flrilF&1,J'i

, l

'fii

'*You rnay be the walrus but if ss, L'm the h p T*11

Yttu kntrrv rrltrrl llrirl

flr*ans? li nrcans, I got jane F*ntl* on $y *iile, blt$h'* O* I.ricrrr''r,r

-$houtetl bt' a grouchp S$s*it $r*n{ wsrkerBy

&.r:, il4a*inln

l.::l'1:llj*g:.*{.n*"*.h.*f of relto pudding overIurned on ,u_},trtxf . As ir ftrppe**" a* 3:*# *icx**k in-rne rm*inin!" e; ; ;id;;i"')#bihlous misgdr#*Aw*; .l fh*r:d,myc*tf in ntnc *-f il Lr*rwl *f vnniln trll,,'ll]1ts missdvrna*e. I fru*r:d,mys*tfin ltnfi -r;b";i;f

;ffitJ;lli:llTLj

*,T !*o;** s+me r:tifticutrl in locnring-;;;;r;;""

urqreflrent{., tn rny anguish I began r*arranging the cupbcercts in nn

;llll11il:jy:y::fflqf::: rr ssemi r i* *ukins quir, . ,,,,,r.,r iltrt'causc rny rmrn mare whotreeps on rhe ,op nLr Ju"#d;; ;nn';;,i',,,,nnle

)'il*rv. I **n't fully *xploin the rignifiemue of wh*t hxppenxd next butaJter b*th *f *s hsd exp*nd*tl *ilr rs*srve$ *i'Sill *r:sby rulat*dhum*uro ffiy rs*mffi&ls {s$k n*t* *f ruy pr+tliealxent wi$ regard t* thepudding mix *nd sfYer*d t* hr.lp. It $s{rm$ that $lliot, mat *nly knewrvher* tle #rix wa$ fuut w*s also a\ryarc of where the ele*tri* mix*r" milk*s${t #fhe nsedr$ary r#Sgsnt$ rs*re kept [d* then Xrr<lcecd*d to preFsre

oo&rhr)il your eladdy drinks, whar kind of lhings does hs $ay tc yoil?" M),r6sx$ rn&f€ rvlr*'d h*en slerping and lrho g*rwrally pa),s llo mind trl mydnirrk*n buiY'**ncry" r**prrided with the v*iee *f s *hurli*h S y*ar r:td.'.1{e rn**t n:r&stly jnst eri*x" and tnlkr nlmut how if he'd only rh*lltd{frJt }h* }5 ae,nts ltlr exira strength drre,x, h*'d still have his life""

'n,4. fuit hs] h*l Hxrrx $tr*ngtft llmrex, A hs h* h*

""fhcrt lre sl*ms *hsilting and tells me his tin*t choiee fnr my naffie !v&{

| * tro hn h*l I b*t it n-ttx' A hr: hr: h*l

Jello pudding mix Fom scraleh while I sttxrd unsteaclily hy. "ffi

I *at in the k{tch*n fur r mnm*nr s$*nrke i**mnr pudding hsd hesdprepued, rny lliend emd I sp*l*x nightly rvith *n*r anffh*r h*t?rr hqsaid, yawning * lVell nran" tr'm geiingIo slwp, *nj*y your pudding"

t sar f$r s morffent after he"<l leli and J l*:olied at the puddine. ,";;!mix*d up and crazy as life can ht if propte g*t tngrrh*, andiry aMltnhe *rils* cl* lrf ir* disp*rare parc; snmething Uiiiei*u$

-* fo-

-

3;c*1eO " I rhen took the pudding into nry mom and snon fbll oslecp

fh*nking rhc universe f'r:r tire peoplc in my lifb.

