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Fruit-GatheringRabindranathTagore
TranslatedfromBengalitoEnglishbytheauthor
TheMacmillanCompany,NewYork,1916
I
BidmeandIshallgathermyfruitstobringtheminfullbasketsintoyourcourtyard,thoughsomearelostandsomenotripe.
Fortheseasongrowsheavywithitsfulness,andthereisaplaintiveshepherd’spipeintheshade.
BidmeandIshallsetsailontheriver.
TheMarchwindisfretful,frettingthelanguidwavesintomurmurs.
Thegardenhasyieldeditsall,andinthewearyhourofeveningthecallcomesfromyourhouseontheshoreinthesunset.
II
Mylifewhenyoungwaslikeaflower—aflowerthatloosensapetalortwofromherabundanceandneverfeelsthelosswhenthespringbreezecomestobegatherdoor.
Nowattheendofyouthmylifeislikeafruit,havingnothingtospare,andwaitingtoofferherselfcompletelywithherfullburdenofsweetness.
III
Issummer’sfestivalonlyforfreshblossomsandnotalsoforwitheredleavesandfadedflowers?
Isthesongoftheseaintuneonlywiththerisingwaves?
Doesitnotalsosingwiththewavesthatfall?
Jewelsarewovenintothecarpetwherestandsmyking,buttherearepatientclodswaitingtobetouchedbyhisfeet.
FewarethewiseandthegreatwhositbymyMaster,buthehastakenthefoolishinhisarmsandmademehisservantforever.
IV
Iwokeandfoundhisletterwiththemorning.
Idonotknowwhatitsays,forIcannotread.
Ishallleavethewisemanalonewithhisbooks,Ishallnottroublehim,forwhoknowsifhecanreadwhatthelettersays.
Letmeholdittomyforeheadandpressittomyheart.
WhenthenightgrowsstillandstarscomeoutonebyoneIwillspreaditonmylapandstaysilent.
Therustlingleaveswillreaditaloudtome,therushingstreamwillchantit,andthesevenwisestarswillsingittomefromthesky.
IcannotfindwhatIseek,IcannotunderstandwhatIwouldlearn;butthisunreadletterhaslightenedmyburdensandturnedmythoughtsintosongs.
V
AhandfulofdustcouldhideyoursignalwhenIdidnotknowitsmeaning.
NowthatIamwiserIreaditinallthathiditbefore.
Itispaintedinpetalsofflowers;wavesflashitfromtheirfoam;hillsholdithighontheirsummits.
Ihadmyfaceturnedfromyou,thereforeIreadthelettersawryandknewnottheirmeaning.
VI
WhereroadsaremadeIlosemyway.
Inthewidewater,intheblueskythereisnolineofatrack.
Thepathwayishiddenbythebirds’wings,bythestar-fires,bytheflowersofthewayfaringseasons.
AndIaskmyheartifitsbloodcarriesthewisdomoftheunseenway.
VII
Alas,Icannotstayinthehouse,andhomehasbecomenohometome,fortheeternalStrangercalls,heisgoingalongtheroad.
Thesoundofhisfootfallknocksatmybreast;itpainsme!
Thewindisup,theseaismoaning.Ileaveallmycaresanddoubtstofollowthehomelesstide,fortheStrangercallsme,heisgoingalongtheroad.
VIII
Bereadytolaunchforth,myheart!andletthoselingerwhomust.
Foryournamehasbeencalledinthemorningsky.
Waitfornone!
Thedesireofthebudisforthenightanddew,buttheblownflowercriesforthefreedomoflight.
Burstyoursheath,myheart,andcomeforth!
IX
WhenIlingeredamongmyhoardedtreasureIfeltlikeawormthatfeedsinthedarkuponthefruitwhereitwasborn.
Ileavethisprisonofdecay.
Icarenottohauntthemouldystillness,forIgoinsearchofeverlastingyouth;Ithrowawayallthatisnotonewithmylifenoraslightasmylaughter.
Irunthroughtimeand,Omyheart,inyourchariotdancesthepoetwhosingswhilehewanders.
X
Youtookmyhandanddrewmetoyourside,mademesitonthehighseatbeforeallmen,tillIbecametimid,unabletostirandwalkmyownway;doubtinganddebatingateverysteplestIshouldtreaduponanythornoftheirdisfavour.
Iamfreedatlast!
Theblowhascome,thedrumofinsultsounded,myseatislaidlowinthedust.
Mypathsareopenbeforeme.
Mywingsarefullofthedesireofthesky.
Igotojointheshootingstarsofmidnight,toplungeintotheprofoundshadow.
Iamlikethestorm-drivencloudofsummerthat,havingcastoffitscrownofgold,hangsasaswordthethunderboltuponachainoflightning.
IndesperatejoyIrunuponthedustypathofthedespised;Idrawneartoyourfinalwelcome.
Thechildfindsitsmotherwhenitleavesherwomb.
WhenIampartedfromyou,thrownoutfromyourhousehold,Iamfreetoseeyourface.
XI
Itdecksmeonlytomockme,thisjewelledchainofmine.
Itbruisesmewhenonmyneck,itstranglesmewhenIstruggletotearitoff.
Itgripsmythroat,itchokesmysinging.
CouldIbutofferittoyourhand,myLord,Iwouldbesaved.
Takeitfromme,andinexchangebindmetoyouwithagarland,forIamashamedtostandbeforeyouwiththisjewelledchainonmyneck.
XII
FarbelowflowedtheJumna,swiftandclear,abovefrownedthejuttingbank.
Hillsdarkwiththewoodsandscarredwiththetorrentsweregatheredaround.
Govinda,thegreatSikhteacher,satontherockreadingscriptures,whenRaghunath,hisdisciple,proudofhiswealth,cameandbowedtohimandsaid,“Ihavebroughtmypoorpresentunworthyofyouracceptance.”
Thussayinghedisplayedbeforetheteacherapairofgoldbangleswroughtwithcostlystones.
Themastertookuponeofthem,twirlingitroundhisfinger,andthediamondsdartedshaftsoflight.
Suddenlyitslippedfromhishandandrolleddownthebankintothewater.
“Alas,”screamedRaghunath,andjumpedintothestream.
Theteachersethiseyesuponhisbook,andthewaterheldandhidwhatitstoleandwentitsway.
ThedaylightfadedwhenRaghunathcamebacktotheteachertiredanddripping.
Hepantedandsaid,“Icanstillgetitbackifyoushowmewhereitfell.”
Theteachertookuptheremainingbangleandthrowingitintothewatersaid,“Itisthere.”
XIII
Tomoveistomeetyoueverymoment,Fellow-traveller!
Itistosingtothefallingofyourfeet.
Hewhomyourbreathtouchesdoesnotglidebytheshelterofthebank.
Hespreadsarecklesssailtothewindandridestheturbulentwater.
Hewhothrowshisdoorsopenandstepsonwardreceivesyourgreeting.
Hedoesnotstaytocounthisgainortomournhisloss;hisheartbeatsthedrumforhismarch,forthatistomarchwithyoueverystep,
Fellow-traveller!
XIV
Myportionofthebestinthisworldwillcomefromyourhands:suchwasyourpromise.
Thereforeyourlightglistensinmytears.
IfeartobeledbyotherslestImissyouwaitinginsomeroadcornertobemyguide.
Iwalkmyownwilfulwaytillmyveryfollytemptsyoutomydoor.
