Download - HLAA Presents Perseverance Success and You!
PERSEVERANCE, SUCCESS & YOU
Some people are more resilient than others and you can be too!
INTRODUCTION TO PERSEVERANCE
Perseverance is… achieving positive growth by overcoming adversity.
www.brianpatrickjensen.com
Perseverance Model
Bounce Back
Persist and Endure
Achieve Success
Be Better For It
INTRODUCTION TO PERSEVERANCE
www.brianpatrickjensen.com
unexpected unwanted unpleasant unsettling unlucky
unhappy unprepared uncharted unrelenting unimagined
INTRODUCTION TO PERSEVERANCE
INTRODUCTION TO PERSEVERANCE
Perseverance…is a process of choices and actions, not a personality trait.
INTRODUCTION TO PERSEVERANCE
APPLICATIONWrite out a brief description of the problem, crisis or challenge you now wish to overcome“I am profoundly HH in a hearing society and I feelisolated and alone. I am caught between twoworlds– hearing people and individuals who aredeaf or profoundly HH. I struggle to communicatewith both. I miss daughters’ laughter & It’s hard.”
5 THINGS RESILIENT PEOPLE DO
1. Believe growth is a choice2. Stare down hard reality3. Find a higher meaning4. Use own pain to heal others 5. Visualize the extraordinary
1.) BELIEVE GROWTH IS A CHOICE
No Control (External)
Influence
(External)
You
(Internal)
We do NOT control
the “External” world
All other people
Time and events
Economic pressures
Medical diagnoses
Weather and seasons
Harm and tragedy
Hitting the lottery
1.) BELIEVE GROWTH IS A CHOICE
No Control (External)
Influence
(External)
You
(Internal)
We DO control the
“Internal” self
Reactions to Externals
Decisions, beliefs & values
Plans (not outcomes!)
Self-awareness
Desire, passion & energy
Skills and learning
Behaviors and actions
1.) BELIEVE GROWTH IS A CHOICE
No Control (External)
Influence
(External)
You
(Internal)
We can “Influence”
the External world
It is ineffective to focus on
things you do not control
Focus on the External
DECREASES Influence
Focus on the Internal
INCREASES Influence
Personal Growth
Awareness
Desire Skill
Action
Copyright 2011 All Rights Reserved
1.) BELIEVE GROWTH IS A CHOICE
1.) BELIEVE GROWTH IS A CHOICE
APPLICATION
Write two lists concerning your current challenge:
I do NOT Control• That my hearing is kaput• Social bias to Deaf / HH• People who don’t get it• Technology limits• Audience trance
I DO Control• How I communicate• How I help others • Asking for help• Learning HH gadgets• My stage presence
2.) STARE DOWN HARD REALITY
THE OPTIMISM TRAP
Resilient people keep things realWe are hard-wired unrealistic*Optimism: Denial in disguise
2.) STARE DOWN HARD REALITY
*People hugely underestimate chances of getting divorced, losing a job and being diagnosed ill while overestimating personal achievement, family fortune and life span.
-Time Magazine: The Science of Optimism
INVENTORY COLD HARD FACTS
I lost all hearing; it’s permanent
Career took a major hit
Miss my children’s voices
Get exponentially less information
I feel isolated; talk to less people
Interpreting visual cues is exhausting
Lip reading seems impossible
Yearn for sounds of music, nature, etc.
Depleting all my money
2.) STARE DOWN HARD REALITY
GRIEVE WITH PASSION
Holding back is unhealthy Sharing pain helps you & others Process toward healing
2.) STARE DOWN HARD REALITY
Sadness, anger and depression are sane reactions to great loss. Grieving is a healthy process with stages that should be experienced, not denied.
- Coping with Grief and Loss: HelpGuide.org
ASK FOR SPECIFIC HELP
Admit you need help (Acceptance)
Do not assume they know Show exactly what to do Never beg, apologize or demand Reinforce positive efforts
2.) STARE DOWN HARD REALITY
APPLICATIONInventory all the cold hard facts of your situation. Select 1 item and describe specifically how another person can help you with it.
“I can ask my daughters to text or email me aquick summary of their day, every day. Then Ican keep a running journal of communicationsbetween my kids and their Dad!”
2.) STARE DOWN HARD REALITY
3.) FIND A HIGHER MEANING
“Resilient people know that pain instructs and insist to find lessons through their plight. They are convicted toward a higher purpose in suffering. They simply believe that hurt means more.”
– Brian Patrick Jensen
3.) FIND A HIGHER MEANING
Found CSD via HLAA Nature is more vivid Insight into human behavior Better comprehension via captions Keener of others’ true feelings New friends who understand Inspired by others’ feedback Better at sharing my heart Closer to my children Higher vocation and aspirations Advocate for Deaf and HH w/ CSD
APPLICATIONWrite your own list of lessons learned or desirable outcomes that actually occurred as a result of your difficulty (e.g. how I found CSD!)
Caution: List only firm convictions, facts or actual events. This is not a wish list or ambiguous hope that something good will come. It must be real.
3.) FIND A HIGHER MEANING
4.) USE PAIN TO HEAL OTHERS
You are uniquely qualified
Pain instructs far more effectively than positives
Pain creates action; satisfaction breeds sloth
What are your most powerful “pain-connects?”
Rally together with those who “get it” to do something big!
“Mr. Jensen is effectively deaf.” Doylestown Hospital-ENT audiology report on 7/9/2010
4.) USE PAIN TO HEAL OTHERS
Memorized Sarah’s speech
Wrote daughters a poem
Started new blog
Contacted HLAA / ALDA
Implored “Real About Diversity” to HR groups
Joined CSD to help others facing similar challenges
Created this presentation!
APPLICATIONWrite a list of attributes that make you uniquely qualified to assist others who share your pain; then write second list of actions you can take to reach out to them.
Then do it!
4.) USE PAIN TO HEAL OTHERS
5.) VISUALIZE THE EXTRAORDINARY
See higher purpose to current struggles via a concrete vision: Visualization techniques (as in athletes)
Imagine specifically “Dreams Awake” Set concrete goals for future
5.) VISUALIZE THE EXTRAORDINARY
“The people cheer wildly. They are moved by my preaching; they are inspired. Cameras are popping, lights are whirling and the ovation is thunderous. The scene overwhelms me with pride and gratitude. I feel a warmth and love and connection with the crowd. It’s magical!”
– Dreams Awake blog post by Brian Patrick Jensen
APPLICATIONImagine a future of happiness and accomplishment beyond* your current struggles. Be very specific and write it down. Dream big!*Note: “Beyond” does not mean “without” if your current problem is permanent. I didn’t visualize to be cured of my deafness; rather to use my hearing loss to inspire others that they can overcome their struggles too.
5.) VISUALIZE THE EXTRAORDINARY
5 THINGS RESILIENT PEOPLE DO
1. Believe growth is a choice2. Stare down hard reality3. Find a higher meaning4. Use pain to heal others5. Visualize the extraordinary
BE INSPIRED EVERY DAY!
Dance like no one is watching. Sing like no one is listening. Love like you’ve never been hurt and live like it’s heaven on Earth.
–Mark Twain