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PROTECTION & STRENGTH

FOR OUR FAMILIES

EPHRAIM UTAH STAKE

PROVIDING

PORNOGRAPHYHELPS FOR DEALING WITH

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If there is anything virtuous, lovely,

or of good report or praiseworthy,we seek after these things.

13th Article of Faith

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PROTECTION & STRENGTH

FOR OUR FAMILIES

EPHRAIM UTAH STAKE

PROVIDING

PORNOGRAPHYHELPS FOR DEALING WITH

January 2016

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The Church views sexuality positivelyas a sacred gift from

God with the primary purposes of reproducing life upon the

earth and bonding the husband and wife together in an eter-

nal, affectionate, committed relationship. High standards of

personal morality and sexual conduct, including chastity be-

fore marriage and fidelity in marriage, are taught as norms for

Church members.

The Encyclopedia of Mormonism

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Page

Letter from the Stake Presidency . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 6

Purpose and Scope . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 7

What is Pornography? . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 7

Pornography Statistics at a Glance . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 8

The Four Levels of Involvement . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 10

The Effects of Pornography . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 12

Talking About Pornography in the Home . . . . . . . . . . . 18

Practical Steps for Every Home . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 24

Parenting and Personal Protection . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 26

The Family: A Proclamation to the World . . . . . . . . . . . 28

Clean and Safe Media Pledge . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 29Additional Resources . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 30

TABLE OF CONTENTS

Acknowledgements:

This booklet is updated and revised from a previous work published in 2010. Thanksis given to the committee members assigned to edit and update: Bishop Jason Ste-vens, sister Cindy Averett and sister Kjirsten Howe.

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We are at wara war which is inflicting many casualties. We have beenand are continually being warned about the seriousness of this conflict.The enemy is pornography and the evil influences coming from socialmedia and the Internet. The good news is that the Lord has given usweapons to fight this war and has reminded us if ye are prepared, yeshall not fear (D.C. 38:30). The Priesthood has been empowered tolead the fight against this war, but it will take the combined efforts ofall of us to mount a successful front.

The purpose of this booklet is to provide a toola weaponto helpin the fight against pornography on one of the major fronts of this cam-paign: prevention. It is to help families build strong buffers in theirlives and in their homes, especially for our youth. Experience hastaught us that it is much easier to prevent this scourge from ever takingroot in peoples lives than it is to cure it later. Curing addiction isdefinitely possible, and priesthood leaders are constantly laboring withindividuals who have received terrible wounds from this awful menace.President Boyd K. Packer has stated: The priesthood holds consum-mate power. It can protect you from the plague of pornography . . . Ifone is obedient, the priesthood can show how to break a habit and evenerase an addiction. (Boyd K. Packer, Cleansing the Inner Temple, En-

sign, Nov. 2010, 74)

Our main effort in this booklet, however, is to give families, parents,grandparents, brothers and sisters, individuals and entire community aguide to help prevent this plague from ever getting started.

Pornography distracts from and is a perversion of healthy relationships.Discuss it with your children in age-appropriate ways. Take steps tomake your home a refuge from the storm. Speak out against pornog-raphy in your family and community. Please carefully read these pages

and decide how you and those you love and labor with can combat thisterrible evil. We will win this war!

The Ephraim Stake Presidency

Kim AverettJan JonsonLarry Smith

From the Stake Presidency...

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Lds.org states: Pornography is any material depicting or describing the humanbody or sexual conduct in a way that arouses sexual feelings. It is distributedthrough many media, including magazines, books, television, movies, music, andthe Internet. It is as harmful to the spirit as tobacco, alcohol, and drugs are tothe body. Using pornograph-ic material in any way is a

violation of a commandmentof God: Thou shalt not . . .commit adultery . . . nor doanything like unto it (D&C59:6). It can lead to otherserious sins. Members of theChurch should avoid por-nography in any form andshould oppose its produc-

tion, distribution, and use.

The Encyclopedia of Mormonism explains, The Church views sexuality pos-itivelyas a sacred gift from God with the primary purposes of reproducinglife upon the earth and bonding the husband and wife together in an eternal,affectionate, committed relationship. High standards of personal morality andsexual conduct, including chastity before marriage and fidelity in marriage, aretaught as norms for Church members.

