effects of divorce to children

7/26/2019 Effects of Divorce to Children

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Short-term Effects of Divorce on Children

Most people would agree that divorce affects all the children in the family at some time and to some degree.

Some of the effects show signs instantly following the separation and some of these increase over the first

years of divorce and then decline; still some may still emerge.

There are a lot of factors that lead to the negative eects to children. Ex.Children are almost burdened by greater responsibilities and feel less caredfor. It might be possible that when a marriage ends, especially if it ends in anangry conict, parents can experience a decline in their deep feelings fortheir children and the extent to which they voluntarily undertaeresponsibilities for the children.

!nother factor is the non"custodial parent, who is usually the father, tends todisengage from his children over the years following a divorce. ! nurturingfather"child relationship is vital for the children#s long"term development.$ithout such relationship, children may experience emotional frustration andconfusion.

%ender of the custodial parent might play a part in determining the impact of

divorce to children. There is some evidence that children tend to show moreproblems if they are in the custody of a parent of the opposite sex than aparent of the same sex. Inter"parental conict has powerful direct eects onchildren#s functioning.

Specific short-term effects may include the following:

- anger

- sadness

- depression

- opposition

- impulsivity

- aggression

- non-compliance

- perceived parental loss

- interpersonal conflict

- economic hardship

- life stress

- less parental supervision

- less consistent discipline

- more negative sanctions

- lower academic achievement

- acting out

- lower self-concept

- social adjustment difficulty- increased dependency

Many of these short-term effects can adversely affect long-term development in that they build up over

time. The intensity and longevity of each problem is determined by these characteristics related to positive

post-divorce adjustment:

Parental ability to resolve post-divorce conflict and anger.

bility of the custodial parent to successfully resume the parenting role.


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bility of the non-custodial parent to maintain a mutually satisfying relationship with the child or children.

Personality characteristics of the child and the ability to develop coping s!ills.

bility of the child to find and use support systems.

"iminished depressive or angry responses by the child. The age and se# of the child.

Long-term Efects o Divorce$indings from several research studies indicate that certain effects of divorce are %uite persistent even when a

wide range of pre-divorce conditions is considered. &onsider some of the summary statements from a few

of these studies:

'(esearch suggests that problematic par-ent-child relations associated with divorce persist

throughout the life course.) *mato and +ooth,/0.

'1ne cannot predict long-term effects of divorce on children from how they react at the outset.)

*2allerstein, 30.

'...the long-term conse%uences of parental divorce for adult attainment and %uality of life may

prove to be more serious than the short-term emotional and social problems in children.)

*mato 4 5eith, 0

'...children from disrupted families are significantly more li!ely to e#press discontent with their

lives as measured by an inde# of life satisfaction.) *$urstenberg 4 Teitler, 60.

There are cases where children can e#perience what might be called the 'sleeper effect). They tend to recover

%uic!ly following the divorce, but because of denied feelings at a subconscious level, feelings about the

divorce may emerge at some point later in life. 7t is a delayed reaction. Professional counselors have shown

that all !inds of traumatic e#periences of childhood can somehow be repressed in the subconscious. 8#.

Se#ual abuse or physical abuse might be 'forgotten) for years but emerge at some later point in adulthood.

t a 9-year follow-up, one study of divorced children *2allerstein, 390 showed:

. Persistence of anger at the parent who had initiated the divorce.. 7ntensity of longing for the absent or erratically visiting parent.

. Persistence of youngsteruotes from the young adults themselves:

'My life would have been happier if myparents hadn


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'7 wish my mom and dad had not divorced. 7t would have been easier to be a regular family.)

'7 was really hurt. The hardest thing was watching my family brea! up.)

'7t was only when 7 was a student in an $S family abroad that 7 got to see parents who %uarrel

and ?positively@ resolve the argument.)lthough most of these young adults had arrived at the understanding that the divorce had been a wise decision,many of them remained critical of both parents for having made the mista!e of a misguided marriage. They

were especially critical of their parents for not having rectified the mista!e before the children were born.

Many of these youngsters describe themselves as having emerged stronger and more independent as a

conse%uence of their parents< divorce. Aet there was a bittersweet %uality to their statements.

. Physically, these participants reported poorer physical health than children from intact families.

. 8motionally, they indicated persistent problems with the following:

$ears of betrayal, abandonment, loss, and rejection.

(ising an#iety in late teens and early =sBfeel-ings and memories about their parents< divorce arise with

new intensity as they enter adulthood. Cife-long vulnerability to the e#perience of loss.

nger, resentment, and hostility.

reduction in psychological well-being. "epression in young adulthood.

Cow life satisfaction.

9. Socially, the children


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positive relationship with a set of grandparents who stayed out of the parental conflict and identified and

met children

effects of divorce to children

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