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by Blue SullivanThere are certain records that you may be familiar with. The fastest 100-meter dash, the top speed for a land vehicle and the first breaking of the sound barrier are just three common examples. We may not all know who holds these records, but at least we know these records are out there. Then, of course, there are other records that sit happily outside of the norm. Not only will almost no one know the names of these “famous” record holders, very few people will even be aware that these records exist. Here are a few examples of unusual bests from around the globe. • Did you know that Chris Elliott and Tyson Turk of

Bedford, Texas, hold the world record for the most body piercings in one session? Three thousand, one hundred piercings were performed in just over six hours, topping the previous best of 1,015 by a couple in the United Kingdom. (It seems some people aren’t happy with a nice pair of earrings anymore.)

• The record for “Most People Inside of a Bubble” is held by Fan and Deni Yang. The two wowed an audience with their outlandish talent for creating bubbles. As part of this year’s BubbleFest in Santa Ana, California, at the city’s Discovery Science Center, they created a soap bubble so large that they were able to fit 118 people inside it, setting the current world record. The BubbleFest, now in its 16th year, celebrates the science and math principles of bubbles.

• For Takuo Toda, chairman of the Japan Origami Airplane Association, breaking the “Longest Paper Airplane Flight” record with his time of 27.9 seconds was the culmination of an 11-year scientific effort. In April of 2009, Toda finally reached his goal when he turned a sheet of light sugarcane into a 10-cm craft that stayed aloft for almost 30 seconds. Toda’s model bore a striking resemblance to a NASA space shuttle that he recalled watching three decades before, yet Toda claims that his design actually preceded NASA’s by three or four years. In 1980, he began lobbying for a proposal to launch paper darts from the International Space Station, and in 2008, the Japan Aerospace Exploration Agency

Week of March 19, 2012 Vol. 2, Issue 5

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1. “Good Morning Starshine” is from what musical?2. Which group released “Dude (Looks Like a Lady)”?3. Who sang “Crazy for You,” and

when?4. Which female artist was given the nickname “Lit-tle Miss Dynamite?”5. “Shut Down Turn Off,” “Reminiscing” and “Lady” were 1978 releases by what rock group?6. Name the band that netted hits with “Happy To-gether “and “She’d Rather Be With Me.”

Answers1. “Hair,” in 1967. The song has been widely used, includ-ing on two episodes of “The Simpsons.”2. Aerosmith in 1987. It was written by band member Steven Tyler, now of “American Idol” judge fame.3. Madonna, in 1985. The song was used in the soundtrack for the film “Vision Quest.” Madonna wed Sean Penn that same year. The marriage lasted two years.4. Brenda Lee (born Brenda Mae Tarpley), for her power-ful voice in a small package: Lee was 4 feet 9 inches tall. Her first No. 1 hit was “I Want to Be Wanted” in 1960.5. Little River Band. “Reminiscing” was used in the recent Will Ferrell film “The Other Guys.”6. The Turtles, in 1967. They were originally a surf group called the Crossfires. More recently, “Happy Together” was used in a Nintendo commercial.

Italian Simmered Chicken BreastsThis is one of those “I’ve got 10 minutes to make din-ner, and I’m serving chicken again” solutions I bet you’ll love. If you’ve got a can of soup, a can opener and some tangy spices, you’ve got the meal under con-trol!

16 ounces skinned and boned uncooked chicken breasts, cut into 4 pieces1 (10 3/4-ounce) can reduced-fat tomato soup1/2 cup water1 1/2 teaspoons Italian seasoning

1. In a large skillet sprayed with olive oil-flavored cook-ing spray, brown chicken pieces for 3 to 4 minutes on each side. In a small bowl, combine tomato soup, water and Italian seasoning. Evenly spoon soup mixture over chicken pieces. 2. Lower heat, cover and simmer for 15 minutes or until chicken is tender. When serving, evenly spoon sauce over top of chicken pieces. Makes 4 servings.

„ Each serving equals: About 162 calories, 2g fat, 27g protein, 9g carb., 304mg sodium, 0g fiber; Diabetic Ex-changes: 3 Meat, 1/2 Starch.

