Transcript
Page 1: CHAIRMAN’S MESSAGE - jumpingjacs.org.uk JOURNAL 60.pdf · Woodside Park club. Barbara and I have attended six birthday parties for members who have celebrated their 100th birthday,

CHAIRMAN’SMESSAGE

Welcome to the Pesachedition of our everpopular journal. As

usual there are highlights, andregretfully disappointments.

Several clubs have closed,and I would like to thank theirchairs and committees formaking the effort to save theirbranches.

I am frankly surprised thatCockfosters club, who havebeen so capably run by JerryGreenberg and his late wife forso many years, and who havea regular attendance of over40, could not find onevolunteer to take on theresponsibility of Chairman.Without volunteer helpers theorganisation cannot continue,so my message to allmembers is to support yourchair in every way possible.

We have a new deputyChairman, Per Simonsson,who is shadowing me closely,and he has his ownprogramme on how torevitalise JACS. Usingmodern communicationmethods, Per is updating ourwebsite JumpingJacs.org.uk.When completed it will show

all the clubs' programmesso that anyone can refer to itand see exactly theprogrammes which are onoffer. Don't forget that onceyou are member of JACS, youare entitled to visit any cluband only pay their entrancefee. By referring to the website you can see an attractivechoice of programmes, andvisit both a Wednesday cluband a Thursday one.

By now you will be familiarwith the details of theforthcoming May holiday inEastbourne, and Barbara and Ilook forward to welcoming oldand new friends.

On the 10 June there is goingto be a performance of theopera Carmen. Some of theclubs have already heard theirprincipal singer, BronwenStevens, and this should be avery exciting afternoon.

The venue is the WoodsidePark Synagogue and furtherdetails can be obtained fromGloria Holman, the Chair ofWoodside Park club.

Barbara and I have attendedsix birthday parties formembers who have celebratedtheir 100th birthday, and wewere blown away by theirenergy and enthusiasm for lifethat they displayed. Please letme know if you have any100th birthdays coming up.

Once again, well done AngelaFeuer in producing thispublication, together with herassistance Gloria Holman.

Barbara and I hope that youhad a happy and goodPesach.

Harold Newman MBENational Chairman JACS

www.jumpingjacs.org.uk ISSUE 60 - PESACH 2018

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JACS JOURNALCONTENTS

Beehive Lane

Borehamwood

Brighton andHove

Bushey

Chigwell &Hainault

Gants Hill

Harrow MosaicReform

Mill Hill

Northwood

Southgate

Stanmore

Stonegrove

Sutton

Westcliff

Weybridge

Woodside Park

Pg Content

4 Editor’s message

5 Tongue in Cheek

6 Around the Branches

8 Pearl Ratner

10 The Master of the Hive

12 If G-d lives Anywhere

14 Michael Skapinker

16 Rimes Wot We Rote

17 Moo, moo or mooo!

18 Fake it

19 Food for Thought

20 Good News

21 Letters

21 Gordon Brown

22 What’s HotA big Thank You to all of ouradvertisers, your support is verymuch appreciated.

THE EDITOR RESERVES THE RIGHT TOEDIT COPY WHERE NECESSARY.Almost everything you read in newspapers,books and magazines and all illustrations aresomebody’s copyright including JACSJOURNAL; no part of which may bereproduced without permission. The copyrightholder might be the publication in which itappeared or the writer or artist who producedit. Before sending it to us for publication itrequires a telephone call to the publication toobtain permission to reprint it in our JACSJOURNAL. Ask for written confirmation andwhat acknowledgement is required.If it is worth publishing it must certainlybe worth making that phone call, right?

WEBSITE

WWW.JUMPINGJACS.ORG.UK

The web master is SharonDoron who can be contacted

directly [email protected]

Time flies like an arrow; but fruit flies like a banana. Groucho Marx

Page2 PESACH

EDITORAngela Feuer

Email: [email protected]: 01895 621400

AdvertisingMrs Gloria Holman

8 Birnbeck Court, 98 Bells Hill,Barnet EN5 2TD. T: 0208 364 8934

email: [email protected]

Thinking of joining JACS butwould like some questionsanswered before you do?Speak to SHEILA LEVITT - our National Secretary.Her phone number is:020 8954 6434

She’ll be happy to help you!

WEBSITEWWW.JUMPINGJACS.ORG.UKThe web master is Sharon Doron whocan be contacted directly [email protected]

JACS - NEXT ISSUEThe Journal is printed in time for Pesach andjust prior to Rosh Hashanah. Please let ushave your articles in good time.

JACS Clubs

GANTS HILL JACS

The 2018 AGM of the Gants HillJACS was held at 2a clarenceAvenue on the 1st March, which

was Purim. Some of the committeewere consequently in fancy dress!

Due to the adverse weather conditionsonly 2 JACS members and 2 representatives of the National JACSexecutive were able to join the local committee members for theafternoon.

Those attending had no major difficultyalmost finishing off the Hamentashenprovided.

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#PeopleOfJewishCare

There’s something special about coming together to celebrate all festivals. That’s why for someone like Alan, who lives with dementia every day of the year, we try and make every festival memorable. We need to raise £3,000 every single day just to care for people living with dementia.

Will you help make sure that no one has to face dementia alone this Pesach and beyond?

