w w w . n c c d d . o r g

First

Peopleelementaryguide to

understandingdisabilities

North Carolina Council on Developmental Disabilities

K-5

People First K-5

Have you ever noticed that other people don’t look just l ike you do? Or talk just l ike you? Or think just l ike you? Or act just l ike you?

Everybody is different. Even identical twins aren’t exactly the same. Each person is unique—one of a kind.

People come in al l shapes and sizes. They have different hair styles, skin colors or are tal ler or shorter. Some people are quiet and

others may talk a lot . There are those who l ike to play sports and others who are into music.

There are lots of ways to be d i fferent .

Sometimes, a person’s difference is called a disability. A disability can be many things—it may mean that a person’s body doesn’t work in the same way that

other people’s bodies work. It may mean someone can’t hear or see or speak. It can also mean that someone has a harder time learning new things.

People with disabilities might use a wheelchair or use their hands to talk to their friends, or they might sound or look different. Sometimes you can’t even

tell if a person has a disability—someone who has asthma or seizures may not look like he or she has a disability.

People First K-5 is for kids with or without disabilities, as well as for the adults who work with them. This booklet will help you learn the best words or phrases to use whentalking about your own disability or someone else’s. There are also tips that will help

you feel more comfortable with each other as you play and go to school together.

Remember, we are all people first. Let’s cherish and celebrate our differences. It’s what makes each of us special.

Robert J. “Bob” Rickelman, ChairNC Council on Developmental Disabilities

Talk ing about disabi l i t ies

Sometimes the way people think about otherswith disabilities is based on how they hearpeople talk about people with disabilities—the words they use and what they say.

For example, have you ever heard someonesay something mean orteasing about a person with adisability? Or have youheard someone being called aname—such as “retard”—asan insult? This kind oflanguage can hurt people’sfeelings, whether they have adisability or not.

One of the ways you can letpeople with disabilities—andall minority groups—knowthey are accepted andincluded is to use respectful language.

This kind of language is called people firstlanguage. When you use people firstlanguage, you are focusing on the person andnot the disability. If you are using peoplefirst language, then instead of talking about“the disabled” or “the handicapped,” youwould say, “people with disabilities.” You

would not say, “Mary is blind,” becauseMary is much more than that. You wouldsay, “Mary is a ‘person’ who is blind” whenyou use people first language.

Remember, the person is not the disability.While you or your friendsmay have a disability, that’snot who you or they are; it’sjust one part of the wholeperson. They are funny,smart, fast, have beautifulhair, love games—there areso many other ways todescribe people. When youtalk about a friend withoutdisabilities, do you describehim as, “That’s Joe and hedoesn’t have a disability?”Probably not.

When you do talk about a person’s disability,there are right and wrong ways of doing it.The following are some of the right—peoplefirst—ways of talking about disabilities andsome of the wrong ways.

PeopleFirst

People or individuals with disabilitiesThe handicapped, special needs, challenged;afflicted with a disability; suffers from adisability

Samantha, who uses a wheelchair The girl in the wheelchair; wheelchair-bound

A woman with paraplegia, a man that hasquadriplegia

A paraplegic, a quadriplegic; crip, a cripple

A class for children with disabilities A handicapped class

Person without a disability A normal person

Person with mental illnessThe mentally ill; the emotionally disturbed;insane; crazy; demented; psycho; lunatic

Accessible bus/parking space Handicapped bus/parking space

People with intellectual disabilities; people withcognitive disabilities

Retarded people, mentally retarded

A person who has Down syndrome or a personwith Down syndrome

Down’s kids, Mongoloid

She is a little person, or she is of short stature She’s a dwarf/midget

He has a brain injury He is brain damaged

There are a few exceptions. Some people with disabilities choose not to use people firstlanguage. For example, some people with hearing impairments refer to themselves as Deaf witha capital “D” because they consider themselves a minority with their own culture and language,called American Sign Language. The best thing to do is to ask what words the person prefers touse. It’s a great conversation starter!

People F irstlanguage

Old stereotypes/d isrespectfu l language

The most important thing is to be yourself.Children with disabilities are just like childrenwithout disabilities. They also want to studyhard, have fun and play with their friends. Talkabout things that you and your friends areinterested in. Don’t worry about using ordinaryphrases, such as “see you later” to a person whois blind or “got to be running along” to someonewho can’t walk.

In addition to using people first language, hereare some other suggestions for talking withpeople with disabilities.

❃ Talk about abilities instead of limitations.Saying, “Caroline is wheelchair-bound,” makesit sound like she can’t do much. Instead, youcould say, “Caroline uses a wheelchair to getaround,” which emphasizes her ability to getplaces. Unless it’s really relevant, don’t evenrefer to the person’s disability. The best way todescribe Caroline may be to say, “Caroline is agreat artist,” which focuses on one of herabilities.

