Diction: Putting it Into PracticeDiction: Putting it Into Practice

First, preview the following reading. Then click First, preview the following reading. Then click through each slide, considering the effect that through each slide, considering the effect that would be achieved from each suggested change would be achieved from each suggested change of wording.of wording.

This activity can be individual, or you can have a This activity can be individual, or you can have a classmate or friend go through the presentation classmate or friend go through the presentation with you. Whether on your own or with a friend, with you. Whether on your own or with a friend, consider each option and decide the best consider each option and decide the best rewording for the whole composition.rewording for the whole composition.

Hospital feels like war zone

Blood ran out slowly onto white sheets as Dr. RonO’Gorman put his gloved finger into the hole in theman’s chest to determine if a lung had beenpunctured. “Please stop…no more!” the man criedloudly, his face contorted with pain. “Oh my God, ithurts.”The doctor, deadpan, didn’t stop and continued tomove his finger around inside the wound on the rightside of the chest. Although the man kept yelling andtrying to kick his legs, the patient’s out-of-controltrembling had stopped.

It was shortly after 11 p.m. Thursday when theambulance containing the badly wounded patientarrived at Ben Taub General Hospital, but doctorshad already been told he was coming.Paramedics reported they had to physicallyremove the man off a spiked fence at a downtownhotel after he had stuck himself trying to climbover the barrier.

“He was just hanging there,” according to amedical technician.

Practice:Practice:

The following slides pull phrases and clauses from The following slides pull phrases and clauses from the reading and suggest alternate wordings.the reading and suggest alternate wordings.

In the Diction Practice document file you have In the Diction Practice document file you have opened on your desktop, make changes to the opened on your desktop, make changes to the wording of highlighted sections, choosing from wording of highlighted sections, choosing from the options suggested.the options suggested.

Blood ran out slowly onto white sheetsw oozedo seepeds trickledt exuded

Ron O’Gorman put his gloved fingerg pokedp shoveds jabbedj inserted

the man cried loudly, hish bawledb boo-hooedb screecheds wailed

continued to move his fingerf wigglew snakes wormw actuate

patient’s out-of-control tremblingt uncontrollableu endlesse spasmatics nutszoid

doctors had already been told he was coming contactedc informedi alerteda forewarned

had to physically remove the man off a spiked fencem pryp pluckp wrenchw extricate

after he had stuck himself impaledi harpoonedh shish-kabobbeds perforated

according to a medical technician.t saids exclaimede snickereds remarked

What next?What next?

Now that you’ve completed your rewrite of the reading, Now that you’ve completed your rewrite of the reading, I’d like to read it. In fact, I’d love to hear it!I’d like to read it. In fact, I’d love to hear it!

You can either save the changed document or record a You can either save the changed document or record a reading of your rewrite. Send either one to me by Vista reading of your rewrite. Send either one to me by Vista email, and I’ll reply with feedback.email, and I’ll reply with feedback.

Remember that you can follow this same process with Remember that you can follow this same process with your own writings and make them sound just as you your own writings and make them sound just as you would like. The decisions are yours to make.would like. The decisions are yours to make.