The purpose of this booklet is to:

Pornography isANYmaterialdepicting or describing thehuman body or sexual conductin a way that arouses sexualfeelings

PURPOSE AND SCOPE

Inform you about the magnitude and gravity of the pornography epidemic

Remind you what the prophets and general authorities of the Church havetaught regarding the evils of pornography

Give you practical resources and family discussion points to help preventexposure and addiction in your family.

For those already caught in the snareof pornography, help is available.Repentance is possible. The Atone-ment can heal souls of this affliction.Christ offers hope and forgiveness forthose who come unto him. Resourcesand help to overcome addiction areavailable through your bishop and at:https://overcomingpornography.org

WHAT IS PORNOGRAPHY?

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Every 39 minutes, a new pornographic video is made in the USA

Every second $3,075.64 is being spent on pornography on the internet

Every second 372 people are typing the word adult into search engines 40 million American people regularly visit porn sites

35% of all internet downloads are related to pornography

25% of all search engine queries are related to pornography

68 million search queries a day are porn related

One third of porn viewers are women

Search engines get 116,000 queries every day related to child porn

2.5 billion emails sent or received every day contain porn

About 200,000 Americans are porn addicts 40% of all pornography depicts acts of violence against women

9 out of 10 children ages 8-16 have viewed pornography on the internet

Studies document the average age of first exposure as 12 years old

Social media apps to be aware of:

PORNOGRAPHY STATISTICS AT A GLANCE

Sources: Deseret News, Huffington Post, extremetech.com, webroot

Despite a no-porn policy, social media

giantFacebookhas become one of theInternets top spots for exchanging

explicit images.

TwitterandTumblrdont bother withno-porn policies

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30% The percentage of all data availableon the internet that is pornography

400,000Estimated number of websites dedicated to porn

28,258 per secondThe average number of on-line porn viewers

34%The number of internet users who

experience unwanted exposure to por-

nographic content through ads, pop-

ups, misdirected links and emails.

450 MillionThe estimated number of hits those websites get in a

month more than Netflix, Amazon and Twitter

combined.

$97,000,000,000The global dollar value of the porn industry.

Sources: Deseret News, Huffington Post, extremetech.com, webroot

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1. Inadvertent Exposure.I believe that everyone has been inadvertent-ly exposed to pornography. There is no sin in this when we turn awayand dont pursue it. It is like a mistake, which calls for correction rath-er than repentance.

2. Occasional Use.This use of pornography may be occasional or evenfrequent, but it is always intentional, and that is its evil.

The danger with any intentional use of pornography, no matter howcasual or infrequent, is that it always invites more frequent exposure,which will inevitably increase preoccupation with sexual feelings andbehavior. Scientists have discovered that sexual images produce chem-icals in the brain that reward sexual feelings, which then encourage

more attention to sexual behavior. Immoral sexual behavior of anykind or degree produces feelings of shame, which, over time, can beentrenched within an individual.

3. Intensive Use.Repeated intentional use of pornography can make itsuse a habit, a behavior pattern regularly followed until it has becomealmost involuntary. With habitual use, individuals experience a needfor more stimulus to have the same reaction in order to be satisfied.

4. Compulsive Use (Addiction).A persons behavior is addictive whenit forms a dependency (a medical term applied to the use of drugs,alcohol, compulsive gambling, etc.) amounting to an irresistible com-pulsion that takes priority over almost everything else in life.

Elder Dallan H. OaksRecovering from the Trap of Pornography Ensign, October 2015

Throughout our lives, all of us willencounter material with sexual content.

With the guidance of our loving Savior, in-cluding the assurance from the sacramen-tal covenants that we may always havehis Spirit to be with us, we can alwaysrespond appropriately.

Dallan H OaksEnsign, October 2015

PORNOGRAPHY LEVELS OF INVOLVEMENT

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While you are free to choose for yourself, you are not free to choose the conse-

quences of your actions. When you make a choice, you will receive the consequenc-

es of that choice. The consequences may not be immediate, but they will always

follow, for good or bad. Wrong choices delay your progression and lead to heart-

ache and misery. Right choices lead to happiness and eternal life. That is why it is

so important for you to choose what is right throughout your life.

You are responsible for the choices you make. You should not blame your circum-

stances, your family, or your friends if you choose to disobey Gods command-

ments. You are a child of God with great strength.

You have the ability to choose righteousness and happiness, no matter what your

circumstances.

