how to deal with aggressive behaviors of children (hurting others)

HURTING OTHERS

Hurting Others

The child hurts other children in a variety of ways such as:

HITTING

KICKING

STRIKING

PINCHING

WRESTLING

PUNCHING

• Several forms of aggression are used in unpredictable ways.

• Set as much information as you can through informal observation of the child.

When does the behaviour occur?

• At all times of the day

• During specific activities, such as group times, discussion, or music

•When children are in close proximity

• During transitions, from one activity to another.

•During structured activities

•At outdoor playtimes

• Indoors

• Around mealtime

What usually happens before the behaviour occurs?

• Another child has something that the child wants

• The child has a verbal argument with another child

• The child is told no by a child or a teacher

• The child is close to others

• The child is pushed

• The child appears tired

•The child is provoked by another child

• The child is not able to accomplish a task

• The child does not want to participate in class routines

• There is no apparent provocation

Who is usually the victim?

• The same child or a certain few children

• Anyone

• Anyone who argues with the child

• Only timid children

• Only assertive children

• Older or bigger children

• Younger or smaller children

• Boys

• Girls

What happens when the child hurts another youngster?

• The child looks around to see if an adult is watching

• The child admits hurting the other child

• The child denies hurting the other child

• The other child hurts the offender in return

• The child apologizes or tries to make the victim feel better

• The child goes on to hurt other children

•The child stays near the child who was hurt

• The child tries to hurt the same child again

• The child walks away

How does the child hurt other children?

• There is a relation between what happened before the child hurt someone and hw he hurts that child.

• There is a relation between whom the child hurts and how he hurts that child.

• There is a relation between where the child is at the time he hurts someone and how he hurts that child.

• There appears to be no relation between how the child hurts other children and what preceded the aggression, who the other child is, and where the incident takes place.

• This informal observation period should provide clues to the problem that will help you implement ways of eliminating such behaviour.

Procedure

You will eliminate the child’s behaviour of hurting other children by using several simultaneous steps:

• Prevent instances of aggression whenever possible.

- Informal observation has given you some idea of when and under what circumstances the child is most likely to hurt others.

-Using such information, be on the lookout for any clues that indicate the child is about to hurt another child. - If the child’s anger is already aroused, do one of the two things, depending on the reactions of the child.  

1.If the child is receptive to talking, discuss his anger with him.

2. If the child does not respond to talking and simply wants to hit someone, use physical restraint. Put your arms around the child in a way that conveys your concern for him as a person as well as your need to keep him from attacking another child. Hold the child this way until you feel the tension leave him.

• Praise all positive social interactions.

- The child needs to learn acceptable ways of dealing with peers.

- It is important to let the child know when his social behaviour is appropriate.

- Praise positive interactions as often as possible.

•Systematically teach the child to control the impulse to hurt others.

- It is important to convey to the child that feelings of anger are natural and alright, but that hurting other people in reaction to anger is not acceptable.

• If the Child Does Hurt Someone, Use Time – out. Take the following steps:

1. Quickly make sure that the child who was hurt was all right. If at all possible, another teacher should attend to the victim.

2. Calmly take the child who has hurt another child to the time – out area. Firmly but quickly say, “I cannot allow you to hurt other children. You will have to sit here until I will tell you that you may get up.”

3. Note the time, and move away from the child. Do not talk with or look at the child during the time – out.

4. If another child approaches the time - out area, quietly move the child away. Explain, “Teddy needs to be himself for a few minutes. You can talk to him when he joins the class again.”

5. Promptly, at the end of the time, got to the child and say, “You may get up now.” Do not lecture. The child knows the reason for the isolation. Channel the child into constructive behaviour by suggesting that he join an ongoing activity.

• Continue keeping Track of the Behavior.

- As you work with the children on changing the aggressive behaviour, continue keeping track every time the child hurts someone.

- Record each day the total number of incidents of hurting other children by whatever means.

•It is quite possible that progress will be gradual.

•The graph will reflect even a small change; this will encourage you to continue the program.