{ wsks up thx **xt mrming eover${, in jelln **r;m;mffiTff:, -*:::f. 1nryj l'd m.aire H*,t*ssil;d-*ro ;-w-iiii i_*i1 ym'rl rhncorx*. rnq r,,*a* ms ffi t_ffi#'fi#_ ffiiil;r*ally h*lp you thrrxgh rfufl$s $ri*ky ff*r*fr*u."- .l:- ,,

5.- If you hnve any friends l*ole ing for, *rnffi

It stffek m* th;rt whst w** *ccurring $$$ &n set ilf'trus Si*ndnhip" A&iearl is fi p*rssn rshil fer what*vsr ress#ft csni*s itrt* yaur lif* ar *gir*n p*ixt and with*ut expor:txlinn pr*vid*.n 5,,*rr wlt*l $sfi!$thifig y$urvcltrld n{}t hevE orhsrv$irs hnd" Whllthrr it's *sngthi.ns $$ kivi*l $.s sbowl of pudding or as profounel ns the scnss of security thar cour*s wirlrhfiswilrg tlr$t ysu #r8 n$t *l *e irr n wrrrld wlri*h q*x bc$ h$rsh *ndunfcrrgiving.

WD e**

H* t e is -\ L* "Jo,-k-

Fot it , n yg\rr /u-\CqA";hs*3 r--ri l i

t$."rP il.rr -\our h,rd a^.d" t1'\t-.^L"J r''ifa' v"i r tr aci; yr4 ts-{l.erx l-"/qlr ?drc ,,ts A\* $* v<st..lrYf,t,?nlo ^'" d.\o if* I$\rrc UlciLsod ,

-l ha * \lorJ {.o"..^ .^.. , Sioxa{Pt*..^" * i }-P lt r;r-, rJo^, Fhe*r( a {-Arrour!UUagl'.lo -,, o{ ,*, d 1...tS..t pe 1*e'..*ly , ** f-:o tc)

piggleely, sql the ecns&rneclo can*tnting sdults hers at s*und

#fO g**ig** tCI fiy $ur dan:nedest ts dsfine a coupl*" f;nj*y.

ffiG tsb*ls ar* thrcwn around higgledy'

flaldwin-

S*uchohxg * i n*t *n-ly us*le*s, but dstrimentcl jrlst lihe n lrn{* dCIushs. Nnt only an &sxhsle, but sffinsivt*, a'trnaying' nndt* tep it *ff, thi*tt thcynre the life *r the psrty. C*!11t1$

"exar*ple* indude ev*13 Saldwin br*ther. cspecially $tnphen

E.

La forge

dude, I have nn hent.I deirr f t know, I pald t .hm rxnt, I maeje i*guir ies.Just cold y ' ) tnnw-So. 1 've takelr to taking a let of belhs. Remlj .yreal ly hgd wirh rny cetL rest i r :q on the f ,o i lat . *apand thld tiny $*ny spa:r:tx rndtp tlrar dcesni t getfi#sd^"#i*cepti*n i.$ wy b#*hs**&r f, ia*r's anot.heEr*h*Ie th ing, becauss someti .sqes I h* ld !* abcve myhe*d when $.t 'e ss:$*fhlng l r**11y r*an? t* he*r*but I feel }ike p**ple u*uld f,r*r** *rl th**, Xtr$Ereat thouqh, t rp*nd a g**S l*nry tlms {n Ahrsre.Not to *ey that I n*$er dr*F sn*f,fr s b**k *s fr+*have fa3"len victixr, fuu* reelly. I,ff i *n t!:s bx"?"3ro'hen i t '$ importan*, rea31y. 3t 's 3u*C. so coid;*ns s ide *f my a; ] f ix f$enf. {e a31 sl id ing q}.assqt**r*. T ju*t *p*ncl s*r ;. ieeil,{? tim* *hsre e.h:ab myf. ! .**s i* **y*re* in h**kg snd *;{ : thes, r"rhich nql*x"la **T? s*y ix n*f s mj"rr*red. n*** f*r th*irl i rn*x, buf i f rnnke* ne em.barra.ssed t* *** *h€3,&n{ i l *s{ i up**air* , S* 1t 's th i -s *y* lnr 3 mesn StuF, Ic*vs nu* its **ld. c*rft* ha*k. picxe.d *.helt Aes**i,d gxd take * batlr, ff isss it up *nd. rt ln sl*hta' { :*sre

"l l i ; * *h * i t ld*g j r r ; -kr : .hrv^mq rha!- I AA* l*r : i t i .n4

sb*u1.,Y&, :?{30 *ti} l 3*:vinq th* 3**k5r *karms.