ForIhaveyourpromisethatmyportionofthebestinthisworldwillcomefromyourhands.
XV
Yourspeechissimple,myMaster,butnottheirswhotalkofyou.
Iunderstandthevoiceofyourstarsandthesilenceofyourtrees.
Iknowthatmyheartwouldopenlikeaflower;thatmylifehasfilleditselfatahiddenfountain.
Yoursongs,likebirdsfromthelonelylandofsnow,arewingingtobuildtheirnestsinmyheartagainstthewarmthofitsApril,andIamcontenttowaitforthemerryseason.
XVI
Theyknewthewayandwenttoseekyoualongthenarrowlane,butIwanderedabroadintothenightforIwasignorant.
Iwasnotschooledenoughtobeafraidofyouinthedark,thereforeIcameuponyourdoorstepunaware.
Thewiserebukedmeandbademebegone,forIhadnotcomebythelane.
Iturnedawayindoubt,butyouheldmefast,andtheirscoldingbecameloudereveryday.
XVII
Ibroughtoutmyearthenlampfrommyhouseandcried,“Come,children,Iwilllightyourpath!”
ThenightwasstilldarkwhenIreturned,leavingtheroadtoitssilence,crying,“Lightme,OFire!formyearthenlampliesbrokeninthedust!”
XVIII
No:itisnotyourstoopenbudsintoblossoms.
Shakethebud,strikeit;itisbeyondyourpowertomakeitblossom.
Yourtouchsoilsit,youtearitspetalstopiecesandstrewtheminthedust.
Butnocoloursappear,andnoperfume.
Ah!itisnotforyoutoopenthebudintoablossom.
Hewhocanopenthebuddoesitsosimply.
Hegivesitaglance,andthelife-sapstirsthroughitsveins.
Athisbreaththeflowerspreadsitswingsandfluttersinthewind.
Coloursflushoutlikeheart-longings,theperfumebetraysasweetsecret.
Hewhocanopenthebuddoesitsosimply.
XIX
Sudâs,thegardener,pluckedfromhistankthelastlotusleftbytheravageofwinterandwenttosellittothekingatthepalacegate.
Therehemetatravellerwhosaidtohim,“Askyourpriceforthelastlotus,—IshallofferittoLordBuddha.”
Sudâssaid,“Ifyoupayonegoldenmâshâitwillbeyours.”
Thetravellerpaidit.
Atthatmomentthekingcameoutandhewishedtobuytheflower,forhewasonhiswaytoseeLordBuddha,andhethought,“Itwouldbeafinethingtolayathisfeetthelotusthatbloomedinwinter.”
Whenthegardenersaidhehadbeenofferedagoldenmâshâthekingofferedhimten,butthetravellerdoubledtheprice.
Thegardener,beinggreedy,imaginedagreatergainfromhimforwhosesaketheywerebidding.Hebowedandsaid,“Icannotsellthislotus.”
InthehushedshadeofthemangogrovebeyondthecitywallSudâsstoodbeforeLordBuddha,onwhoselipssatthesilenceofloveandwhoseeyesbeamedpeacelikethemorningstarofthedew-washedautumn.
Sudâslookedinhisfaceandputthelotusathisfeetandbowedhisheadtothedust.
Buddhasmiledandasked,“Whatisyourwish,myson?”
Sudâscried,“Theleasttouchofyourfeet.”
XX
Makemethypoet,ONight,veiledNight!
Therearesomewhohavesatspeechlessforagesinthyshadow;letmeuttertheirsongs.
Takemeuponthychariotwithoutwheels,runningnoiselesslyfromworldtoworld,thouqueeninthepalaceoftime,thoudarklybeautiful!
Manyaquestioningmindhasstealthilyenteredthycourtyardandroamedthroughthylamplesshouseseekingforanswers.
Frommanyaheart,piercedwiththearrowofjoyfromthehandsoftheUnknown,haveburstforthgladchants,shakingthedarknesstoitsfoundation.
Thosewakefulsoulsgazeinthestarlightinwonderatthetreasuretheyhavesuddenlyfound.
Makemetheirpoet,ONight,thepoetofthyfathomlesssilence.
XXI
IwillmeetonedaytheLifewithinme,thejoythathidesinmylife,thoughthedaysperplexmypathwiththeiridledust.
Ihaveknownitinglimpses,anditsfitfulbreathhascomeuponme,makingmythoughtsfragrantforawhile.
IwillmeetonedaytheJoywithoutmethatdwellsbehindthescreenoflight—andwillstandintheoverflowingsolitudewhereallthingsareseenasbytheircreator.
XXII
Thisautumnmorningistiredwithexcessoflight,andifyoursongsgrowfitfulandlanguidgivemeyourfluteawhile.
Ishallbutplaywithitasthewhimtakesme,—nowtakeitonmylap,nowtouchitwith
mylips,nowkeepitbymysideonthegrass.
ButinthesolemneveningstillnessIshallgatherflowers,todeckitwithwreaths,Ishallfillitwithfragrance;Ishallworshipitwiththelightedlamp.
ThenatnightIshallcometoyouandgiveyoubackyourflute.
Youwillplayonitthemusicofmidnightwhenthelonelycrescentmoonwandersamongthestars.
XXIII
Thepoet’smindfloatsanddancesonthewavesoflifeamidstthevoicesofwindandwater.
Nowwhenthesunhassetandthedarkenedskydrawsuponthesealikedroopinglashesuponawearyeyeitistimetotakeawayhispen,andlethisthoughtssinkintothebottomofthedeepamidtheeternalsecretofthatsilence.
XXIV
Thenightisdarkandyourslumberisdeepinthehushofmybeing.
Wake,OPainofLove,forIknownothowtoopenthedoor,andIstandoutside.
Thehourswait,thestarswatch,thewindisstill,thesilenceisheavyinmyheart.
Wake,Love,wake!brimmyemptycup,andwithabreathofsongrufflethenight.
XXV
Thebirdofthemorningsings.
Whencehashewordofthemorningbeforethemorningbreaks,andwhenthedragonnightstillholdstheskyinitscoldblackcoils?
Tellme,birdofthemorning,how,throughthetwofoldnightoftheskyandtheleaves,hefoundhiswayintoyourdream,themessengeroutoftheeast?
Theworlddidnotbelieveyouwhenyoucried,“Thesunisonhisway,thenightisnomore.”
Osleeper,awake!
Bareyourforehead,waitingforthefirstblessingoflight,andsingwiththebirdofthemorningingladfaith.
XXVI
Thebeggarinmeliftedhisleanhandstothestarlessskyandcriedintonight’searwithhishungryvoice.
HisprayersweretotheblindDarknesswholaylikeafallengodinadesolateheavenoflosthopes.
Thecryofdesireeddiedroundachasmofdespair,awailingbirdcirclingitsemptynest.
ButwhenmorningdroppedanchorattherimoftheEast,thebeggarinmeleaptandcried:
“BlessedamIthatthedeafnightdeniedme—thatitscofferwasempty.”
Hecried,“OLife,OLight,youareprecious!andpreciousisthejoythatatlasthasknownyou!”
XXVII
SanâtanwastellinghisbeadsbytheGangeswhenaBrahmininragscametohimandsaid,“Helpme,Iampoor!”
“Myalms-bowlisallthatismyown,”saidSanâtan,“IhavegivenawayeverythingIhad.”