THE BOLD AND THE BEAU-TIFULAware of how badly Hope and Liam’s first encounter went, Bill tried to convince Steffy to hold off on signing the annul-

ment papers. Hope asked Brooke not to tell anyone what she talked about in therapy. Ridge tried to talk Steffy out of leaving town as a way of coping with the end of her marriage. Hope and Liam tried once again to capture the elusive magic between them. Liam felt guilty for driving Steffy away because she was too heartbroken to be around him. Taylor and Brooke once again bickered over which of their daughters held the key to Liam’s heart. Wait to See: Hope reveals why she has a problem with intimacy. Bill faces a public-relations crisis.

DAYS OF OUR LIVESBillie informed Hope that Bo was dying. Fortunately, Lexie was able to resuscitate Bo, but his condition was still grave. John and Hope broke into the security office to get their passports so they could fly back to Salem. EJ planned to take advantage of the rift between Abe and Lexie. Carrie blamed herself for Austin’s affair. Melanie encouraged Abby to be truthful with Austin before his marriage was completely destroyed. Stefano refused to hand over Hope’s passport. Madison returned Brady’s engagement ring to him. Austin overheard Carrie pro-fess her love to Rafe. Kate told Billie that Sami was the mole. Rafe found out that Nicole was pregnant and agreed to keep the news secret from EJ. Wait to See: EJ has Jennifer arrested. Austin begs Carrie to give their marriage another shot.

GENERAL HOSPITALSonny and Todd squared off in the battle between Port Charles’ and Llanview’s hotheads. Meanwhile, Carly and Blair discovered that they had a lot in common. Johnny hoped to coax Delores over to his side so that he could get the upper hand on Sonny. John McBain arrived in Port Charles, and it was revealed that he and Sonny had crossed paths before. Olivia tried to take the heat off Johnny after overhearing Tracy and Anthony’s conversation. Maxie had a meltdown at Robin’s funeral. Sonny had some tough questions for Kate about her in-volvement with Ewen. Wait to See: Noah returns home. Sonny and Jason try to get a handle on McBain.

THE YOUNG AND THE RESTLESSPhyllis went to the coffee shop to see her granddaugh-ter while Daisy was out of sight. Nick turned down his father’s proposal to oversee the new cosmetics line with Sharon. Adam was skeptical of Victor’s offer to help him beat the charges. The police later allowed Adam to go free -- for now. Sharon offered to resign after over-hearing Lauren and the other board members litany of complaints about her. Daisy called her social worker, who advised her to get a restraining order on Phyllis. Jack made it his mission to see Adam rot in jail. Wait to See: Lauren tries to hide her PTSD symptoms from Michael. Ricky and Daisy form an alliance.

announced a three-year, 90 million yen (over 1.1 million U.S. dollars) study of that very thing. Though it may sound frivolous on its surface, the research could yield valuable information on how future spacecraft may be lighter and more aerodynamic. The next time your co-worker teases you for making paper airplanes, tell him you’re doing it for science!

• American Ashrita Furman presently holds 113 places of distinction within the “Guinness Book of World Records.” Nicknamed “Mr. Versatility,” Furman has set more than 340 records since 1979 in 35 countries on each of the world’s continents. In 2010, he sprinted his way into history with the aid of something generally reserved for the water — a pair of black and blue swim fins. He ran a mile (in fins) in 7 minutes, 56 seconds. In addition to breaking the “eight minute land swim fin mile” (a phrase that we are hoping to popularize), Furman’s accomplishment made him the current record holder for holding current records (the aforementioned 113).

• Breaking the “World’s Fastest Furniture” record, a lounge chair created by a design group from the United Kingdom was clocked at 87 miles per hour, well over the speed limit on nearly every highway in the world. Couch potatoes with a need for speed need look no further than the “Casual Lofa” (as its creators Cummfy Banana have deemed it), which has an actual vehicle license with the British Ministry of Transportation. In addition to its plush, leopard-patterned upholstery, the “Lofa” features the same unleaded A-series engine found in the Cooper Mini, along with a steering wheel that doubles as a pizza pan, a hand-operated brake and a throttle that can be operated with the feet up or down. In addition to its performance-driving chair, the company has also built a bed on wheels called the “Street Sleeper” that can go 69 miles per hour and a zooming tub (the “Bog Standard”) that can go 71. They even offer a motorized office suite for the more business-minded racing aficionado.

