College Essay Writing Tips

Do use a good HOOK to get your reader involved immediately! Hook Ideas for a story about a shark attack: Original boring lead: I fell out of the boat. I saw a shark. Reaction Lead: (describe a reaction to what is

happening) I was a motionless corpse in a churning sea, and the

only thing more terrifying than the shark coming at me, was the paralyzing fear that had taken over my body.

Dialogue Lead: (start with a quote) “If you don’t hurry up and throw me a line, I’m as

good as shark chum!” I screeched to the boat captain.

Do use a good HOOK to get your reader involved immediately! Action Lead: (use descriptive words and

strong verbs to show what is happening) Like a squirming, angry serpent, the boat

swallowed me, then spit me out into the shark-infested sea.

Characterization Lead – illuminate the person through action, dialogue, and a few choice details

The shark’s eyes were dark and lifeless. In its sleek design, I sensed no humanity, just the perfect eating machine. Suddenly, a voice from deep inside me rose to the surface and screamed, “You are not going to die like this!”

Do use a good HOOK to get your reader involved immediately! Setting Lead – describe the time and place

where the action takes place It was daybreak, and I surfaced from my dive

only to discover I was all alone in the middle of the ocean. Miles and miles of endless sea stretched on forever with nothing in sight except a deadly gray fin slowly circling me.

Allusion Lead – a reference to another person, place, or thing

It was like a scene out of the movie Jaws, I saw the shark in the water, and said to the captain, “We need a bigger boat.”

Do use a variety of sentences

Simple sentences: one subject and one predicate (action)

EX: Mary studied all week long for her Algebra test on Friday.

Compound sentences: two subjects and two predicates joined by a coordinating conjunction (FANBOYS)

Mary studied all week long for her Algebra test on Friday, so she made the highest grade in the class.

Do use a variety of sentences

FANBOYS join two simple sentences that are connected in meaning.

For, and, nor, but, or, yet, soNote: there is always a comma

before the coordinating conjunction

Do use a variety of sentences

Complex sentences – have a dependent and independent clause

They have subordinating conjunctions in them:

after, although, as, because, before, even though, if, since, unless, until, while

After Mary aced her math test, she felt really proud of herself.

Mary felt really proud of herself after she aced her math test.

Do use a variety of sentences

Note: When the subordinating conjunction comes at the beginning of the sentence, place a comma between the dependent/independent clause.

After Mary aced her math test, she felt really proud of herself.

However, when the subordinating conjunction is in the middle, there is no comma.

Mary felt really proud of herself after she aced her math test.

Do use a variety of sentences

Use appositives to combine two simple sentences.

Mary brother’s car is the envy of my friends. It is a sporty, red convertible with bucket seats.

My brother's car, a sporty, red convertible with bucket seats, is the envy of my friends.

An appositive or appositive phrase renames a noun.

Do improve word choice by replacing these words with more vivid synonyms: A LOT

GREAT VERY ALSO MANY YOU BAD NICE GOT YOUR(S) BIG FUN REAL REALLY GET STUFF GOOD

Do use appropriate transition devices to connect your sentences:

TO ADD OR SHOW SEQUENCEagain, also, and, and then, besides, equally important, finally, first, further, furthermore, in addition, in the first place, last, moreover, next, second, still, too

TO COMPAREalso, in the same way, likewise, similarly

TO CONTRASTalthough, and yet, but, but at the same time, despite, even so, even though, for all that, however, in contrast, in spite of, nevertheless, notwithstanding, on the contrary, on the other hand, regardless, still, though, yet

TO GIVE EXAMPLES OR INTENSITYafter all, an illustration of, even, for example, for instance, indeed, in fact, it is true, of course, specifically, that is, to illustrate, truly

Do use appropriate transition devices to connect your sentences:

TO INDICATE PLACEabove, adjacent to, below elsewhere, farther on, here, near, nearby, on the other side, opposite to, there, to the east, to the left

TO INDICATE TIMEafter a while, afterward, as long as, as soon as, at last, at length, at that time, before, earlier, formerly, immediately, in the meantime, in the past, lately, later, meanwhile, now, presently, shortly, simultaneously, since, so far, soon, subsequently, then, thereafter, until, until now, when