Agency and Accountability

For the Strength of Youth

Intellectual Reserve, Inc.

2001, p. 4

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Cybersex addictions are a major factor contributing to separation and di-vorcefor many couples. (divorce.usu.edu)

Frequent pornography use tends to be associated with sexually aggressive be-havior, sexual deviance, decreased intimacy, decreased sexual satisfaction, andincreased marital dissatisfaction.(Ibid)

In a survey of divorce lawyers it was shown that 56% of the divorce casescould be attributed to one of the parties obsessive use of pornographic web-sites.

J.C. Manning, 2006

The Impact of Internet Pornography on Marriage and the Family

Guilt, fear, and depression, are common emotions for those involved withpornographyguilt because they know what they are doing is wrong; fear, be-cause they are terrified their secret will be found out; and depression becausethey no longer feel the spirit.

Danger Ahead! Avoiding Pornographys Trap. New Era, October 2002, p. 34

Overwhelmingly, sexual addiction experts say hesitancy, shame and embarrass-ment surrounds pornography and largely prevents families from getting theinformation they need to fight it from the start . . .

Jacob HancockShame keeps porn in the dark Deseret News Archives, 21 Sept 2010

THE EFFECTS OF PORNOGRAPHY

Johansson, T. & N. Hammarn, 2007Hegemonic Masculinity and Pornography: Young peoples attitudes toward and

relations to pornography. Journal of Mens Studies, 15(1), p. 57-70

15%

49%

29%

62%Teenagers who

DIDview porn andadmitted to having

sexual intercourse:

Teenagers who

did NOTview porn and

admitted to having

sexual intercourse:

BOYS GIRLS

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The problem of child sex slavery is100 percent the societal consequence ofour pornographic world.

Timothy Ballard, former CIA and Homeland Security agent

Rescuing Children from Sex Slavery: One Mormons Inspired MissionJamie Armstrong | Feb. 27, 2015 LDS Living Magazine

During certain critical periods of childhood, a childs brain is being pro-grammed for sexual orientation. Studies have shown that the prefrontal partof the brain that controls common sense, judgment, and emotion is not matureuntil approximately 21 years of age. Exposure to healthy sexual norms and

attitudes during this critical period can result in the child developing a healthysexual orientation. In contrast, if there is exposure to pornography during thisperiod, thoughts of sexual deviance may become imprinted on the childs harddrive and become a permanent part of his or her sexual orientation.

Jill Manning Ph.D. Marriage and Family TherapistThe Drug of the new Millennium: Brain Imaging Studies 2009-2010.

Children often imitate what theyve seen, read, or heard. When children watch

cowboys and Indians, they want to go play cowboys and Indians. When kidswatch sex, its no surprise they want to act out sexually. Some studies sug-gest that exposure to pornography can prompt kids to act out sexually againstyounger, smaller, and more vulnerable children. (Ibid)

If you have the Internet, you have pornographyin your home.

The Internet is the perfect delivery system for anti-social behaviorits free,its piped into your house. . . [and] Internet porn is probably the biggest mised-ucation system we can devise in terms of sexuality, misuse of women.

David Crary

Activists Clash on Effect of Porn Deseret News, 2 Apr 2006

In 1993, when Internet pornography became public, there was this huge shift;that protective barrier between the sex industry and youth dissolved. Now, ifyou have the Internet, you have pornography in your home.

Jill Manning, Ph.D. Marriage and Family TherapistArchive of Statistics: Internet Pornography 2009-2010

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We are waging a war with sin, my

brothers and sisters, but we need notdespair. It is a war we can and willwin. Our Father in Heaven has giv-en us the tools we need in order to doso. He is at the helm. We have noth-ing to fear. He is the God of light.He is the God of hope. I testify that

He loves useach one.

President Thomas S. MonsonEnsign, May 2008, p. 90

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My dear young brothers and sisters, do not be de-ceived. Do not think that once you go on your missionor once you get married you can stop this addictivebehavior. If you are involved in it now, if you are en-trapped in this practice, get spiritual help now. Youcan overcome pornography with the Saviors assis-tance. Do not wait! I plead with you to leave it alone!

Elder M. Russell BallardCES Devotional for Young Adults

May 4, 2014

Keep yourselves free from the stains of the world.You must not indulge in sleazy talk at school. Youmust not tell sultry jokes. You must not fool aroundwith the Internet to find pornographic material. . . .