• For even the least fit or scientifically inclined among us, there is one record potentially within our reach, “Most T-Shirts Worn At Once.” On May 22, 2010, Croatia’s Krunoslav Budiseli bested a former Swedish record holder by wearing 245 T-shirts at the same time. The feat took a little less than two hours to complete and ended with the Croatian wearing about 150 pounds (68 kg) worth of T-shirts. Budiseli said things started to become difficult around the 120th shirt, yet he somehow summoned the strength and force of will to don 125 more. Will May 22 live on forever in the annals of Croatian T-shirt achievement? Only time will tell.

• In the annals of “records least likely to exist,” the “Most Nights Spent In A Room Full of Scorpions” record would’ve been pretty close to the top, yet Kanchana Ketkaew of Thailand actually managed it. Ketkaew spent 33 days in the company of 5,320 live scorpions. The room, which was made of glass, was not much larger than a normal office room — about 10 feet wide by 12 feet long. Despite sharing cramped quarters with a swarm of unfriendly crawling roommates, Ketkaew emerged relatively unscathed, getting stung only about 13 times.

• After a day of exciting-yet-exhausting chair racing, you are bound to want a snack. How about a bite of the current record holder for “World’s Biggest Cookie,” which weighed in at 40,000 pounds? In 2003, the owners and employees of the Immaculate Baking Company converged to bake a cookie designed to satisfy even the largest of appetites. About a 100 feet in diameter, the cookie was so big that it had to be photographed from 100 feet above just to get it all on camera!

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1. HISTORY: In what year did the RMS Titanic sink, killing 1,517 people?2. GEOGRAPHY: What is the largest country in South Amer-ica?3. GENERAL KNOWLEDGE: In what year was the festival of Kwanzaa established?4. POLITICS: Nellie Tayloe Ross was the first woman gover-nor of what state?5. MOVIES: Which Disney movie’s soundtrack features five Elvis Presley songs?6. SUPERHEROES: What was the name of The Green Hor-net’s car?7. SCIENCE: What substance speeds the rate of a chemical reaction?8. LANGUAGE: What is the meaning of the Latin word “con-tra”? 9. MUSIC: What is the name of Tom Petty’s backup band?10. PERSONALITIES: What actress was briefly married to boxer Mike Tyson?

Answers 1. 1912 2. Brazil 3. 1966 4. Wyoming 5. “Lilo & Stitch” 6. Black Beauty 7. A catalyst 8. Against 9. The Heartbreakers 10. Robin Givens

Q: The addition of James Spader to “The Office” as Robert California has really helped with Steve Carell’s leaving. Now I hear

that James is leaving the show. Is it true? -- Donald D. in MinnesotaA: James Spader will not be back next season. Executive producer Paul Lieberstein (who also plays Toby) says that it was always James’ intent to stay only one season. In fact, he was scheduled to be in only last year’s finale but, as Paul stated, James’ scenes were so compelling, “those two scenes became a season.”

***Q: I’m going through some serious “True Blood” withdrawal. Do you know when it’ll be back for its fifth season? -- Kristen B., via e-mailA: Eric, Bill and company want to do bad things with you for 12 episodes this summer. If you hunger for a new Sookie adventure, then head to your local bookstore on May 1 for the release of “Deadlocked,”

the latest installment in the Southern Vampire Mysteries on which the HBO series is based. You also can reacquaint yourself with season four on May 29, when the series will be released on DVD and Blu-ray.

***Q: I am thrilled to hear that “Titanic” is being rereleased soon in 3-D. Can you tell me when it will hit theaters? -- Jeanette F., Gary, Ind.A: Look for the big boat on the big screen starting Friday, April 6, and be prepared for even more thrills than the original release. Because of the new 3-D effects, it can only make the sinking scenes even more intense. And believe me, they were scary enough to begin with -- even for the actors involved.

