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Tuesday, February 28, 2012 The Herald

Tomorrow’s

HoroscopeBy Bernice Bede Osol

Annie says wife isa selsh mother

Dear Annie: My wifeand I have been married for20 years. She has a growndaughter from her first mar-riage. I watched “Lori” growup and love her as my own.

My wife always has been

fiercely defensive of Lori. Ican’t say anything remotelynegative or critical abouther without risking a bigargument. Even the sugges-tion of having Lori helparound the house or cleanup her room would causea fight. Lori is agood kid, but shehas never wantedfor anything. Mywife makes nosecret of the factthat Lori comesfirst in her life.

Lori is now inher early 20s andis a senior in col-

lege. Even thoughshe is taking onlytwo classes aweek, she doesn’thave a job andis unmotivated to get one.My wife makes all kinds of excuses for her. Meanwhile,we pay all of her expenses,including her rent.

I’m disabled and on asmall fixed income, and mywife is self-employed. Westruggle with our financeswhile Lori lives a carefreelife. It is causing friction inour marriage. We tried coun-seling, but my wife refusedto discuss anything related

to Lori and quit going.Lori calls her motherevery hour, and my wifeencourages it. Lori has noother friends, and all of mywife’s attentions are focusedon her daughter. I get verylittle. Is this normal behav-ior? -- Concerned for OurFuture

Dear Concerned: No,it’s not normal for a col-lege-age daughter to haveno friends but Mom, andfor a mother to encourageso much dependence. Suchan enmeshed relationshipis not only bad for yourmarriage. It also is crip-

pling for Lori. Instead of helping her daughter learnself-reliance, Mom is beingselfish by holding Lori soclose that she deliberatelyprevents her from becomingan independent adult. Wehope you can make yourwife understand that this ispoor parenting and in noone’s best interest.

Dear Annie: What is theetiquette when you go tosomeone’s home and it’soverly hot in the summerand too cold in winter?

A lot of my friends’homes are uncomfortable forme, and I have been asking

them to adjust their thermo-stats. A trusted pal recentlytold me she thought thiswas rude, especially when itdoesn’t trouble other guests.She suggested I wear layersand tough it out. What doyou suggest I do? -- TooHot or Too Cold

Dear Too: Wear layersand tough it out. Etiquettesays you don’t get to tellyour friends how to heat andcool their homes. And if youare the only one discom-fited by the temperature, the

problem is you and not thethermostat. Please see yourdoctor for a checkup.

Dear Annie: I had tosmile at the letter from“Road Worrier.” When westarted to get calls that our92-year-old father was driv-

ing through stopsigns and red lightsand running intocars in the park-ing lot, we gavehis car keys to hiscaregiver and saidshe’d take himwhere he neededto go.

When he died,

I sent his suit tothe funeral home.I later got a callsaying they founda car key in the

pocket. Later, we spoke toDad’s neighbor, who saidwhen the caregiver wouldgo to church on Sundays,my father would come outof the house five minuteslater, put his walker in thebackseat of the car and driveoff. He’d return 15 minutesbefore the caregiver cameback.

We don’t know where hewent for those four hours,but we’re glad nothing hap-

pened to him or anyone else.When they started to closehis coffin, I put that keyback in his pocket and toldhim, “OK, Dad, now youcan drive Mama all overheaven.” -- L.A.

Annie’s Mailbox is writ-ten by Kathy Mitchell andMarcy Sugar, longtime edi-tors of the Ann Landerscolumn. Please email yourquestions to anniesmail-box@comcast.net, or writeto: Annie’s Mailbox, c/oCreators Syndicate, 737 3rdStreet, Hermosa Beach, CA90254.

Annie’s Mailbox

www.delphosherald.com

WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 29, 2012

Improve upon what you’veaccomplished in the past by elevatingyour objectives and expectations in theyear ahead. You’ll be in an excellentachievement cycle during this period,but it’ll still be up to you to make themost of it.

PISCES (Feb. 20-March 20) --When left to your own devices, you’relikely to exercise a lot of initiativeand will accordingly get things done.Conversely, if you feel you’re beingpushed into doing something, you’llbalk.

ARIES (March 21-April 19)-- When dealing with a person withwhom you’ve had some kind of problem in the past, you’re likely tofocus only on what bugged you abouthim or her and not on the presentsituation.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20) --When other people’s assets are put inyour hands, consider it a sacred trust.Bend over backward to live up to theexpectations of those who have placedtheir faith in you.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20) --Be protective of your self-interest, butdon’t go to extremes about guardingyour position. Be willing to adjust tothe will of others when you believe itto be necessary.

CANCER (June 21-July 22) --

You’ll only have yourself to blame if you do things that you know will goagainst your best interest. Make sureyou fully consider the consequencesof your actions.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22) -- Youare generally a good shopper whenyou put your mind to it, but if someirresistible luxury items are dangled infront of you, all your good intentionscould quickly fly out the window.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) -- Donot leave the making of a personallyimportant decision totally up toanother. Abdicating your rights couldlead to complications that only youmight suffer.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23) --Co-workers will resent it if they feelthat you are acting in a superior waytoward them. If you’re not careful,you could quickly slip into this modewhen placed in a leadership position.

SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 22)-- It’s essential to make sure your

counterpart is a capable one whendealing together in a financial venture.You’ll need to work in harmony topositively affect the bottom line.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 23-Dec.21) -- You won’t be at your bestwhen forced to make a decision underpressure. Take control so that you’llhave time to weigh and balance thingsat your own pace.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan.19) -- Remember, you are the masterof your own fate when making andkeeping pledges to others. No onewill be forgiving if you break yourpromise and fail to do as you say.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 19)-- Relying on your hunches regardinga speculative risk is a bad idea. If youthink an irrational urge is instead anintuitive perception, you could getyourself in real trouble fast. COPYRIGHT 2012 United Feature Syndicate, Inc.