date! (a4) workbook - student workbook (32)

8/12/2019 Date! (A4) Workbook - Student Workbook (32)

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DATE! THE COMPLETE HOME STUDY COURSE- WORKBOOK

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http://date-course.com/


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DATE! THE COMPLETE HOME STUDY COURSECopyright 2012 Love Systems, Inc.

All Rights Reserved


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EXERCISE 1 - PR IOR DATES

In the space below, write out how your last date (or two) went. This wil l be an important refer-

ence as you work through this program.

EXERCISE 2 - SELF-DIAGNOSIS

Look at Exercise 1 and write out the points in your dates where you feel you made mistakes

or could have done something better. It is important to learn to diagnose your own mistakes.

If you are unsure at this point, take your best guess. The idea is to get you thinking critically

about your dates.


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EXERCISE 5 - FUTURE ADVENTURE PROJECTIONS

Future adventure projections are meant to be fun and flirty. In the space below, write out a

couple of your own you can use. Turn to the section on Setting Up the Date in Textbook 1 for

examples.

1)

2)

EXERCISE 6 - ASKING HER OUT

In the space below, follow the structure laid out and write a cheat sheet for your phone call.

This wil l be a firm framework for you to start from.

1) Callback humor:

2) Interesting story:

3) Statement of interest:

4) Comfort story:

5) Statement of interest:


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EXERCISE 7 - MAINTAINING INFORMALITY

In the space below, write out the locations or activities of your last date.

Last Date:

Ex. 1) Drinks at a pub - watched a band, cheap cover at the door - Informal

Ex. 2) Dinner at restaurant - three-course meal, bottle of wine, two hours - Too Formal

1)

2)

3)

4)

Breaking down your previous date, assess what parts you think were too formal for a first date

and which parts you think worked well.

Now, write out a new date. You can keep elements of your previous date if you think they are

informal enough.

1)

2)

3)

4)

Go over your l ist and think through not only the venue, but also what you will be doing at the

venue and how much youll be spending. Is your date sti l l informal?

After your next date, write out the locations and activities and re-examine if they were too in-

tense for a first date. Keep what works and change what doesnt.


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EXERCISE 8 - TIME, PLACE, AND DAY

In the chart below, write the times that are good/bad to contact or go on date with your num-

bers. You can also cross out times that dont fit into your schedule as well.

Sunday Monday Tuesday Wednesday Thursday Friday Saturday

Girl 1

Girl 2

Girl 3

A chart like this will also help keep track of the days you take specific girls on specific dates

and the space between them.

EXERCISE 9 - SENSUAL DATES IDEAS

Sensual dates are memorable dates. Can you think of two dates that inspire the senses? If your

date is unique it wil l stand out more. Refer to page 31 of the Types of Dates chapter in

Textbook 1 for examples.

1)

2)

For each of those dates, write out a brief outline of how you would pitch them to a woman

when asking her out.( If you need help refer to page 23 of the Setting up the Date chapter

in Textbook 1. )

1)

2)


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EXERCISE 10 - INSPIRING HER SENSES

Creating an anchoring experience for her will keep you on her mind. In the space below, create

three anchoring experiences that you can slip into any date. (For examples, turn to page 31 of

Types of Dates in Textbook 1.)

1)

2)

3)

Look at your examples and jot down what part of your date plan these could fit into. (Turn to

page 28 of Textbook 1for more on date plans.)

EXERCISE 11 - SOCIAL CIRCLE DATES

Think of one regular activity you do within your social circle and think of how you can bring

your date into it. List three ways that you can accommodate her into the evening and make her

feel a part of your circle. (For an example, refer to page 32 of the Types of Dates chapter in

Textbook 1.) If you do not have a regular activity within your social circle that accommodates

this plan, l ist some ideas for social circle activities that are fun for you and that would be goodfor dates. Consider pursuing these as an addition to your l ifestyle.

1.

a.

b.

c.

2.

a.

b.

c.


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EXERCISE 12 - YOUR WORLD DATES

Consider two major tenets of your l ifestyle and think of how you could bring your date into

them. List three ways that you could include her into each tenet. (For an example, refer to

page 34 of the Types of Dates chapter in Textbook 1. ) If you feel that it is not possible to

accommodate your date into a major tenet of your l ifestyle, think of a more tangential part of

your l ifestyle that would be good for dates.