Sr; I 'v* h**e eat l*q a l* t * f *hat f i ** ty } ie*t*rrSrmpl: 's $* lx*s in th* hath*ub, 3 "Liv* al*nel uhn***r l 3 s#Xr. n iJt i *s qrex* l l t 's **mf ' r :X*!nq *r ic$kinda l lke f iq i r t i ,ng r* i rh y*ur body. Jr :st ro l th theba{h bqirrg s+ rel*xlng **d t}: l*ft e}n* *hiarras".,Xr*nf**1 qumaf," Sc) X [ry t i ] se* l*{hieh vsi}1" win" lq.sthe tr isk th*r-rqf i r ; you g*g:a edt to av*:c l t .he i :athsnel l , u i : ich was the r+h*le po.:nt of ury repj .y.

Y*u kn*w the bubi:le tlars, ure.)"] J *ome home and

{1

s,,?.

' crr:nnb"Le like 3 l*lr*nqf*r ja*rn$xl* de*ln i"f i t?r* t i lh.

fisLls* ehq h'ilbbles k**p y*ur upp6r b*dy reai.lyrd*s1nr, i t * lnteErel , r ,n te] l ing ysu. I can, ldirr*r*e the imp*rean*e of ths luslt sfuff frorn t.hebath"{nE *,xSlerterrce. Ok, bu* when I sst up a realb$.q h*wl of l**:lcy *harm,$, I haue t* k*ep lt reallys:&*x* 'h* $y fs*e arrd lak* qr:iclr blte aftsr bite,**n*unrlng !L ldj"thclut 1etl lng mli surroundj.ngs playI t t t* *he meaL ; l 's hard, h**&uss f refuse to letth* smel l of the bubbles fuck wi th r*hel I "n

iBsginS.iffihat u**ld be weird.

tr$:e $iqglh{?S

i

$aBHclrus ffi,axfles

fis $sfir€ts efthe ssethe sea is aheady heppily mnni€d and is sick of youusing it nf a wsy out of sommitmpnt.ssrrsi it's"moreiike seilors to nsr have a list of rules,there sre no rules, but since thero's atready a tist ofrules, thsre &re ruls$, but its so unsailor to say that, soyoulre really put in s spst when someone gsk yCIuabcut the nrles. So if someone does ssk ysu, ju$t $tabthem wiill your sypbilis knife.resi$ poopdeck jotes, but e'mml, svqryons gets e &$l,my uncle w&s i$ the ncvy" he molested ffif. at $s.f,, I het*sailors...and wsterbsds shnped iik* he*rtr,t^be ocean works on the honour systemif you fart and somesne yells damknob* you have to goand touch a doorknob, on landhaving "salt water in your veins" is just another way tosay you have syphiliswhen yCIu get beth prCIdusts fcr Chriskns$, msk€ s$reyou shars

10. whcn the pities m6 6n fire" with thc brura,ing fl*rh sfmsh* just re fisnrher ft*t de*th is nst ths end-

I l. at lesst tfuere *rt as hippies et $ea

Itiram Q here loyel rr*ders. t,

s-ffiffitr*11ffiX$L:Y:*:YffL1*#:1yTr m{},Tt}* "*he h***r p*n I*f**tr,y ry1*ryi*w} grygrn** *o* xfw{t by ,,irplf ,--,-f rte ediri*s *,f;;*{tfis*e*tnt!mind-$s*,ffr$r;rffid, *rc*ieirc s$e$S rhE dwen in e chew Estreven #nvertible, likc1g}ry qld*r* @ga +* h-;;;;-s: o?;""" no summer sen b€*wx,n d s h*p $o the eiry of,stolen drems, lcs AnR-a_