“ButmylordShivacametomeinmydreams,”saidtheBrahmin,“andcounselledmetocometoyou.”
Sanâtansuddenlyrememberedhehadpickedupastonewithoutpriceamongthepebblesontheriver-bank,andthinkingthatsomeonemightneedithiditinthesands.
HepointedoutthespottotheBrahmin,whowonderingdugupthestone.
TheBrahminsatontheearthandmusedalonetillthesunwentdownbehindthetrees,andcowherdswenthomewiththeircattle.
ThenheroseandcameslowlytoSanâtanandsaid,“Master,givemetheleastfractionofthewealththatdisdainsallthewealthoftheworld.”
Andhethrewthepreciousstoneintothewater.
XXVIII
TimeaftertimeIcametoyourgatewithraisedhands,askingformoreandyetmore.
Yougaveandgave,nowinslowmeasure,nowinsuddenexcess.
Itooksome,andsomethingsIletdrop;somelayheavyonmyhands;someImadeintoplaythingsandbrokethemwhentired;tillthewrecksandthehoardofyourgiftsgrewimmense,hidingyou,andtheceaselessexpectationworemyheartout.
Take,ohtake—hasnowbecomemycry.
Shatterallfromthisbeggar’sbowl:putoutthislampoftheimportunatewatcher:holdmyhands,raisemefromthestill-gatheringheapofyourgiftsintothebareinfinityofyouruncrowdedpresence.
XXIX
Youhavesetmeamongthosewhoaredefeated.
Iknowitisnotformetowin,nortoleavethegame.
Ishallplungeintothepoolalthoughbuttosinktothebottom.
Ishallplaythegameofmyundoing.
IshallstakeallIhaveandwhenIlosemylastpennyIshallstakemyself,andthenIthinkIshallhavewonthroughmyutterdefeat.
XXX
Asmileofmirthspreadovertheskywhenyoudressedmyheartinragsandsentherforthintotheroadtobeg.
Shewentfromdoortodoor,andmanyatimewhenherbowlwasnearlyfullshewasrobbed.
Attheendofthewearydayshecametoyourpalacegateholdingupherpitifulbowl,andyoucameandtookherhandandseatedherbesideyouonyourthrone.
XXXI
“Whoamongyouwilltakeupthedutyoffeedingthehungry?”LordBuddhaaskedhisfollowerswhenfamineragedatShravasti.
Ratnâkar,thebanker,hunghisheadandsaid,“Muchmoreisneededthanallmywealthtofeedthehungry.”
Jaysen,thechiefoftheKing’sarmy,said,“Iwouldgladlygivemylife’sblood,butthereisnotenoughfoodinmyhouse.”
Dharmapâal,whoownedbroadacresofland,saidwithasigh,“Thedroughtdemonhassuckedmyfieldsdry.IknownothowtopayKing’sdues.”
ThenroseSupriyâ,themendicant’sdaughter.
Shebowedtoallandmeeklysaid,“Iwillfeedthehungry.”
“How!”theycriedinsurprise.“Howcanyouhopetofulfilthatvow?”
“Iamthepoorestofyouall,”saidSupriyâ,“thatismystrength.Ihavemycofferandmystoreateachofyourhouses.”
XXXII
Mykingwasunknowntome,thereforewhenheclaimedhistributeIwasboldtothinkIwouldhidemyselfleavingmydebtsunpaid.
Ifledandfledbehindmyday’sworkandmynight’sdreams.
ButhisclaimsfollowedmeateverybreathIdrew.
ThusIcametoknowthatIamknowntohimandnoplaceleftwhichismine.
NowIwishtolaymyallbeforehisfeet,andgaintherighttomyplaceinhiskingdom.
XXXIII
WhenIthoughtIwouldmouldyou,animagefrommylifeformentoworship,Ibroughtmydustanddesiresandallmycoloureddelusionsanddreams.
WhenIaskedyoutomouldwithmylifeanimagefromyourheartforyoutolove,youbroughtyourfireandforce,andtruth,lovelinessandpeace.
XXXIV
“Sire,”announcedtheservanttotheKing,“thesaintNarottamhasneverdeignedtoenteryourroyaltemple.
“HeissingingGod’spraiseunderthetreesbytheopenroad.Thetempleisemptyofworshippers.
“Theyflockroundhimlikebeesroundthewhitelotus,leavingthegoldenjarofhoneyunheeded.”
TheKing,vexedatheart,wenttothespotwhereNarottamsatonthegrass.
Heaskedhim,“Father,whyleavemytempleofthegoldendomeandsitonthedustoutsidetopreachGod’slove?”
“BecauseGodisnotthereinyourtemple,”saidNarottam.
TheKingfrownedandsaid,“Doyouknow,twentymillionsofgoldwenttothemakingofthatmarvelofart,anditwasconsecratedtoGodwithcostlyrites?”
“Yes,Iknowit,”answeredNarottam.“Itwasinthatyearwhenthousandsofyourpeoplewhosehouseshadbeenburnedstoodvainlyaskingforhelpatyourdoor.
“AndGodsaid,‘Thepoorcreaturewhocangivenosheltertohisbrotherswouldbuildmyhouse!’
“Andhetookhisplacewiththeshelterlessunderthetreesbytheroad.
“Andthatgoldenbubbleisemptyofallbuthotvapourofpride.”
TheKingcriedinanger,“Leavemyland.”
Calmlysaidthesaint,“Yes,banishmewhereyouhavebanishedmyGod.”
XXXV
Thetrumpetliesinthedust.
Thewindisweary,thelightisdead.
Ah,theevilday!
Come,fighters,carryingyourflags,andsingers,withyourwar-songs!
Come,pilgrimsofthemarch,hurryingonyourjourney!
Thetrumpetliesinthedustwaitingforus.
Iwasonmywaytothetemplewithmyeveningofferings,seekingforaplaceofrestaftertheday’sdustytoil:hopingmyhurtswouldbehealedandthestainsinmygarmentwashedwhite,whenIfoundthytrumpetlyinginthedust.
Wasitnotthehourformetolightmyeveninglamp?
Hadnotthenightsungitslullabytothestars?
Othoublood-redrose,mypoppiesofsleephavepaledandfaded!
IwascertainmywanderingswereoverandmydebtsallpaidwhensuddenlyIcameuponthytrumpetlyinginthedust.
Strikemydrowsyheartwiththyspellofyouth!
Letmyjoyinlifeblazeupinfire.Lettheshaftsofawakeningflythroughtheheartofnight,andathrillofdreadshakeblindnessandpalsy.
Ihavecometoraisethytrumpetfromthedust.
Sleepisnomoreforme—mywalkshallbethroughshowersofarrows.
Someshallrunoutoftheirhousesandcometomyside—someshallweep.
Someintheirbedsshalltossandgroanindiredreams.
Forto-nightthytrumpetshallbesounded.
FromtheeIhaveaskedpeaceonlytofindshame.
NowIstandbeforethee—helpmetoputonmyarmour!
Lethardblowsoftroublestrikefireintomylife.
Letmyheartbeatinpain,thedrumofthyvictory.
Myhandsshallbeutterlyemptiedtotakeupthytrumpet.
XXXVI
When,madintheirmirth,theyraiseddusttosoilthyrobe,OBeautiful,itmademyheartsick.
Icriedtotheeandsaid,“Takethyrodofpunishmentandjudgethem.”
