Drafting: Writing the Body of a Paper

Introduction

Creating unity in your writing

Giving your writing coherence

Direct references

Transitional expressions

Elaborating on your ideas

Sensory details

Facts and statistics

Examples and anecdotes

Expert opinions

Your Turn 1: Create coherence and unity

Your Turn 2: Elaborate on ideas

Introduction

A complicated machine can’t work unless all of its parts function together properly. Each part affects the other parts’ capabilities to perform their designated tasks. The parts of a composition should function together in a similar way.

Introduction

Writing the body of a composition is more than merely translating ideas from your head onto paper. You’ve got to present a complete, well-conceived set of ideas that work together to communicate a point. To do that, pay attention to these qualities of good writing:

3. Elaboration—each idea is fully developed

2. Coherence—the ideas are strongly connected

1. Unity—all parts work to support the main idea

Creating unity in your writing

Your writing has unity if all of its parts function together as one. The details in each paragraph should support the paragraph’s main idea, and all of the paragraphs in the paper should work together to support and elaborate upon the paper’s thesis.

Creating unity in your writing

Trey wrote the following paragraph as part of a paper on the history of NASCAR racing.

When he reread his paragraph, he discovered that it lacked unity.

does not support main idea

NASCAR racing began at the close of World War II. World War II was a time that saw tremendous growth in factory production. produced weapons for the war nowtechnology to build new types of cars. people enjoyed driving these new, powerful vehicles, and they soon started organizing their own races.

Factories that hadused their

Young

Giving your writing coherence

Ideas within a piece of writing must be coherent and clearly show the connection between ideas.

There are many strategies for creating coherent writing. These include using direct references and appropriate transitions to connect sentences and ideas.

Some scientists believe that exercise leads to the creation of new neurons, or nerve cells, in the brain. They argue that exercise may therefore slow the process of memory loss in aging people.

Some scientists believe that exercise leads to the creation of new neurons, or nerve cells, in the brain. They argue that exercise may therefore slow the process of memory loss in aging people.

Exercise is not only good for your body. Exercise can also help treat depression and improve memory. Exercise is not only good for your body. Exercise can also help treat depression and improve memory.

Giving your writing coherence Direct references

One way to create coherence within a paragraph is to make a direct reference to a key word or idea that came immediately before. You can

• use pronouns to refer to nouns used earlier

• repeat key words and phrases

Depression is related to low levels of serotonin and norepinephrine. During exercise, the brain releases more of these neurotransmitters.

Depression is related to low levels of seratonin and norepinephrine. During exercise, the brain releases more of these neurotransmitters.

Giving your writing coherence Direct references

• use synonyms or rewordings of key words and ideas

because, since, so that, therefore, thus

Showing cause and effect

first, last, mainly, to begin withShowing importance

in, on, above, here, thereShowing place

after, then, next, first, meanwhileShowing time

still, but, in spite of, however, yetContrasting ideas

also, and, another, similarlyComparing ideas

Transitional expressions connect ideas and make relationships between ideas clear. Here are some common transitional expressions:

Giving your writing coherence Transitional expressions

Some people saw the appeal of car racing, and tried to make the sport official. As a result, different organizations, such as the National Stock Car Racing Association and the National Championship Stock Car Circuit, cropped up with their own guidelines and rules for car racing. However, because there were so many organizations, the sport could not become a national phenomenon.

Giving your writing coherence

Notice how Trey achieved coherence within this paragraph by rewording and repeating key terms and by using transitional expressions.

rewords key idea

shows cause and effect

repeats key termshows contrastshows cause and effect

Elaborating on your ideas

When you elaborate your ideas, you develop your thesis within the body paragraphs to form a complete work. Each paragraph should have a clear main idea developed with elaborating details, which include

• sensory details

• facts and statistics

• examples

• anecdotes

• expert opinios

Elaborating on your ideas Sensory details

Sensory details appeal to the five senses—sight, hearing, taste, touch, and smell. These types of details help the reader visualize and “experience” what you are writing about.

The roar of powerful waterfalls fills your ears. On either side of you, 3,000 feet of sheer granite walls rise up. You are standing in Yosemite Valley, one of the most popular tourist attractions in America.

Elaborating on your ideas Facts and statistics

Facts are statements that can be proved true.

Statistics are facts in number form.

Yosemite Valley was created by glacial erosion.

Of the nine waterfalls that cascade into the valley, five are over 1,000 feet. Yosemite Falls is 2,425 feet.

Examples are specific instances, or illustrations, of a general idea.

Elaborating on your ideas Examples and anecdotes

There are many spectacular views along the Yosemite Valley rim. Some of these points are Yosemite Falls, Glacier Point, Half Dome, and El Capitan.

Anecdotes are brief personal stories used to illustrate an idea.

The hike to reach Glacier Point was treacherous. We encountered steep, rocky terrain that made our muscles seem to scream out in pain. The view from the valley rim, though, was enough to make every cramp and ache worthwhile.

Elaborating on your ideas Expert opinions

Expert opinions are statements made by reliable authorities on a given subject.

Yosemite National Park rangers advise hikers to bring plenty of food and water, as well as layers of warm clothing, since the weather conditions can change rapidly.

Elaborating on your ideas

Here is a paragraph from Trey’s essay. What types of elaboration did he use?

Bill France decided that all of the groups should come up with one set of regulations so that car racing could become an official national sport. In December 1947, he called the leaders of the car racing organizations together. After four days of working out the rules, NASCAR, the National Association for Stock Car Auto Racing, was born. Today, NASCAR is the most popular spectator sport in America. Over 75 million fans watch cars race at speeds up to 248 miles per hour.

fact

statisticfact

main idea

Your Turn 1: Create coherence and unity

Revise the paragraph by adding direct references and transitional expressions. Delete any sentence that interferes with the paragraph’s unity.

Teenagers have different sleeping patterns than younger children and adults. Their circadian rhythms, or internal “clocks,” change. The hormone melatonin is produced later at night in teens. Melatonin can make it harder to fall asleep early. They need to go to sleep later and wake up later. Melatonin is also what causes “jet lag.”

Your Turn 2: Elaborate on ideas

Consider a subject you know well and write down a topic sentence for a paragraph on that subject. Then, write a paragraph that elaborates on that topic sentence.

Types of elaboration:• sensory details• facts and statistics• examples• anecdotes• expert opinions

The End