,$ember, J snuek away $or* the ot' rir* f-rrl i|e*s. $E-

rv+*mie m*gf3q-ts ls* my ol'pal Joe FesEi. The ope* road af ,iint in th* n*f,innotr srrsryl ! fi*^rr". *;.1"-: -. - .'\l11*Tn- l51o:tne.ccinr in *he*ri*u*?u**, i ni_ilv #*,,fi-;ffi;* ,

f;l1lff:il:ff ,sm:y" Tjfy^tu. ;q 1T-; ;Wft": "'ii'{edircr's nsre : rhe fullcr+ierg L n eanitc UeH;;;

" !sffi!8*:llclr&mef!*

I** r*x*ft T$iffiffinlf *t*Gi ffi tEffi i1[bt*f'**il:ft\*m!(1$ 1i *v*

{fik*i*rr'* *r}t*: ;}**'s trlieksnnrc fbr nre is danny gl*v*r, la* j*rs ih$* tllixg w*har.c)

1liryy A; Jqre pescd, you otxunu{khirehl J,W!:#fl$R\.*h\"'Jtx lx*sci; lts funnl'thnt 1*u eeiiled *ne" ${ril$e }n** $r*sr trnr umu *v *i*r_li$],hers rq'*;'rr jusr thi* nrinum tarki*g alr*ur y*te. se&$xy, r'd fike v*uin n**r &llry new li,i*nd- i}re educ*isrl $f tinre. W

.0.1:.T*:::*: eif l"iffiq; I'nr nsr gt*ei ro r$eer ysu Dnmny, nlrd at$$._ r *ish $

th6* y$u would l*.irvc. *nsl rrs.rrsrnissien.| !tua;; *r fil ffi !ll*;rri; ffiffi ffiL li***ugr*x, p*p*r* rs {e{r* vi*t*xrr_iusticilf,T $l:r."rl l"ley hey. eany. Danny, tre's s liftle n:ugh arannl the *dge*, bur he

H,}lilil,t:lli,ihi, Iffis ff.;*:ilJi:n;:' rew\,Th* Hri**et**x *f T*n*:1.*"q" ttg{*s nfikj*e l*iit*lo *.\"i$ffi '

" n,

J*e Fsci: licl' I"re1'. tlcyx. r*rJi**rve lrr;s *npteasa****t* uurrio,r ul*,,r "uSqt $*tfie r,iinner. I knnrr. a place. Fn&nk's Bor*chr* rr Eea! clamy joiint, jdr

rlghl fury**:g***,{Hclit.r's ncre: Ar tlris p:int rte rcx}k n mb tn Frwrk"s !}orschr. errd a}rh$uel,tfte educeti*n *f tirn*. gor rhctgun" I sar in rhe back with Jr:* and r*rnlllcarried fhe cenver*ation.)jrm F*.9*l: snel* &g*r lrys n'r*, s! !nsx, rt ln-gs ths h**r of tin,*s, it was thc ..$iW$lffi'ffi:-#;x;il[, \; q'iThe lxucariun arf time: ]"tAltAt{AHAHA*IAAHA!iA. I rrd u liule ri*rr

,#ffiff:ffi-iffi*p,.*:r*sers ir. ffitf{irem Q: #rmr.

{i}dlt*r* *e$*l I g*e Ir t**i. *tu,tr1fd l}e!$**ti$* nf?}*n. we rve?r$ h rei the

* l

,q[,!i l

| ,,',i j

HNS

restsursnt and il *as beautiful. everything *as trffniqsted crrd Elcan)Joc Fcs*i: $a whitE we 'r* waiting for course l, why don-t you get us * little