Themorninglightstruckuponthoseeyes,redwiththerevelofnight;theplaceofthewhitelilygreetedtheirburningbreath;thestarsthroughthedepthofthesacreddarkstaredattheircarousing—atthosethatraiseddusttosoilthyrobe,OBeautiful!
Thyjudgmentseatwasintheflowergarden,inthebirds’notesinspringtime:intheshadyriver-banks,wherethetreesmutteredinanswertothemutteringofthewaves.
OmyLover,theywerepitilessintheirpassion.
Theyprowledinthedarktosnatchthyornamentstodecktheirowndesires.
Whentheyhadstrucktheeandthouwertpained,itpiercedmetothequick,andIcriedtotheeandsaid,“Takethysword,OmyLover,andjudgethem!”
Ah,butthyjusticewasvigilant.
Amother’stearswereshedontheirinsolence;theimperishablefaithofaloverhidtheirspearsofrebellioninitsownwounds.
Thyjudgmentwasinthemutepainofsleeplesslove:intheblushofthechaste:inthetearsofthenightofthedesolate:inthepalemorning-lightofforgiveness.
OTerrible,theyintheirrecklessgreedclimbedthygateatnight,breakingintothystorehousetorobthee.
Buttheweightoftheirplundergrewimmense,tooheavytocarryortoremove.
ThereuponIcriedtotheeandsaid,Forgivethem,OTerrible!
Thyforgivenessburstinstorms,throwingthemdown,scatteringtheirtheftsinthedust.
Thyforgivenesswasinthethunder-stone;intheshowerofblood;intheangryredofthesunset.
XXXVII
Upagupta,thediscipleofBuddha,layasleeponthedustbythecitywallofMathura.
Lampswereallout,doorswereallshut,andstarswereallhiddenbythemurkyskyofAugust.
Whosefeetwerethosetinklingwithanklets,touchinghisbreastofasudden?
Hewokeupstartled,andthelightfromawoman’slampstruckhisforgivingeyes.
Itwasthedancinggirl,starredwithjewels,cloudedwithapale-bluemantle,drunkwiththewineofheryouth.
Sheloweredherlampandsawtheyoungface,austerelybeautiful.
“Forgiveme,youngascetic,”saidthewoman;“graciouslycometomyhouse.Thedustyearthisnotafitbedforyou.”
Theasceticanswered,“Woman,goonyourway;whenthetimeisripeIwillcometoyou.”
Suddenlytheblacknightshoweditsteethinaflashoflightning.
Thestormgrowledfromthecornerofthesky,andthewomantrembledinfear.
……
Thebranchesofthewaysidetreeswereachingwithblossom.
Gaynotesoftheflutecamefloatinginthewarmspringairfromafar.
Thecitizenshadgonetothewoods,tothefestivalofflowers.
Fromthemid-skygazedthefullmoonontheshadowsofthesilenttown.
Theyoungasceticwaswalkinginthelonelystreet,whileoverheadthelovesickkoelsurgedfromthemangobranchestheirsleeplessplaint.
Upaguptapassedthroughthecitygates,andstoodatthebaseoftherampart.
Whatwomanlayintheshadowofthewallathisfeet,struckwiththeblackpestilence,herbodyspottedwithsores,hurriedlydrivenawayfromthetown?
Theasceticsatbyherside,takingherheadonhisknees,andmoistenedherlipswithwaterandsmearedherbodywithbalm.
“Whoareyou,mercifulone?”askedthewoman.
“Thetime,atlast,hascometovisityou,andIamhere,”repliedtheyoungascetic.
XXXVIII
Thisisnomeredallyingoflovebetweenus,mylover.
Againandagainhaveswoopeddownuponmethescreamingnightsofstorm,blowingoutmylamp:darkdoubtshavegathered,blottingoutallstarsfrommysky.
Againandagainthebankshaveburst,lettingthefloodsweepawaymyharvest,andwailinganddespairhaverentmyskyfromendtoend.
ThishaveIlearntthatthereareblowsofpaininyourlove,neverthecoldapathyofdeath.
XXXIX
Thewallbreaksasunder,light,likedivinelaughter,burstsin.Victory,OLight!
Theheartofthenightispierced!
Withyourflashingswordcutintwainthetangleofdoubtandfeebledesires!
Victory!
Come,Implacable!
Come,youwhoareterribleinyourwhiteness.
OLight,yourdrumsoundsinthemarchoffire,andtheredtorchisheldonhigh;deathdiesinaburstofsplendour!
XL
Ofire,mybrother,Isingvictorytoyou.
Youarethebrightredimageoffearfulfreedom.
Youswingyourarmsinthesky,yousweepyourimpetuousfingersacrosstheharp-string,yourdancemusicisbeautiful.
Whenmydaysareendedandthegatesareopenedyouwillburntoashesthiscordageofhandsandfeet.
Mybodywillbeonewithyou,myheartwillbecaughtinthewhirlsofyourfrenzy,andtheburningheatthatwasmylifewillflashupandmingleitselfinyourflame.
XLI
TheBoatmanisoutcrossingthewildseaatnight.
Themastisachingbecauseofitsfullsailsfilledwiththeviolentwind.
Stungwiththenight’sfangtheskyfallsuponthesea,poisonedwithblackfear.
Thewavesdashtheirheadsagainstthedarkunseen,andtheBoatmanisoutcrossingthewildsea.
TheBoatmanisout,Iknownotforwhattryst,startlingthenightwiththesuddenwhiteofhissails.
Iknownotatwhatshore,atlast,helandstoreachthesilentcourtyardwherethelampisburningandtofindherwhositsinthedustandwaits.
Whatisthequestthatmakeshisboatcarenotforstormnordarkness?
Isitheavywithgemsandpearls?
Ah,no,theBoatmanbringswithhimnotreasure,butonlyawhiteroseinhishandandasongonhislips.
Itisforherwhowatchesaloneatnightwithherlampburning.
Shedwellsinthewaysidehut.Herloosehairfliesinthewindandhideshereyes.
Thestormshrieksthroughherbrokendoors,thelightflickersinherearthenlampflingingshadowsonthewalls.
Throughthehowlofthewindsshehearshimcallhername,shewhosenameisunknown.
ItislongsincetheBoatmansailed.Itwillbelongbeforethedaybreaksandheknocksatthedoor.
Thedrumswillnotbebeatenandnonewillknow.
Onlylightshallfillthehouse,blessedshallbethedust,andtheheartglad.
AlldoubtsshallvanishinsilencewhentheBoatmancomestotheshore.
XLII
Iclingtothislivingraft,mybody,inthenarrowstreamofmyearthlyyears.
Ileaveitwhenthecrossingisover.Andthen?
Idonotknowifthelightthereandthedarknessarethesame.
TheUnknownistheperpetualfreedom:
Heispitilessinhislove.
Hecrushestheshellforthepearl,dumbintheprisonofthedark.
Youmuseandweepforthedaysthataredone,poorheart!
Begladthatdaysaretocome!
Thehourstrikes,Opilgrim!
Itistimeforyoutotakethepartingoftheways!
Hisfacewillbeunveiledonceagainandyoushallmeet.
XLIII
OvertherelicofLordBuddhaKingBimbisârbuiltashrine,asalutationinwhitemarble.
ThereintheeveningwouldcomeallthebridesanddaughtersoftheKing’shousetoofferflowersandlightlamps.
Whenthesonbecamekinginhistimehewashedhisfather’screedawaywithblood,andlitsacrificialfireswithitssacredbooks.
