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Family Giving PlanA Practical Guide to Spend Your Life We ll
www.reachingforwardllc.com
Spring 2012
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Family Giving Plan
Your Familys Plan
A giving plan guides what you will do with what you have been given. Working on your plan provides an
opportunity for your family to consider its unique purpose so that you may strategically deploy family assets in
alignment with the family purpose.
Our giving plan is based on experiences over the past and guides how we make giving decisions. We moved from giving out of
compulsion to experiencing the joys and challenges of being an overseer.
Our actions are typically guided by our beliefs and values. Our
family history, family experiences and teaching are the mold that
forms a familys beliefs and values. Taking the opportunity to
discuss and discover your familys beliefs and values is
fundamental to living and giving on purpose. A corporation finds
its values to be fundamental as it forms strategy so that it can
deploy resources wisely. In a similar way, a family that knows
their values can chart life more meaningfully.
Purposeful, meaningful and courageous forward living is the end
game. Theres nothing better than operating in this zone.
However, the process and the new discussions that occur as a
family reflects on the past shared experiences and considers how
those experiences have shaped the individual family members
will bring new found depth and bonds. Many children have never
heard stories of their parents journey and many parents have
never heard about family life through the eyes of their children.
These discussions afford us a rich opportunity to share, learn and
grow.
The family giving map is a discussion guide for families to launch
into the great adventure of giving and growing together and build
a plan to live and give with purpose as a family.
My father is a story-teller. Our childhood was filled with his stories of how God had guided our family.
These stories established the foundation of who we are today.
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Taking the First Steps: The Setting
Creating a Great Discussion
Creating an atmosphere that is open to all ideas is vital. Approach
the conversations in a brainstorming style, allowing all ideas to
come forth, ones you agree with and ones you may not personallyembrace. This is difficult for those who know where they want to go
and want to get there quickly. For those who tend to hold back their
real thoughts; allow plenty of time. In working through the family
giving plan, you will address topics that if discussed in an open
forum will have great power to build understanding, insight and
ultimately appreciation for the varied and unique views and voices
within the family.
Tactically speaking, record what is shared. Allow value to be as-
signed to each individuals opinions. Recording or restating will ex-
press value for each thought and idea. You may want to record
thoughts using a whiteboard or have someone record notes during
the discussion.
Some families prefer having a moderator or close family friend to
facilitate the conversation. Some families choose to have the con-
versation while away at a family retreat or at the beginning of the
year during overall family goal setting or planning time. Choose a
location where family members will have time to listen & contribute
without distraction.
Establishing the family discussion as a tradition early in the familys history, sets the family giving discussion as a
favorite family activity and can guide their thoughts and behaviors over the course of the year and ultimately into
adulthood. Consider ways to make the interaction fun and inviting. One family we talked with made giving into a
game. By assigning a numeric value to pennies, each family member was given a stack of pennies to allocate to
organizations they liked. They not only had input, but had fun looking for organizations and participating in the
activity. Including videos or movies that talk about values and giving can help set the tone. See
www.reachingforwardllc.com for a list and links to videos. Generous Giving (www.generousgiving.org) is a great
resource for giving stories. A new organization, Ilikegiving.com also provides short video stories of the joys of
giving.
Think of your discussion as a river of water. The questions are the banks of the river, providing context for the
discussions. The water represents the conversation itself. The conversation will likely hit rapids, drops and
cascades over rocks as well as slow sections. Keeping the conversation flowing and it will yield the collaborative
input from the family necessary to discern and record your familys unique giving plan.
When my parents asked for my thoughts and my opinions, as a 14 year old, I felt respected. I felt valued.They invited my ideas and I was able to introduce new organizations into our family giving.
Now as a 30 year old parent, Im trying to do the same thing by including our children in our family values and giving discussions.
Imprinted on Our Heart
For God so loved He gave....
When we were born, God created us inHis image. His imprint on our heartscompels us to give, because He first
gave to us. So, when we give, we reflectthe Creators glory. Giving becomes amiraculous exchange shedding light onboth the giver and the receiver.
