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Partnering with Parents: The Best Investment a Parish Can MakeTom Quinlan ([email protected])
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Opening Prayer: The Road to Emmaus (Luke 24:13-35)
Come, Holy Spirit and renew the face of the earth.
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Emmaus Offers Formative Model
Emmaus Model
Encounter
Understanding
Relationship
CONVERSION
Traditional Model
Understanding
Religious Practice
Faithful Living
DISCIPLESHIP
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Parents TodayThe more impactful relationshipHow would you describe parents
today? Post-modernism and Parents
◦Julie – on the fence, wants to be revived
◦Kara – faith-filled and mostly gone◦Kyle – just wants sacraments◦Deirdre – can we clone her?
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My Primary Pastoral/Catechetical PresumptionsThe full spiritual/religious well-being of
our parish families must be our focusThe Church has largely been successful
sacramentalizing; the Church has largely been ineffectual evangelizing
Decline in practice well-evidenced; decline now in even seeking sacraments
Evangelizing Catechesis is essential; catechetical leadership is largely and increasingly about evangelization
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Your Wisdom for Partnering with Parents (submit now)What is your most effective
practice?
Name an effective practice from a parish in your diocese.
What is something you would love to begin at your parish?
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Twenty Suggestions (PLUS ONE) for Partnering with Parents
Utilize Digital Resourcing to Form Parents in Faith ◦go to them, where they live…on their
computer, in their smart phone
Resource Parents in Helpful Ways Beyond Faith◦meet their real and felt needs…parenting,
marriage, finances, stress-management, etc.
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Invite Families to Experience the Parish◦ devotions, liturgies (ie. blessing of pets,
Stations of the Cross), parish happenings (formation, service, social, etc.)
Use Electronic Communication and Social Media◦get the word out…this can assist with the prior
two points and the latter (Twitter and Facebook can work!)
Constantly Reinforce the Proper Context for Faith Formation◦Called to a life of prayer (including Mass) and
service; catechesis provides a foundation (only)
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Listen To Them: The Pastoral Role of Catechetical Leader◦Become attentive to what they mean; be
intuitive to their needs and care about them; strive to grow in cultural sensitivity
Challenge Them Out of Apostolic Courage (Pope Francis’ term)◦Have the evangelizing conversation
(lovingly)
Outreach I: Seek the Marginal and Unaffiliated◦Intentional spring/summer outreach
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Outreach II: Baptism and Beyond◦Create and sustain relationship to parish;
encourage faith practice in home and parish while the cement is still wet! (Habit formation: Cue, Rhythm, and Impact)
Create Opportunities for Parents to Participate (and Be Formed) In-Session◦With their children and in a parent faith
formation setting
Encourage Parents to Be Active in Their Child’s Learning at Home◦Texts need to be sent home and consumed
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Empower Parents to Pray with Their Children and Share Faith◦Scripture, rituals and blessing
Coach Them Up◦Train them formally to confidently
embrace their role
Family Faith Totes◦One bag per grade that rotates among
families with special resources (specific to that grade) for parents and family
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Say Yes Whenever Possible…◦No when necessary and don’t be afraid to
hold accountable…special circumstances, late registrations, conflicting activities, tuition and participation issues
Uphold the Values, Drop the Judgment◦Condemnatory attitudes and actions are
both inappropriate and ineffectual; ie.) Mass attendance
Affirm Positives and Celebrate Successes◦Reinforce good outcomes with personal
touches
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Be A Talent Scout◦Recognize giftedness in parents and call
forth their gifts (Marie at St. Hubert)
Create A Culture of Relationship-Building◦An environment where not only leader-
parent relationships form but also catechist-parent, parent-parent, etc.
Plan and Goal-Set for Parent Partnering◦With parish leadership and with parents
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Your Wisdom for Partnering with ParentsWhat is your most effective
practice?
Name an effective practice from a parish in your diocese.
What is something you would love to begin at your parish?
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Plan With the End in MindWhat is the goal of parish faith formation ministry for children? Your goal?
◦A simple, profound and essential question◦Enormous implications◦Work backwards from your answer
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Plus OneThe Preeminent Evangelizing Value:
Parent and Family Faith Formation Must Be At The Service of Fostering
Conversion
“Get the parents through the children” is fine and true, but to what end?
Parents can’t give what they don’t have; they are primarily candidates for evangelization today
Each of the twenty prior points must be read through this lens of evangelization/fostering conversion
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Modalities for Parent and Family Faith Formation Whole community/parish
formation eventsFamily formation eventsParent formation sessionsParent coaching sessions with
childrenRetreats, evenings/mornings of
reflection
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Modalities for Parent and Family Faith Formation Regular parish eventsRegional or diocesan eventsFamilies at homeFamilies sent out in serviceFormation content delivered
home (digital or paper)Small faith communities
(gathered or virtual)
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Occasions for Parent and Family Faith Formation
Seasons and FeastsOrdinary Formation SessionsSacrament Preparation for
ParentsSacrament Preparation for
FamiliesSingular (Special) Occasions
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Parent Sacramental Prep GatheringsRequire attendance
◦Video tape and hold accountableProvide a warm, hospitable experience
◦Not a meeting, an evening of reflection, or such
Make connections between life and Catholic faith◦i.e.) Reconciliation/forgiveness; Eucharist/meal◦Address their adult questions of meaning ◦The evocative power of story
Stress the importance of their bringing the faith home to their family◦Provide specific, simple, resourced practices
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For ReflectionDo people believe their way into
belonging…or belong their way into believing?
What percentage of the last parent meeting could be considered evangelizing or designed to foster conversion?
Name something in your ministry/in the parish that seems effective in fostering conversion. Why does it seem effective?
Do I invite the Holy Spirit into my ministry?
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For ReflectionHow do I perceive parents in the
program? How do parents perceive me?Do I encourage catechists to relate to
parents?Do I utilize the gifts of strong role model
parents to help to mentor other parents?How well do I resource parents? How?Am I able to keep my well full…
spiritually, physically, emotional…a.) abundantly filled? b.) adequately filled? c.) are you kidding?
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Websiteswww.sadlierreligion.com/webelieve/gath
er.cfm
http://www.sadlierreligion.com/family.cfm
http://www.dioceseofjoliet.org/reo/◦Click on “Evangelizing Catechist Resources”
tab and please feel free to share Be an Evangelizing Catechist/Teacher-Catechist with catechists and Catholic school teachers. My gift to you!
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Questions/Comments
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Come Holy Spirit!Fill the hearts of your
faithful,And enkindle in them the
fire of your love.Send forth your Spirit and
they shall be created;And you shall renew the
face of the earth.