Theautumndaywasdying.Theeveninghourofworshipwasnear.
Shrimati,thequeen’smaid,devotedtoLordBuddha,havingbathedinholywater,anddeckedthegoldentraywithlampsandfreshwhiteblossoms,silentlyraisedherdarkeyestothequeen’sface.
Thequeenshudderedinfearandsaid,“Doyounotknow,foolishgirl,thatdeathisthepenaltyforwhoeverbringsworshiptoBuddha’sshrine?
“Suchistheking’swill.”
Shrimatibowedtothequeen,andturningawayfromherdoorcameandstoodbeforeAmitâ,thenewlywedbrideoftheking’sson.
Amirrorofburnishedgoldonherlap,thenewlywedbridewasbraidingherdarklongtressesandpaintingtheredspotofgoodluckatthepartingofherhair.
Herhandstrembledwhenshesawtheyoungmaid,andshecried,“Whatfearfulperilwouldyoubringme!Leavemethisinstant.”
PrincessShuklâsatatthewindowreadingherbookofromancebythelightofthesettingsun.
Shestartedwhenshesawatherdoorthemaidwiththesacredofferings.
Herbookfelldownfromherlap,andshewhisperedinShrimati’sears,“Rushnottodeath,daringwoman!”
Shrimatiwalkedfromdoortodoor.Sheraisedherheadandcried,“Owomenoftheking’shouse,hasten!
“ThetimeforourLord’sworshipiscome!”
Someshuttheirdoorsinherfaceandsomereviledher.
Thelastgleamofdaylightfadedfromthebronzedomeofthepalacetower.
Deepshadowssettledinstreetcorners:thebustleofthecitywashushed:thegongatthetempleofShivaannouncedthetimeoftheeveningprayer.
Inthedarkoftheautumnevening,deepasalimpidlake,starsthrobbedwithlight,whentheguardsofthepalacegardenwerestartledtoseethroughthetreesarowoflampsburningattheshrineofBuddha.
Theyranwiththeirswordsunsheathed,crying,“Whoareyou,foolishone,recklessofdeath?”
“IamShrimati,”repliedasweetvoice,“theservantofLordBuddha.”
Thenextmomentherheart’sbloodcolouredthecoldmarblewithitsred.
Andinthestillhourofstarsdiedthelightofthelastlampofworshipatthefootoftheshrine.
XLIV
Thedaythatstandsbetweenyouandmemakesherlastbowoffarewell.
Thenightdrawsherveiloverherface,andhidestheonelampburninginmychamber.
Yourdarkservantcomesnoiselesslyandspreadsthebridalcarpetforyoutotakeyourseattherealonewithmeinthewordlesssilencetillnightisdone.
XLV
Mynighthaspassedonthebedofsorrow,andmyeyesaretired.Myheavyheartisnotyetreadytomeetmorningwithitscrowdedjoys.
Drawaveiloverthisnakedlight,beckonasidefrommethisglaringflashanddanceoflife.
Letthemantleoftenderdarknesscovermeinitsfolds,andcovermypainawhilefromthepressureoftheworld.
XLVI
ThetimeispastwhenIcouldrepayherforallthatIreceived.
Hernighthasfounditsmorningandthouhasttakenhertothyarms:andtotheeIbringmygratitudeandmygiftsthatwereforher.
ForallhurtsandoffencestoherIcometotheeforforgiveness.
Ioffertothyservicethoseflowersofmylovethatremainedinbudwhenshewaitedforthemtoopen.
XLVII
Ifoundafewoldlettersofminecarefullyhiddeninherbox—afewsmalltoysforher
memorytoplaywith.
Withatimorousheartshetriedtostealthesetriflesfromtime’sturbulentstream,andsaid,“Thesearemineonly!”
Ah,thereisnoonenowtoclaimthem,whocanpaytheirpricewithlovingcare,yetheretheyarestill.
Surelythereisloveinthisworldtosaveherfromutterloss,evenlikethisloveofhersthatsavedtheseletterswithsuchfondcare.
XLVIII
Bringbeautyandorderintomyforlornlife,woman,asyoubroughtthemintomyhousewhenyoulived.
Sweepawaythedustyfragmentsofthehours,filltheemptyjars,andmendallthathasbeenneglected.
Thenopentheinnerdooroftheshrine,lightthecandle,andletusmeetthereinsilencebeforeourGod.
XLIX
Thepainwasgreatwhenthestringswerebeingtuned,myMaster!
Beginyourmusic,andletmeforgetthepain;letmefeelinbeautywhatyouhadinyourmindthroughthosepitilessdays.
Thewaningnightlingersatmydoors,lethertakeherleaveinsongs.
Pouryourheartintomylifestrings,myMaster,intunesthatdescendfromyourstars.
L
InthelightningflashofamomentIhaveseentheimmensityofyourcreationinmylife—creationthroughmanyadeathfromworldtoworld.
IweepatmyunworthinesswhenIseemylifeinthehandsoftheunmeaninghours,—butwhenIseeitinyourhandsIknowitistooprecioustobesquanderedamongshadows.
LI
Iknowthatatthedimendofsomedaythesunwillbidmeitsfarewell.
Shepherdswillplaytheirpipesbeneaththebanyantrees,andcattlegrazeontheslopebytheriver,whilemydayswillpassintothedark.
Thisismyprayer,thatImayknowbeforeIleavewhytheearthcalledmetoherarms.
Whyhernight’ssilencespoketomeofstars,andherdaylightkissedmythoughtsintoflower.
BeforeIgomayIlingerovermylastrefrain,completingitsmusic,maythelampbelittoseeyourfaceandthewreathwoventocrownyou.
LII
Whatmusicisthatinwhosemeasuretheworldisrocked?
Welaughwhenitbeatsuponthecrestoflife,weshrinkinterrorwhenitreturnsintothedark.
Buttheplayisthesamethatcomesandgoeswiththerhythmoftheendlessmusic.
Youhideyourtreasureinthepalmofyourhand,andwecrythatwearerobbed.
Butopenandshutyourpalmasyouwill,thegainandthelossarethesame.
Atthegameyouplaywithyourownselfyouloseandwinatonce.
LIII
Ihavekissedthisworldwithmyeyesandmylimbs;Ihavewraptitwithinmyheartinnumberlessfolds;Ihavefloodeditsdaysandnightswiththoughtstilltheworldandmylifehavegrownone,—andIlovemylifebecauseIlovethelightoftheskysoenwovenwithme.
Iftoleavethisworldbeasrealastoloveit—thentheremustbeameaninginthemeetingandthepartingoflife.
Ifthatloveweredeceivedindeath,thenthecankerofthisdeceitwouldeatintoallthings,andthestarswouldshrivelandgrowblack.
LIV
TheCloudsaidtome,“Ivanish”;theNightsaid,“Iplungeintothefierydawn.”
ThePainsaid,“Iremainindeepsilenceashisfootprint.”
“Idieintothefulness,”saidmylifetome.
TheEarthsaid,“Mylightskissyourthoughtseverymoment.”
“Thedayspass,”Lovesaid,“butIwaitforyou.”
Deathsaid,“Iplytheboatofyourlifeacrossthesea.”
LV
Tulsidas,thepoet,waswandering,deepinthought,bytheGanges,inthatlonelyspotwheretheyburntheirdead.
Hefoundawomansittingatthefeetofthecorpseofherdeadhusband,gailydressedasforawedding.
