are you the victim of “meeting expectation”?
TRANSCRIPT
Are you the victim of “Meeting expectation”?
By: Anshu E-Mail: [email protected]: www.dreampinch.com
“I failed to meet the expectation.” This sentence is the most horrible one, which is given by almost each one who goes through the emotional breakdown after failure. In fact, some people try to end up their life because they feel that they failed to meet their parent’s expectation, they failed to meet their family’s expectation, or they failed to meet their own expectation.
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So what does it mean “failed to meet the expectation.”? Is this the ultimate goal for which god send us on this earth – to meet someone’s expectation, so when we become unable to do so, we decide to quit the life.
Doesn’t we overestimates meeting the expectation.
We took it as life and death issue. Kids generally overburdened with the
emotion that their parents did so much for them so it’s their duty to fulfil parent’s expectation.
I know these are unseen expectations which exist in our mind without our consent but isn’t it insensible to end the life just because one failed to meet the expectation. So what’s wrong with the meaning of meeting expectation?
We, the parents, want to provide each and every resource to our kids and in return want them always be on the top. Sometimes it’s said expectation or sometimes it’s unsaid, but it has become a kind of norm of each parent. Grade less than A+ is unacceptable. We do not concentrate that what our kid is learning, but we want to see their report card full of marks and grades rather than the real learning.
In reality, marks never make a good person but knowledge makes great personalities. So somewhere this misconception “marks define the success” is killing our kid’s confidence.
It’s an unsaid truth of society that if kids are doing what their parents want that means they are fulfilling expectations, Even if children want to do something else.
Few months ago a girl chooses to suicide even if she got great rank in IIT entrance exam. She must be happy that she fulfilled her parent’s expectations then why she took such horrible decision? The reason was she never wanted to choose engineering stream. She loved studying geography but her parents wanted her to be an IIT tagged engineer. So she succeed to meet the so called expectation of her parents but failed to meet the expectation of her heart’s choice, her real expectation.Is there any person in this world who never failed? So how
can think that you could break the expectation if failed? In fact, if you are failing means you are moving ahead. You are not living with the fear that you may fail. Also when you fail, you come to know about your shortcomings. So how you can misinterpret it that you failed in one task so you failed in meeting your parents’ expectations.
Few days before one student attempted suicide because he failed to get more marks than his neighbourhood friend. His parents would get ashamed because of his lesser mark. Isn’t it a stupidity? Are these marks precious than life? It’s not about whose fault. Point is that Fault is in our thinking. We think that we are getting good mark so we will be able to survive life in a better way. We will be able to earn good money. This is really a wrong conception.
Education is just not to earn money after studying 19-20 years but it is a way to help us to choose the way what we want, where we want to go, what we want to make ourself. You can find many stories of IITiens who quit their job and choose to do what they want so isn’t it better to take the efforts to know the life’s target in early stage and work on that rather than spending so many years on getting into IITs.
It’s just an example but it interprets the real scenario of the world.
Do you really want to know that what does it mean by meeting the expectation of oneself, parents, family and ultimately of the god?
Our first and foremost duty is giving hundred percent to the things what we are doing and what we love to do. Our concern should be to give full efforts without thinking about the end result. Without thinking does not mean without pouring your mind into your work. It means you have to give full efforts from your heart, mind and body. At the end, you should have the feeling, “I gave 100% with my honesty. Now whatever would be the result, I am ready to accept that.” If you are doing this, you are meeting the expectation.
You cannot give your 100% to the work, which you do not like. You cannot realise someone else’s dream with full proficiency but you can give your each and every effort to the thing which you love by heart.
So knowing your heart, what it wants, is meeting the expectation.
Initially, it feels like crazy or unrealistic what your heart says but if your heart denies to give up on that then it’s time to listen to it and work on it.
Why am I talking about this point? Answer is, in life there will always be a clash that what you want from yourself and what people around (can include your parents, family, neighbours etc) want of you.
So you have to sit and be clam to think about all the circumstances because you have one life and you can’t do justice with it unless you are not doing what your heart want.
Being honest to oneself, being honest to the work, being honest to the life is meeting expectation.
Because you can cheat your parents, you can cheat to the world in disguise that you are working very hard for your work but you are the only one who can do truthful self assessment.
So, if you are truthful to yourself then you are meeting the expectations.
You are listening to your heart. You are honest to yourself. You know your in and out. And you are doing what you want, so why to worry about the result. Success will surely be yours, sooner or later. Go ahead you are meeting God’s expectation too.
Beyond dreams, beyond the goal, beyond hard work, beyond passion the most important thing in life is being happy.
Without if, else, but you know how to be happy and above that you know to keep people happy, you are meeting expectations of oneself as well as humanity.
Being happy is the god’s greatest gift but alas every one of us does not have the capacity to hold it.
Every one of us in this world is for some purpose. Maybe it is small or a big.
So do you know what your life dream is? What you want from life.
If you know and you are working on it, congrats you are meeting life’s expectation.
It’s any parent’s hidden wish that their children should be one the top of the world and the happiest one in this world.
But sometimes they bound the results with their way. Example: you will be happy in your life if you will
become a doctor. It’s totally a wrong way. A bird cannot be happy when he is swimming or a fish
cannot be happy when she is climbing. Can’t imagine my statement. Right, I too cannot, so
how our kids can realise the things for which they do not have talent. They have talent but may not be of what you wanted.
So it’s a mutual responsibility of children and parents that they should open their heart to let know the other one, what they wanted.
It’s really tough to let the children do what they want when we our self spent our whole life according to someone else’s choice. But at the same time, we are the only one who can understand what it meant to live life own way because we too wanted to live the life our way. So It’s the time to meet your child’s expectation and to be a real friend of your child.Good - bad, happy - sad, gain - loss, success - failure. It
is nature’s cycle. So don’t worry if you got a failure. It’s just an indication that you have to work hard or you
have to take some other way-plan B. But just because you failed, you can’t quit life. You can’t end life.
In life, there are enormous opportunities. Losing in one doesn’t mean you will lose all the opportunities. You just have to sit, work again and have to have the patience to see that success in life.
Each person in this world is different. Evaluation between two person’s work is fine but comparing two personalities on one aspect is a sin because maybe one is good in communication and the another one is good in painting so you cannot compare both on communication skill and can define the second one as useless. Note : Parents don’t compare your kid with other kids and rather spent time in recognising your kid’s talent and growing and improving that.It’s very hard to accept the word “I Cannot”. We always
have a fear that what people would say if they will know that “I cannot ....” But knowing own reality and showing same to the world is the biggest courage so if you have that guts, you are meeting the expectation.
Because rather than following hard race you took courage to deny and choose a different way. Not everyone had that courage. Congratulations you are few of those personalities who are brave enough.
Are you also living with the wrong interpretation of meeting the expectations? If you have any story about “meeting the expectation”, Share it with me. Maybe it can change someone’s life.
Send me your mail at: [email protected]
