativeisbuiltintothewayourbrainsaredesignedtowork.Onacellularlevelduringtheflowstate,serotoninanddopamine,whicharethepleasure-inducingbrainchemicalsorneurotransmitters,washoverourbrains.Anotherneurotransmitter,endorphin,improvesfocus–helpingtoshutoutdistractions.Thisincreasesourabilitytomakenewmentalconnections,furtherenhancingperformance.Anandamide,aneurotransmitterwhosenameisderivedfromtheSanskritwordforbliss,entersthescene.Inadditiontoencouragingthebraintopracticelateralthinking4andtoreleaseevenmoredopamine,anandamidehelpsgeneratepleasureandmotivation Speakingofthebrain,creativitydoesnothappenbecausethe“imaginative”rightbraintakesoverthe“analytical”leftbrain.Infact,scientistsconsidertheconceptofcreativitybeingseatedintherightsideofthebrainasarchaic.5
BanishYourInnerCritic(excerpt) Chapter1:WhyBanishtheInnerCritic?
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Themostexcitingfindingaboutcreativityinthebrainisthis:researchersnowconsidercreativitytobebasedinthepartofthebrainresponsibleforplanning,self-evaluation,andself-censorship.6Thedorsolateralprefrontalcortexiswherethemajorityofhighercognitivefunctionsofworkingmemory,mentalimagery,andwilledaction(specificallyself-monitoringandimpulsecontrol)lives.Inotherwords,thisisthepartofthebrainthatinterpretssituations,envisionsconsequences,andthenadaptsbehavioraccordingly.Contrarytowhatyoumightthink,thegoalisnotforthisareatobeactive.Rather,creativemagichappenswhenthedorsolateralprefrontalcortexpowersdownandstaysquiet.Simplyput,creativitycomesfromrelaxingself-evaluationandself-judgment–andtheself-criticismandself-doubtthatresultfromthem. Thereinliestherub.
Creativity, Interrupted Childrenareterrificexamplesofunfetteredcreativity;theyeffortlesslycreateworldswiththeirimagination.Asachild,youdidthistoo.Whenwewereyounger,wetrustedthecreativesparkthatliveswithinus,andweeasilyplayedwithideasandletthemoutintotheworld.Imaginationwasourbooncompanion,andcreativity,ourbestfriend. Overtime,ouroncecloserelationshipwithourcreativitybecomesstrained.Insteadofexercisingourabilitytobringforthsomethingnewandpositiveintotheworld,webegintopracticecreativity’seviltwin,destructivity:usingourimaginationinwaysthatsabotageourcreativeefforts.Why?Becauseanewplayercropsup,wedgingitselfbetweenusandouroncebestbuddyofcreativity.Posingasaswornprotector,thisinterloperbeginstowhisperdoubtsinourearaftereveryletdown,everyunexpectedcriticism,andeveryperceivedfailure. Whereweusedtotrustintheflowofinspirationandideasfromourcreativity,wenowbegintosecond-guessthesemessagesthroughthefilterofthisnewinterpreter.Westarttofallpreytotheincessantinternalcriticalvoicethattellsusthatwedon’tknowenough,thatwemightlookstupidandbecriticized,thatourideasaren’toriginal,thatwearen’tworkinghardenough–andthatwehavetodo,be,andproducemoreinordertobeaccepted.Wefallvictimtoouranxietythatwe’llbefoundoutasafraud,thatourworkhastobeexecutedperfectlytoberecognizedandvalued,thatwewillfailatthechallengeswetakeon,orthatwecan’tkeepupwiththeskillsandtechnologiesthatweneedforourwork.It’snowonderwecrackundertheweightofthebeliefthatwearen’tenough. Whathappenedtotheunselfconsciousstateofflowingcreativitythatweusedtoentersoeasily?Whathappenedtothelife-in-technicolorexperiencesthatleftuswithasenseofwonderatwhatweproducedandexcitementatdoingmoreinthefuture?
BanishYourInnerCritic(excerpt) Chapter1:WhyBanishtheInnerCritic?
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Myfriend,yourenjoyablecreativeprocessandaccesstoyourcreativepowerhavebeenusurpedbyinternalcriticalthoughtsrootedinoldfearsandmistakenbeliefs.MayIintroducetoyou:theInnerCritic.
