an experimental place

an experimental place

Ant & Flea and the Castle of Prose

tom made this ©2010

Ant &

Flea and the C

astle of Prose

There was once a child named Flea

Who climbed to the top of the tallest tree

To see if he could see the sea.

He climbed and climbed for an hour or such

Before meeting an ant who offered him lunch

And told him a story or three.

The first tale that the ant told Flea

Was about an owl who lived in the tree

He'd lived there for a hundred years

Since an acorn watered by the tears

Of a beautiful princess grew

As high as a huge great tree can do.

Now those tears are a tale, said the tiny warrior

But that is not this and a narrative spoiler

So, four magic tears and a forest grew

But four magic more made a river flood through

It covered the land and turned the earth blue

So Owl flew to the source of the dreadful dew.

The owl swooped down with Flea on his wing

And circled the princess who did woefully sing

"My Love lies below in a watery grave

Sent there to rot by a silvery knave

And until my ring lies along with my king

My tears count the time of the sad song I sing".

The animals sat up high on the hill

As the water below continued to fill

Their homes on the ground (and up in the trees).

The water lapped gently on sad royal knees

And Owl flew higher still carrying Flea

Before diving groundward at perilous speed…

This is it I shall die, thought Flea as they fell

The earth rushing up in a sickening grey swell

And then through & beyond, oh wise Owl's feathers!

Kept him warm in the water, "such terrible weather

They have below sea" noted Flea "By the way,

Owls can't swim underwater can they?"

"It's called 'willing suspense' came the learned reply

Either that or I'm afraid you have already died

From a terrible fall high up in a tree

Now are you shopping for coffins or coming with me?"

So they glode through the water and twiddled their toes

Until they arrived at the Castle of Prose.

Down swooped Owl over hyphens aglow

Where syntactical errors filled row upon row

Exclamatory shadows the symbols did throw

On semantic mysteries below

Truisms made towers and grammatical flowers

Bloomed large midst the golden fresco.

‘T'was a forest of visual rhyme

Built high on the seabed abandoned by time

Glittering wordplay and dead poetry

Pillars and statues of the literati.

There were goldfish surrounding an alphabet moat thing

And they bowed to their silver fish king.

He arrived with a carriage of foam

And a fanfare of cod on trombone

The minnows sang odes

While the drawbridge arose

And armed frogs stood atop all the castle's full stops

As seaweed sang shanties below.

"What are we to do?" cried Flea

Feeling the burden of Responsibility

"Well I see a query, regarding high-tea

And the prince we must free" Owl decreed

"If we cunningly flee before the King sees

Then we will be heroes dear Flea."

"What?" said Flea as they floated or swam

He knew not what they were

Nor what where they am.

He was very confused, but before that he knew

They had crawled through a "Q"

And were hidden in "Zoo"

As they crawled between "secret" and "passage"

Flea saw in the shadow of a "SHADOW" was wedged

A tiny small girl of an uncertain age

Who squealed when she saw them, and flew in a rage

"Awful Big Brother!” she cried in distress

"What am I doing here? Why am I in such bother?"

The two were aghast at Flea's golden-haired sister

But her eyes told the pair there was no need to kiss her

She glared at a them both and said "What's going on?"

"I've been chased by a police-fish with a long pointy tongue!"

Suddenly a frog with a pike turned the corner

And all three leapt through some handy "fauna"

As they slid down the "u" Flea puzzled away

This really was quite a remarkable day

What bothered him most was not so much her pique

But that only this morning she spoke baby speak

Da da, ma mee and gurgledy goo

No conjugations, no hullabaloo!

Flea forgot all about it as he met with a bump

And the three hit the floor with a terrible thump

On their rump, in pitch black, just the light of their eyes

Let them know that the words in the walls were all sighs

A dark gloomy prison, "I'm terribly sorry"

Said Flea, feeling horrid, "I hope no-one's worried."

Flea's sister was crying. "I want my dummy

I'm just a wee baby, I'm scared without mummy."

Owl lit up the room, with enormous big eyes

"Don't be frightened, I'm Owl, stay right by my side."

"Snuggle up in my feathers, they're terribly good

"At scaring off baddies and blokes with big hoods."

She managed "I'm Jewel…" before screaming the scream

Which made them all notice the skeletal scene

That hung from the wall, and they all shut their eyes

The dark being darker, and dreading surprise

They kept them shut tight 'till a small voice enquired

"Now this can't be right, are you all feeling tired?"

"Have you all gone to bed? It's too early to!

"There are baddies to fight and a prince to rescue"

With eyes still clamped shut, Flea started to shout

"Who's that? Are you armed? Have you come to help out?"