For God so loved He gave, therefore, wegive.
nnn
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Family Experiences & Beliefs
Experiences Talking through individuals perspectives of life experiences often sheds light on the variedviewpoints and ultimately can galvanize the family in what is valued, which will ultimately guide meaningful
living and giving. Discussion questions: How has your familys past shaped your family today? What
struggles have made the family stronger? What are you grateful for? Record the familys thoughts below.
AS A FAMILY, WE HAVE EXPERIENCED................................
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Beliefs Laying a solid foundation of your beliefs is essential in developing your convictions. Assurance of
our convictions allows us to live courageous and intentional lives. Consider the following discussion
questions: What does your family believe about how resources are to be used? What do you believe in
regards to how one is to steward resources (inclusive of financial capital, social capital, intellectual capital,
human capital, etc)? What beliefs did you see the previous generation live out and do you agree with those
beliefs? Record the familys thoughts below.
WE BELIEVE........................................................................
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Family Values
Values Next, consider what the family values as a result of experiences and beliefs. Below is a list to getyou started. Choose three to six values from the box below, or write in your own. You might have each
family member rank their top six and then look for commonalities.
AS A FAMILY WE VALUE
Acceptance
Accomplish-
mentAchievement
Adaptability
Adventure
Altruism
Assertiveness
Beauty
Belonging
Care for Others
Charity
Comfort
Commitment
Compassion
Completion
Confidence
Connection
Cooperation
Creativity
Curiosity
Dependability
Discipleship
Discipline
DiversityDreaming
Economy
Education
Effectiveness
Efficiency
Empathy
Encouragement
Entrepreneur-
ship
Evangelism
Excellence
Fairness
Faith
Fitness
Flexibility
Freedom
Frugality
Grace
Gratitude
Growth
Guidance
HappinessHarmony
Health
Holiness
Honesty
Honor
Hope
Humility
Humor
Imagination
Impact
Independence
Ingenuity
Inspiration
Integrity
Intelligence
Joy
Justice
Knowledge
Leadership
Longevity
Loyalty
Making A Dif-ference
Openness
Optimism
Order
Originality
Passion
Peace
Pragmatism
Precision
Preparedness
Recognition
Resourceful-
ness
Rest
Sacrifice
Security
Self-control
Self-reliance
Selflessness
Simplicity
Skillfulness
SpunkStillness
Structure
Support
Sympathy
Traditionalism
Tranquility
Trust
Trustworthiness
Unity
Utility
Virtue
Winning
Wittiness
Wonder
Youthfulness
Zeal
.................
.................
.................
.........
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Family InterestsNext, lets consider your familys unique interests and contribution. Based upon the giftedness of individual
family members how could the community be impacted because your family exists? What legacy will your family
leave?
Inventory Record your unique family interests and abilities. Typically, at this point one or more themes begin toemerge and often complementary abilities become recognizable. Each one is an individual and therefore you
might not have perfect alignment. Allow for individual expression.
O UR FAM ILY HA S BE EN GI FT ED IN TH E FO LL OW IN GAREAS........................................................................................................................
............................................................................................................
Dream Discuss the following questions: If our family could make a real difference with the resources we have,what would it be? What help would be given? What disease would be addressed? Who would be helped? What
are those areas that the family desires to see change? How will we prioritize the options?
WE WOULD LIKE TO HAVE AN IMPACT IN THE FOLLOWING
AREAS.................................................................................................
...........................................................................................................
GETTING OUR HANDS DIRTY: WAYS YOU CAN GIVE OF YOUR TIME.CHOOSE THOSE THAT ARE OF INTEREST TO YOUR FAMILY.
_____Board Membership_____ Volunteering as a Family at a Local Charity_____ Individual Participation with a Charity_____ Launching a New Initiative at a Charity_____ Partnering with a Charity thru a Family Business_____ Family Trips to Visit a Charity
_____ Influencing Others to Participate in Charity_____ Hosting an Event for a Charity_____ Starting a Family Foundation
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Family InterestsInviting your children into the conversation shows that you value their thoughts and ideas. As one adult ex-
pressed, when my parents asked me as a fourteen year old, where Id like to give, I felt respected and val-
ued. It caused me to begin to take greater responsibility for what God was entrusting to me. Thats when I
began to introduce new charities to my family.