❃ Don’t use words that imply a person with adisability is afflicted with or suffers from theirdisability. Also avoid referring to them asspecial or exceptional.

❃ Don’t talk about “fixing” or “making theperson better.” They might feel just fine, just

like a red-haired person might like how her redhair makes her different.

❃ Don’t assume a person with a disability can’tdo things. They might use assistive devices ortechnology to talk, to walk, or even to drive acar. They might have strengths in manydifferent areas.

❃ When you’re talking with someone with ahearing loss, it’s okay to tap the person on theshoulder or wave your hand to get his or herattention.

❃ When talking with someone who reads lips,talk in a normal tone of voice—don’t try to talkvery slowly or exaggerate the movement of yourlips—and use facial expressions and gestures tohelp the person understand what you are saying.

❃ If you’re talking to someone with a speechdisability—perhaps you have a grandparent whohas had a stroke and now she speaks moreslowly or her speech is slurred—give the personextra time to talk and try not to rush her. Bepatient and don’t speak for the person.

❃ Sometimes you might be talking to someonewho uses an interpreter, a translator or apersonal assistant. Look at the person with thedisability when you’re talking to her, not theinterpreter, translator or personal assistant.

What shou ld I say?

Again, be yourself. If you don’t, both you and theother person will feel uncomfortable and nervous.But here are some tips that will help you as playand study with your friends with disabilities.

❃ If you want to help someone with a disability—perhaps it looks like he needs help pushing hiswheelchair up a ramp—ask first before giving help.Many people with disabilities are very capable oftaking care of their own needs.

❃ If you’re with someone who uses a guide dog orsome other kind of service animal, do not pet ortalk to the animal. These animals are working andshouldn’t be distracted.

❃ Don’t touch a person’s body or any equipmentthat person uses—such as a wheelchair, cane orwalker.

❃ When you talk to someone in a wheelchair, talkdirectly to the person. Try to be at eye level, butdon’t kneel next to the wheelchair. If you need to,take a couple of steps back so the person doesn’thave to strain his neck to look up at you.

In the United States, there are 49million people with disabilities.That means if you divide the wholecountry into groups of five people,one person in each group will havea disability. People withdisabilities make up the largestminority group in the entire United States.

Some people are born withdisabilities. Other people developdisabilities later in life, eithersuddenly, through an accident, orslowly, as a result of an illness oraging. Disability can happen to anyone. It is said that about 60percent of Americans—more thanhalf of us—will have a disability atsome point in our lives.

The lives of people withdisabilities are not very differentfrom people without disabilities.People with disabilities go toschool, play, get married, work,have families, do laundry, goshopping, drive, take vacations,laugh, cry, get angry, and havedreams and goals.

Who are people with disabilities?How shou ld I act?

Activ i ty #1 : What’s it like to…? (Can be done in tandem with activity #2)How does it feel to have a disability? Thisactivity allows young children who do nothave disabilities (or who have differentdisabilities) to empathize with their peerswho have disabilities, or who havedisabilities different from their own.

Time60 minutes

SuppliesBlindfolds, sunglasses, bandannas or scarves,ear plugs, earmuffs, foam rubber or bubblewrap sheets to fit over arms and legs,scissors, duct tape, wheelchairs (may beobtained ahead of time from a doctor’soffice, hospital, nursing home, school nurse,or community center), crutches or a walker,paper and string for making signs, holepunch

Possible disabilities•Limited mobility: Use varying amounts ofbubble wrap or foam rubber and duct tapearound the joints (knees, elbows, wrists) tosimulate arthritis, multiple sclerosis, etc.

• Visual impairments: Use sunglasses,bandannas or scarves to totally or partiallyobscure vision.

• Hearing impairments: Use earplugsand/or earmuffs to simulate partial or severehearing impairments.

• Physical disability: Have children sit inmanual wheelchairs or use crutches or awalker.

ActivityRandomly assign each child a differentdisability or, in a larger group, varyingdegrees of disabilities. Have the children

Games and Act i v i t ies

Activ i ty #2: Disability etiquette (Can be done in tandem with activity #1)Do you know the best way to communicatewith someone who has a disability? Whenshould you offer assistance to someone in awheelchair? This activity offers children away to learn about communicating withpeople who are different.