ffiLrducationof time? JThe Hducatisfi of Time: I ti4ll do just that Jce.Flirarn Q: Oh Boyr I enn't waie "{Editor's nstc: &t *is point that jerk left fur the weshmoni and e$me backwith a rnirrqr with two white lines of Bowder on it end a csn ofpop)&lrrfiItlsn oftims; I brought you pepsi Daff]y,Joe Fesci: HAI{AHo" genlus. hc gcts me coke- then hc seyr, I brought youpepsi!l Ahhh hah hah. You kill r*e. You kitlt me" Did you hear tftat Danny?Fliram Q: I dfifi't thlnk thnt its very funnyEducation of time; ANso Joe Fesei, just now {t$ we wcfe talking, I stole hisyt'lut u$ trc-g1"t bnnny filCIvcr at all. Look" See" Hlsname isFliram....Q..,. [-lgly.l"liram Q: ltc nst Trus Joel 1'**k st rll*, I n*s *n lg&trl !?eeprlrl *f, r-ith yotroysnnvr pt ro reruemborl IJw Ps*si' I. j*st d*rrltL'n*ur r.rhsr tr) bslisvs {{Sdftor"s not* at thir psint The Education of time and I smrt to strangle eachotlrer end Joe Pesci pulls out s gun)Jc* Pesci: Which one of you is thc REAL d*nny glover?Hiram Q arut The Educarion rf time simuI$"...NCI I AM!U*rarn Q" Hl',*S, TIUS. ;t*H II'SSCII(Editsr"s nste: out uf the tws af us. I was absolutely the rncre conviricingtranny Gtorcr. So at this point Jor Fe*ci covsred his e;rs with his hand nndloCIksd sway, end then shot The llducsfion erf Time in *re si*nruch)

: The Sducntio* of Time: Not the Gut Jooo no* $e Sut..,".,Hea]*rhchh

;ffff;rThffik csd" Joc Pesei he would trc$r kitled us b*th(Editor's notE: Attlris point, for reasons I mey never understcnd, Joe Pesciin hls lnfEnitc rvisdsm tr:nred end Ehot me in the l*g l lurehed back inro thetable behind me and sent Eorssht hurling ncrmss rhe room. Thetnight ffi

-*:FraRk-s smelt of a hellish combination sibotscht erndblood.) F#qree**

So *afs hw I spenr my $$nmerlracarion. The entire unahridgcd version sfmy sanrrner v*cation will bc csmrn* out in a scri€s of Jof, chapb*oks to beqvail*l* *n rsilo*,#llx s$.s{}}wherx,HIRAIV Q L|CLY l

Editar without Sorders, l

II

I

RO(K#Rruflil DIYfr,!ftt*rints: L }"jl"n ftorf *fe {viq tnr,oak}

*, $ffi,-T"rt F**r r,l*'rt {x;+h Firu'nesri

r{. p*u*f6ps {rr6{16*t#l&_*gtl**}f lq;tl$; l. fiJ',"*eeJ ilvc* fn*i*, u* * {sal*c**vst&n*. Kn;{;r,'lf t an KinS

?" (l'*.'*ttt frff*n *r - 4

5+qfl$:t:. f*;ft {*hg ir*&Ha*J cunJ *n#*-ff1*p*mfnr.H::n

*{rtn5h;- " Iw%t*'iY$t^nfrn fhr fr.ssftm f*r$l** *$

*tfue sler*c,* fi fufenro,.T H.

- {,6nrfe

I{" S*ft#lx f ff *vr thr rh*,r#*u**l d,i<_ins r-dr; g:"ftf do;-" ** _*

ffi@t'*;Jffi,rd*w{o

iwic*g ffi*'* aaad ffi*e"r't*

l. dive inta spting, sunffner: and winter, but not ftll. it'sprickl_v- at the boitom. =utr*ryGGEM.rE

*o underwater pmpo**ls cr businsn* m tin$& thatns

ffiwm Sc?efif*s

FIsh**. The caudal exteneipn* nf a eetnce*nlfsrrn ths f*rked, horir*ntal S*hlitm tail.

Bl*u&ol*" Thn h*te in s cetac*art'u trend t?rrsushwhich lt brcntbc* snd it* *pcut passex

WJacques-Yves Cousteau

[- l4ur s*n*#df Br*^t

6. S* *achl lkt S* i

7. SolJr5"lld

t#iftt fc rr*f*ol ilifa

{${: $'r*irr ffi"rlTllout Pi*Atr \*/ir^p1"5ec*ion o f Dr,Sc,

$rs*i6"r *{ r,f*r gon'fCaat"cl f'of h rr

ry. ?l*3 Tar*k i*l* effpt,

s$ r S*c+ {npr un{il j* i 5

7' Glve ar **r? Bo** on o!J,ro

*e-anY ut hf:l 'bfl Pn*J.r";r,g cr&jrfc ufttltlrr wss**' u"nl-uffi ro*re rhfff efu*ett fruns