You might ask your children, depending upon their age, to keep their eyes open for needs over a period of
time or let them research an area of interest or to read a book (such as The Hole in Our Gospel by Richard
Stearns or Radical by David Platt) before you come together to discuss.
One family we talked with provides an incentive to read certain books, while another family poses it as a re-
quirement for adult children before receiving their inheritance. Intentionally prioritizing great input into your
childrens hearts and minds at all ages of their lives is the key.
THEREFORE WE WILL GIVE OUR TIME, TALENT AND TREASURE TO-WARDS......
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Choose Sectors that are of interest to your
family and assign percentages to total 100%
_____% Arts and Culture
_____% Children and Youth
_____% Disaster Relief
_____% Discipleship
_____% Education
_____% Environment and Animals
_____% Evangelism
_____% Family
_____% Human Services and Medical
_____% Place of Worship
_____% Social Civic Public Policy
_____% Urban
_____% _______________________
_____% TOTAL (should be 100%)
Choose Locations that are of interest to your
family and assign percentages to total 100%
_____% In our Local Community
_____% In our Region
_____% In the United States
_____% Internationally:
Countries ___________________, ___________________, ___________________, ___________________, ___________________, ___________________, ___________________._____% TOTAL (should be 100%)0
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AFEW HELPFULTOOLS TO BUILD
PERSPECTIVE FOR
YOUR FAMILY,ARE LISTED BE-
LOW:
Deathclock.com
Not for the faint of
heart, but certainly a
dose of reality, receive
an estimate of your
remaining days, hours
and minutes based
upon age and health.
Globalrichlist.com
receive an estimate of
where your family
ranks in the world
based upon family
income.
Family Goals
We make a living by what we get, we make a life by what we give. Sir Winston Churchill
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Goals that together, we would seek to accomplish in giving resources
include:
OUR ANNUAL GIVING GOAL $.................................OR...............................%
OUR LIFETIME GIVING GOAL $.................................OR...............................%
OUR ANNUAL VOLUNTEERING GOAL ..................................................................................................................
..................................................................................
Now its time to consider what you are aiming for and set a few measurable goals. We have all heard thesaying, aim at nothing and you will probably hit it. Set realistic or stretch goals or both, it is your choice.
Use these questions to discuss giving financial resources or volunteering time. Consider the following
questions. Some families ask this questions of each one in private and come back to share together. Other
families arrive at these amounts after conversations with their financial advisors. Either way, having the
conversation brings unity and focus and direction for the family.
What amount can we give as a family? What amount would we like to give as a family?
What amount would we give if God blessed us with that amount?
What ways would we like to get involved with charities or charitable projects, either as a family or as
individuals?
What new family traditions would we like to begin?
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LIVING TOGETHER AND GIVING SEPARATELY
How many of us shared the same giving passions as our parents when we were younger? Likely,
very few of us. If we want to ignite a passion for giving in our young children or adult children, its
important to create environments where they may discover their individual interests and take steps
towards engagement. Consider a few ideas that have worked well for other families:
- Make memories for a lifetime. On your next business trip overseas, take your teenage son or
daughter along with you and spend a few extra days exploring organizations that work in the
area. Talk to non profit workers and discover what the people living there experience first hand.
Rely on each other in a foreign environment for a few days, developing a greater understanding
and appreciation for each other and your strengths and weaknesses.
- Add meaning into the week. Spend a few days of Spring Break working at a few local
organizations in your city. Involve the whole family or invite a few friends of your son or
daughter to join the adventure.
- Embrace uniquenesses. Ponder your son or daughters interests. Research organizations that
employ those interests to help others. Is it art? Consider a local organization that uses art to
teach and equip inner city youth. Invite your son or daughter to take a day off to visit and
volunteer with the organization. Is it sports? Consider a race with a group like Wounded
Warriors where they can meet men and women who have served our country with valor.
- Do something positive with the emotion. Notice the next time emotional energy comes into a
conversation with your son or daughter. Explore the source of the emotional energy and ask if
theyd like to get involved to do something about it.