To donate please call 020 8922 2600 or visit jewishcare.org/donate

Charity Reg No. 802559

We make sure Alan

celebrates every

festival

09:50

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Page4 PESACH

I like to write when I feel spiteful. It is like having a good snooze. D H Lawrence

STAYING IN TOUCH …….

How does one stay in touch?Philosophizing – do you subscribe to theadage by writing long letters telling all the

news in glorious technicolour (beloved byAmericans), by sending a card for eitherbirthday, anniversary or condolence with amessage – by making a telephone call,contacting by email or text…… and by anyother means I have not mentioned.

I feel sending any information via social mediais a bit impersonal, but the technologicalrevolution has surely resolved the dilemma.Hardly anyone under 30 sends cards or caresabout them. They use Twitter and other suchdevelopments to stay in touch – and they do somost successfully. Whom am I to buck thistrend? Just because I am not on Facebookmeans that I am not up to the 21st Century andam old fashioned, but wait for it! ….. mychildren portray my news as well as their ownon their page, so indeed I am sort of ‘with-it’ –by default – it must be said. However, like penand ink, paper salutations are surely anendangered species. Additionally, think of allthe artists, illustrators and printers that would go

out of business if cards disappear, not tomention the charities who raise money byselling their missives.

Despite these salient facts, I really like receivingcards for my birthday and news from far awayfriends, so ignore my protestations agin thecarefully chosen cards and missives, whichinevitably end up as non cherished keepsakesor barely glanced at recycling fodder.

Enough procrastination – I’m joining the 21stCentury and the one click revolution apart fromthe immediate family, a distant band of agingfriends (local) and relatives and some friends Irarely see but want to keep in touch with.

However, the ways one keeps in touch surelydo not matter as LONG AS ONE DOES. Theyare often the once a year notation showing thatyou are thinking of that particular person –however fleetingly, and are really appreciatedby the recipient. So …….in the words of thattime honoured classic CARRY ONREGARDLESS.

Have a happy and healthy Pesach.

Angela FeuerEditor

EDITOR’S MESSAGE

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PESACH Page5

The only way to get 30 minutes uninterrupted rest in a hospital, is to ring for a nurse. Old Southern saying

WITH A TONGUE IN MYCHEEK!

AN EMAIL FROM AN ARAB STUDENT TOHIS DAD

Dear Dad,

Berlin is wonderful, people are nice and Ireally like it here, but Dad I am a bit ashamedto arrive at my college with my pure goldFerrari 599GTB when my teachers and manyfellow students travel by train.

Your son Nasser

The next day, Nasser gets areply to his email from hisDad....

My dear loving son,

Twenty million US Dollars have just beentransferred to your account. Please stopembarrassing us. Go and get yourself a traintoo.

Love – your Dad

AND ALSO...

☛ Do you ever wake up, kiss the personsleeping beside you, and feel glad that youare alive?

I just did, and apparently will not beallowed on this airline again...

☛ Every family has one weirdrelative - if you don’t know who itis, then it’s probably YOU!

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Page6 PESACH

Luck is not something you can mention in the presence of self-made men. E B White

MILL HILL JACS‘BARMITZVAH ANDCHANUKAHPARTY”

Very appropriately the MillHill JACS celebratedtheir Barmitzvah as they

were 13 years old, on the 13December 2017. For thisauspicious event they hadScott Haynes, a popularvocalist, entertaining the 150people gathered together, aswell as laying on a delicious

high tea, and finally lighting theMenorah to commemorateChanukah.

Scott entertained the crowdwith selections from FrankSinatra, Neil Drummond,Bobbie Daren and DeanMartin to name but a few, andseveral people got up to danceto the songs, which created ahappy, friendly atmosphere inthe hall. Harold and BarbaraNewman, (the NationalChairman and NationalSecretary) were guests ofhonour, and Harold and hislady did not disappoint as theywere the first up on the floor tolead the dancing!!

After a delicious tea consistingof sandwiches, scones andcream, fishballs and variouscakes as well as theubiquitous donuts RabbiSchochet lit the Chanukahlights with Harold Newmanand as per usual entertainedthe throng with his jokes(some of which we had heardpreviously – but we stilllaughed anyway!).

Thanks should be given to thecommittee who had organizedthis event so well at Mill Hill.

Angela FeuerVisiting Editor!

AROUND THEBRANCHES

YET ANOTHER SUCCESSFULCHANUKAH OCCASION!!

Southgate has done it again! ….. a Chanukah teaparty was enjoyed by 75 members of SouthgateJACS. The hall was festooned with balloons and

decorations and the colourful tablecloths added greatjoy to the atmosphere. We had the National Chairman,Harold Newman, together with his wife, Barbara, as wellas other guests – the Executive Vice Chairman and theExecutive Secretary, who honoured us with theirpresence.

We all enjoyed the excellent lunch ordered by ourwonderful Chair, Dorothea Baker. The entertainmentprovided by Beverley Stone put all in a happy mood aswas evident by the crowded dance floor.

We were also thrilled to have our honorary member,Mrs Minnie Allsuch. She is 102 years ‘young’, and as fresh as a daisy, as you can see fromthe photos. What a joy it was watching Millie beat up that dance floor and able to move betterthan many of us. Mr Jonathan Clark, Chairman of RAC Southgate Progressive Synagoguevery kindly stood in for our Rabbi and lit the 8 candles and had everyone joining in veryenthusiastically with a Chanukah song.