1.

a.

b.

c.

2.

a.

b.

c.

EXERCISE 13 - H IGH VALUE DATES

High value dates work well but take work to ensure. In the space below, write out three places

you already have, or would l ike to have, high value. ( If you are unsure what a high value loca-

tion could be, refer to page 36 of the Types of Dates chapter in Textbook 1. )

1)

2)

3)

Now that you know the locations for high value dates, write down the people at these locations

youll have to befriend to gain status. If you dont know whom you should befriend, start going


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to the venue and taking names of people working there and write them in the spaces below.

Generally, the higher they rank in the venue, the better they are to know.

1)

2)

3)

Lastly, some days/nights are better than others for befriending staff. For instance, a Friday

night is usually too busy for you to chat with the manager of a bar. However, he may be moreavailable on a Wednesday. In the space below, write the best times to work your venues so you

can schedule them into your week.

1)

2)

3)

EXERCISE 14 - BAR HOPPING DATES

Pick three venues that would be good for bar hopping. If you can, try to make them in close

proximity to one another. Most importantly, have one that is close to your house.

1)

2)

3)


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Of these three, find one you would l ike to combine with your high value date and put a star

beside it. Go back to Exercise 13 and add it in if it isnt already there.

EXERCISE 15 - SE COND DATES

In the space below, write out two low-key examples of second date spots. You dont necessar-

i ly need three locations l ike you do for first dates. (Refer to page 40 of the Types of Dates

chapter inTextbook 1 for examples.)

1)

2)

For each location, write out an activity or plan for what youl l do.

1)

2)

Lastly, create an exit strategy or plan for escalation so you can get the girl to your bedroom.

1)

2)


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EXERCISE 16 - CONVEYING IDENTITY TRAITS

Conveying identity is easy once you have the proper dress, style, etc. The hard part is putting

your ensemble together. Since fashion and trends are always changing, you should keep an eye

out for whats trendy and whats not. At the same time, you need an idea of what style is right

for you. This can be done by modeling yourself after somebody else.

In the space below, l ist three people, celebrities or movie characters, whose style youd l ike to

emulate. Think of the traits their styles enhance. These should be men who cast an image like

the one you want to cast.

1)

2)

3)

Note: If you want to model rock stars or a celebrity who is a l itt le bit outlandish, model what

they wearoff-stage, not while they are performing. You may be over-the-top if you model what

they wear in the spotlight.

EXERCISE 17 - REFINING YOUR WARDROBE

Of the three men in the previous exercise what does their style say about them (positive and

negative)? What words could you use to describe them, and what comes to mind when you first

look at their clothing and style?

1)

2)

3)


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Look at your list. Ask yourself if that is truly the identity you want to convey. Secondly, is this

identity congruent to the l ifestyle you are l iving? If not, you need to change your style or

change your l ifestyle so you become the complete package.

EXERCISE 18 - FRESHENING

A lot of freshening fixes are pretty quick. Its just a matter of putting aside the time to do them.

Refer to the l ist in the Freshening section of Textbook 2 . Do you hav e to take care of any of the

examples l isted? Perhaps you have some of your own? In the space below write what needs to

fixed and allot time in your schedule for it.

1)

2)

EXERCISE 19 - GROOMING

The biggest fix you can make for grooming is your hairstyle. Think of your favorite celebrities

or characters in movies. Write down three below.

1)

2)

3)

Hop on the internet and run a search for their hairstyles. Ask yourself if the hairstyle is relevant

not only to your image but also to the trends of today. (If you are unsure ask your stylist.)


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Lastly, book a consultation with a hairstylist. These are free and its their job. Take in the pic-

tures from your search and ask your stylist what would loo k good on you. Different facial shape s

accommodate haircuts differently, so what may look good on one celebrity may not suit your

face or hair type. Get the stylist to make suggestions as well.

EXERCISE 20 - DRESS

Take a look at your wardrobe and style right now. Ask yourself if it is based more on functional-

ity or conveying identity. If its the former, you need an overhaul.