I spoke with “Titanic” co-star Eric Braeden, who portrayed John Jacob Astor, and he told me about filming his drowning scene. Eric, who also has played billionaire businessman Victor Newman on “The Young and The Restless” since 1980, revealed to me: “That was one of the scariest moments in this business for me, because you had all that water coming from the sides, and 150 tons of water coming from the top. Once the water reaches a certain level, then

everything that is not bolted to the bottom just crashes through the room. With the water rising and rising, and then suddenly 150 tons comes on top -- it was one of the scariest moments I’ve spent in this business.”

***Q: My husband and I love “A Gifted Man,” and wonder if it’ll be back this fall. -- The Crouses, Virginia Beach, Va.A: Things are not looking good for the CBS medical drama, which stars Patrick Wilson. Its ratings have been pretty low, and two of the series’ stars have been cast in other fall shows as backup. You can sign a petition for CBS to keep the show at tvseriesfinale.com/tv-show/a-gifted-man-petition-22315, or via snail mail: Ms. Nina Tassler, CBS, 7800 Beverly Blvd., Los Angeles, CA 90039, RE: A Gifted Man.

PHOTO: James Spader

HOLLYWOOD -- The Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences isn’t just about the Oscars anymore. It’s opening an Academy Museum of Motion Pictures at the Los Angeles County Museum of Art. To ensure suc-

cess, it’s acquired the actual Ruby Slippers that Judy Garland clicked three times in the “The Wizard of Oz.” The Academy wouldn’t reveal what it paid for them, although insiders say it was between $2 million and $3 million. The Ruby Slippers were bought with money from angel investors led by Leon-ardo DiCaprio, Steven Spielberg and Terry Semel.It’s believed there originally were seven pairs of Ruby Slip-pers designed by MGM costumer Gilbert Adrian. The first pair, a prototype called the “Arabian test pair,” were wildly jeweled in an Arabian motif, with curling toes and heels, and used for costume tests. They were sold at Debbie Reynolds’ auction, in December, for $510,000. Six identical pairs were made with 2,300 sequins and a jewel-encrusted, butterfly-shaped red leather bow. Pair No. 1, size 5, were worn by Judy Garland. Pair No. 2, size 6B, were worn by her stand-in, Bob-bie Koshay. Pair No. 3 were on the Wicked Witch of the East as she lay beneath Dorothy’s house. They were later used to click Dorothy’s heels three times. Pair No. 4 was a back-up for Judy Garland’s pair.Pair No. 1 were donated, anonymously, to the Smithsonian Institute in l979. They’re currently on loan to the National Museum of American History for an “American Stories” ex-hibit, opening April 5. In their absence, the Scarecrow’s hat is filling the void. Pair No. 2 were won by Roberta Bauman in 1940, as second prize in a “name the 10 best films of l939” contest. In l988, her pair was sold at auction at Christie’s to Anthony Landini for $165,000, In 2000, those shoes were sold to memorabilia collector David Elkouby for $666,000.Pair No. 3, “the witch’s pair,” were bought at Christie’s a few days later by Philip Samuels, also for $165,000. This is the pair now owned by The Academy. Pair No. 4 was sold to col-lector Michael Shaw by MGM costumer Kent Warner. Shaw loaned the Ruby Slippers in 1990 to The Judy Garland Fes-tival in Grand Rapids, Minn., from which they were stolen and never recovered. Shaw received a settlement from a $1 million insurance policy.Two other pairs might still exist. A pair of test shoes, known as the Bugle Bead Shoes, with no bows, have never surfaced. Collector Bill Thomas claims to have the last pair, but refuses to show them to anyone.When you consider it cost less than $5,000 to make ALL the Ruby Slippers in 1939, it may pay to learn shoemaking!