We look forward to celebrating again next Chanukah, PG

Vicky Griver, Southgate JACS

Dancing with a very lively 101 year old. She hadmore energy than me. What an inspiration. Harold

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PESACH Page7

There is no crime, absolutely none, that cannot be condoned when ‘our’ side commits it. George Orwell

CHANUKAH DO AT NORTHWOOD JACS

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Page8 PESACH

One doesn’t realise in early life that the price of freedom is loneliness. To be happy is to be tied. C S Lewis

NORTHWOOD JACSFIRSTCENTENARIANPEARL RATNERBorn in 1917

The heading says it all!! Therewas a record crowd at JACsNorthwood to celebrate Pearl’sspecial birthday and a lusciousspread of sandwiches andcakes to commemorate thisoccasion. Pearl had receiveda telegram from the Queenand from the Chief Rabbi.This was her third celebrationas firstly she had a large familyand friends party at HendonUnited Synagogue where herchildren, grandchildren andmany great grandchildrengathered together, - somecoming to join her from as faraway as Australia. Thesecond event was at herabode in Hatch End with herfriends from Lutyens Lodge.

As a preamble to the festivitiesat Northwood, Joe Melnick, the

Chairman, expressed hisdelight at the proceedings.Harold Newman, NationalChairman accompanied by theNational Secretary, SheilaLevitt, presented Pearl with acertificate from JACS to markthe occasion.

Then the birthday girl dancedto the table to cut the cake andthe assembled crowdhonoured her by singing“Happy birthday to you”.

Pearl thanked the committeeand said how much shealways looked forward toWednesdays at the club. Shewished everyone good healthand happiness for many yearsto come PG.

What a woman!! I am surethat with her verve and vitalityshe will be around till 120PG……….

Angela Feuer

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Do not worry about avoiding temptation. As you grow older it will avoid you. Comedian Joey Adams

PESACH Page9

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Life is always a tightrope or a feather bed. Give me the tightrope. Edith Wharton

Page10 PESACH

THE MASTER OFTHE HIVE ATBEEHIVE

Arnold Rose has beenassociated with BeehiveLane JACs way before

he became the deputychairman which he held fornine months prior to takingover the Chairmanship of thebranch when Jean Finn zl diedin December 2017.

He was a member of BeehiveSynagogue’s Choir since itstarted in the l960’s, andlatterly used to get cakes andmilk for the JACs organizationwhen it met at the synagogue.Arnold’s wife passed away in2012, and he became amember of JACs after that anddid go on the committee andprovide a very useful serviceobtaining important items suchas a microphone and variousequipment which they needed.The committee must haverecognized his worth as theyhad no hesitation in appointinghim to higher office!Subsequently, of course, heobtained the top job!!

Arnold was married to his dearwife for nearly 59 years, andshe passed away at 80 yearsof age in December 2012 – itwas a long and happymarriage blessed with twochildren, a son and a daughter,who in turn have progeny oftheir own. His son has fourchildren – 3 boys and a girl,and his daughter has one boyof 20 years of age who sharesa birthday with one of hiscousins. He also has twosisters, one who lives inLeicester aged 72 and theother resides in Chigwell aged80, so what with one thing andanother it is a pretty largegroup. Arnold, himself, is now86 years old and celebrateshis birthday in November, andI guess it will be greatcelebrations on the 19.11 withthe family.

He was educated at theJewish Secondary Schoolbased in Bedfordshire run byDr Schonfield and Dr DihanGrunfield. Now this augustestablishment is better knownas the Hasmonian GrammarSchool as they moved toHendon after the War andchanged their name. Arnoldwas 13 when he left schooland then went back toLeicester where his parentsresided. The whole familyoriginally lived in London’sEast End but were evacuatedto Leicester. He also spent ayear in a Jewish Hostel up inWales, run by Rabbi Unterman(who was from Liverpool), butleft at the tender age of 14 torejoin his family in Leicesterand take up a job in a clothingfactory, making coats and

costumes, in the tailoringdepartment. He actuallywanted to learn to be a patterncutter but had to take hobson’schoice!

So for six months he appliedhimself to tailoring, but thenmoved down to London inorder to make his fortune at 15years of age. There heachieved his ambition as heworked with a London cousinwho was running a ladiesdress factory in Dalston, andthis relation took Arnold underhis wing and taught himcutting. Additionally, heattended Regents StreetPolytechnic to refine his art.However, after a year hedecided to rejoin his parents inLeicester and went into hisparent’s business ‘doingmarkets’ – helping them for anumber of years, until he was18 and called up for NationalService. As well as doing twoyear’s National Service he alsohad to do two years territorial.The training he received wasin the medical core and hebecame a nursing orderly.