Meet the Inner Critic Whileweareborncreative,wearenotbornself-critical.Strongself-reflectionisnecessarytohelpachildevaluateherorhisbehaviorinordertomakegoodchoices.However,self-judgmentandself-criticismreplacesself-reflection,anditthengrowsuncheckedduringadolescence,throughadulthood,andtotheendsofourlivesintoaforcethatblocksusfromreachingourcreativepotential.Excessiveself-criticismcanbecomethepredominantinfluenceinourlives,erectingobstructionstoopportunitiesandholdingusbackfromsteppingintoourcreativegreatness.Whatisthisparticularformofuncheckedself-criticism?ThispsychologicalconstructisknownastheInnerCritic. Bornfromexperiencesinternalizedearlyinlife,theInnerCriticisanamalgamationofeverycriticalthingwe’veeverheard(orthoughtweheard)frompeopleofinfluence.Intheirattemptstopushustoconformtothenormsofsociety,parents,olderfamilymembersorcaretakers,teachers,coaches,siblings,peers,andfriendsareafountofcriticism-filledmessages.Inourimpressionablestate,weinternalizethesecriticisms.Wemodelthem,viewingourselvesfromaplaceofcriticismandjudgment.Wemayevenunconsciouslyemulatethenegativebeliefsthatthepeopleclosesttousholdaboutthemselves. Thus,messagesfromourchildhoodlike,“youwillneverbesuccessful”or“yourideasarenogood”embedthemselvesintoourpsyches.Aswegetolder,thesecriticismsandjudgmentsbecomesodeeplyingrainedthatwenolongercanrecognizethemasmessagesthatoriginatedfromoutsideofourownminds.Wethenbelievethesecriticalmessagestobeourowntruths,formingthewarpandweftofthefabricofhowwerelatetoourselves. AlthoughtheInnerCriticisalsoknownastheinnercriticalvoice7,youmaynotdetectitspresencebyactuallyhearingavoice.TheInnerCriticcanbesneaky,workingtoavoiddetectionbytryingtoappearasyournativethoughts.Sofamiliarastobeinvisible,yourInnerCriticreflexmaybesoautomaticthatyoumaynotevenregisterthethoughts.Ifyoudonotdetectitspresence,you’llmostlikelyrecognizetheInnerCriticthroughthehabitualnegativeself-talkthatdirectlyinfluencesyourbehavior. WhatdrivestheInnerCritic?Thedesiretoprotectourselves. OuremotionalmindsdevelopedtheInnerCriticasaprotectionstrategyagainstsituationsinwhichwecouldbejudged,rejected,orcriticized.Initsdeterminationtokeepthesepotentialfuturethreatsatbay,theInnerCriticdefendsourwell-beingandsocialsafetythemomentwehaveasenseoflosingeither.IthinkoftheInnerCriticasaproactivementalthreat-to-selfsystem.
BanishYourInnerCritic(excerpt) Chapter1:WhyBanishtheInnerCritic?
Copyright©2017byDeniseJacobs.Allrightsreserved. 14
Butallofthisstilldoesn’tanswerthequestionofwhat’sthetruesourceoftheInnerCritic.Whatdoourinnercriticalthoughtshaveincommonattheircore?Oneword:Fear. Ifyou’refeelinganxious,guilty,orashamedaroundyourcreativity,it’slikelyaresultoftheInnerCritic’shandiwork.Whenwearedeepinthewoodsofourinnercriticalthoughts,inessence,weareexperiencingfear.Havingthesefeelingsdisruptsrelaxedandorderedthinking,andinitsplace,weexperiencewhatCsikszentmihalyicalls“disorderedattention.”Inthisstate,weturnourattentioninwardandfocusonthenegative,destroyingourabilitytopursuepositiveexternalgoalsorevenaccomplishthetaskathand.Themoreweareinthisstateofmind,themoreourcapacityforenjoymentplummetsasitbecomemoredifficulttolearnanythingnew.Instead,werehasholdinformation,wanderingtheforestofourfearswithnomeanstoproblem-solveourwayoutofit.