Sheroseasshesawhim,bowedtohim,andsaid,“Permitme,Master,withyourblessing,tofollowmyhusbandtoheaven.”
“Whysuchhurry,mydaughter?”askedTulsidas.“IsnotthisearthalsoHiswhomadeheaven?”
“ForheavenIdonotlong,”saidthewoman.“Iwantmyhusband.”
Tulsidassmiledandsaidtoher,“Gobacktoyourhome,mychild.Beforethemonthisoveryouwillfindyourhusband.”
Thewomanwentbackwithgladhope.Tulsidascametohereverydayandgaveherhighthoughtstothink,tillherheartwasfilledtothebrimwithdivinelove.
Whenthemonthwasscarcelyover,herneighbourscametoher,asking,“Woman,haveyoufoundyourhusband?”
Thewidowsmiledandsaid,“Ihave.”
Eagerlytheyasked,“Whereishe?”
“Inmyheartismylord,onewithme,”saidthewoman.
LVI
Youcameforamomenttomysideandtouchedmewiththegreatmysteryofthewomanthatthereisintheheartofcreation.
ShewhoiseverreturningtoGodhisownoutflowingofsweetness;sheistheeverfreshbeautyandyouthinnature;shedancesinthebubblingstreamsandsingsinthemorninglight;shewithheavingwavessucklesthethirstyearth;inhertheEternalOnebreaksintwoinajoythatnolongermaycontainitself,andoverflowsinthepainoflove.
LVII
Whoisshewhodwellsinmyheart,thewomanforlornforever?
IwooedherandIfailedtowinher.Ideckedherwithwreathsandsanginherpraise.
Asmileshoneinherfaceforamoment,thenitfaded.
“Ihavenojoyinthee,”shecried,thewomaninsorrow.
Iboughtherjewelledankletsandfannedherwithafangem-studded;Imadeherabedonabedsteadofgold.
Thereflickeredagleamofgladnessinhereyes,thenitdied.
“Ihavenojoyinthese,”shecried,thewomaninsorrow.
Iseatedheruponacaroftriumphanddroveherfromendtoendoftheearth.
Conqueredheartsboweddownatherfeet,andshoutsofapplauseranginthesky.
Prideshoneinhereyesforamoment,thenitwasdimmedintears.
“Ihavenojoyinconquest,”shecried,thewomaninsorrow.
Iaskedher,“Tellmewhomdoyouseek?”
Sheonlysaid,“Iwaitforhimoftheunknownname.”
Dayspassbyandshecries,“WhenwillmybelovedcomewhomIknownot,andbeknowntomeforever?”
LVIII
Yoursisthelightthatbreaksforthfromthedark,andthegoodthatsproutsfromthecleftheartofstrife.
Yoursisthehousethatopensupontheworld,andthelovethatcallstothebattlefield.
Yoursisthegiftthatstillisagainwheneverythingisaloss,andthelifethatflowsthroughthecavernsofdeath.
Yoursistheheaventhatliesinthecommondust,andyouarethereforme,youarethereforall.
LIX
Whenthewearinessoftheroadisuponme,andthethirstofthesultryday;whentheghostlyhoursoftheduskthrowtheirshadowsacrossmylife,thenIcrynotforyourvoiceonly,myfriend,butforyourtouch.
Thereisananguishinmyheartfortheburdenofitsrichesnotgiventoyou.
Putoutyourhandthroughthenight,letmeholditandfillitandkeepit;letmefeelitstouchalongthelengtheningstretchofmyloneliness.
LX
Theodourcriesinthebud,“Ahme,thedaydeparts,thehappydayofspring,andIamaprisonerinpetals!”
Donotloseheart,timidthing!Yourbondswillburst,thebudwillopenintoflower,andwhenyoudieinthefulnessoflife,eventhenthespringwillliveon.
Theodourpantsandflutterswithinthebud,crying,“Ahme,thehourspassby,yetIdonotknowwhereIgo,orwhatitisIseek!”
Donotloseheart,timidthing!Thespringbreezehasoverheardyourdesire,thedaywillnotendbeforeyouhavefulfilledyourbeing.
Darkisthefuturetoher,andtheodourcriesindespair,“Ahme,throughwhosefaultismylifesounmeaning?
“Whocantellme,whyIamatall?”Donotloseheart,timidthing!Theperfectdawnisnearwhenyouwillmingleyourlifewithalllifeandknowatlastyourpurpose.
LXI
Sheisstillachild,mylord.
Sherunsaboutyourpalaceandplays,andtriestomakeofyouaplaythingaswell.
Sheheedsnotwhenherhairtumblesdownandhercarelessgarmentdragsinthedust.
Shefallsasleepwhenyouspeaktoherandanswersnot—andthefloweryougiveherinthemorningslipstothedustfromherhands.
Whenthestormburstsanddarknessisovertheskysheissleepless;herdollsliescatteredontheearthandsheclingstoyouinterror.
Sheisafraidthatshemayfailinservicetoyou.
Butwithasmileyouwatchherathergame.
Youknowher.
Thechildsittinginthedustisyourdestinedbride;herplaywillbestilledanddeepenedintolove.
LXII
“Whatistherebutthesky,OSun,thatcanholdthineimage?”
“Idreamofthee,buttoservetheeIcanneverhope,”thedewdropweptandsaid,“Iamtoosmalltotaketheeuntome,greatlord,andmylifeisalltears.”
“Iilluminethelimitlesssky,yetIcanyieldmyselfuptoatinydropofdew,”thustheSunsaid;“Ishallbecomebutasparkleoflightandfillyou,andyourlittlelifewillbealaughingorb.”
LXIII
Notformeisthelovethatknowsnorestraint,butlikethefoamingwinethathavingburstitsvesselinamomentwouldruntowaste.
Sendmethelovewhichiscoolandpurelikeyourrainthatblessesthethirstyearthandfillsthehomelyearthenjars.
Sendmethelovethatwouldsoakdownintothecentreofbeing,andfromtherewouldspreadliketheunseensapthroughthebranchingtreeoflife,givingbirthtofruitsandflowers.
Sendmethelovethatkeepstheheartstillwiththefulnessofpeace.
LXIV
Thesunhadsetonthewesternmarginoftheriveramongthetangleoftheforest.
Thehermitboyshadbroughtthecattlehome,andsatroundthefiretolistentothemaster,Guatama,whenastrangeboycame,andgreetedhimwithfruitsandflowers,and,bowinglowathisfeet,spokeinabird-likevoice—“Lord,IhavecometotheetobetakenintothepathofthesupremeTruth.
“MynameisSatyakâma.”
“Blessingsbeonthyhead,”saidthemaster.
“Ofwhatclanartthou,mychild?ItisonlyfittingforaBrahmintoaspiretothehighestwisdom.”
“Master,”answeredtheboy,“IknownotofwhatclanIam.Ishallgoandaskmymother.”
Thussaying,Satyakâmatookleave,andwadingacrosstheshallowstream,camebacktohismother’shut,whichstoodattheendofthesandywasteattheedgeofthesleepingvillage.
Thelampburntdimlyintheroom,andthemotherstoodatthedoorinthedarkwaitingforherson’sreturn.
Sheclaspedhimtoherbosom,kissedhimonhishair,andaskedhimofhiserrandtothemaster.
“Whatisthenameofmyfather,dearmother?”askedtheboy.