After National Service herejoined his parents and thefamily business, and startedmaking skirts for the business.He also used to do somenegotiations in his line inLondon, visiting manufacturersof skirts and jeans, and on histravels met the father of thegirl he was to marry! In 1954he got married and bought ahouse in Ilford which he stilllives in! Arnold fondlyremembers that they gotmarried at Shackwell LaneSynagogue in Stoke

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My prediction? That the job of doomsayer will always be secure. Laurence Dodds

PESACH Page11

Newington and had thereception at the Town Hall, andby all events it was amemorable occasion. Hethen went into business withhis father in law sharing afactory which manufacturedblouses and other items andthis lasted a few years, butthen he was asked to run afactory in Islington – anopportunity too good to missas they manufactured, amongother notable names, NormanHartnell apparel. After a 5year stint another opportunitypresented itself as managingthe factory for Cresta Couture– they had shops in BondStreet and were consideredhigh class. Unfortunately,after 5 years the bubble burstand he was made redundant.

Nevertheless – Arnold waspragmatic. He had alwaysbeen a keen amateurphotographer and now took

it up in a big way. Somuch so he has

been a

photographer now for over 30years and ‘does’ weddings,barmitzvahs, family portraits,and indeed anything you wouldlike! Indeed he took picturesfor the Jewish Chroniclesupplement ….. and isversatile and can do any typeof snap your heart desires!

On the hobbies front singing isdefinitely number one. Hejoined the Synagogue Choirand the London Jewish MaleChoir late in the 60’s, and hasbeen with them for over 40years. He then had a briefstint with the London CantorialSingers, but because he waswith the Male Choir for their50th, 60th, 70th and 80thanniversaries (they wereformed in 1926), he went backin 2016 for their 90thanniversary and has beenthere since.

He was a member of AJEXand was on the Committee atWoodford, but unfortunatelythe branch had to close due tolack of members.

An ardent Shual goer, Arnoldattends Synagogue everyShabbat and sings in

the Choir

for all events and for Saturdayservices as well.

He and his wife did have aKing Charles Spaniel dog anda Persian cat for a number ofyears, but when the cat died ata venerable age of 16 theydecided ‘enough was enough’.

About BEEHIVE LANE …..there are approximately 70members and attendanceranges from 40-60 peopleeach time they meet. Thecommittee consists of a goodtreasurer, Les Barnett,programmer DennisAbrahams, Rose Nerdenhelping with the membershipand ladies who help with thetea and serving: Queenie, twoSylvia’s and Sheila. All in all everyone seems toenjoy the programme andmembers seem to prefersingers to speakers.

Finally – to end on a positivenote – the club, under Arnold’sleadership – is flourishing.Long may the bees be buzzingat Beehive Lane!

Angela Feuer

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It is impossible to be happy while one’s mother in law is still alive. Juvenal

Page12 PESACH

There have been periodsin recent history, whenthe political and

diplomatic backdrop has notalways been favourable, andsometimes extremelydangerous. But prayers havealways been said inJerusalem.

The Jewish community offertheir prayers at the WesternWall. Above them theMuslims pray in their holymosques in what is known asthe temple area. Christiansflock in their thousandsthrough the vast doors of thechurch of the Holy Sepulchre.

It has been said that if G-dlives anywhere, he must livein Jerusalem.

If politically Jerusalem is stillunfinished business,touristically its suddenchanges of ethnic pace arepart of the entertainment. Itmanages to be both familiarlywestern and tenaciouslymiddle-eastern, almost in thesame camera frame. And,where else outside theCommonwealth would therebe a King George Street.

We took a walk within thegreat city walls. Every alley

gave on to a surprise – asquare containing someRoman ruin, a new residentialdevelopment, a memorial.Turning a corner we were in afresh ethnic quarter; the OldCity’s delineations, Armenian,Muslim, Christian and Jewish,begin as suddenly asLondon’s China Town whenyou walk off St Martin’s Lane.

The main coast road rannorthwards. This one daycould be the littoral routethrusting through Lebanon,Syria, Turkey and intoEurope. But for the moment itcomes to an end just above

IF G-D LIVES ANYWHERE, HE MUST LIVE IN JERUSALEM

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I had a wonderful childhood, which is tough, because it’s hard to adjust to a miserable adulthood.Larry David

PESACH Page13

Acre, only a few miles to thenorth of that city.This stretch of road is full ofguide-book one liners. TheWingate Institute – namedafter British general OrdeWingate, of Chindit fame. –Netanya – speculativelynamed after the founder ofLevi Strauss whom the civicfathers targeted as a possiblebenefactor.

On past the formidableoutposts of Christian resolve,the now derelict Crusadercastles. We think of theCrusaders as heroes shiningout of our past, whilelackluster stand-ins like KingJohn ran the place. In the

Holy Land we meet them asinvaders in a place ofthunderous fortifications.

So, in a land so good atrepelling invaders, the onlyman allowed to stride ashoredecisively is Bill Gates ofMicrosoft, the name on thegleaming new hi-techfactories south of Haifa.

Onwards into Haifa, whichcommands a panoramic viewfrom the summit of MountCarmel of the spectaculargardens and golden dome ofthe temple dedicated to theBahai faith. Below the templeof one of the Mediterranean’sgreat bays with views towards

Acre, and that is as far as wecan see. Beyond Acre is theborder with South Lebanon.

It is never possible to shut outpolitical realities for long here,as the shores of the sea ofGalilee to the east areovershadowed by the GolanHeights close to the Syrianborder. In chill contrast to thebalmy air of optimism furthersouth, here in the north theaim seemed to crackle withtension. Some old woundsseem longer to heal thanothers.