I

la &oc H l"lsJrn*$tly,.J

*;{"1*f**r*r jVo*t* lor*;$rJ *$ su li$b.*_v{fig Ssur,c*F'"n eo *er-6;a nrfa{ pvrfagts o nlf5.::,"J Mr*J

.il,r, o* rrirr^s;iii",{ yootlYl-:-u{ r f hi* *r cox iro e rf & f ?nrrre rF;st#"sr phiir ***fltr* in$ a{- u sin\*kircr*f;#.

cwf,bp*n inra r*at

'qr:}ffI.*gfilfrSffi'$'Wg

df*ra$*n*a**utu uh

ffp aflventute'efuA a* b***t n*mn*ged thi* y*nr es*eare the gracious recipienls of the prestigious Stephen BaldwinAward f'or Resssro.h in Advensed Urifisr-y Studies. As a result"we only have time to release a list of this year's UrinationAdventure Club Awards Nominees.

L rvhcsver wvCIte **THI$ IS SPA$(T,4il{rL{Al!!10' on atcilet papet dispenser.

3. high powered hand dryers at the world es.ehan&eqenhe.

3. the peqpetual p*ol *f xrine under the rlrinal in themen's room on the first floor of the library.

dl" tlro glorious rstum qfFenis Hamel at Mike-s Place

$" the guy whn a*ked *enu t*king a shit' eh?*' from thenext stall"

6. anybsdy whc claps wftile You Pee.7. the ninjadeuce

$nnd ycur v*fe$ ffnd *thernoffiinatisns t*.+r rLuttt. r:tij;1tiJr:lg$l11Ci l,gg41 ff

s#re.

st

t

1II

IIII

I1

81{

"tr"lrix insrslrrrcnl gf .glr llrli yrxitll* lxginlr 1{.'itfu n st*r}'rreld*ti tur n* *rlsji{i**al oh$r;tu {}tltllur;k1, hu:irrrrdsl l" I tr:ive a li!*ntl s'ho ,it *rrrving t* I:!{'.1, $aitl trir:rxJ is *elllng til'ftisr,:ut,iris kurlll lirr l*gi*tiual und I'inan*lril r*a"rir.ra*attarh*d t* thi* tn*r'*. lhtlr*ghl.*ut the

rvnnining lilt *f{er h* ll$il &rlsl th* r*uj*rili' r)f his c*llEi:t*r pi**es f* til{3r{)t}$ ,*r'illirrg t* prt}

: srrmi4 *l'nrqlllsl tt? qrr&.n trll"{Si1; lh*] r;4uld hg.Ur rrn nnglhst tntxliUnl firr ll'tl] Irsx,

lSccauxr- tlltr*. arr;r $ fit*Bbtir {rf r*i;{:rrdti *$nr halr*ll t h*.-*:r"t h**ntl yut, *r h&l'cil'i lr*irrel o[,I'nr Lnsi**l|1 "ju,q gnnn* plit r.nlrr tlt1" $nd rf${}rd rny lhs'r:rlt$iorr:' untii X think I hil lh* nnil()n thr: hs*ri rl'ill' nl{)r* {}f l*s.* *ltere ths alhurtt'* ricltMll g{l" il'X*rr thi*k this ix s$lliindulgentS*u'ru prt#nhly right. hut you prminrhlf *ls* llke l$r$t-r{}(k, iurrJ thi* ix the lucscrn{'hu-$ n'r{slurh:rl*t. {itl${}, Iu*k 1*u}.

uffit#-fiffii*rn ths el*ad nrtthr:rfu*ksr:rl1 !

lrninru* y3'k l'*r *i{intl* $il!i$i{jrit yr'lu g* pick s|:ll!t* $p rigbt norr,. }*ut rvr:itiltg itn! t}'t{rr*,grxn* list*u t* tlu uller xi*lt i*lst*rtltl.