This salacious stuff simply is not for you. Stay awayfrom pornography as you would avoid a serious dis-ease. It is as destructive. It can become habitual, andthose who indulge in it get so they cannot leave italone. I plead with you young men not to get in-volved in its use. You simply cannot afford to. Thegirl you marry is worthy of a husband whose life hasnot been tainted by this ugly and corrosive material.

Pres. Gordon B. Hinckley

Ensign, May 1998, p. 49

Pornographic or erotic stories and pictures are worsethan filthy or polluted food. The body has defensesto rid itself of unwholesome food. With a few fatalexceptions, bad food will only make you sick butdo no permanent harm. In contrast, a person whofeasts upon filthy stories or pornographic or erotic

pictures and literature records them in this marvel-ous retrieval system we call a brain. The brain wontvomit back filth. Once recorded, it will always re-main subject to recall, flashing its perverted imagesacross your mind and drawing you away from thewholesome things in life.

Elder Dallin H. OaksPornography Ensign, May 2005, p. 8790

COUNSEL FROM CHURCH LEADERS

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We live in a very dangerous world that threatens those things that are most spir-itual. The family, the fundamental organization in time and eternity, is underattack from forces seen and unseen. The adversary is about. His objective is tocause injury. If he can weaken and destroy the family, he will have succeeded.

Latter-day Saints recognize the transcendent importance of the family andstrive to live in such a way that the adversary cannot steal into our homes. Wefind safety and security for ourselves and our children in honoring the cove-nants we have made and living up to the ordinary acts of obedience required ofthe followers of Christ.

Isaiah said, The work of righteousness shall be peace; and the effect of righ-teousness quietness and assurance for ever.

That peace is also promised in the revelations in which the Lord declares, If yeare prepared ye shall not fear.

The consummate power of the priesthood has been given to protect the homeand its inhabitants. The father has the authority and responsibility to teach hischildren and to bless and to provide for them the ordinances of the gospel and

every other priesthood protection necessary. He is to demonstrate love and fi-delity and honor to the mother so that their children can see that love.

President Boyd K. PackerThese Things I KnowGeneral Conference, April 2013

The priesthood holds consummate power. It

can protect you from the plague of pornogra-phy and it is a plague if you are succumb-ing to its influence.

Boyd K. PackerCleansing the Inner Vessel

General Conference, Oct. 2010

One thing is very clear: the safest place and

the best protection against the moral and spir-itual diseases is a stable home and family.

Boyd K. Packer

Ensign, May, 2004, p. 79

COUNSEL FROM CHURCH LEADERS

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Whatever you read, listen to, or look at has an effect on you. There-fore, choose only entertainment and media that uplift you. Goodentertainment will help you to have good thoughts and make righ-teous choices. It will allow you to enjoy yourself without losing the

Spirit of the Lord.

While much entertainment is good, some of it can lead you awayfrom righteous living. Offensive material is often found in websites, concerts, movies, music, videocassettes, DVDs, books, mag-azines, pictures, and other media. Satan uses such entertainment

to deceive you by making what is wrong and evil look normal andexciting. It can mislead you into thinking that everyone is doing

things that are wrong.

Do not attend, view, or participate in entertainment that is vulgar,immoral, violent, or pornographic in any way. Do not participatein entertainment that in any way presents immorality or violent

behavior as acceptable.

Pornography is a poison that weakens your self-control, changesthe way you see others, causes you to lose the guidance of the Spir-it, and can even affect your ability to have a normal relationshipwith your future spouse. If you encounter pornography, turn away

from it immediately.

Have the courage to walk out of a movie or video party, turn offa computer or television, change a radio station, or put down amagazine if what is being presented does not meet Heavenly Fa-

thers standards. Do these things even if others do not. Let yourfriends and family know that you are committed to keeping Godsstandards. You have the gift of the Holy Ghost, which will give you

strength and help you make good choices.

For the Strength of Youth2001, p. 17

Physical intimacy between husband and wife is beautiful andsacred. It is ordained of God for the creation of children andfor the expression of love between husband and wife. God has

commanded that sexual intimacy be reserved for marriage.

For the Strength of Youth2001, p. 35

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...we follow Christs example when we dress mod-estly, use clean and appropriate language, andavoid pornography, which now needs to betaught to Primary-age childrenso that they can

have pure lives.