Creativity vs. The Inner Critic Earlier,welearnedthattheprefrontalcortex,thepartofthebrainthatjudges,criticizes,andrulesself-inhibition,fallssilentwhenwegointocreativeflow.ThisistheseatoftheInnerCritic.ResearchshowsthatnotonlydoesaquietInnerCriticfacilitatecreativeflow,butcreativeflowconverselykeepstheInnerCriticquiet.CreativityandtheInnerCritic,then,areinextricablyconnected.Buttheyarebinary:theycannotcoexist.IfyourInnerCriticisincontrol,thenaccessingyourcreativitywillbeelusiveatbestandimpossibleatworst. Yes,you’vehadsuccesswithcreativeprojects,andyes,youmayhavebeenfairlysatisfiedwithwhatyouproducedafterthefact.However,ifyouhadanoverlyactiveInnerCriticduringtheprocess,thefactthatthatyouwereabletoproducewasdespiteitsoverbearingpresenceratherthanbecauseofitsallegedlybeneficialinput.Insteadoffeelingprotected,youhadtoslogthroughaquagmireofanxiety.Isthisreallyhowyouwanttocreate? Anyself-judgment,self-criticism,ordoubtsaboutyourabilitieswillobliteratecreativeflow,rippingyoufromyourcreativehightocastyoubackonthegroundwhileyougrapplewithyourfears.Yourprefrontalcortex,whichwaspreviouslyfavorablyinactive,firesbackupwithalitanyofallegedlyrationalreasonstogointoself-protectionmode.Allwhilethistranspires,thedoortoyourcreativepowerslamsshutandyoucannotfullyrealizeyourvision.TheInnerCriticistheenemyofcreativity,productivity,andsanity. Incontrast,whenweareincreativeflow,wefeelthefullpotentialofourpersonalcreativepower,anenhancedandstrengthenedsenseofself.Peoplewhoexperiencecreativeflowregularlyreportfeelingfocusedandcreative,engagedandmotivated,activeandconnected,andstrongandincontrol.Thisplaceofempowermentisourtruecreativehome.
BanishYourInnerCritic(excerpt) Chapter1:WhyBanishtheInnerCritic?
Copyright©2017byDeniseJacobs.Allrightsreserved. 15
Feelingfullycreativelikethisiswhatwewantandneed.Butsomanyofuscutourselvesofffromthispower,byjudgingideasbeforetheyhaveachancetodevelop,attemptingtoattainunreachablestandards,creatingbarriersforourselves,keepingourimaginationsunderwraps,ordenyingthatwearecreativeatall.Butwecandobetter.Wecandomorewiththispowerfulforce. Ifyouthinkofcreatingasanunpleasantandagonizingprocess–thenyou’renotthinkingaboutactualcreating.Instead,you’rerecallingthesensationoftheInnerCritictriggeringyourfearsandsupplantingtheprocess.It’stheInnerCriticthatmakescreatingpainful.Yourcriticalthoughtsarethemainblockadetoyourcreativity.Theythwartthefluidprocessofideasmovingfromyourinternalsubconsciousuniversetoyourconsciousmindtoaccessandmaketangible. Insuccumbingtothevoiceofdoubt,werelinquishourcreativepowertotheInnerCritic.AccordingtoCsikszentmihalyi,thestruggleforwrestlingcontrolfromtheInnerCriticisnolessthanthebattlefortheself.Makenomistake:thestruggleisreal. Hereisthesimpletruth:
Tobecreative,youhavetosilencetheInnerCritic. BanishingtheInnerCriticiswhatweneedtodotoreclaimourcreativepower.
Reclaiming Creativity First,thebadnews:weeachhaveanInnerCritic,andtryaswemight,wecanneitherrunawayfromourInnerCriticnorcompletelydestroyit.TheInnerCriticisapartofourpsycheandbeinghuman. Don’tthrowupyourhandsindespair!Despiteallofthepsychologicalpowerthatitholds,theInnerCriticisreallyawayofthinking–aseriesofthoughts.Evenmoresimplyput,itiselectricalimpulsesinthebrain.Neuronsfiring.Chemicalsbeingreleasedandrecognizedbyreceptorsinthebrain.Justaswecanlearntocontrolourbreathing,wecanlearntohaveabetterhandleontheseprocessesinourbrainstobemoreincontrolofourthoughts,beliefs,andconsequentactions. Nowhere’sthegoodnews:ifwecanlearntoswitchoff(orattheveryleast,tonedown)theself-evaluation,self-judgmentandcriticism,andself-doubt,thenwecanactivateandlightuptheareasinthebrainassociatedwithself-expression.Wecancreatethespaceandlaythefoundationsforgettingintoourcreativeflow. Rememberthatchildfullofwonderandunfetteredcreativityatthebeginningofthechapter?That’syoudeepinside.Alsoinsideistheselfthatembodiesalloftheinherentpotentialyouwerebornwithandthatwillalwaysbethere:thecapacitiesyou’verealizedandthosethatyouhaveyettoactualize.Iliketothinkofthisasyourtrueself,yourCreativeSelf.Itexistedbeforethelayersofsocietalexpectationwereheapeduponyourshoulders,anditwillstandtriumphantonceyoushakeofftheshoulds,musts,andoughts.Thispartofyouiswhatyoustartedwith:completely
BanishYourInnerCritic(excerpt) Chapter1:WhyBanishtheInnerCritic?