Harry Fenton - Chigwell

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MICHAEL SKAPINKER, ASSOCIATE EDITOR, FINANCIALTIMES TALK AT JEWISH ASSOCIATION OF CULTURALSOCIETIES JACS IN HARROW ON 6 FEBRUARY 2018

Michael Skapinker is an FT contributing editor andcolumnist on business and society. He is alsoexecutive editor of the FT-IE Corporate Learning

Alliance, the FT’s executive education arm. Born in SouthAfrica, he began his journalistic career in Greece. He joinedthe FT in London in 1986 and has held many positions,including FT Weekend editor, FT Special Reports editor andmanagement editor.

He received the Work Foundation Members’ Award for hiscontribution to the understanding of working life in 2003 andwas named WorkWorld Media Awards Columnist of theYear in 2008. At the Editorial Intelligence Comment Awardshe was named Business Commentator of the Year (2012)and Business Ethics Commentator of the Year (2015).

Michael discussed issues including the future of the press.Photos kindly taken by Geoff Wolfson.

If I am selling to you, I speak your language. If I am buying, dann mussen sie Deutsch sprechen.Willy Brandt

Page14 PESACH

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THOUGHTS ON VALENTINE’S DAYMost publishers of printed cardsEmploy their own established bardsTo write the poems that they sellTo their assorted clientele.In letters falsely filled with goldTheir sentiments are but a mouldTo fit the minds of others, whoThe art of writing verse eschew,Who like to see their thoughts portrayedUpon a postcard, ready made.No wish, though thoughtfully expressed.No vow of love, whate’er the zest,Could ever totally disarmThe fair recipient, or charmThe reader, who is bound to thinkBut scornfully of printers ink,And lovers, seeking verse that theyMay to their sweethearts truths conveyWill not attract a sweet caressBy purchasing their tenderness.Should I then use a borrowed lineWhich might this day my thoughts defineCan words obtained with only cashBe valued little more than trashI could these printed poems hireAnd with a standard phrase aspireTo move her, but could ne’er impartThe deep emotion in my heartFor thoughts impersonally sharedHave their veracity impaired.The pen is mine, the words as well,For what commissioned scribe could tellThe treasures that my soul can seeHe has no purpose save his fee.Insentient poet! Can you traceA portrait of my loved one’s faceDescribe the way her blue eyes gleamWhen her sweet laughter fills my dream?To her alone my thoughts inclineTHEN I MUST WRITE HER VALENTINE!Danny Green – Harrow Mosaic JACS

Always tell the truth. It’s the easiest thing to remember. David Mamet

Page16 PESACH

Rimes wot we rote...

IF MY HEART COULD TALKCould it be the thought of spring time,That makes the living so worthwhile.Or rather more, the laughter, and thesunshine in your smile.

The poets always tell us, in those words that match and rhymeOf wonderful expressions that erase thelength of time.

Then someone rare and special Finds their way into your heart.And a brand new world you never knew has now began to start.

It’s time to count your blessingsAnd to mean those words you sayDon’t waste this golden moment,Here, at last, youv’e found your way.

David Rand – Southgate

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If you’re going through hell, keep going. Winston Churchill

PESACH Page17

MOO, MOO or MOOOO…..

The latest news on the agricultural front isthat farmers have claimed that cows mooin regional accents. Charles Saachi

expounded this theory in an article stating thatherds in the West Country are supposed tohave the distinctive Somerset twang, more of amoo-ar than just moo.

I spoke of this variation at a dinner party whereeveryone looked at me as if I was ‘dippy’. Myhostess immediately checked up on Google,and surprise, surprise my claim wassubstantiated. I was not, as yet, gaga! – atleast in so far of this.

In the Midlands, farmers claim that their beastsmoo with Brummie accents, while Geordie tonesare heard in herds up in Tyne and Ware. It isbelieved that cows pick up the accent from thefarmhands they are with for most of the time.

I find these different accents hard to reconcilewith the humble cow in diverse areas. If ahuman being speaks with a Brummie accent,for instance, how can he or she recognize thatthe animal has an accent as well? The onlyway is to scientifically record the moos fromcows in different areas and see if they differ.On the U.S. National Public Radio ‘How to doeverything’ podcast Sir Patrick Stewartentertained audiences when he was asked thequestion ‘What do English cows sound likewhen they moo?’ He explained that the dialectsof animals, like those of their humancounterparts, illustrate that theirs is a societydominated by class, social status and location.He went on to say that the sound made by acow from West Oxfordshire (an upper classarea frequented by many educated well-to-doindividuals) is quite an upper class braycompared to those from West Yorkshire.Brahma cattle’s initial home was that of Indiaand they moo differently from their Englishcousin with more of a brief bellow whereassome cows moo longer and louder.

Apparently in the USA, breeds that wereimported and bred in the South sound very

different to those in the North, just like theirhuman counterparts. It is true thatenvironmental influences can not only beattributed to humans but also to animals, andthere are many instances where animals areadopted and take on the characteristics ofwhom they are in contact with.