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NASCAR has its first two Sprint Cup race winners in Matt Kenseth, left, and Denny Hamlin. The question is: Can they keep their momentum? (John Clark/NASCAR This Week pho-to)

Don’t Get Carried Away ... Yet

Early in every season, it’s easy to get carried away. The season has 34 more races. Even Jimmie Johnson, who left the Daytona 500 (pending appeal of NASCAR penalties) with minus 23 points, has 24 races to

make the Chase.As if to prove the lunacy of drawing early conclusions, Johnson came back to finish second in the season’s second race. He had crashed after one lap at Daytona.Matt Kenseth, of course, won the 500 for the second time.In 2009, Kenseth won the 500 and followed it up a week later with a victory in Fontana, Calif. He failed to win again that season and missed the Chase for one of only two times in his career. This time the second race was at Phoenix International Raceway, and Kenseth finished 13th.Denny Hamlin took the Sprint Cup point lead by winning Phoenix’s Sub-way Fresh Fit 500 a week after he finished fourth in the Daytona 500.Even though it’s early yet, Hamlin was ecstatic about his early momen-tum, especially since he is coming off a bit of a down year.“Huge momentum,” Hamlin said. “We’ve never been in this position this early in the season. We’ve always struggled. We’ve always taken our time -- five or six races in -- before we hit our stride.“He (crew chief Darian Grubb) made me a winner today.”Ah, Darian Grubb. He was Tony Stewart’s crew chief last year. In fact, Grubb was fired by the reigning champion. He moved to Joe Gibbs Rac-ing, Toyota and Hamlin. As a result, dating back to the 2011 Chase, the winning crew chief in six of the last 12 races is ... Grubb.

Not that the drivers, Stewart and Hamlin, didn’t have a lot to do with it, mind you.Stewart is off to a slow start. Remember, though, that he barely made the Chase last year, and his performances didn’t take off until the Chase, when Stewart won half the 10 championship-deciding races.In short, it’s way too soon to start drawing conclusions.

Can Dog Droppings Attract Pests?

DEAR PAW’S CORNER: We make sure to pick up after our dog, both when out for a walk and in the yard, which keeps the neighborhood and our lawn looking good. We store the collected excrement in an open box by the garage, daily, and then dispose of it each week in the trash. However, since this past summer we

have been finding wood roaches -- two outdoors on our deck and three indoors. Could our disposal routine be attracting these roaches? -- Cindy in Michigan

DEAR CINDY: A bit of research gave me some insight into wood roaches, and I am reasonably sure that your disposal method is not causing the infestation -- and in fact, you may not have a big problem.Wood roaches are very different from the German cockroach (a tough-to-eradicate house pest). They live and breed outdoors. Homeowners most often see them in the warmer months, between May and October, according to colonialpest.com. Their breeding season is in May and June.Most wood roaches enter through small cracks or openings in a home, but they can sometimes be carried inside with firewood or other items that are stored outdoors. They’re also attracted to lights and can sneak into the house that way.Wood roaches can’t breed indoors and usually can’t survive in an indoor environment. You can shoo them outside in most cases, rather than using pesticides to kill them. They’re actually beneficial to the woods and wild areas around your home, although they are unsightly. So, as long as your dog’s droppings aren’t causing an odor problem that bothers your neighbors or attracts other pests, your collection and storage methods are probably OK.

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¥ On April 1, 1700, English pranksters begin popularizing the annual tradition of playing April Fool’s jokes. In keeping with the fun, in 1957 the BBC reported that Swiss farmers were experiencing a re-cord spaghetti crop and showed footage of people harvesting noodles from trees.

¥ On March 29, 1806, the Great National Pike, also known as the Cumberland Road, becomes the first highway funded by the national treasury. The initial appropriation of $30,000 was made by congres-sional act and covered the first leg through the Appalachian Moun-tains to Wheeling on the Ohio River.

¥ On March 30, 1867, the U.S. government puts the finishing touches a deal to purchase Alaska. It paid Alaska’s owner, Russia, $7.2 mil-lion, or roughly 2 cents per acre of land. Among many Republicans the deal was derisively known as “Seward’s Folly,” after U.S. Secre-tary of State William H. Seward.

¥ On March 31, 1889, the Eiffel Tower is dedicated in Paris. Gustave Eiffel’s tower was greeted with skepticism from critics, who argued that it would be structurally unsound. Within a few decades the tower came to be regarded as an architectural masterpiece.

