ed batista, interpersonal dynamics (aka touchy feely) @stanfordbiz, class 1: beginnings

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Dynamics Interpersonal Ed Batista Winter 2017 CLASS 1: BEGINNINGS

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Page 1: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Dynamics InterpersonalEd BatistaWinter 2017CLASS 1: BEGINNINGS

Page 2: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Foundational conceptsIntroduce our staff4 exercises in pairsSmall group discussionFinal commentsHere until 5:50pm

Today’s agenda

Photo by Theresa Thompson [link]

Page 3: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Who am I?

Executive coach, GSB Lecturer & alumnusContributor @HarvardBizThe Art of Self-Coachingwww.edbatista.com

Page 4: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Why this coursematters to me…

Impact on my career, marriage & lifeUltimately led me to coaching20+ groups, 250+ students

Page 5: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Photo by U.S. Army [link]

I will…Give you my bestWelcome inputEnd on time

What else would be helpful for you?

Workingagreements

Page 6: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

WorkingagreementsI ask you to…

Page 7: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Photo by Luz Adriana Villa [link]

WorkingagreementsI ask you to…Start on time

Page 8: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

WorkingI ask you to…Challenge yourself

agreements

Photo by Daniel Oines [link]

Page 9: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

WorkingI ask you to…Minimizedistractions

agreements

Photo by Robert S. Donovan [link]

Page 10: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

WorkingI ask you to…Respectconfidentiality

agreements

Photo by Vox Efx [link]

Page 11: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

WorkingI ask you to…Start on timeChallenge yourselfMinimize distractionsRespect confidentiality

Can we all commit to this?

agreements

Page 12: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Some basic

Photo by O C Always [link]

concepts

Page 13: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Learning & stressYerkes-Dodson Law (Harvard

psychologists, 1908)Arousal improves performance up to a pointModest stress = More effective learningToo much stress = No learning

Page 14: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Learning & stress

Stress

Learning

Page 15: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Learning & stressHans Selye, Université de Montréal

Eustress & distress

Page 16: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Learning & stress

Stress

Learning

Eustress Distress

Page 17: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Learning & stress

Stress

Learning

Eustress Distress

Essential to push yourself…

Page 18: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Learning & stress

Stress

Learning

Eustress Distress

…but not past the tipping point

Page 19: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Learning & stress

Stress

Learning

Eustress Distress

Only you know where it is

Page 20: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Learning & stress

Stress

Learning

Eustress Distress

THIS is the goal

Page 21: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Learning & stress

Stress

Learning

Eustress Distress

NOT this

Page 22: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Feedback is…StressfulConfusingUnwelcome

Page 23: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

An actual giftNo stressNo confusionAlways welcome

Page 24: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

If it’s not a giftIt’s data……on your response to their behavior…& on their response to your behavior

what is it?

Page 25: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

If it’s not a giftIt may be directiveStop…Start…Do more…Do less…

what is it?

Page 26: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

If it’s not a giftBut it’s not……a commandment…nor do we have a duty to obey

what is it?

Page 27: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

It’s not like this…

Page 28: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

It’s like this

Photo by Unknown. Concept by Kevin Martin.

Page 29: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

A model can help

Page 30: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

When you do [X], I feel [Y].

The simplestfeedback model

Page 31: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

When you do [X], I feel [Y].

Page 32: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Emotions areattention magnets

Photo by Garrett Mace [link]

Page 33: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Emotions areattention magnetsDisclosing feelings can be

uncomfortableBut we’re wired to respond to emotionAnd vulnerability can create intimacyComfort with discomfort

Page 34: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Introductions

Photo by Gideon Tsang [link]

Page 35: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Our FacilitatorsThey’re NOT…In charge of the T-groupAny more (or less) responsible for outcomes

Page 36: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Our FacilitatorsThey ARE…In a dual role (also members)In a differentiated role (not always members)

Page 37: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Our FacilitatorsDon HejnaLela DjakovicMark VoorsangerRich KassSue NevilleTuquynh Tran

Page 38: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

And a guestBrian Lowery

Page 39: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Reading CoachesGSB-trained Facilitators

Comment on portions of written workPurpose is to support your learning in T-group

Page 40: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Reading CoachesStephanie Stevens

GSB FacilitatorDigital MediaGroup 1 (Half)(Don & Lela)

Page 41: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Reading CoachesSunny Sabbini

GSB FacilitatorTherapist/MediatorGroup 1 (Half)(Don & Lela)

Page 42: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Reading CoachesNorman Tran

GSB FacilitatorProduct DesignGroup 2(Rich & Tuquynh)

Page 43: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Reading CoachesJamila Rufaro

Senior FacilitatorStanford PhDGroup 3(Mark & Sue)

Page 44: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Reading CoachesYou’ll hear from them next week