Copyright©2017byDeniseJacobs.Allrightsreserved. 16
connectedtoyourownflowofideas,withaperspectiveontheworldwhichonlyyouhave,andanexperientialfilterthatcomprisesyourownuniquecreativity. ThisinherentCreativeSelfiskey.Itiswhatfillspeoplewithawewhenwitnessinganinspiredmusicalperformanceoragiftedathlete.Thiscompleteabsenceoffriction,self-doubt,andself-judgmententrancesandinspiresus.It’sbeautiful.TheircompleteexpressionoftheCreativeSelfgivesussomethingtoaspiretoourselves. DidyouknowthatthereisnowordintheTibetanlanguageforcreativityorbeingcreative?Theclosesttranslationis“natural.”8Inotherwords,ifyouwanttobemorecreative,youhavetobemorenatural,moreofyourself.However,theInnerCritictellsusthatonlyifwe’rehardonourselvescanwebecomethepeoplewe’remeanttobe.Thisisalie.Thepeoplewhowearemeanttobeareexactlywhoweare.We’remeanttobecomemoreofourselves–notcookiecuttercopiesofthosearoundus. YourCreativeSelfiswhereyourcreativepowerlies,thesourceofyourbrilliance.Thisisyourpowerfulself;itisyourbrainclickingintogearandactivatingthewonderfullycomplexnetworkthatishardwirednotonlyintoyourbrainbutyoursoul.TheCreativeSelftrustsitself,knowsitsstrengths,anddelightsinpushingitsboundaries.TheCreativeSelfisfarstronger,farmoreknowledgeable,andinfinitelymorecapablethantheInnerCritic.9WeneedtoreducetheInnerCritic’sinterferencesotheCreativeSelfcandowhatitdoesbest:creating. TheInnerCriticislikestatic,whiletheCreativeSelfisthestationyou’retryingtotuneinto.Wedohaveachoice:wedon’thavetolistentothestatic.BygivingtheInnerCriticlessofourbandwidth,weaccess,express,andcultivateourcreativity;wetakebackourcreativepower.Fromthisplaceofreclaimedcreativepower,wecangoafterevenbiggerchallenges. Reclaimingcreativityisanactofcourage:choosingtoactinthefaceofthefearthattheInnerCriticgenerates,andmakingaconsciouschoicetothinkdifferentlyinordertoaccessyourCreativeSelf. HowdowereachthisCreativeSelf?TryingtofixtheafflictionoftheInnerCriticwithitsowntoolsisnotgoingtowork.Youcan’tbully,threaten,orcoercetheInnerCritic.Itwrotethehandbookandknowsallofthetricks.No,wehavetouseatotallydifferentapproachtobanishtheInnerCritic. Withtraining,themindcanreplacedistortedpatternsofthinking.ToreleasetheInnerCritic’sholdonourcreativethinkingandaccesstoourcreativity,we’regoingtosetouttolearnnewapproaches,practices,andtools.Inthecomingchapters,we’lldiscovermuch-neededantidotestotheInnerCritic’sperniciousguisesofthefearofjudgmentandcriticism,beinghighlyself-critical,feelingdeficient,havingahabitofcomparison,anddenyingcreativity.
Areyouready?Let’sretrainourmindssothatwecanbanishtheInnerCritic,accessourCreativeSelves,andreclaimourcreativepower.
BanishYourInnerCritic(excerpt) Chapter1:WhyBanishtheInnerCritic?
Copyright©2017byDeniseJacobs.Allrightsreserved. 17
Notes:Chapter1–WhyBanishtheInnerCritic?1Kotler,Steven."FlowStatesandCreativity."PsychologyToday.AccessedDecember16,2016.https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-playing-field/201402/flow-states-and-creativity.2MihalyCsikszentmihalyi,Flow:ThePsychologyofOptimalExperience(NewYork:Harper&Row,1990),48-67.3Kotler,"FlowStatesandCreativity.”4Kotler,"FlowStatesandCreativity.”5AnneMcIlroy,"NeuroscientistsTrytoUnlocktheOriginsofCreativity."TheGlobeandMail.AccessedDecember16,2016.http://www.theglobeandmail.com/technology/science/neuroscientists-try-to-unlock-the-origins-of-creativity/article565081/.6McIlroy,"NeuroscientistsTrytoUnlocktheOriginsofCreativity."7Firestone,Robert,LisaA.Firestone,andJoyceCatlett.ConquerYourCriticalInnerVoice:ARevolutionaryProgramtoCounterNegativeThoughtsandLiveFreefromImaginedLimitations.Oakland,CA:NewHarbingerPublications,2002. 8DavidKelleyandTomKelley,CreativeConfidence:UnleashingtheCreativePotentialWithinUsAll(2013),6. 9W.TimothyGallwey,TheInnerGameofWork(NewYork:RandomHouse,2000),7.
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