¥ On March 26, 1937, America’s first monument to a comic strip hero is unveiled in Crystal City, Texas. The 6-foot-tall, brightly col-ored concrete statue of Popeye was unveiled in Popeye Park during the city’s second annual Spinach Festival.

¥ On March 27, 1964, the strongest earthquake in American history, measuring 8.4 on the Richter scale, slams southern Alaska, creating a deadly tsunami. Some 125 people were killed and thousands injured. The tidal wave devastated towns along the Gulf of Alaska and caused carnage in British Columbia, Canada; Hawaii and the West Coast of the United States.

¥ On March 28, 1979, the worst accident in the history of the U.S. nuclear power industry begins when a pressure valve in the Unit-2 reactor at Three Mile Island in Pennsylvania fails to close. As engi-neers struggled to understand what had happened, the reactor came within less than an hour of a complete meltdown.

Make a Portable Playmat for PreschoolersI’ll bet your kids easily can map out the setting of their favorite TV series. They probably know exactly where the main characters live -- that they turn left to get to the water fountain and right to get to the stables. But how well do they know their own neighborhood?Here’s a playful way to become familiar with where they live in relationship to all the places that regularly touch their lives. It’s a portable town playmat made with an inexpensive window shade. Designed to mimic where you live, it’s personalized and perfect for indoor fun.Once it’s made, kids can spill out a basket of toys and bring their town to life. If you listen in, you might

hear that a tiger is prowling the street right next to the supermarket! Wait until he finds himself eye-to-eye with the T-rex stomping down the steps of the library. And that bright-green cowboy. Look at him ambling out of the coffee shop. Wonder which direction he’ll run?

To get started, you’ll need: --Plain white roll-down window shade from a discount store--Pencil and permanent nontoxic markers--Ruler--Acrylic paints and sponges for dabbing

Here’s the fun:First, take a walk with your young kids. Stroll down your street. Turn in various directions, discussing the outing as you go. Your conver-sation might go like this: “Let’s remember how close the post office is to the cleaners. Oh, look, the library is two whole blocks up from here. The bakery is across the street.” It’s a chance to teach that places aren’t just “out there.” They can be located.When you return, roll out the shade on the floor and sketch your community using a ruler and pencil, beginning with your home. Then, with a ruler, plot out important places in relationship to your dwelling. Color and decorate streets, buildings and other details with mark-ers. Don’t forget lakes, ponds or parks. Dip a small sponge lightly onto some acrylic paint and dab in bright colors for the water, flowers and trees. Let dry, gather small toys and let your “Our Town” play begin.To store, roll up the painted shade and set upright in a closet for another day.Extra idea: Add familiar faces to the toy pieces. Ask friends, teachers and shopkeepers if they will let you take close-up photos. Print on heavy paper, cut out the individuals, leaving an extra half-inch at the bottom to bend back and glue to the inside of a plastic bottle cap so they appear to be standing up. Now your kids will have human “players” in their drama

* It was noted A m e r i c a n science fiction author Philip K. Dick who made

the following sage observation: “Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn’t go away.”

* The first chocolate factory in the United States was established even before the states were united. Back in 1765, two enterprising men named John Hanan and James Baker chose Dorchester, Mass., as the site for their factory, which they mechanized by using waterpower.

* If you’re like the average American, you eat 23 quarts of ice cream every year.

* You might be surprised to learn that the given name of iconic Apache leader Geronimo, Goyathlay, translates as “one who yawns.” And the very name Apache isn’t what the tribe originally called itself; it’s word from the Zuni Indian language, and it means “enemy.”

* In a scant 100 years, from 1500 to 1600, the population of the city of London quadrupled in size.

* Singer and songwriter Roger Miller, best known for his hit song “King of the Road,” had a passion

for music early, even though his family was poor. When he was in grade school, he spent his weekends picking cotton so he could save up enough money to buy a guitar. After eighth grade he quit school and went to work herding cattle and riding in rodeos.