Go through your closet and pick out at least three items that you know could be improved. In

the space below, write what you would l ike to replace them with so you have an idea when you

go out to buy clothes.

1)

2)

3)

Its a good idea to start with three items and incorporate new ones as the seasons change. In

time, you should be buying clothes in a nice rotation.

EXERCISE 21 - PREPARING YOUR PLACE

Before your next date, check that you have done the following:

___ Cle an bat hroom

___ Only one couch to sit on in living room

___ Only bed is free to sit on in bedroom


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___ Clot hes in hamp er

___ No cloc ks in sigh t

___ Blin ds are down in bedro om

___ Wine (red and white) and vodka

___ Condoms stashed in various locations

EXERCISE 22 - FIRST LOCATIONS

Using the guidelines in the First Locations section of the Preparing and Planning textbook,

write down three possible first date locations for your date.

1)

2)

3)

EXERCISE 23 - SECOND LOCATIONS

Using the guidelines in the Second Locations section of the Preparing and Planning text-

book, write down three possible second date locations for your date.

1)

2)

3)

EXERCISE 24 - THIRD LOCATIONS

Using the guidelines in the Third Locations section of the Preparing and Planning text-

book, write down three possible third date locations for your date.

1)


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2)

3)

EXERCISE 25 - WHO

In the space below, write out a couple of people who can provide you with social proof during

your dates. Try to coordinate one person to a location from Exercises 22, 23, and 24.

1)

2)

Next, write out how these people can provide you with social proof or what sort of access they

may provide you during the date.

1)

2)

EXERCISE 26 - SKETCHING OUT YOUR DATE

Using the example from the Example Of A Basic Date Plan box on page 21 of the Prepar-

ing and Planning chapter in Textbook 1as a reference, sketch out a timeline for your date.


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EXERCISE 27 - SELLING YOUR DATE

Looking at your sketch from Exercise 26, write down some sensory details about each location

that you can use to upsell them to your date. These should be engaging details, not logical

facts. Turn to the Selling the Event section of the Preparing and Planning textbook for an

example.

1.

a.

b.

c.

2.

a.

b.

c.

3.

a.

b.

EXERCISE 28 - SETTING STANDARDS

In the space below, l ist at least 8 qualities you expect a woman you date to have. For each qual-

ity, give a meaning. If you want an adventurous woman, it will imply that she is open to trying

new things. Beneath each quality write a brief anecdote of how youll set this frame or give an

example of a story.

All of the qualities you l ist should be desired in a woman you date long term. Circle the quali-ties that only matter for women you date casually. This will help you determine which women

are suitable for a serious relationship and which ones are best to keep casual.

Example: Adventurous - Shel l be open to trying new things - Il l set this by tell ing a story. I

love to go climbing on the weekends. Its pretty much my favorite activity and Im always look-

ing for new spots. Im always up for an adventure. Are you an outdoor girl?


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EXERCISE 29 - DEFINING BOUNDARIES

On the next page, l ist 5 qualities you will not tolerate from the women you date. For each qual-

ity, give a meaning. If you wil l not tolerate a woman who is constantly negative, it wil l imply that

she brings you down and sucks energy from you. Beneath each quality write a brief anecdote of

how youll set this frame or give an example of a story.

Beside each qualit y, write whether or not its a deal breaking hard boundary or a soft bound-

ary. For a woman you seriously date , you must hold up your soft and hard bound aries. For women

you date casually, you cant expect them to adhere to all of your soft boundaries. Recognizing

this before you start dating will cause less frustration later.

Example: Negative - She wil l drag me down when I hang out with her for extended periods - Il l

set this boundary by refusing to engage in negative conversation, and if she persists I wil l tell

her we need to talk about something more positive. This is a soft boundary because I wont be

hanging out with casual dates enough to let it affect me and I dont want to let negative people

be involved in my day-to-day l ife.


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EXERCISE 30 - THE MAGICAL WHAT IF

In the space below think of the potential outcomes from the situations l isted using the magical

what if. Write out contingencies for each situation so you know how to deal with them when

they arise. Circle the best outcome. After each date, write at least one situation you get into

where the magical what if would have served you well then figure out a contingency for the

next time.

Example

Q: What if she shows up late?