rtur.rutteu * nnti nrw h*{k l{r *ur prrrgr*r*ningI h*lq brth hr.:arrJ rrl'l*nrl llrj*rd llu$.ri:rtt(n b"lirr*, -l'hi* lpx*undl lili**tt$-rrr8*rr"I"lr[t i;c

slt ,

"l'lrc rlterl -.your la*l riits e"p, {dend$live}Peuplu terl! ft{ itll th{i tinrc abrlu{ h*t lvir:li*ti rhir lwnd is. rn**tl1 irr {h$ elxltr*rit.tlt''"lht}'ruls tnrJ hllteil't rel*;l-csd n:u*h." Nuedtrrlx* t* s$"\,, 1 r!'rls prett5 sterhr:d t.r $rt l(l list*n t* il

,,u${ $rut thu ne+dfu tluun nnd hilll' lilck lhis ir, lrrrlzing. Supnrprd *p, pis*e.tl ol{

tuude*n: lhe wu1' y*ur *rtlther nr$de i{ to ri'rsnrl {in tfri* {:{$e }{}$r rnrrt}rcr isirlhn hfittltxrnard neglr{il* sFFriln*lr!" $irnnds lik* being lire li*d h,v n ehrir'ulitlv, ffr*at xhit^

artirtrus pyle - civil desd {prnnk}I trhrme Jr.rt hriving hearrl nny-tlring b1' thi* brxrrl )'{t orl ur}' tr*3 i*hling lratr*rl *lf rrll lhingrnh-rnnlnl. lh*twll**rrrirtnk*. ltkir*s*ll l inn*ro*lrslyrnriughrtithxlff iudlssi.rttnnlr:h*nlx u*ci t{i:}mc Su}, tnlking in * t*ilct hnrvl sharttering ilc*p nr*rnhl*, lutd lih,j ttrttr{

lhrirshyl'r:nlsl1 uerirril*;,or.larr:.iustw'rri{in$lirritt*gt:rl**tlnruiInrr.'l"he nlt'esttrt*urnrls**l'rhis record is arr*-<tlf in hrlr, fir,ll,ing nr*tal il iri. liri* *hit rules vr fbr, "li:t{rk t* litttre hreltlrrlr

elurinp "ir:.i*srief il1 tilrflh rilfint:" t* ru,ar{ xhc lirt*r ttrurr*. antl }rnd nrl as*h*le hlutr u upne'hu'rr'l r*li*l thst ther*:lr*9n1."- I *f lfienr, [.ilrlik* mnst rultl$ss$ irr lhi* gennl, ["rll m:tuall3'

hllt lnarr';tvbr t lr*songprit ing,thqre du**x*are. IIylrulike trngedylhi*hurgisg*neJlnlnl ashcs rix*lcru*E tltmshcor* $${ l?{}ln liu*ndirrtl in a*tl yritr drrt'l hmle tlny

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Strong intentio.n - what elsr cRn we do but fight back?Do rar scunds lrke pretr] 'run.ot thc nri l l pr*, 'cr violencc-ish punk rock. It.s alriglrr... oorr,

[::r;lf;t:* rift" yeah. r'rl pr*iilv risren r* rhis asarn nu rlln'i'oi rrn*r otrui%*rry...

Locust/arab on radar split seven inch

IT :::ku ttring about rhis record is thar ir\ shagnd rike a pucrcile antr is brown. II remcmber seeing rhis at rcconr *,rn*., ii[. *urtlil. i;ffi;",i#.*i;l;,rs lnli*n, t u,

t .'l-r:1$:-decidlng nm ro. r rron'r have anvrhing againsr eirrrc'orrr,c*. unn,li, thev do

* called 'angry thalidomidc babies.' Hory fuck, after <toubie.h;-kiil;;i;b-i ;;;;;;,I *:l::":::,,1::.il'.15: :lrl,har.s,*r,y tr,.,ln;n t','i,,"r,,",,?,"liiii iii,r',ri,p.i"nor'sovcrnmenr issue. thcy werep*rily iriends. Thdil;;iri,il;;ffi;;;ffiii,i,]1,'.ia

I B.tta say l'm imprcs.sed. Kinda r_bcr rike dancing .n,r huii"ng n*[;;. '* - "-"

the rvhole-\pasric grin<J-drunrs with synrh unct tt""*iira;ttl.;;.jj.-ij;;t;;;i;""" ""ahour. ir. tf ;;;; irnn*r"*ur stiil around, i *.,rr,r riifi,l.rok ar rhis ...or,t .u*ry,#lt,

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rvent in and ultirnatell, rvr:ulcl still proily dccide n,,i io "uy

,,.