* Interestingly, the word “pudding” came into the English language from the German word “puddek,” which means “sausage.” ***Thought for the Day: “We are not afraid to entrust the American people with unpleasant facts, foreign ideas, alien philosophies and competitive values. For a nation that is afraid to let its people judge the truth and falsehood in an open market is a nation that is afraid of its people.” -- John F. Kennedy

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HELPING YOUR SELF-HELP

Although the New Year has passed, many of us are perhaps still a little behind on taking up those New Year’s resolutions we made a few short months ago. Whether it is to lose weight, cut out an unhealthy vice or commit to more time with the family, our resolutions are a reminder that our growth as human beings necessitates increased levels of self-discipline. Yet what if the issue isn’t a lack of discipline? Perhaps you’re a model of steely determination but have run out of creative ways to push yourself to newer and greater heights in 2012. The self-help section of your local bookstore is usually a fair start, but it rarely offers any ideas you haven’t already thought of. To resolve this problem, here are three “different” (but real) advice books to use as possible starting points in the quest for a better you:• Have you ever thought of yourself as someone

with unearthly powers of clairvoyance? Have you ever been described as someone who lifts the spirits of everyone around you? If so, maybe you should grab a copy of “The Lightworker’s Way: Awakening Your Spiritual Power to Know and Heal” by Dr. Doreen Virtue. This tome could be just what you need to enhance your inner telekinetic superpowers. As the book’s Amazon description helpfully outlines, you are a “lightworker” if you “feel called to heal others” and “want to resolve the world’s social and environmental problems” through “spiritual methods.”

• Or perhaps “Fancy Coffins to Make Yourself” by Dale Power is a better fit. This book’s online description hints at the morbidity of the new skill you’ll be learning. “Here’s the help you need for one of life’s most critical undertakings — making your own coffin,” it proudly declares, leaving one to muse whether the author understood his own darkly comic wordplay. Within the book’s chapters, you’ll find a wealth of detailed instructions and color photos to aid you in completing “your life’s finest accomplishment.” “Finest accomplishment” is debatable, but it is possible that it could be your final one.

• You may be saying to yourself, “Yes, these previous books sound fascinating, but how do I read them?” Well, then you might need “How to Read a Book” by Mortimer Adler and Charles Van Doren. If the issue is one of actual literacy, this book won’t help you. No, instead this 1940 volume teaches you “different reading techniques for reading practical books, imaginative literature, plays, poetry, history, science and mathematics, philosophy and social science.” What the Amazon description fails to mention is that one of its authors is an authority on another subject, too: namely, cheating at televised game shows. It’s the same Charles Van Doren who was an admitted accomplice in the rigging of outcomes on the 1959 NBC show “Twenty One.”

Not All Chest Pain Comes From the Heart

DEAR DR. DONOHUE: I am a 38-year-old woman who has a very stressful job. It is also very well-paying, so I don’t want to give it up. I think it might be giving me chest pain. The pain

comes and goes unpredictably. Sometimes I am just sitting at my desk, and I get a squeezing sensation in my chest. At other times, I had been hurrying around.I have had several EKGs, been examined by three doctors, had a stress test and a radioactive stress test. The doctors say my heart is healthy, and the chest pain could come from stress. In speaking with people I trust, I have been told to have a heart catheterization. What do you think? -- P.A.

ANSWER: None of your three doctors told you that. Don’t you think they might know more than your friends? You have to be guided by advice given to you by those who have had experience in assessing people’s complaints. There’s no pattern to your chest pain. Heart pain, in contrast, causes chest pain when a person is physically active. That pain goes when the person rests. Your kind of pain is not suggestive of a heart disorder.Your doctors have told you that your heart is healthy. You have had EKGs, stress tests and even a radioactive stress test. Those tests would have disclosed a heart problem if you had one.Furthermore, you are only 38 years old -- not an age for heart prob-lems to occur. You mention no family history of heart trouble at