“ItisonlyfittingforaBrahmintoaspiretothehighestwisdom,saidLordGuatamatome.”
Thewomanloweredhereyes,andspokeinawhisper.
“InmyyouthIwaspoorandhadmanymasters.ThoudidstcometothymotherJabâlâ‘sarms,mydarling,whohadnohusband.”
Theearlyraysofthesunglistenedonthetree-topsoftheforesthermitage.
Thestudents,withtheirtangledhairstillwetwiththeirmorningbath,satundertheancienttree,beforethemaster.
TherecameSatyakâma.
Hebowedlowatthefeetofthesage,andstoodsilent.
“Tellme,”thegreatteacheraskedhim,“ofwhatclanartthou?”
“Mylord,”heanswered,“Iknowitnot.MymothersaidwhenIaskedher,‘Ihadservedmanymastersinmyyouth,andthouhadstcometothymotherJabâlâ‘sarms,whohadnohusband.’”
Thereroseamurmurliketheangryhumofbeesdisturbedintheirhive;andthestudentsmutteredattheshamelessinsolenceofthatoutcast.
MasterGuatamarosefromhisseat,stretchedouthisarms,tooktheboytohisbosom,andsaid,“BestofallBrahminsartthou,mychild.Thouhastthenoblestheritageoftruth.”
LXV
Maybethereisonehouseinthiscitywherethegateopensforeverthismorningatthetouchofthesunrise,wheretheerrandofthelightisfulfilled.
Theflowershaveopenedinhedgesandgardens,andmaybethereisoneheartthathasfoundinthemthismorningthegiftthathasbeenonitsvoyagefromendlesstime.
LXVI
Listen,myheart,inhisfluteisthemusicofthesmellofwildflowers,oftheglisteningleavesandgleamingwater,ofshadowsresonantwithbees’wings.
Theflutestealshissmilefrommyfriend’slipsandspreadsitovermylife.
LXVII
Youalwaysstandalonebeyondthestreamofmysongs.
ThewavesofmytuneswashyourfeetbutIknownothowtoreachthem.
Thisplayofminewithyouisaplayfromafar.
Itisthepainofseparationthatmeltsintomelodythroughmyflute.
Iwaitforthetimewhenyourboatcrossesovertomyshoreandyoutakemyfluteintoyourownhands.
LXVIII
Suddenlythewindowofmyheartflewopenthismorning,thewindowthatlooksoutonyourheart.
IwonderedtoseethatthenamebywhichyouknowmeiswritteninAprilleavesandflowers,andIsatsilent.
Thecurtainwasblownawayforamomentbetweenmysongsandyours.
Ifoundthatyourmorninglightwasfullofmyownmutesongsunsung;IthoughtthatIwouldlearnthematyourfeet—andIsatsilent.
LXIX
Youwereinthecentreofmyheart,thereforewhenmyheartwanderedsheneverfoundyou;youhidyourselffrommylovesandhopestillthelast,foryouwerealwaysinthem.
Youweretheinmostjoyintheplayofmyyouth,andwhenIwastoobusywiththeplaythejoywaspassedby.
YousangtomeintheecstasiesofmylifeandIforgottosingtoyou.
LXX
Whenyouholdyourlampintheskyitthrowsitslightonmyfaceanditsshadowfallsoveryou.
WhenIholdthelampofloveinmyheartitslightfallsonyouandIamleftstandingbehindintheshadow.
LXXI
Othewaves,thesky-devouringwaves,glisteningwithlight,dancingwithlife,thewavesofeddyingjoy,rushingforever.
Thestarsrockuponthem,thoughtsofeverytintarecastupoutofthedeepandscatteredonthebeachoflife.
Birthanddeathriseandfallwiththeirrhythm,andthesea-gullofmyheartspreadsitswingscryingindelight.
LXXII
Thejoyranfromalltheworldtobuildmybody.
Thelightsoftheskieskissedandkissedhertillshewoke.
Flowersofhurryingsummerssighedinherbreathandvoicesofwindsandwatersanginhermovements.
Thepassionofthetideofcoloursincloudsandinforestsflowedintoherlife,andthemusicofallthingscaressedherlimbsintoshape.
Sheismybride,—shehaslightedherlampinmyhouse.
LXXIII
Thespringwithitsleavesandflowershascomeintomybody.
Thebeeshumtherethemorninglong,andthewindsidlyplaywiththeshadows.
Asweetfountainspringsupfromtheheartofmyheart.
Myeyesarewashedwithdelightlikethedew-bathedmorning,andlifeisquiveringinallmylimbslikethesoundingstringsofthelute.
Areyouwanderingalonebytheshoreofmylife,wherethetideisinflood,Oloverofmyendlessdays?
Aremydreamsflittingroundyoulikethemothswiththeirmany-colouredwings?
Andarethoseyoursongsthatareechoinginthedarkeavesofmybeing?
Whobutyoucanhearthehumofthecrowdedhoursthatsoundsinmyveinsto-day,thegladstepsthatdanceinmybreast,theclamouroftherestlesslifebeatingitswingsinmybody?
LXXIV
Mybondsarecut,mydebtsarepaid,mydoorhasbeenopened,Igoeverywhere.
Theycrouchintheircornerandweavetheirwebofpalehours,theycounttheircoinssittinginthedustandcallmeback.
Butmyswordisforged,myarmourisputon,myhorseiseagertorun.
Ishallwinmykingdom.
LXXV
ItwasonlytheotherdaythatIcametoyourearth,nakedandnameless,withawailingcry.
To-daymyvoiceisglad,whileyou,mylord,standasidetomakeroomthatImayfillmylife.
EvenwhenIbringyoumysongsforanofferingIhavethesecrethopethatmenwillcomeandlovemeforthem.
YoulovetodiscoverthatIlovethisworldwhereyouhavebroughtme.
LXXVI
TimidlyIcoweredintheshadowofsafety,butnow,whenthesurgeofjoycarriesmyheartuponitscrest,myheartclingstothecruelrockofitstrouble.
Isataloneinacornerofmyhousethinkingittoonarrowforanyguest,butnowwhenitsdoorisflungopenbyanunbiddenjoyIfindthereisroomfortheeandforalltheworld.
Iwalkedupontiptoe,carefulofmyperson,perfumed,andadorned—butnowwhenagladwhirlwindhasoverthrownmeinthedustIlaughandrollontheearthatthyfeetlikeachild.
LXXVII
Theworldisyoursatonceandforever.
Andbecauseyouhavenowant,myking,youhavenopleasureinyourwealth.
Itisasthoughitwerenaught.Thereforethroughslowtimeyougivemewhatisyours,andceaselesslywinyourkingdominme.
Dayafterdayyoubuyyoursunrisefrommyheart,andyoufindyourlovecarvenintothe
imageofmylife.
LXXVIII
Tothebirdsyougavesongs,thebirdsgaveyousongsinreturn.
Yougavemeonlyvoice,yetaskedformore,andIsing.
Youmadeyourwindslightandtheyarefleetintheirservice.YouburdenedmyhandsthatImyselfmaylightenthem,andatlast,gainunburdenedfreedomforyourservice.
YoucreatedyourEarthfillingitsshadowswithfragmentsoflight.
Thereyoupaused;youleftmeempty-handedinthedusttocreateyourheaven.
Toallthingselseyougive;frommeyouask.