When I was in Spain, I regaled my family withthis concept, and so we tried to put it to the test.Would the cows moo with a Spanish accent?Sadly, even though we discovered a herd and Itried hard to get them to respond to my ownspecific English moo – they declined to evenlook in my direction, and the experiment wasdeemed null and void. Nevertheless, I amgoing to try again, armed with my trusty taperecorder. Perhaps my research will then jointhat of the West Country FarmhouseCheesemakers group who first reported thefluctuations in the cows’ notable different moos,backed up by the National Farmers Union andsupported by no less a personage as ProfessorJeanine Treffers-Daller at the University ofReading.

August company indeed……. Moo oo oo to youtoo!!

Angela Feuer

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I never travel without my diary. One should always have something sensational to read in the train.Oscar Wilde

Page18 PESACH

Who says faking isn’t the way forward? The UKhas produced some of the world’s mostprodigious art forgers. These are some of thisselect band.

John Myatt faked more than 200 works by theswiss abstract sculptor and painter Giacometti,using KY jelly and emulsion paint. He wasarrested in 1995 after a decade of profitablework, and sentenced to a year in prison wherehe was nicknamed – Picasso. After his releasehe became an artist in his own right.

Shaun Greenhalgh, assisted by hisoctogenarian parents and brother, copied worksby L S Lowry, Paul Gauguin and BarbaraHepworth. He fooled the art world for 17 yearsand was sentenced to a four year term inprison. He was released in 2010, and now hashis own art website.

Tom Keating said he forged Old Mastersincluding Renoir and Rembrandt in a protestagainst an art establishment that grew rich atthe expense of artists. Charges against himwere dropped due to ill health though hiscondition miraculously improved soon after!

Eric Hebborn passed drawings by artists suchas Van Dyck, Rubens and Breughol, but cameto a sticky end when he was murdered inRome.

Wolfgang Beltracchi got away with his forgeriesfor a long time, until he copied a painting byGerman expressionist Heinrich Campendonk,who died in 1957. The problem arose about hispainting ‘Red Painting with Horses’ which soldfor over a million pounds in 2006. ProfessorEstaugh who caught him out discovered thatthe master forger had made an error by usingtwo historically inappropriate colours. The mostimportant of which was titanium dioxide white –a pigment which wasn’t widely available in 1914when the painting was dated. Apparently whitetitanium wasn’t introduced until after 1916.Since his release from prison two years ago

Wolfgang has staged numerous solo exhibitionsand is regarded as a fine artist in his own right.Like the others above, his own signature nowappears on his work.

It is germane to note that all of this group couldhave been talented artists in their own rightinitially, but recognition and acceptance taketime. The alternative is to use onesconsiderable talent in forging – thus cocking asnoop at the art establishment, and gettingmillions in the process.

Finally, from my neighbour, two doors away – atitbit about Jago Stone, a cat-burglar (not sosuccessful as he was caught!) who became anartist when in prison and goes around thecountry painting peoples houses and sellingthem to the owners. My neighbour actually hasone of these watercolours of her house on herwalls. One does tend to wonder whether this isjust an excuse for ‘casing the joint’ …. But whoknows……………… (If you are interested inthis individual you can look him up on Google)

Angela Feuer

IF YOU WANT TO GET ON –FAKE IT!

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I wonder how many chameleons snuck on to the Ark. Adam Hess

PESACH Page19

MUSHROOMS ARE ALL THE RAGE FOR 2018Key predictions – a little bird told me for 2018 are that Brits will eat less meat and moremushrooms and powders. Soy will be numero uno on the list, and it is true that retailers arecashing in on the meat free trend. M&S is selling vegan, soy-based ‘beef mince and chickenchunks’; Sainsbury has vegan pizzas and sweets. The humble onion and garlic will grow inpopularity due to their prebiotics and there will be a rise in booze-free drinks. I have also noticedthat TV ads recently are promoting soy based sausages as healthier for kids, and they are soattractively portrayed that I am even thinking of getting some myself.

The colour purple is also having a terrific revival. It has always been associated with the ‘royals’,and thus has enjoyed some popularity – clotheswise, especially in the winter months, but nowfoodies are cashing in to its appeal withvegetables. Waitrose says it expects purpleversions of carrots, sweet potatoes, figs,cabbage and aubergines (which I think arepurple anyway!) to fly off the shelves. Wouldyou purchase these items yourselfeven if they are slightly moreexpensive? My contention isthat a sprout is just a sprouteven if it is a different shadebut I guess some folk might optfor the novelty factor.

RAYMOND’S ROUGE DE TOMATEA spicy soup for Pesach which is VERY EASY to make …….Ingredients: 2 tins of tomatoes – chopped and plum1 large carrot – cut up1 onion – finely chopped1 small potato 2 mushrooms3 pints waterMustard seeds (optional)Cumin seedsGround pepper to tasteAdd sugar/sweetener to tasteMETHOD: Put all ingredients in a large pot and bring to boil, then simmer untilvegetables are cookedTIP – If you have overseasoned your soup just add a raw cut potato to the mixtureand it will take away the overkill. Remember to remove the potato prior to servingthe soup!