early ages.With a catheterization, a thin, pliable tube is inched from a groin blood vessel to the site where the heart arteries are found. There, dye is injected so doctors can visualize the health of heart arter-ies. The doctors can spot any obstructions, like cholesterol buildup, in those arteries. It’s an amazing test. However, complications can arise from any procedure that invades the body. When the detection of heart disease can be accomplished in no other way, information from a catheterization is justified. In your case, it’s not.Stress is the most likely cause of your chest pain.Coronary artery disease is the No. 1 cause of death in most of the world’s countries. The booklet on that subject explains in detail its symptoms and its treatments. To order a copy, write: Dr. Dono-hue -- No. 101W, Box 536475, Orlando, FL 32853-6475. Enclose a check or money order (no cash) for $4.75 U.S./$6 Canada with the recipient’s printed name and address. Please allow four weeks for delivery.***DEAR DR. DONOHUE: I’ve been talked into donating blood. My hangup is that I have a fitness program that I religiously adhere to. The thought of an extended rest bothers me. How long do you have to spend recuperating after donating blood? -- A.A.

ANSWER: You’re not facing an extended recuperation after donat-ing blood. One day is enough. That sounds like too little time, but it’s sufficient. You won’t notice it.It takes a full month for your blood count to return to what it was before you donated. That slight dip in your blood count isn’t going to affect your exercise performance unless you are into marathon training.

Community GardenI signed up for a small plot in our community garden. It was a big step, going public this way. While others can grow glorious mounds of colorful flowers, my past attempts had humble results that were best relegated to pots on the porch.For the second year, the local land trust has divided up one of it properties and made small rect-angles of land available at a low cost to seniors who want to garden. I was able to select my own site -- near one of the faucets and the hose.

For those of us who don’t have a green thumb (as I apparently don’t), the land trust is holding a series of weekly gardening classes, designed to help us get the most out of our little plots of dirt.Different types of mulch, how to understand the three numbers on the labels of fertilizer, planting seedlings versus seeds, soil pH, stay-ing organic -- all are topics we’re learning about. This weekend I went to the community garden and located my plot. It’s weedy and flat, with cold, hard-looking soil. It was used last year, so I assume all the rocks are gone, but still, I wondered: How am I going to transform it into a space full of beautiful flowers?I made my decision while standing there looking at the weeds. I won’t grow flowers. I’m going to grow vegetables for the two homeless shelters near me and for the food bank. This time my attempts to succeed with a garden will be different: The land trust will provide hands-on help and advice.I hope the food bank is prepared for a deluge of carrots, beans and tomatoes.

Matilda Charles regrets that she cannot personally answer reader questions, but will incorporate them into her column whenever pos-sible.

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Is It Time to Buy a New Car?

Here come higher gas prices -- again. No one should be surprised. These things run in cycles. Yes, prices are

generally higher in spring and summer -- when we all need more gas for vacation -- and go down in the winter. If you don’t get good gas mileage, consider whether it’s time to buy a more efficient, economical vehicle. You won’t be alone. The sale of small and compact cars has increased in the past year. One automaker reported that sales of its small cars increased by 40 percent. Another reported an increase of 43 percent.Decide, too, whether the vehicle you buy should be considered your “last” one. In other words, buy as though the vehicle will

be the last one you’ll ever own -- and then drive it for the length of its useful life. The idea is to keep driv-ing the car long after it’s paid off. Keep up with all scheduled maintenance to extend the life of the car. A payment-free vehicle is a nice thing to own. Besides not making a hefty monthly payment, the older a ve-hicle is, the lower the taxes and insurance.If you’re going to trade your car in, invest in a detail-ing package so it looks its best. At the very least, run it through a carwash and spring for the wax.These basics of saving on gas apply to whatever type of vehicle you own:--Keep your vehicle tuned. Not being at peak perfor-mance means it is going to use more fuel. Keep an eye on the tire pressure as well.

--Plan and combine your errand trips around town. --Carpool, if you can, or take public transportation at least a few days a week.For more ideas on saving on the cost of fuel, see the website by the U.S. Department of Energy: www.fueleconomy.gov/feg/gasprices. You’ll find informa-tion on hybrids and electric cars, alternative fuels, miles per gallon, notes from other consumers, tips on choosing an efficient vehicle, a side-by-side compari-son of vehicles, and information about the new labels required on vehicles. Besides the estimated mpg, the new label has to disclose how much money you can likely save over five years, the greenhouse rating, the annual cost of fuel and the smog rating.