A: I sit tight at my house and think She must really want to impress me by making sure she is

getting ready. I stay relaxed until she comes and feel at ease.

A: I get angry and let it affect me. In turn, she thinks I overreact and the date goes badly.

A: I use this as an opportunity to make sure my house is clean. When she shows up, I tease her

by saying, You look gorgeous, but you didnt have to spend all night getting ready for me

and give her a hug.

Q1: What if I ask her to come back to my place for (a glass of wine, to see the view, show her

my website, etc.)?

A:

Q2: What if I try to kiss her?

A:

Q3: What if she flakes on me with a legitimate excuse?

A:


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Q4: What if the bar we were going to go to is closed?

A:

Q5: What if she says, We shouldnt be doing this, when were in bed?

A:

YO UR QUE STI ON S:

EXERCISE 31 - INSPIRING COMPLIMENTS

Think of the last woman you went on a date with, or pay close attention to one you meet tomor-

row. Look at the details of her dress, hair, style. Think of three inspiring compliments you could

give her based on her appearance.

Story 1: I always wanted to be a fashion designer, so I moved to New York because that is

where the best scho ols are for it. I didnt like the city at fi rst, but I dont think I cou ld ever leave

now.

Compliments:

I think its great youve followed your goals. There arent many people who can actually stick

with their goals when the going gets tough. I admire driven people.

-

-

Story 2: I wen t backpacking in As ia a few years ago with m y sister. Its great because eve rything

in Thailand is so cheap... I dont know, I just always thought the culture over there was so cool

and I loved the beaches. I think I want to go to Australia next.


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Compliments:

Ive done a lot of travell ing too. I f ind when you travel you become more open-minded. Im a

sucker for adventurous types because they are always trying new things. Its boring when two

people just sit around watching TV.

-

-

EXERCISE 32 - FRAMING

Sometimes you have a short moment of time to insert frames into a conversation. If you miss

this opportune moment you may not get it again or have to force it, which is never good.

For the stock l ines below, write down scenarios from a past date when you could have used

them to set a frame.

Youre a p layer, arent you?

Example: When she brings up a story or complains about another guy.

1)

2)

Youre trouble. Ive got to watch out for you.

1)

2)

So many girls think that I can just be won over on the first date, but the hard part is actually

keeping me interested. I just have high standards so it takes somebody special.


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1)

2)

We need to find her a nice guy - a PG-13. I know you should be with a nice guy. A guy who will

buy you flowers. Be there when you come home and cook dinner for you.

1)

2)

EXERCISE 33 - LEADING

Think of the last date that you went on. Was there a time when you hesitated or let your date

take the lead? In the space below, write down three times that you gave up the lead when you

had a chance.

1)

2)

3)

Now, for each of those times, write out what led up to you not taking the lead and what

thoughts were going through your head.

1)

2)

3)


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Lastly, for the typical date you go on, write down what you should have done, or what you can

do next time and what outcome it wil l produce.

1)

2)

3)

Take a second to visualize these outcomes thoroughly. That way they will be embedded in your

mind so you can catch them in the moment on your next date.

EXERCISE 34 - KEEP IT CASUAL

Keeping it casual often involves keeping in the moment, but this can be tough when you are

trying to create a plan. In the space below, write some examples of how you can find out things

about her while sti l l making the conversation seem spontaneous.

Example 1) If I want to know if she has travelled, Ill talk about my recent trip to Tokyo and then

ask if she has travelled. If she has, Il l compliment her on being adventurous.

Example 2) My second location for the date will be a sports bar. This will be a good time to ask

her if she has played any sports. It wil l also allow me to talk about how I play soccer.

1)

2)

3)

4)

5)


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EXERCISE 35 - RE-SPARK ATTRACTION

In the space below, write down a role-play and one quick attraction story you can tell to inject

life into the beginning of your date.

Role-play

1)

Story

1)

EXERCISE 36 - QUALIFYING HER

In the space below, write down 10 qualities you desire in a woman with whom youre entering a

sexual relationship. These can include personality traits, passions, ambitions, and sexual tastes.

Refer to the Qualifying Her section of the On the Date textbook for examples.

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

6.

7.

8.

9.

