Download - Conflict
OUT LINE
• What is conflict?• What is marital conflict?• What is the different between conflict resolution &
conflict Management? • What are the possible causes marital ?• Prevention/ resolution/management skills• Peace building
Nii Okley Botchway
Luke: 17: 1
• Conflict is part and parcel of the human the human existence. It is inevitable.
• Jesus said it will surely come.
• Nii Okley Botchway
What is conflict?
• Is the unfortunate coincidence or opposition, a violent collusion, contest or war.
• It is a mental or emotional struggle.
• It means to fight, contend to clash; to be unfortunately simultaneous
Nii Okley Botchway
What is marital conflict?
• Is the Collision on incompatible forces within a “life – space”
• In marriage setting the relevant “forces” could cover range eg. Inherent in the “gender” factor differences that is masculine/ famine co-existence and implicit psychological, emotional social cultural dimensions.
• Marriage being basically two individuals interacting within the limited confines of the bond holding them together, for the purpose of achieving a mutually accepted GOAL, it become almost inevitable that some points of conflict can rise between the two.
• Most likely sources of marital conflict may include:- Respectable family background
• Personal values
• - Role perception and
• - Personal expectation
• - Behaviors in terms of upbringing of children
• - Personal attitudes towards money,
• in –laws etc.
• Sexual intercourse
• Inordinate pride on part of either partner for example if one to social origins or financial status one feels superior to the other, this pride could develop into a tendency to magnify the perceived faults on the -weaknesses of the other
Problem of ambivalence that is latent hostility and the love-hate factor.
NEED FOR RESOLUTION MEASURES
• Any conflict is potentially destructive at many different levels and degrees of importance.
• The problem becomes even more serious when one partner can gain only at the expense of the other.
• NB: This becomes a sum – zero game in which there must be a loser. This can be very precarious in a marriage because any WIN-LOSE proposition is band to generate conflict.
• Conflict generates perceptional error and biased judgments; and if allowed to reach the boiling point it will be difficult to cool it off therefore.
OVERCOMING CONFLICT
• Marriage partners must understand that, combined; they form one superior entity (Eccl. 4:9) for instance, if they have some important task to do together OR to face some common crisis requiring their combined effort.
• If a Win – Lose conflict leaves no room for COMPROMISE or MERGER, then a MERATORmay have to impose a solution
( a family elder, respectable Minister, chief etc)
• NB: Role of a MEDIATOR can be truly depending on how he “performs” Either the couple in conflict will see him as practical, fair open – minded, impartial, honest etc
Eph. 4: 26-27,29, 32
• When you sin do not sin
• Don’t let the sun go down on your anger
• Your words should Gracious (Full of Grace)
• Remember you are one
• Walking in love, kindness, tender heartedness, forgiveness and so on
Peace building
It is much better
• To foresee it
• To read it off
• Not to require either partner to lose face