Elder Quentin L. CookQuorum of the Twelve Apostles

The Rewards of RighteousnessMay 2, 2014

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Our homes are to be morethan sanctuaries; they should

also be places where GodsSpirit can dwell, where thestorm stops at the door, wherelove reigns and peace dwells.

Thomas S. MonsonFirst Counselor in the FirstPresidencyOctober 1999

TALKING ABOUT PORNOGRAPHY IN THE HOME

TALK TO YOUR KIDS!

Parents who cant get past the dis-comfort of the subject of pornographylong enough for occasional chats aboutit with their children are hurting themtwo-fold:

#1Parents are a childs only chance atgetting the facts about what sex reallymeans and about pornographys realeffects.

#2When parents ignore the topic ofpornography it sends the message thatnot only is pornography forbidden, itstoo taboo to talk about.

Jacob HancockShame keeps porn in the dark.

Deseret News Archives, 21 Sept. 2010

If we teach only about misused sexuality, our youth might become insecureand uncertain. We may inadvertently convey this confusing message: Sexualthoughts and feelings are bad, sinful, and wrongsave them for someone youlove. Youth who receive only negative messages about sexuality may conclude,Since sexual feelings and urges are bad, and I feel them very strongly, I toomust be bad. This kind of thinking can result in feelings of low self-worth, un-worthiness, and shame, leaving the person feeling distant from the Spirit. Openconversation can prevent much of this confusion.

Gray, Dan. A Message for Singles: Preparing for Healthy Intimacy in a SexuallyToxic Culture, UVU Conference, 15 Jan 2011

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We as parents and leaders need to counsel withour children and youth on an ongoing basis, lis-tening with love and understanding. They need

to know the dangers of pornographyand howit overtakes lives, causing loss of the Spirit, distort-ed feelings, deceit, damaged relationships, loss ofself-control, and nearly total consumption of time,

thought, and energy.

Linda S. ReevesReleif Society General Presidency

April 2015 Conference

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1. Dont Abondon the Outer Defences

3. Diagnose a Problem Correctly

2. Replace Myth with Truth

Protect children from encountering pornography as long as possible.

Safeguard your children until the time they can safeguard

themselves. Delayed exposure allows for healthy development.

Addiction is a dangerous potential outcome of pornography, but not

all exposure is addiciton. (see Levels of Involvement p 8)

Teach children that pornography is bad, but also teach that sex and

intimacy is good within the bounds Heavely Father has set.

Pornography is NOT sex education. Pornography is sex miseducation

marketed for financial gain.

Answering questions frankly about sex does not condone promiscu-

ity. Teenagers who are the most sexually active are usually the least

informed. Children and young people who get answers from parents

at early ages are usually the ones who avoid sexual experimentation.

The sexual responce cycle within us is natural. It is a God given en-

dowment that draws us naturally toward an eternal companion.

Parents need not wait until puberty to begin discussing sex. By age 8,

a child is able to develop a basic understanding of sex in its spiritual,

emotional, and relational contexts.

Parents, not peers, help children understand sex and intimacy.

Use correct terminology for body parts. Answer questions in simple

terms that convey an openness and comfort with the subject matter.

Try not to ritualize conversations. Create an ongoing dialog and

opportunities for children to ask questions whenver they have them.

TALKING ABOUT PORNOGRAPHY IN THE HOME

Arm your Kids for the Battle BYU Magazine

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Ask the Right Questions

Most teenagers will tell their bishops when theyre struggling

with pornography before they will tell their parents because

(1) their bishops ask them direct questions about it, and

(2) they often feel uncomfortable having conversations withtheir parents where they feel vulnerable.

Bruce Carpenter, professor of psychology at Brigham Young Uni-versity, recommends that parents develop the capacity to havesensitive conversations before they ask direct questions aboutpornography. This could include engaging your teenager in con-versations on the general topic of morality and standards.

Although Professor Carpenter says its more helpful to focus onbuilding a relationship than to follow a list of questions, he sug-

gests asking questions like those at right in your regular inter-views with your teenager.

Teenagers often become extremely uncomfortable during theseconversations, and its best if parents can respond by being open,sensitive, and nonjudgmental. Youth will be less likely to confessto parents who respond in highly emotional ways or take unwar-

ranted disciplinary action.