Your Coach is here to support youI strongly encourage you to engage them

Page 45: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Competencies & challenges

Photo by Anne Worner [link]

Page 46: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

CompetenciesInterpersonal Dynamics ReaderInterpersonal & group competenciesChallenges in interpersonal learning

& challenges

Page 47: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

CompetenciesWe’re all asking ourselves…What skills do I bring?What skills do I lack?Reflect

& challenges

Page 48: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Share withOne skill I’m bringingOne skill I’m lacking

your partner

Page 49: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Safety, trust,

Photo by Carly Lesser & Art Drauglis [link]

intimacy

Page 50: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

CONTEXT Learning,

Awareness,& Behavioral

Change

Experimentation,Risk-Taking,

& Vulnerability

Safety, Trust, Intimacy

Initial Conditions

Page 51: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Safety, trust,What characterizes a group with these qualities?What behaviors contribute to them?What behaviors detract from them?

intimacy

Page 52: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Safety, trust,Reframe the questions…How do I personally contribute to these qualities?How do I personally detract from them?Reflect

intimacy

Page 53: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Share withHow I tend to create safety, trust & intimacyHow I tend to diminish safety, trust & intimacy

your partner

Page 54: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Safety & stress

Stress

Learning

Eustress Distress

Safety is a necessary condition…

Page 55: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Safety & stress

Stress

Learning

Eustress Distress

…not a final destination

Page 56: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Social identity

Photo by Anne Worner [link]

Page 57: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Social identityA core theme in this courseReferenced most weeks & the focus of Week 5

Page 58: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Social identityHalvorson (Getting to “Us”)Positive impact in the workplaceSense of group identity

= Higher morale & productivity

Page 59: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Social identityHenri Tajfel & John TurnerGroup memberships shape individual identityStems from a basic cognitive process

= Tendency to group things together

Page 60: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Social identityBut we exaggerate…1. Differences between groups2. Similarities within groups

= Inevitable stereotypes

Page 61: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Social identityContinuum of social behavior IntergroupInterpersonal

Page 62: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Intergroup

Photo by U.S. Army [link]

Page 63: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Intergroup

Photo by Neon Tommy [link]

Page 64: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Interpersonal

Photo by Tania Cataldo [link]

Page 65: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

It’s usually both

Photo by Anne Worner [link]

Page 66: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Note….Social identity transcends gender, ethnicity, etc.Categorical relevance is highly subjective

Page 67: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

On the cover…Write down the visible

social identitiesthat matter to you

Getting to knowyou (better)

Page 68: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Inside…Write down the invisible ones

Getting to knowyou (better)

Page 69: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

What social identities matter most to me?How might they impact me here?

Share withyour partner

Page 70: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Final comments

Photo by Sarah Joy [link]

Page 71: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Myths & legends

Photo by Terence Faircloth [link]

Page 72: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Logistics

Photo by Glyn Lowe [link]

Page 73: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Add/dropFri Jan 13, 11:59pmWhy might you consider dropping?

deadline

Page 74: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Photo by dcjohn [link]

Attendance

Page 75: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

AttendanceEvery class and T-group session is mandatoryUnexcused absences drop grade 1 full levelNo allowances for interviews, recruiting, other classes, weddings, family events or…

Page 76: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

February 14

Photo by Floris Oosterveld [link]

Page 77: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

February 14Details in the Course ManualPlan to hold T-groups as scheduledMay start at 6pm if all 14 members agreeMay move to Wed or Thurs if all 14 members

agree on a 3-hour block before 10:30pmWhy such a strict policy?

Page 78: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

February 14

Page 79: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

February 14My responsibility as facultyCreate optimal learning conditionsProtect rights of those not going to VegasRemaining in this section is a commitment

to abide by the terms of the Course Manual

Page 80: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Canvas

Page 81: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

CanvasEverything is onlineCourse Manual (Required for today)Syllabus (Replicated in weekly modules)Modules (Readings, class notes & assignments)Assignments (Left menu & bottom of home page)Problems? [email protected]

Page 82: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Weekly reading

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 100

1020304050607080

Page 83: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Assignments

Photo by Anonymous Collective [link]

Page 84: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

AssignmentsTwo weekly assignments*Pre-Class: Due Mondays @ NoonPost-Group: Due Thursdays @ NoonAlways check the Readings & Class Notes page

Page 85: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Next stepsSee Week 2 Readings & Class Notes on CanvasWeek 2 Pre-Class Assignment due Mon @ NoonWeek 2 Tues Jan 12, 3pm hereFirst T-group 7-10pm

Page 86: Ed Batista, Interpersonal Dynamics (aka Touchy Feely) @StanfordBiz, Class 1: BEGINNINGS

Dynamics InterpersonalFor more:www.edbatista.com/interpersonal-dynamics.html