Time45 minutes – 1.5 hours, dependingon the number of groups

SuppliesNotebook paper for each child, pencils, timer,note cards

ActivityCreate five disability note cards from theideas listed on the next page and divideparticipants into five equal groups. Assign acard to each group to act out in a skit orpractice. After 10 or 15 minutes, each groupperforms two skits: one modeling properetiquette and one showing improper etiquette.

write the name of their disability on apiece of paper and punch two holes tohang the sign around their necks.Decide upon group or individualtasks to try out living with adisability: getting from a classroomto the bathroom, accomplishing aclass project, etc. Have the childrenassist each other throughout the tasks.

Share what happenedAsk the children the followingquestions:

❃ How did it feel to have a“disability?” What did you learn?

❃ What did you have to change?What was easier or harder?

❃ Did you notice you had to rely onother senses or develop new abilities?

❃ Did this change the way you feelabout what it’s like to have adisability?

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1Note card #1: General etiquettefor people with disabilities

Speaking directly to someone with adisability: Don’t talk to a person’scompanion, personal assistant or friend.Instead, talk directly to the person. If youdon’t know whether or not the personshakes hands, you can ask, “Shall weshake hands?” (You can touch the personon the shoulder as a greeting if they cannotshake hands.) Don’t mention or ask aboutthe disability unless it’s relevant to theconversation or the person with thedisability refers to it. Be patient,especially when someone has a speechdisability. Never pretend to understandsomeone. Ask the person to repeatsomething, or offer a pen and paper towrite down the information. It’scompletely fine to offer assistance tosomeone with a disability in a dignifiedmanner, but don’t begin assisting unless itis first accepted.

Note card #2: Intellectual disabilities(also known as cognitive disabilities)

When meeting someone with anintellectual disability, be patient. Taketime to allow the person to put his or her

thoughts into words. Speak in simple termsand precise language. Don’t use baby talk.Ask direct questions. Verify a response byrepeating the information. People withintellectual disabilities may say “yes” to aquestion they don’t understand to please theperson, so make sure the other person reallyunderstands the question. Give clearinstructions and don’t give too manyinstructions at once.

Note card #3: Mobility limitations

Don’t touch a person’s mobility equipment orassistive devices (they’re part of his or herpersonal space). Don’t kneel to talk tosomeone in a wheelchair, but rather, standback a couple of steps so the person doesn’thave to strain his or her neck to speak to you.Sit in a chair if at all possible, especially if theconversation will be long. When givingdirections to a place, first consider if there areany mobility limitations such as stairs, hills, orcurbs without curb cuts. When going to aplace together, such as a restaurant, find out inadvance if the building is accessible.

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4Note card #4: Hearingimpairments

To get the attention of a person who isdeaf or has a hearing impairment,establish eye contact, tap the person onthe shoulder or wave your hand gently.Indicate to the person if you know signlanguage or find out if he or she wouldprefer writing notes or lip reading. Keepyour voice at a normal level and, if theperson is lip reading, make sure you’renot doing anything distracting such aschewing gum or putting your hands infront of your face. Maintain eye contactwith the person who has a hearingimpairment, even if he or she is using aninterpreter.

Note card #5: Visual impairments

Identify yourself when you greet a personwith a visual impairment. Let the personknow who else is present by identifyingor introducing each person. When youleave, excuse yourself and let the personknow when you return. When guiding aperson with a visual impairment, allowhim or her to take your arm at or aboutthe elbow and walk slightly ahead. Point

out any physical obstacles. Be specificwhen describing the location of objects,using an imaginary clock to point thingsout. For example: “There is a parked carat 4 o’clock and two steps up at 12o’clock.” Don't pet or distract a guidedog unless the owner says it is offduty and allowed to be petted. The dog isworking to ensure its owner’s safety andshould not be distracted.

Share what happened

❃ Why is it important to use properetiquette when interacting with peoplewith disabilities?

❃ How would you feel if you had adisability and someone used improperetiquette with you?

❃ How will you treat a person with adisability in the future?

w w w . n c c d d . o r gNorth Carolina Council on Developmental Disabilities

North Carolina Council onDevelopmental Disabilities

3125 Poplarwood Court

Suite 200

Raleigh, NC 27604

(919) 850-2901 TTY/Voice

Toll Free (800) 357-6916 TTY/Voice

Fax (919) 850-2915

Web www.nccdd.org

Robert J. “Bob” Rickelman, Ph.D., Chairman

Holly Riddle, J.D., M.Ed., Executive Director

This document was prepared and printed

by the North Carolina Council on

Developmental Disabilities through the

Developmental Disabilities Act of 1990,

Public Law 101-496. Twenty-five

hundred copies of this public document

were printed at a cost of $.44 per copy.

Ask for our People First booklets for teensand adults.

If you liked this guide, have suggestions or need more copies in English or Spanish, drop us a line at the info@nccdd.org.

K-5

People F irst