Find additional tools for protecting your family from pornography at:lds.org/go/protection914

The following is an exerpt from a December 2014 Ensign article titledHealing Hidden Wounds. It includes a few questions parents can ask toopen a dialogue with their teenage children on pornography.

TALKING ABOUT PORNOGRAPHY IN THE HOME

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Recommended Questions:

Q: What is the attitude among your friends about sexuality?Q: What is your perspective on the Churchs standard

of morality?Q: Do you ever struggle with pornography? Would

you feel comfortable telling me if you did?Q: In which situations do you find yourself most vulnerable?

Q: Where are you likely to view pornography?

Q: Which friends present the biggest problem? Howdo you think we can address that?

parents...develop the capacity to have sensitive

conversations...

TALKING ABOUT PORNOGRAPHY IN THE HOME

YOUR QUESTIONS

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Place computers in high-traffic areas of the home like kitchens, family rooms,

and studies. Position computer monitors so the screen faces out for public view.

Install a filtering program, learn its features and how to use it. But remem-ber, those who are determined to view pornographic materials will find a wayaround filters. The ultimate filter is the individuals themselves.

Teach family members how to escape if an inappropriate site is accidentallyaccessed.

Teach family members to tell parents if they encounter any form of pornogra-phy while on the computer. This will help reduce the fear or shame of acciden-tal exposure and encourages open discussion.

Avoid aimless surfing. It makes it easier to wander onto inappropriate sites.

Do not share personal information on-line. Many predators pose as children togain access and information that may put children at risk.

Educate yourself about your computer and how the Internet works. It is a re-ality of modern life.

Be aware of what your childrens school and public library policies are regardingInternet use and accessibility.

Limit the amount of time our children watch media including TV, playing videogames, or use of the Internet each day. Virtual reality must not become theirreality.

Spend quality time with children so you are consistently the main influence intheir lives, not the media or any peer group.

Hold regular family councils and decide what your media standards are goingto be. Review them frequently.

Make good media choices and set good examples for your children.

PRACTICAL STEPS FOR EVERY HOME

Kids WILL and must CONFRONT and DEAL with pornography.

It wont be enough for us to cocoon them.We must pre-armthem.

Lisa Ann Jackson Tompson, MABYU Magazine, Spring 2015

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PRACTICAL STEPS FOR EVERY HOME

Take time to watch appropriate media with your children. Discuss with themhow to make choices that will uplift and build rather than degrade and destroy.

Develop a loving, open, and influential relationship with your children, teach-ing them proper values and healthy attitudes toward sexuality.

The best protection is loving communication. Parents need to understand thattheir children will be exposed to corrosive material, at least briefly, and ofteninadvertently. Once exposed the issue becomes how children handle it. If homeis a loving, trusting, informed environment, children are more likely to turn toa parent.

How do we protect our youth? Filters are usefultools, but the greatest filter in the world, the onlyone that will ultimately work, is the personalinternal filter comes from a deep and abidingtestimony of our Heavenly Fathers love and ourSaviors atoning sacrifice for each one of us.

Linda S. ReevesSecound conselor in the Releif Society General PresidencyGeneral Conference, April 2015

Family Home EveningWecannot afford to neglect thisheaven-inspired program. Itcan bring spiritual growth to

each member of the family,helping him or her to with-stand the temptations whichare everywhere.

Thomas S. MonsonEnsign, May, 2005, p. 19

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When theres emotional connection inthe family, theres a huge amount of pro-

tection. Add to that gospel teachings, andyou have what amounts to a near firewallagainst harmful technology.

Corrosive content is not the only enemy.While Latter-day Saint parents understandthat Internet pornography is a grave threat;many are guarding that front door andforgetting about the back door, side doors,

and windows. One of those side doors isonline role-playing games . . . Another sidedoor is text messaging.

Internet filters and computers in the kitch-en are not enough. Responsible parentsknow not to put a computer in a childsbedroom . . . some dont think twice abouthanding their son or daughter a cell phone

with a browser, messaging and a camera.The solution is for parents to keep up onthe latest technologies. They must investi-gate thoroughly and put limits on any de-vices they buy. That means adding filters,disabling questionable features, and con-trolling access.

Its a problem for women too. Approxi-

mately one-quarter to one-third of pornog-raphy consumption is by females. Manywomen are drawn into Facebook relation-ships that lead to the production of por-nography for individuals they meet. Thesame dangers apply for women as men.