- Invite intrigue into your home. Invite missions workers to stay in your home when they aretraveling through your city. Engage the family at meal time to hear stories of their experiences on
the front line.
- Sponsor life transforming experiences. Host your son or daughter to experience a volunteering
trip through a local church or school.
- Giving gifts that give life. Instead of gifts during holiday season or birthdays for each other,
consider offering to your son or daughter to pick gifts from a gift catalog offered by many non
profits. Compassion, Samaritans Purse, World Vision, Heifer International and others allow you
to purchase a gift of a farm animals, or surgery or books for a child in need.
- Give your son or daughter an amount for the express purpose of helping someone else.
Encourage them to use their intuition and prayerfully keep an eye open for people they can help.
Set a date by which they each report back on their giving experience.
Be creative and tap into the unique interests of your children. Provide margin to discover together
what gets them excited about good giving. Often we find something new about ourselves in the
process.
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Putting it all together
THESMITHFAMILYGIVINGPLAN
AS A FAMILY,WE HAVE EXPERIENCEDGREATJOYS,MANYBLESSINGSANDOPPORTUNITIESTOGROWASAFAMILY. HARDSHIPDUETOFAMILYILLNESSAND
EATHHASGIVENOURFAMILYAFRESHAWARENESSOFTHEPRECIOUSGIFTOFLIFE
ANDHASPROVIDEDUSWITHAPLATFORMFORENCOURAGINGOTHERSINASIMILAR
SITUATION. WEFEELTHISISAPLATFORMTHATWESHOULDSTEWARDWELL. WEHAVE
TRAVELEDTHEWORLDASAFAMILYANDHAVEWITNESSEDFIRSTHANDTHENEEDSOF
YOUNGPEOPLEANDFEELTHISISSOMETHING FOR WHICHWEHAVEANOPPORTUNITYTO
PROVIDESUPPORT. SEVERALFAMILYMEMBERSHAVEADOPTEDCHILDREN.
WE BELIEVETHATTHEFINANCIALRESOURCES,INDIVIDUALGIFTSANDABILI-TIESANDRELATIONALCAPITALSHOULDBEMANAGEDWELLSOTHATITSUPPORTSNOT
ONLYOURFAMILYBUTTHEWORLDAROUNDUS. WEBELIEVETHATWEAREMANAGERS
ANDNOTOWNERSANDTHATWESHOULDLIVESIMPLYSOTHATOTHERSMIGHTSIMPLY
LIVE.
AS A FAMILY WE VALUECHARITY,AGROWINGFAITH,ENTREPRENEURSHIP,TEACHING/LEARNING,CREATIVITY,HEALTH
OUR FAMILY HAS BEEN GIFTED IN THE FOLLOWING AREASOURFAMILYHASAHERITAGEOFTEACHINGANDEDUCATION. SOMEFAMILYMEMBERSARE
GIFTED WRITERSANDSPEAKERS. SOMEFAMILYMEMBERSAREGIFTEDIN
ENTREPRENEURSHIP.
WE WOULD LIKE TO HAVE AN IMPACT IN THE FOLLOWING AREAS
OURLOCALCOMMUNITYWITHHOLISTICHEALTHSERVICESFORCHILDRENWHO ARE ILL
PROVIDINGACUPOFWATERINTHENAMEOFCHRIST. WEWOULDLIKETOPROVIDE
BASICNEEDSOFYOUNGPEOPLEAROUNDTHEWORLDTHATAREUNABLETOCAREFOR
THEMSELVES. WEBELIEVEITISIMPORTANTTOHAVEFUNDSSETASIDETOHELPIN
GLOBALDISASTERSAND HAVE A PREFERENCE FOR ORGANIZATIONS THAT ARE FAITH BASED.
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THEREFORE WE WILL GIVE OUR TIME, TALENT AND TREASURE
TOWARDS......
OUR ANNUAL GIVING GOAL OURGOALISTOGIVE15%OFOUR GROSSINCOME.
OVERTHENEXTFIVEYEARSWEWOULDLIKETOSTRETCHTO20%.