TheharvestofmyliferipensinthesunandtheshowertillIreapmorethanyousowed,gladdeningyourheart,OMasterofthegoldengranary.
LXXIX
Letmenotpraytobeshelteredfromdangersbuttobefearlessinfacingthem.
Letmenotbegforthestillingofmypainbutforthehearttoconquerit.
Letmenotlookforalliesinlife’sbattlefieldbuttomyownstrength.
Letmenotcraveinanxiousfeartobesavedbuthopeforthepatiencetowinmyfreedom.
GrantmethatImaynotbeacoward,feelingyourmercyinmysuccessalone;butletmefindthegraspofyourhandinmyfailure.
LXXX
Youdidnotknowyourselfwhenyoudweltalone,andtherewasnocryingofanerrandwhenthewindranfromthehithertothefarthershore.
Icameandyouwoke,andtheskiesblossomedwithlights.
Youmademeopeninmanyflowers;rockedmeinthecradlesofmanyforms;hidmeindeathandfoundmeagaininlife.
Icameandyourheartheaved;paincametoyouandjoy.
Youtouchedmeandtingledintolove.
Butinmyeyesthereisafilmofshameandinmybreastaflickeroffear;myfaceisveiled
andIweepwhenIcannotseeyou.
YetIknowtheendlessthirstinyourheartforsightofme,thethirstthatcriesatmydoorintherepeatedknockingsofsunrise.
LXXXI
You,inyourtimelesswatch,listentomyapproachingstepswhileyourgladnessgathersinthemorningtwilightandbreaksintheburstoflight.
ThenearerIdrawtoyouthedeepergrowsthefervourinthedanceofthesea.
Yourworldisabranchingsprayoflightfillingyourhands,butyourheavenisinmysecretheart;itslowlyopensitsbudsinshylove.
LXXXII
Iwillutteryourname,sittingaloneamongtheshadowsofmysilentthoughts.
Iwillutteritwithoutwords,Iwillutteritwithoutpurpose.
ForIamlikeachildthatcallsitsmotheranhundredtimes,gladthatitcansay“Mother.”
LXXXIII
I
Ifeelthatallthestarsshineinme.Theworldbreaksintomylifelikeaflood.
Theflowersblossominmybody.Alltheyouthfulnessoflandandwatersmokeslikeanincenseinmyheart;andthebreathofallthingsplaysonmythoughtsasonaflute.
II
WhentheworldsleepsIcometoyourdoor.
Thestarsaresilent,andIamafraidtosing.
Iwaitandwatch,tillyourshadowpassesbythebalconyofnightandIreturnwithafullheart.
TheninthemorningIsingbytheroadside;
Theflowersinthehedgegivemeanswerandthemorningairlistens,
Thetravellerssuddenlystopandlookinmyface,thinkingIhavecalledthembytheirnames.
III
Keepmeatyourdooreverattendingtoyourwishes,andletmegoaboutinyourKingdomacceptingyourcall.
Letmenotsinkanddisappearinthedepthoflanguor.
Letnotmylifebewornouttotattersbypenuryofwaste.
Letnotthosedoubtsencompassme,—thedustofdistractions.
Letmenotpursuemanypathstogathermanythings.
Letmenotbendmyhearttotheyokeofthemany.
Letmeholdmyheadhighinthecourageandprideofbeingyourservant.
LXXXIV
THEOARSMEN
Doyouhearthetumultofdeathafar,Thecallmidstthefire-floodsandpoisonousclouds—TheCaptain’scalltothesteersmantoturntheshiptoanunnamedshore,Forthattimeisover—thestagnanttimeintheport—Wherethesameoldmerchandiseisboughtandsoldinanendlessround,Wheredeadthingsdriftintheexhaustionandemptinessoftruth.
Theywakeupinsuddenfearandask,“Comrades,whathourhasstruck?Whenshallthedawnbegin?”Thecloudshaveblottedawaythestars—Whoistherethencanseethebeckoningfingeroftheday?Theyrunoutwithoarsinhand,thebedsareemptied,themotherprays,thewifewatchesbythedoor;Thereisawailofpartingthatrisestothesky,AndthereistheCaptain’svoiceinthedark:“Come,sailors,forthetimeintheharbourisover!”
Alltheblackevilsintheworldhaveoverflowedtheirbanks,Yet,oarsmen,takeyourplaceswiththeblessingofsorrowinyoursouls!Whomdoyoublame,brothers?Bowyourheadsdown!
Thesinhasbeenyoursandours.TheheatgrowingintheheartofGodforages—Thecowardiceoftheweak,thearroganceofthestrong,thegreedoffatprosperity,therancourofthewronged,prideofrace,andinsulttoman—HasburstGod’speace,raginginstorm.
Likearipepod,letthetempestbreakitsheartintopieces,scatteringthunders.Stopyourblusterofdispraiseandofself-praise,Andwiththecalmofsilentprayeronyourforeheadssailtothatunnamedshore.
Wehaveknownsinsandevilseverydayanddeathwehaveknown;Theypassoverourworldlikecloudsmockinguswiththeirtransientlightninglaughter.Suddenlytheyhavestopped,becomeaprodigy,Andmenmuststandbeforethemsaying:“Wedonotfearyou,OMonster!forwehavelivedeverydaybyconqueringyou,“AndwediewiththefaiththatPeaceistrue,andGoodistrue,andtrueistheeternalOne!”
IftheDeathlessdwellnotintheheartofdeath,Ifgladwisdombloomnotburstingthesheathofsorrow,Ifsindonotdieofitsownrevealment,Ifpridebreaknotunderitsloadofdecorations,Thenwhencecomesthehopethatdrivesthesemenfromtheirhomeslikestarsrushingtotheirdeathinthemorninglight?Shallthevalueofthemartyrs’bloodandmothers’tearsbeutterlylostinthedustoftheearth,notbuyingHeavenwiththeirprice?AndwhenManburstshismortalbounds,isnottheBoundlessrevealedthatmoment?
LXXXV
THESONGOFTHEDEFEATED
MyMasterhasbidmewhileIstandattheroadside,tosingthesongofDefeat,forthatisthebridewhomHewoosinsecret.
Shehasputonthedarkveil,hidingherfacefromthecrowd,butthejewelglowsonherbreastinthedark.
Sheisforsakenoftheday,andGod’snightiswaitingforherwithitslampslightedandflowerswetwithdew.
Sheissilentwithhereyesdowncast;shehasleftherhomebehindher,fromherhomehascomethatwailinginthewind.
Butthestarsaresingingthelove-songoftheeternaltoafacesweetwithshameandsuffering.
Thedoorhasbeenopenedinthelonelychamber,thecallhassounded,andtheheartofthedarknessthrobswithawebecauseofthecomingtryst.
LXXXVI
THANKSGIVING
Thosewhowalkonthepathofpridecrushingthelowlylifeundertheirtread,coveringthetendergreenoftheearthwiththeirfootprintsinblood;
Letthemrejoice,andthankthee,Lord,forthedayistheirs.
ButIamthankfulthatmylotlieswiththehumblewhosufferandbeartheburdenofpower,andhidetheirfacesandstifletheirsobsinthedark.
Foreverythroboftheirpainhaspulsedinthesecretdepthofthynight,andeveryinsulthasbeengatheredintothygreatsilence.Andthemorrowistheirs.
OSun,riseuponthebleedingheartsblossominginflowersofthemorning,andthetorchlightrevelryofprideshrunkentoashes.
THEEND