THE TURNING POINT

Edita Villaroman John 10:10; Revelation 3:20

One night, I saw myself as I really was: totally self-controlled and self-reliant.

s far as I could remember, I was a very dedicated and

disciplined student during my elementary years. So when I graduated from elementary with the highest honors, I had been fully convinced that hard and honest work always paid.

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I carried that attitude into high school. Despite the stiffer competition, I managed to always place third in my classes from first up to third year. Of course, I was not contented with just being third in my class. So during my fourth year, I tripled my efforts. It was during this year that I was invited to attend a series of Bible studies by some of my classmates especially, Jane Galazo and Elizabeth Reyes.

Although I didn’t really enjoy those Bible studies, I was truly fascinated by the dedication of our Bible Study leader. She was a busy housewife but she came to school consistently just to talk about Christ. It was from her that I first learned about the need to accept Christ personally into one’s life.

Eventually, with my usual diligent efforts, I graduated as salutatorian in high school. This fact confirmed my conviction that hard, honest work really paid. With this firm belief, I set my ways confidently to college.

The Problem

My first three years in college-- at the UNIVERSITY OF THE PHILIPPINES, were very rewarding. Through my usual self-discipline, I got above-average grades in most of my subjects.

I was in my third year when I met Bolet Lopez. From the first time we met, she always talked about Christ-- and how He was working in her life then... Again, I was fascinated by a person’s love and dedication for Christ. Just like those two former classmates and Bible Study leader in high school, Bolet (who was also a consistent college scholar in UP) had something different, which I did not have then. Verily, they exuded a kind of joy and peace I could not understand. And how I longed to have that joy and peace!

A Tentative Solution

Bolet invited the Lord Jesus into her heart when she was in high school. And since then, Christ has always worked miraculously in and through her life.

ONCE MORE, I was challenged to accept Jesus Christ in my own life. Then, I had known: To accept Christ in my life was to receive Him as my Lord and Master- to yield, submit and surrender my will, my total life to his control. Otherwise, He would not come into my life. In short, the Spirit of God wanted to be invited as the President of my life, not simply as a resident in my life.

For the first time, I had seen myself as I really was: totally self-controlled and self-reliant. And my obsession for high grades had always been controlling my life.

The problem had also become very clear: I was very unhappy and restless. And I wanted the joy and peace that Bolet possessed. The solution had been very clear too: If I would surrender my obsession for high grades to Christ’s control-- and invite Him to come into my life as the absolute Boss of my life, He would come in to give me that lasting joy and peace.

An Experiment Of Faith

With the above conviction, I decided to take a simple experiment of faith-- one night, before sleeping. Without even closing my eyes, I invited His Spirit to live in my heart. Silently, I talked with Him this way: “Christ, I want Your Spirit to come

This article was published at the Lord’s Trumpet Magazine in June, 1993.

into my life. But I know You won’t come in, unless I am willing to surrender my total life to You. I had always controlled my life in the past. And right now, I‘m not happy and contented. Hence,I want You to take over as Lord, Jesus. So that I can have that joy and peace, which I can see in those who claim to be indwelt by Your Spirit...”

After the above prayer, I fell into a deep sleep. When I woke up the next day, I remembered I had a scheduled major test on that day. But I wondered why I did not feel anxious, unlike in the past when I had always felt tense every time I had to take an examination. Then I remembered: Christ had come into my heart the night before!

That revolutionary incident happened forty three years ago. And many things had happened in the years that followed that revealed more of the attributes of this God-Spirit who has continuously indwelt my heart up to now. So after all those years, what is my final conclusion now?

My Conclusion!

THIS IS MY CONCLUSION: As long as I allow this indwelling Spirit of God to lead, inspire and empower my thoughts, words and actions, I always experience joy and peace that the world could never give. However,

whenever I choose to manage my own life, whenever I worship or enjoy anyone or anything more than the Lord Jesus, whenever I vainly claim anything or anyone as my own, whenever I depend on my natural talents and resources in doing even His ideal plans in my life, I automatically lose that joy and peace. Thus, although I am still a hard worker now, this Resident Manager-Spirit is constantly teaching me to work only for Him, and to rely totally on Him.

In other words, I possess everything when I am not obsessed with anything except with this desire to know the Lord more-- and experience more of His Lordship and reality in my life. For as I come to know and express Him more as such, I come to love and trust Him more-- and I desire more to introduce Him as a loving, caring and personal God to my relatives, friends and acquaintances.

Truly, this Manager wants only to give the best to His children. He said that He has come that we may have life and have it to the full. Yes, He is truly capable of giving the best to those who trust Him absolutely; even through trials, problems and limitations!

Indeed, as this Resident Boss expects me to do His perfect will, which is usually contrary to my selfish and natural whims and desires-- He also provides me His Resurrection Power to enable me to obey Him!

My Recommendations

After more than four decades of having the Lord in my heart, I can assure you: He is an excellent leader and provider!

Verily, this wise, loving, and gracious God wants to share all of His Riches with you. Whatever you give up for His sake is nothing-- as compared to the priceless gain of knowing and experiencing Him and His unlimited and eternal Riches.

So why not talk to Him now? Do not put this off for tomorrow. You have nothing to lose by doing this! Just be honest with Him and humbly present your doubts, inadequacies, and weaknesses before Him. Surely, you can rely on His supernatural ability to overcome those hang-ups and limitations in you-- once His Spirit indwells and fills your very being.

And like me, you

will never be sorry nor disappointed that you invited the Lord Jesus into your heart-- as you continually enjoy and experience that abundant life which He promises to those whom He indwells and rules... John 10:10.

EDITA VILLAROMAN is the Steward-Directress of the NEW MAN’S LAST DAYS MINISTRIES FOUNDATION, INC. , which ministers to the total needs of the total man, through maximizing the total quality of life and environment-- in as many morally, mentally, socially, and/or economically depressed communities in the Philippines, that God will permit-- during these critical days… This Vision was developed from her ten-year management of the NEW MAN LEARNING CENTER, a Day Care Center in Baguio, which provided a holistic education to pre-school aged children-- at whatever tuition fees their parents/guardians could afford-- from 1985 to 1995... Esther 4:14; John 9:4; 2 Cor. 9:8.

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