"It's me," said Ant, creeping in through the lock.

He flicked on the light switch to give them a shock.

"You're miles off course..." Ant pointed out

"I just want to go home!" said Jewel with a pout.

"You're not having fun, and your brother's the culprit

"How often that happens in the family outfit"

Sighed Ant smiling wryly, "OK then son

"You're in charge really so what's to be done?"

"I'm in charge?" squeaked Flea, quite disbelieving

"It's all up to you" said Ant, "you are sleeping,

All of this here is simply you dreaming

Inside your head is out here thus seeming."

And suddenly Flea was as big as a house

Then equally quick he was small as a mouse.

Even owl was confused and scratched his head

And suggested to Jewel it was time for bed.

Flea dreamt Jewel home with a bowl of ice-cream

"It's all even stranger if I just have to dream."

Then in order to make himself feel a bit braver

He wore silver armour and the pose of a saviour

Off they all marched up a flight made of "Snowing"

Each thinking the other knew where they were going

They climbed up a blizzard going higher and higher

Until they ended up lost at the tip of a spire

With words that went all of the way round the wall

Which Flea, though he tried, could not read at all.

Panic arrived and ran round up and down

Turning each letter the other way round.

"I wish I could read letters better" wailed Flea

"But I've only learnt half, from A through to T

These curious 'X's with their E's and IT's

What are they about? Where do they lead?"

Ant shrugged all six shoulders, "I'm only an ant

What do I know, I'm no literary savant."

Then as Owl rotated came a sound at the door

As it flew off its hinges and fell to the floor

To reveal in their glory the royal fish guard

And a bespectacled chub with a calling card.

"His highness would like you to join him for tea

Either that or we kill you, please follow me?"

Owl whispered to Flea "I was going to say 'damn!'

But I've just realized this is part of your plan."

"What plan of mine? They are threatening to kill us"

Squeaked Flea in a terror, "It's an horrible mess."

"oh!" said Owl in a monotone

For the dream seemed over as the party were flown

Up to the tallest meanest tower

Dragged all the way by dark duck power

"That is to say, um, …er, oh"

Owl looked away and stubbed his toe

They were pushed inside a dark stateroom

Where a silver glow lit up the gloom.

"Welcome Flea, my nemesis

A cup of tea, some choccie bics?"

The evil knave enquired of them

So Flea, to be polite, took ten.

And between nibbles on his digestive

He made his sword all aggressive

And sat back picking crumbs from armour

Whilst the sword was causing some palaver

As snickety snack the fish guard fell

He took one more and prompted "Well?"

"Hmmn" said the king, who looked incensed

"Your sword is good at disembowelment

Could I borrow it one day do you think?"

But before Flea could think to blink

The silver knave was on his brink,

And both fell rolling in the drink

The tea today was Earl Grey (hooray)

So Flea took the initiative straight away

Grinding tea-leaves in his fishy eyes

He called for help but got odd replies

Squawks and clucks from down the hall

Just three fat chickens chained up the wall

Flea ran to help his poultry friends

Who were chained with letters end to end

Their wings were clipped with "final calls"

And around their feet were "IRON" balls,

Each neck was noosed with a golden "choker"

The walls were thick with the rules of poker!

Silverfish appeared cackling "Be afraid!"

But Flea knew this was evil stock and trade

He shouted back "Smelly Socks!"

And hit him with a healthy "Thwock"

The baddy crumpled to the ground

And Flea put the handy "Thwock" back down.

There were no locks, there were no keys

And what with Silverfish on his knees

Being "thwock"'ed a lot it took an hour

To find the book that held the power.

It was a small thick square affair

Called "Dictionary" from the "LIB/r/ary"

Out the book flew wonderful words

Words like "Neurotic", "Machismo" and "Nerds"

Flea also found some words that he knew

"Honey" was funny but the best was "Undo"

Quick as a flash it was all right as rain

But Ant said he'd rather be a Chicken again.

"It was nice being large" Ant said with a frown

But Owl and Flea weren't taking it down

They were staring instead at a man with a crown

And platform shoes and a princely manner

Feet apart and a bit of a swagger

But suave and good looking with plenty of glamour

He stayed for five minutes of thank you's and tea,

With a quick round of "thwock" before taking his leave.

Then alone in a pond was a single wet male

No one around to believe his tale

They would call it nonsense and him “airy fairy”

And they'd laugh at his miniscule dictionary.

Yet high up above at the top of a tree

An owl looked down on a child named Flea

"… That was the first tale that Ant knew,

But whatever became of the other two?"

"It's time for sleep so just wait and see."

Said a small voice also looking down at Flea.