10.


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EXERCISE 37 - RECOGNIZING QUALIFICATION

Now that youve defined the qualities youre looking for, in the space below write out how

youll recognize them. Go beyond the obvious She agrees with what I say for qualities she

displays without her consciously acknowledging them. Refer to the examples in the Qualify

Her section of the On the Date textbook.

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

6.

7.

8.

9.

10.

EXERCISE 38 - DISPLAYING QUALITIES

If you want to show your best qualities, ones that should be fi ltered through the attraction

switches, you need to know what they are before you attempt to display them.

In the space below, write your five best qualities.

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.


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Next, write how you will display these qualities. These could be through a story, showing her

evidence of them, or having other people acknowledge them in you indirectly.

In the space below, write a way you will display each quality:

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

EXERCISE 39 - ABOUT HER

If you are dating, especially if you are interested in finding a long-term partner, you must know

what things you value in a partner.

In the space below, write at least five things you require in a partner. These could be anything

from having a certain level of education to not having any kids. Star the ones that are deal

breakers.

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

For each of those qualities, write out how you will f ind out if she possesses them below. Thesecould be through asking questions or through certain clues she gives. Know what youre going

to look f or.

1.

2.

3.


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4.

5.

EXERCISE 40 - FREEZING UP

Everybody runs out of things to say on a date. While being comfortable with some silence is a

good thing, not being able to hold a conversation is a bad thing. This is why it is good to have

a panic l ine to avoid extended silences.

In the space below, write two lines or questions that you can use as your default when you com-

pletely run out of things to say.

1.

2.

These l ines should get the ball roll ing. It is also a good idea to have a universal topic you can

freely talk about (th at isnt the weather or the ne ws). Below, write a topic or story y ou can easily

bring up when you have nothing to say during a date. If it can relate to your l ine or question

above, even better.

1.

2.

EXERCISE 41 - MENTALITIES

Take a second to think of all of your beliefs about sex - good, bad, l imiting, and empowering.

Write them all below.

1)

2)

3)


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4)

5)

Look at your list and think back to where these beliefs first came from. Are they yours or are

they those of your parents, fr iends, upbringing, etc.? This may take a while, but you can often

discover where they first came from by meditating on their origins.

Once you discover the roots of those beliefs, examine if they are helping your end game or

hindering it. If its the latter, write an empowering belief in the space below to replace it.

EXERCISE 42 - PLAUSIBLE DENIABILITY

The best part about creating excuses for plausible deniabil ity is that they are often not too dif-

ficult and they dont have to be too serious.

Write out two excuses below. One should be a go to that you can use any time. (Go to the

Plausible Deniabil ity section of the End Game textbook to see examples.)

1)

2)

Take those excuses and give a brief lead up to how you will weave them into conversation. If

this seems difficult to you, make it a he said/she said like on page 21 of the End Game chapter

in Textbook 3.

1)

2)


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EXERCISE 43 - FRAMING TO PREVENT LMR

Think back to your last date. How well did you create sexual frames?

Think of the places youll go and the activities youl l do on your next date. (If you dont havea plan yet, go to page 21 of the Preparing and Planning chapter in Textbook 2 for date

ideas.) In the space below, set some goals for what sexual frames youd l ike to set by the time

you leave that location.

You wi ll pro bab ly wan t pla yful on es ear ly in th e dat e and more exp li ci t ones by the end of your

second location. Be specific in what youl l say or do to set them so you know what youre going

to do on your date.

1)

2)

3)

This is a simple exercise to do, but it can be challenging to meet these goals on your date. You

should eventually get to the point where you intuitively know how early and how intensely you

can set frames throughout your date.

EXERCISE 44 - BUILDING A GROUNDING ROUTINE

Before you can create an entire grounding story you need to identify its three major parts -

where you came from, where you are now, and where you are going. These three elements

should connect to create the foundation of your story. They must tie in together.

Past)

Present)

Future)

Next, take those foundational elements and weave in the details. Make sure the details are


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ones that shape the journey between the main elements. For an example of this, turn to page

24 of the End Game chapter in Textbook 3 to see how playing baseball transitions into

learning computer programming.

date! (a4) workbook - student workbook (32)

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