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Inspiration usually comes during work, rather than before it. Novelist Madeleine L’Engle

Page20 PESACH

GOOD NEWS

x Mazel Tov to Terry Colinwho celebrated her 90thbirthday in great style.Northwood

x Mazel Tov to Helen andGerry Shapira on theirdiamond weddingcelebration – 60 years havepassed in a flash!Northwood

x Mazel Tov and heartiestcongratulations to a ‘with it’lady – Polly Davis who willbe 90 years old on 5 June.(Long may she do thecatering in her owninimitable style!) Woodside Park

x Mazel Tov to Arnold Rosewho is 86 years old – manycongratulations. Beehive Lane

x Mazel Tov to Minnie Allsutch102 years young! May we all be as ‘with it’ ather great age.Honorary Member atSouthgate JACS

x Mazel Tov to Pearl Ratnerwho PG was a venerable100 last September. A lovely lady at Northwood

x Mazeltov to Gloria Holmanwho has just had the newsthat she has a third greatgrandchild born in Israel. Woodside Park JACS

x Mazaltov to Terry and AlanColin for their 10th greatgrandchild Adina Leah.(They look so young Icannot believe it.)Northwood

x Mazel Tov and good newson the Feuer Family front –Adam Feuer who isattending WarwickUniversity has just beenselected to go to HongKong University for a year!A wonderful achievementand for making his wholefamily proud includingGrandma Angela.Northwood JACS

RISQUE JOKE!

After a long night of making love, the guy notices a photo of another man, on thewoman’s nightstand by the bed. He begins to worry. ‘Is this your husband?’ henervously asks. ‘No, silly,’ she replies, snuggling up to him. ‘Your boyfriend, then?’ he

continues. ‘No, not at all,’ she says, nibbling away at his ear. ‘Is it your dad or your brother?’he inquires, hoping to be reassured. ‘No, no, no! You are so hot when you’re jealous!’ sheanswers. ‘Well, who in the hell is he, then?’ he demands. She whispers in his ear... ‘That’s me before the surgery.’...

DOCTOR JOKE!Doctor: "I'm sorry but you suffer from a terminal illness and have only 10 to live."Patient: "What do you mean, 10? 10 what? Months? Weeks?!"Doctor: "Nine, eight, seven, six...."

BULL JOKE!A man asks a farmer near a field, “Sorry sir, would you mind if I crossed your field instead ofgoing around it? You see, I have to catch the 4:23 train.”

The farmer says, “Sure, go right ahead. And if my bull sees you, you’ll even catch the 4:11 one.”

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I love being a writer. What I can’t stand is the paperwork. Peter De Vries

LETTERS TO THE EDITOR

Dear Angela,✐ Wonderful journal – only just received it asI was in Israel.Best wishes, Gloria Holman

Dear Angela,✐ Congratulations on your excellent JACSJournal - I particularly liked your Editor’sMessage ‘Don’t worry, be happy’ as itreminded me of my South African friendswho said ‘today is the tomorrow youworried about yesterday. It has arrived andall is well.’ The variety you provide in thepublication is outstanding.Best wishes, Sheila Levitt – Stonegrove

Dear Angela,✐ I have just read the latest journal and youhave kept up with your previous highstandards. Well done.Best wishes, Joe Melnick – Northwood

Dear Angela,✐ Re Holiday in EastbourneIn potted version – the arrival was very wellorganized, and we were kept busy all daylong with activities. The sandwich luncheswere excellent and the afternoons saw agaggle of people playing cards, scrabbleand rummy. Every evening we hadentertainment which consisted offilmshows and dancing.

A wonderful time was had by all! Thank youmost sincerely Barbara and Harold for yourhard work in making the holiday such asuccess and so memorable.Best wishes, Cynthia Benjamin – Mill Hill

☎ Estelle Bernside of Northwood rang to sayhow much she enjoyed Vivienne Cowenand Harry Fenton’s article on How theInternet Started and thought the mag wasexcellent.

☎ I had a very nice phone call from agentleman by the name of Eddie Summersof Winchmore Hill who is a guest speakerand who has spoken at many of JACs’clubs. He wanted to be put on the mailinglist for the magazine as he found it veryinteresting and a good read. Eddie told methat he wrote a book called “EnoughAlready” which was very popular amongthe Jewish Fraternity, and he is a regularspeaker at various establishments. It isgood to know that JACs Journal is popularamong the wider public.

A TITBIT ABOUT GORDON BROWN

Seen in The Times – In his early days as an MP, Gordon gavea 45 minute speech on Pensions to a group of elderly Scots.When he finally sat down nobody clapped, and his host

apologized to the crowd because their food had gone cold.

“Why has everything gone wrong,” asked Brown.

“I spoke for 45 minutes, just like you asked.”The host replied: “I’m afraid I said four to five minutes, Mr Brown.”

PESACH Page21

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No matter how dirty your past is, your future is still spotless. Drake

No matter how dirty your past is, your future is still spotless. Drake

Page22 PESACH

A ROBOT THAT CAN ATTENDSCHOOL

The first person in Britain to receive such a robot isJade Gadd, 17, from Durham. She suffers from Ehlers-

Danlos syndrome,which leaves her bed

bound for weeks at a time.Now when she can’t get to

school, she can send her robot,nicknamed R2-Bee2 in her place.

Sitting on a desk, it will record everythingthat her teacher and classmates say. Relayingthe footage to her computer in real time, itallows her to ask and answer questions too.Created by a Norwegian firm called No Isolation the machine is thought to be the firstof its kind in the UK.