Sons of lshmael * hayseed hardcore

l$!,tr.catu "gfilq alxrrrr rhesc guys, aside rrom that trrcy rv*e canadian and used ro be

.Uotfu.r.ing.o* - Vr ;; $r*k)really cool intro, srveet drums innit. Vocalsjust kicked in. really metal-influenced erind"super tirst. Kinda t'unky bassline. All in nll l'rn really digging it. lf l<.ru sped upRationjscrucilixion this is prubabl.v rvhat thcy rvould sound like. I reallt'like hearing muric lik*ifri.s lhat is obvio.usly so concerncd wirh be ing chaotic and maliing you rvanna break shit.bul without sacrificing confol or being too contrived. Holy shit- there was iust a sneakinepart and it's a girl doing the dcmon-scream vocals. l)ucking rnii. Not to sound likj a dick-,but harrloorr i1 sqc.h a boys club thal u-hcn there's a nan-rjude doing something and it4o*n'r suck (io.king ar i,ru uiiini ti1llr j''l';,".k;;;-;;J;,fh;;;'-^'i;iliura.

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Frus $hryt Fictinn * Yau 6*t Wlr*t you p*y Fsr i

f i '1" Her nnrfte was Jaetine, snd she had thighs liks treetrunks" ftg G**rge, did he want to Se the lumberja*k who,@lhs{ up thcuel The thnught sf it r*ads him smeer atlfm *f s.slivn seross hi* swcllen b*ttonn lip with hi*tnrrgu*, like an p{d wCIr*an Xibarnlly b

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E; $iaryAnno war $ * tough spot. $he Xe*pxrnt*lywxnied ta lnvite Tcd in * sh*? wxnt*d hirn to qorfte lla*kto hq1 place since the first drunken night thet'* speni

- - -topeth*r at &e rnoter on 32nd. urrforlu*atsri, tha mfuu,of her kitchen wails was preventing her frorniettina tiim-past the daonray. How exacffy ddyou erptain iosomsone that you just had to $ave b roo'ri tha colour ofltre. yoryit stain they left on your shoe? And oh God, he,iy*,nad ta rumernber it; afrer afl, theyd Aom renni*pdthe beauty nf the ficlcur, and truth he trld, sfro cpu$ ,rn,ors *a*ily fu*mr his enssr th*n his fbrgetfufnu*s.

It wae just a *nn'nat day in the perk untirl $tsv*n's*arlry urapped aut an diarnorrd" *r rnther, a turd '

pf*a*ed thsn if hlo *Nd*rly neighbwr h*d dlrud uuddenly,

hritfr a dinrnond ahining dimly frnm wlthin R" 'lfiffist s idis*overyl' thcught Stiv*n, l-ta *ouldn't hava been rncre'

leaking a $tenrh ints hie cwn apartnner* and xlerting himto tha fsct that the ald wnrn&n's pq**ensions wsr* lying inwait fsr hirn, unplund*red and exp**lant, fikt xybridegroorn at the altar.

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bre*d.,

l.t{",fF*GRy wHILil A t{${J$H X$ #f{ ruRr

Sy S{i*k i{r*shnererrks

moury-mo€ey slawty

lSsRONsOFr I irI;SEMF4ERSHT I

by the ethno'partoment_" where to gc

when close tq hnme?Dcn't *'1tffifm+get sorn* Pf.tO' ,

st the scenetravesty L

irrturo all the-slrens be?

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kffi*"sryff:ffWfl.gy#,ltor, caused by the rising of warm'air in that area' 1