TO REPEAT, SUMMARIZE, OR CONCLUDEall in all, altogether, as has been said, in brief, in conclusion, in other words, in particular, in short, in simpler terms, in summary, on the whole, that is, therefore, to put it differently, to summarize

TO SHOW CAUSE OR EFFECTaccordingly, as a result, because, consequently, for this purpose, hence, otherwise, since, then, therefore, thereupon, thus, to this end, with this object

Do edit and revise your essay looking for convention errors like:Fragments – incomplete

sentences – either missing a subject or verb

My puppy with the dark, brown eyes. (Did what? – the action (verb) in missing)

Running through the misty, luscious garden. (Who was running through the garden?)

Do edit and revise your essay looking for convention errors like:

Run-ons – two or more sentences treated as one

My brother called me last night after dinner he told me he would be coming to Houston in two more weeks.

Do edit and revise your essay looking for convention errors like:Homophones-words that

sound alike but have different meanings

its/it’s its – possessive pronoun

The cat bit its tail.it’s (it is) – contraction Look!

It’s the cat that bit its tail.

Do edit and revise your essay looking for convention errors like: More Homophones- their/there/they’re their – possessive pronoun Please

give them back their sweaters. there – adverb Put the sweaters over

there. they’re - They’re going to school with

their new sweaters they’re (they are) contraction

Do edit and revise your essay looking for convention errors like:Usage errors in grammar, verb

tense, subject-verb agreement, and passive voice

Typical grammar errors – After the lightning strike, Jason ran

quick into the building.quick should be quickly because it

is an adverb describing to what extent Jason ran.

Do edit and revise your essay looking for convention errors like:

Jane and Mary went to a movie together. We really had a great time.

we should be they – incorrect pronoun replacement for Jane and Mary

Do edit and revise your essay looking for convention errors like:Passive voice:Books are read by Mary all the time.Active voice:Mary reads books all the time.In a sentence using active voice, the subject of the sentence

performs the action expressed in the verb.If you want to change a passive-voice sentence to active

voice, find the agent in a "by the..." phrase, or consider carefully who or what is performing the action expressed in the verb. Make that agent the subject of the sentence, and change the verb accordingly. Sometimes you will need to infer the agent from the surrounding sentences which provide context.

Ex: Passive - Mistakes were made. (by?)Active – We made mistakes.

Do edit and revise your essay looking for convention errors like: Capitalization Rules Proper nouns – names of people and important things

Mrs. Lukish but not the teacherKlein Collins High School but not the high school

Proper adjectives – Mexican food, Celtic music, French pastry Titles – Dr. George, (but not: the doctor)

President Reagan, (but not: the president) Reverend Jones, (but not: the reverend) Uncle John (but not: my uncle)

Book titles – To Kill a Mockingbird (but not: articles in the middle) Holidays: Christmas but not: seasons (spring, winter, fall) Geographical locations – the Northwest

(but not: I’m traveling northwest on I-45) City, State: Houston, TX In letters: Dear Frank, Sincerely, Very truly, First word in a quote: She said, “Go to the game after school today.”

Do edit and revise your essay looking for convention errors like: Comma Rules Items in a series – The boy likes baseball, football, golf, and basketball. Two or more adjectives: the pretty, happy puppy Dates: August 30, 2010 City/State: Spring, Texas Compound sentence: Mary used to eat hamburgers for lunch, but she now she

eats hot dogs. Complex sentence: Although my sister is younger than me, she is always telling

me what to do. Dialogue Frankie said, “It’s your turn to stand in line.” “It’s your turn to stand in line,” Frankie said. “It’s your turn,” Frankie said, “to stand in line.” Friendly letter: Dear Frankie, Closing of letter: Very truly, Noun of address: Frankie, are you going to the football game? Introductory words: Yes, I will be at the party.

Do edit and revise your essay looking for convention errors like:

For all convention rules and more, visit the following web site:

http://owl.english.purdue.edu/owl/section/1/5/