making good men great

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MAKING GOOD MEN GREAT

by Gunter Swoboda, MAPS

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What’s ailing MEN?

THE SURVIVAL STAKES• Nearly one third of boys die before birth (Wilson et al., 1992).  !

• More boys than girls die of birth disorders and diseases in infancy !

• Boys show greater susceptibility to family stress, especially in the development of conduct disorders, and they continue to be more susceptible to both physical and psychological problems throughout the lifespan (Wilson et al., 1992). 

!• Aged 12 to 24 years there are three male deaths to every one female death,

with accidents and suicide accounting for most of this difference (Moon, Meyer, Grau, 2000). 

!• By the age of 65, females in Australia outnumber males by 25 per cent, and

by the age of 85 females outnumber males by 50 per cent (ABS, 2006).

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SOME OF THE ISSUES • Changes in roles and expectations of men.

• Changes in life expectancy and the impact

on later life.

• Lack of awareness and understanding of

the health issues men face.

• Men do not openly discussing their health

and how they’re feeling

• Reluctance to take action when men don’t

feel physical or mentally well.

• Men engage in risky activities that threaten

their health

• Stigmas surrounding mental health.

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WHAT ABOUT YOUNG MEN?

• nearly one in five young men in the past 12

months have felt that life is hardly worth living,

• nearly one in 10 young men have thought

about taking their own life,

• unemployment and moderate to very high

levels of psychological distress predict suicidal

thoughts and behaviour,

• 42 percent of young men experiencing

psychological distress.

• For every woman who commits suicide, three

men die.

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We are surviving.

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But… we are not thriving.

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We need to rethink Masculinity.

TRADITIONAL:

• territorial

• hierarchical

• acquisitional

• competitive

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ALIGNED:

• inclusive

• democratic

• distributive

• co-operative

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WHAT DO I MEAN BY ‘ALIGNED’?

The integration or

harmonisation of physiology,

psychology, values,

behaviour, desires, beliefs

etc. in an individual and

within relationships.

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Being male is a matter of birth.

Being a man is a matter of age.

Being a Gentleman (Great Man) is a matter of choice.

Vin Diesel

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What are the choices I need to make?

THE GOALS ARE:

• emotional regulation

• behavioural flexibility

• physical and emotional

resilience

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Focus Relationship Values WellbeingInspiration Aligned Co-operation 😄😄😄😄😄😄

Communication Aspirational Respect 😄😄

Engagement Attached Love 😄

Action Anxious Emotional Vulnerability 😒😒

Tension Ambivalent Emotional Courage 😒😒😒😒

Unaware Absent Awareness 😒😒😒😒😒😒

THE RELATIONSHIPS MODEL

4 Spheres of Masculine Evolution

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‣ Physical: Live healthy. ‣ Mind-ful: Be rational,

reflective and resilient.

‣ Authentic: Be emotionally courageous to be emotionally vulnerable.

‣ Soul-ful: Be wise.

Evolved to:

Physical

Soul-ful

The Great Man

Mind-ful

Authentic

Living in Alignment

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Psychological

Social

PhysicalGood Physical Health: Nutrition, Exercise, Relaxation, Sleep

Think well and Feel well.

Relationships that are attached, aspirational, and aligned.

Having purpose, meaning and intention.

“The whole is greater than the sum of its parts.”Spiritual

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We need a Curriculum for change.

MENTORING, COACHING, FACILITATING AND SPEAKING

• Individual

• Family

• Work

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We need a NETWORK for support.

THE NETWORK:

• Groups for Men by Men

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Gunter is a psychologist, speaker, author, mentor, coach and facilitator with over three decades of counselling and organisational development experience. His passion for people, philosophy and psychology has allowed him to forge a curriculum to assist his clients to move beyond simply surviving in this world and to learn how to truly thrive within it. !!

In a world where the demands on the individual and the family has become more and more challenging, Gunter’s focus is on getting things back on track in three key areas: !

1. Individually!2. the family and!3. at work. !

His expertise, experience and who he is as a person has benefitted teenagers, young adults, and adults in overcoming serious psychological and social challenges, whilst the parents he has worked with have found a new sense of vision and purpose in raising their children through realigning their relationship with their child. !

Gunter has also been involved with small businesses as well as with large multinationals and public service organisations where he has provided executive and business coaching that has assisted many clients to achieve a high level of professional success.!!

In recent times, Gunter’s interest in men’s health issues has led to him to develop the project ‘Making Good Men Great’ that aims at helping men to rethink masculinity, provide a way to help men step away from an outmoded way of being, and become an inspiration to others. !!

Personally, Gunter has been successfully married for the past twenty-five years and has two adult children. He is a keen surfer, and when time allows likes to indulge his passion in percussion and creative writing. !!

He is the author of a historical action/adventure novel ‘Mountains of the Sea’ as well as short plays and stories.!

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Gunter O. Swoboda, MAPS!

Psychologist, Author, Speaker, Mentor & Consultant!

Swoboda & Associates Pty. Ltd.!

1801 Pittwater Road!

Mona Vale, Sydney, NSW 2103, Australia!

+61 2 9999 0429!

+1 0412 371 503! ! !

Email: gswoboda@bigpond.net.au