OUR LIFETIME GIVING GOAL SHOULDGODSOPROVIDE,WEWOULDLIKETO
GIVE$1,000,000OVEROURLIFETIME.
OUR ANNUAL VOLUNTEERING GOALONEPROJECTPERFAMILYEVERYSIXMONTHS. WEWOULDLIKETOVISITANDWORKATONEOFTHECHARITIESWESUPPORT
INEITHERBRAZILORHAITI
_3__% Arts and Culture _10__% Children and Youth _5__% Disaster Relief _15__% Discipleship _10__% Education _2__% Environment and Animals _15__% Evangelism _5__% Family _15__% Human Services and Medical _20__% Place of Worship _0__% Social Civic Public Policy _0__% Urban _100__% TOTAL
_50__% In our Local Community _0__% In our Region _10__% In the United States _40__% Internationally: Countries
_100__% TOTAL
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THE___________GIVINGPLAN
AS A FAMILY,WE HAVE EXPERIENCED................................
.
WE BELIEVE........................................................................
AS A FAMILY WE VALUE
OUR FAMILY HAS BEEN GIFTED IN THE FOLLOWING AREAS...
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OUR FAMILY WOULD LIKE TO HAVE AN IMPACT IN ...............
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THEREFORE WE WILL GIVE OUR TIME, TALENT AND TREASURE
TOWARDS.....
Choose Sectors that are of interest to your
family and assign percentages to total 100%
_____% Arts and Culture
_____% Children and Youth
_____% Disaster Relief
_____% Discipleship
_____% Education
_____% Environment and Animals
_____% Evangelism
_____% Family
_____% Human Services and Medical
_____% Place of Worship
_____% Social Civic Public Policy
_____% Urban
_____% _______________________
_____% TOTAL (should be 100%)
Choose Locations that are of interest to your
family and assign percentages to total 100%
_____% In our Local Community
_____% In our Region
_____% In the United States
_____% Internationally:
Countries ___________________, ___________________, ___________________, ___________________, ___________________, ___________________, ___________________._____% TOTAL (should be 100%)
Goals that together, we would seek to accomplish in giving resources include:
OUR ANNUAL GIVING GOAL $.......................OR ..........................%
OUR LIFETIME GIVING GOAL $........................OR ..........................%
OUR ANNUAL VOLUNTEERING GOAL ..........................
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Updating Your PlanYour family giving plan is a living document intended to change over time. Often you will find your plan
becomes more refined over the years as your family discussions become more informed and concentrated
around the family values. Beginning a family giving plan when the children are young will help increase the
likelihood that planning to live and give on purpose becomes part of their future behavior.
Family dynamics will impact the plan. Some families agree to segment the family giving into individual
buckets by segmenting dollar amounts or separating responsibilities. This can be easily accomplished using
donor advised funds, a tool that performs much like a charitable checking account, holding charitable dollars
that will ultimately be distributed to charity. Some projects may be completed as a family while other
projects may be managed by a few family members. Some families set aside a certain amount in matching
gifts such that if adult children give, the family will match that gift. Persevere with flexibility to find what
works best with your family dynamic.
When the family regroups, preferably at least once a year, it is ideal to bring the summary of gifts made theprevious year along with letters from people that were impacted and stories from those in the family who
volunteered. It is a time to celebrate what was accomplished!
QUESTIONS FOR ANNUAL FAMILY MEETING
What went well (either according to plan or outside plan)? Share stories of impactful moments.
What would we do differently?
What are we glad we participated in last year?
Where did we see the most impact?
What impact measures will we use to decide on additional grants in the future?
What sectors were strong and what sectors did we give less than we had anticipated?
Are there adjustments to the plan, particularly in the sector and locational percentages?
Is there a different role or level of involvement for family members?
About Reaching Forward LLC: For individuals and organizations that desire to make a difference with their resources, Reaching Forward
guides strategic implementation for maximum charitable impact. The organizations name is based upon Philippians 3: But one thing I do,
forgetting what lies behind and reaching forward to what lies ahead, we press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in
Christ Jesus.
2011 Reaching Forward LLC. Opinions expressed do not constitute legal opinion, advice or counsel.
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