ch 9: foundations of interpersonal communication (slide 1) chapter 9: foundations of interpersonal...

CH 9: Foundations of Interpersonal Communication (slide 1)

Chapter 9: Foundations of Interpersonal Communication

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Relationship Stages

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Relationships are created and constructed by individuals

A single relationship actually contains multiple relationships

Relationships occur in stages developing toward intimacy and dissolution


Relationship Stages (cont.)

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1. Six stage modelStage One: Contact – first impressions

Perceptual Interactional

Stage Two: Involvement – sense of mutual connection develops

Experimenting and testing Increase time together



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Stage Three: Intimacy – commit to establishing a relationship; become a unit, an identifiable pair

Talk about relationship Share social networks Interpersonal commitment Social bonding

Stage Four: Relationship deterioration – weakening of bonds

Intrapersonal dissatisfaction Interpersonal deterioration



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Stage Five: Repair Intrapersonal repair Interpersonal repair

Stage Six: Dissolution – breaking bonds; see selves as individuals rather than two halves of a pair

Interpersonal separation Social or public separation


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2. Movement in the stages

Exit arrows Vertical arrows Self-reflexive

arrows



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3. Turning points Significant events Positive or negative Vary culturally

4. Relationship license Permission to break a rule Reciprocal or non-reciprocal Usually implied


Relationship Theories

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1. Attraction theory Similarity

Similarity principle Complementarity

Proximity Reinforcement Physical attractiveness and personality Socioeconomic and educational status Reciprocity of liking


Relationship Theories (cont.)

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2. Relationship rules theory Friendship Romantic Family

What you can talk about How you can talk about something Who you can talk about it to

Workplace



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3. Relationship dialectics theory – tensions between opposite motives or desires Open (see other people) and closed (exclusivity) Autonomy (independence) and connection

(intimacy) Novelty (new experiences) and predictability

(stability)



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3. Relationship dialectics theory (cont.) Strategies to balance tensions

Accept imbalance Exit relationship Rebalance your life



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4. Social penetration theory – what you talk about changes with level of intimacy Breadth – range of topics Depth – inner personality or core of person Depenetration – decrease sharing as a

relationship declines



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5. Social exchange theory – maximize relational profits Profit = cost – reward

Reward – something it costs you to obtain (money, status, love, information, goods, services)

Costs – things you would normally avoid Profit – when you subtract the costs from the rewards



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5. Social exchange theory (cont.) Comparison level – your idea or expectations of

what rewards you should get in a relationship Comparison level for alternatives – level of

rewards in current relationship compared to another relationship



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6. Equity theory Builds on social exchange theory Equitable relationship – your rewards equal your

partner’s Underbenefitted Overbenefitted



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7. Politeness theory Two people develop a relationship when each

respects, contributes to, and acknowledges the positive and negative face needs of the other and deteriorates when they don’t

Politeness relaxes as intimacy increases


Relationship Communication

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1. Communicating in developing relationships Be nice Communicate Be open Give assurances Share joint activities Be positive Focus on self-improvement Be empathic



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2. Communicating in deteriorating relationships Communication patterns

Withdrawal Decline in self-disclosure Deception Positive messages decrease and negative messages

increase



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2. Communicating in deteriorating relationships (cont.) Strategies of disengagement

Positive tone to preserve relationship Justification to explain breakup Deception De-escalation to reduce intensity



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2. Communicating in deteriorating relationships (cont.) Dealing with a breakup

Break loneliness-depression cycle Take time out Bolster self-esteem Remove uncomfortable relationship symbols Be mindful of your relationship patterns



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3. Communicating in relationship repair Interpersonal repair

R – Recognize the problem

E – Engage in productive conflict resolution

P – Pose possible solutions

A – Affirm each other

I – Integrate solutions into normal behavior

R – Risk



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3. Communicating in relationship repair (cont.) Intrapersonal repair

Remember punctuation

ch 9: foundations of interpersonal communication (slide 1) chapter 9: foundations of interpersonal...

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