Pulling the plug is not an option. Someparents are so terrified by the prospect of

their children having access to the digitalworld that they pull the plugthey forbidany and all technology in their homes. Thatsolution creates a false sense of security.

M. Sue BerginFamily Focus: The Dangerous Digital VortexBYU Magazine, Winter 2011

PARENTING AND PERSONAL PROTECTION

Its not your location thatssafe or unsafeits how

you behave despite yourproximity to temptation.We cannot withdraw from

the world but instead areCALLED TO BE IN ITwhile we hold on to thescriptures, good parents,others who are godly, and,most of all, the Savior.

Elder Richard G. ScottEnsign, Nov. 2009

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Acronym for reasons

young people turn topornography:

BLAST

BOREDLONELY

ANGRY

STRESSED

TIREDDan Gray

A Message for Singles:

Preparing for Healthy Intimacy

in a Sexually Toxic Culture,

UVU Conference, 15 Jan 2011

Teach your children how to fightfleeting temptations which are

seductive thoughts or images thatquickly pop into ones mind. Chang-ing a fleeting temptation is similarto changing the television station.

Discuss with your family the mediain your home. Prayerfully considerwhether any content compromises

virtue and then make necessary cor-rections. Create a family pledge sup-porting righteous media use that allagree to live by and write it down.The pledge is then placed next tocomputers, televisions, etc. in yourhome as a reminder of your commit-ment to take a stand for righteous-ness. Periodically ask in future lessons

how family members are doing withthe media pledge.utahcoalition.org/clean-and-safe-media-pledge

Explain to your family that exposuredoes not equal addiction. Exposure topornography is very difficult to avoid,and it is important to teach your chil-

dren what to do in such circumstanc-es. Some suggestions are:

1) quickly turn away orshut down the website,computer or magazine.

2) talk with your parents

about what occurred andidentify ways pornographycould be avoided in thefuture.

PARENTING AND PERSONAL PROTECION

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This proclamation was read by President Gordon B. Hinckley as part of his message at the

General Relief Society Meeting held September 23, 1995, in Salt Lake City, Utah.

T F P C T A T C J C L- S

WE, THE FIRST PRESIDENCYand the Council of the TwelveApostles of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints,

solemnly proclaim that marriage between a man and a

woman is ordained of God and that the family is central to

the Creators plan for the eternal destiny of His children.

ALL HUMAN BEINGSmale and femaleare created in the

image of God. Each is a beloved spirit son or daughter ofheavenly parents, and, as such, each has a divine nature and

destiny. Gender is an essential characteristic of individual

premortal, mortal, and eternal identity and purpose.

IN THE PREMORTAL REALM, spirit sons and daughters knewand worshipped God as their Eternal Father and accepted

His plan by which His children could obtain a physical

body and gain earthly experience to progress toward per-

fection and ultimately realize their divine destiny as heirs of

eternal life. The divine plan of happiness enables family

relationships to be perpetuated beyond the grave. Sacred

ordinances and covenants available in holy temples make it

possible for individuals to return to the presence of God and

for families to be united eternally.

THE FIRST COMMANDMENTthat God gave to Adam and Evepertained to their potential for parenthood as husband and

wife. We declare that Gods commandment for His children

to multiply and replenish the earth remains in force. We

further declare that God has commanded that the sacred

powers of procreation are to be employed only between

man and woman, lawfully wedded as husband and wife.

WE DECLAREthe means by which mortal life is created to bedivinely appointed. We affirm the sanctity of life and of its

importance in Gods eternal plan.

HUSBAND AND WIFE have a solemn responsibility to loveand care for each other and for their children. Children

are an heritage of the Lord (Psalm 127:3). Parents have a

sacred duty to rear their children in love and righteousness,

to provide for their physical and spiritual needs, and to

teach them to love and serve one another, observe the com-

mandments of God, and be law-abiding citizens wherever

they live. Husbands and wivesmothers and fathers

will be held accountable before God for the discharge of

these obligations.