UNINSURED GEMSDid you know that pictures only get insured when

they go on tour? The cost to the Exchequer would beso huge, it couldn’t afford to pay for it. The safety of thepaintings rests on the vigilance of its staff. “The roomattendants are extremely highly trained in all sorts ofthings.” Says Rothschild “including how to interceptlunatics.” One of the most famous paintings in theNational Gallery is The Ambassadors, by Hans Holbeinthe Younger, painted in 1553. The picture was latelyestimated to be worth £200m, yet as the gallery’schairman, Hannah Rothschild, admitted – it isn’t insured.

Nor are any of the gallery’s other pictures! They only get insured when they go on tour. Makesone wonder whether it is worth insuring our personal possessions doesn’t it!!

BELFAST HOLIDAY DESTINATIONOne doesn’t naturally think of Belfast as a natural for ashort break but there is a lot to enjoy. Think ofexperiencing the world-class restaurants and pubs andvisiting the Titanic Belfast Museum which is a sensationalmemorial to the city’s maritime past. Combine thesepleasures with taking a Wee Tram Tour of the TitanicQuarter or catch a specialist taxi to the Shankill Roadwhere a driver who is part historian and part comediangives you the low down on where the guns have beensilent for nigh on two decades. I am advised that the tour is fascinating, lyrical and thought provoking…..VisitBelfast.com. Of course you can also visit Stormont as well. I thoroughly enjoyed Belfast – even morethan Dublin’s fair city.

Page 23: CHAIRMAN’S MESSAGE - jumpingjacs.org.uk JOURNAL 60.pdf · Woodside Park club. Barbara and I have attended six birthday parties for members who have celebrated their 100th birthday,

If ignorance is bliss, why aren’t there more happy people in the world? Stephen Fry

If ignorance is bliss, why aren’t there more happy people in the world? Stephen Fry

PESACH Page23

THE UNSAVOURY TRUTHABOUT SQUAREDANCING

People like square dancing. Itseems to appeal to all ages andparticularly so in the good old USA!Did you know that if you go to HighSchool in America the chances arethat at some point you’ll be madeto learn square dancing in gymclass. This is probably regarded asa quaint tradition, but the sad truthis that it owes more to America’slegacy of racism and anti-Semitism. The person responsiblefor so many pupils learning the do-si-do is the Founder of the FordMotor Company, Henry Ford whochampioned square dancing in the1920’s in the hope of counteractingwhat he believed as theunwholesome influence of jazz.Like Adolf Hitler, who mentionedFord approvingly in Mein Kampf,Ford hated Jewish people. Hebelieved that they invented jazz tocorrupt the masses. Consequentlyhe poured money into square

dancing, funded clubs andradio shows, publishedmanuals for aspiringinstructors, andcampaigned for thedance to be taught in

schools’ gymclasses.Despite hisefforts jazzprevailedtogether

with itsadversary squaredancing – both taking aplace of status in America– and deemed as‘wholesome as

American pie!’

PREHISTORIC REMAINSIN ISRAEL or WHAT BIGTEETH YOU HAVEGRANDMA

A fossil, a fragment of upperjawbone with several teeth, wasfound at Misliya Cave on MountCarmel in Northern Israel. Thefind increases the likelihood thatwe had contact with Neanderthalsand other hominins around thetime, possibly displacing them orbreeding with them. The teeth arebigger than most seen today butclearly recognizable as being froma member of our species, reportedin Journal Science. Otherevidence from the cave shows thatthe intrepid settlers were settling inafter journeying out of Africa anddoing their usual tasks such ashunting, lighting fires and using akit of stone tools. This discovery ofthe oldest human fossil foundoutside Africa has shown that thefirst wanderers left the continent atleast 175,000 years ago, 50,000years earlier than was known.

ARE THEY ADVANCED ORWHAT?A new London nursery is to offerMandarin classes for one yearolds. Safari Kid, which has openedin Islington, is an outpost of a chainfounded in Silicon Valley for thechildren of tech magnates. Pupilswill be taught about money andgiven pointers on public speaking.By the time they start school, thenursery says, they will be up to twoyears ahead of their peers. Arethey having us on?

BOTOX MAKESANYTHING BEAUTIFUL

A dozen camels have beendisqualified from an annual camelbeauty contest in Saudi Arabia,because their handlers used Botoxto make them even morehandsome. The pageant is part ofthe month-long King AbdulazizCamel Festival outside the capital,Riyadh. Prizes for all competitionstotal $57m, so the pressure tocheat is intense. Full, droopy lipsand large features – a look that canbe synthesized using Botox – arekey to success in camel beautycompetitions.

WHY IS IT CALLED THEPARROT POT?Try as I might Icannot see aconnection …this pot watersyour plants foryou – itmonitors howthirsty they areand tops themup with waterwhen theyneed it. Once you have filled thebuilt in reservoir, you can leave thepot for up to a month at a time. Itcosts £40 from www.parrot.com.

HELP!! MY PET ISLOST……..Do not despair,V-PET byVodafone ishere; you willnever losetrack of yourfurry companion with this connectedKippy tracker which can beattached to your dog or cat’s collar.It has built in GPS tracking and isable to keep you constantlyinformed (via a smartphone app) ofyour pet’s precise location. You canalso keep up to date with how youranimal feels with the Kippy Vita Swhich monitors your pet’s activity soyou know it’s healthy and happy.Big Brother is here for animals too!

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