THE FAMILYis ordained of God. Marriage between man andwoman is essential to His eternal plan. Children are entitledto birth within the bonds of matrimony, and to be reared by

a father and a mother who honor marital vows with com-

plete fidelity. Happiness in family life is most likely to be

achieved when founded upon the teachings of the Lord

Jesus Christ. Successful marriages and families are estab-

lished and maintained on principles of faith, prayer, repen-

tance, forgiveness, respect, love, compassion, work, and

wholesome recreational activities. By divine design, fathers

are to preside over their families in love and righteousness

and are responsible to provide the necessities of life and

protection for their families. Mothers are primarily respon-

sible for the nurture of their children. In these sacred re-sponsibilities, fathers and mothers are obligated to help one

another as equal partners. Disability, death, or other circum-

stances may necessitate individual adaptation. Extended

families should lend support when needed.

WE WARN that individuals who violate covenants ofchastity, who abuse spouse or offspring, or who fail to ful-

fill family responsibilities will one day stand accountable

before God. Further, we warn that the disintegration of

the family will bring upon individuals, communities, and

nations the calamities foretold by ancient and modern

prophets.

WE CALL UPON responsible citizens and officers of gov-ernment everywhere to promote those measures designed

to maintain and strengthen the family as the fundamental

unit of society.

THE FAMILYA PROCLAMATION

TO THE WORLD

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OURClean & Safe MediaPLEDGEAs a family, we commit to making clean and safe media choices

in order to keep our home a happy and healthy place to be.

We will do this by1. Selecting books, Web sites, music, magazines, activities, and/or movies

that are in harmony with our family values.

2. Being kind to ourselves and to others by not posting or forwarding any-thing that could cause hurt, embarrassment, or offense. If we receive atext or e-mail that makes us feel uncomfortable, sad, or scared, we willtell a parent right away.

3. Showing respect for our body and others bodies by not looking at orposting nude or immodest images. If we accidentally come acrosssome-thing inappropriate, we will tell a parent right away.

4. Protecting identifying information by not posting phone numbers,addresses, or personal information in places where they can be seen bystrangers. If we are unsure, we will ask a parent before posting personalinformation.

5. Never meeting up with someone we have met online unless a parent

knows exactly where we are and someone accompanies us.6. Limiting our media use when it is late at night or we are home alone.

Signatures:

Date:

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Helpful Websites:www.lds.org -and- www.mormonnewsroom.org

www.overcomingpornography.orgwww.fightthenewdrug.org

Addiction Recovery Programs:www.addictionrecovery.lds.org (LDS 12 Step Addiction Recovery)www.salifeline.org

Counseling:

www.providentliving.lds.org -or- www.ldsfamilyservices.orgwww.ldsamcap.org

Establishing Internet Safety:www.salifeline.org www.ikeepsafe.orgwww.nsteens.org www.fightthenewdrug.org

Books and Educational Materials:

He Restoreth My Soul Donald L. Hilton, Jr., M.DHow to Talk to your Child about Sex Linda and Richard Eyre

Growing Up: Gospel Answers about Maturation and Sex Brad Wilcox

Whats the Big Deal about Pornography? Jill C. Manning

Confronting Pornography Mark Chamberlain, Dan Gray, & Rory Reid

Teaching Children about Healthy Sexuality:A Parents Guide, download at www.lds.org/manuals

Family Home Evening Resource Manual at www.lds.org/manualsLet Virtue Garnish Thy Thoughts Church Distribution pamphlet

Additional Helpful Materials:Rescuing Children from Sex Slavery: One Mormons Inspired MissionJamie Armstrong, Feb. 27, 2015 LDS Living Magazine

Arm Your Kids for the Battle Lisa Ann Thomas, BYU Magazine Spring 2015

Recovering from the Trap of Pornography Dallan H Oaks, Ensign Oct 2015

Avoiding/Overcoming Pornography, Real Families, Real Answers

www.byutv.org/watch/1377-113

lds.org/go/protection914

ADDITIONAL RESOURCES

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NOTES & IMPRESSIONS

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. . . Lift up your hearts and rejoice . .. and take upon you my whole armor,that ye may be able to withstand theevil day, having done all, that ye may

be able to stand.

Stand, therefore, having your loins girtabout with truth, having on the breast-

plate of righteousness, and your feet

shod with the preparation of the gospelof peace, . . .

Taking the shield of faith wherewithye shall be able to quench all the fiery

darts of the wicked;

And take the helmet of salvation, andthe sword of my Spirit, which I will pour

out upon you, and my word which Iwill reveal unto you. . .and be faithfuluntil I come, and ye shall be caught up,

that where I am ye shall be also.

Doctrine and Covenants 27:15-18