foundations of team leadership 6b-1 foundations of team leadership active listening one advantage of...

Foundations of Team Leadership

6b-1


Active Listening

One advantage of talking to yourself is that you know that at least one person is listening

…Anonymous


Communications Challenges

• One advantage of talking to yourself is that you know that at least one person is listening

…Anonymous


6b-3

Highest of Respect

Receptive Body Stance

Effective Questions

Par

aphr

asin

g SilenceAttentive Listening

Clarific

ation


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Active Listening Is•Disciplined

•Focused

•Active

•But what if we had to listen to collect a $million prize?

Active Listening Is Hard Work-

Clients have been heard to say that Bank Staff is arrogant…. Poor listening skills?


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What Is Required for Active Listening?• Ears– Alert so as to grasps the sender’s words &

intentions

• Eyes – Focusing & defocusing one’s gaze as culturally appropriate

• Mouth – Mostly silent-Resisting the need to deliver one’s opinion or show off one’s expertise

• Body- Reflecting the speaker’s body position to better assume an empathetic posture and cultural sensitivity

• Brain – Quietening the chatter-Stopping the tendency to develop one’s counter argument- Keeping the mind from drifting

• Heart – Willingness to listen- Extending the highest mark of respect to another


Sending speaker clues about your undivided attention:•Head-nodding

• To draw out additional information

•Body Language• To reflect the speaker’s body language in your own body’s

position• Leaning forward to show interest- maintaining eye exchange

where appropriate

•Short prompting actions or statements • Huh-huh…Go on…

•Silence• To provide the speaker with time to reflect …

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Summary Active Listening Non Verbal Tools


• No interruptions • Listening with whole being • Non-verbal eliciting signals (nods,

appropriate eye contact)

• Open/mirroring body posture• Non –verbal or very short prompts

(Go on, huh-huh)

Practice of Silent Tools

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Active Listening Pairing for Exercise#1

1. Pair with someone you not worked with so far..

2. Two roles:“A” = will share their ‘business’ or challenge“B” = will practice active listening skills.

Time: 3 minutes for the first round (A tells B about situation) Switch roles- same rules 3 minutes for the second round (B tells A about situation)

.

3. What did it feel like… Being Listened to? …ONLY Listening ?

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It Is the Highest Form of

Respect One Can Pay Anyone


Clarification

Clarifying• Getting more information in order to better

understand• Asking for it to be repeated or probing more

deeply

• Sample language:• ‘I am sorry for interrupting but did you say …? • Could you explain a little more…?’

NOTE: It is always permissible to interrupt for clarification-These questions indicate that one is paying attention


Paraphrasing

Paraphrasing • Summarizing and reflecting back

to Speaker what they are saying (important points) but in your own words

• Sample language• Let me summarize so I am sure I

understand everything…• If I heard you correctly, you are

saying…

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• Helps listener grasp message more accurately

• Helps the speaker feel listened to

• Promotes a better basis upon which to come to mutual understanding

•NOTE: Paraphrasing in a TEAM situation is stating the consensus that seems to be developing OR asking for clarification about stage in the conversation


• Support &appreciate, but be genuine…• “That’s quite a feat”

• Reflect empathy • “That must have been

difficult”

• Be discipline- Do not give in to impatience or distraction• Your speaker should have

all of your attention

Rapport-Building Statements

6b-11


Supporting Speaker through Correct Use of Questioning

Source: L Carry Workshop

.

Closed Questions-Hard InquiryDo you have a Pet?Is It a ….Does it ….Are you

going to…?

Open Ended Questions- Informative Inquiry

Tell me about your Pet….Why does it make you so

happy…

Differences in Approach?How it feels…How much is

surfaced?

When to Use Open Ended versus Closed Questions


Silent Listening Tools & Non-Verbal Signals

Sending speaker clues about your disciplined interest: Rapport Building (genuine appreciation or empathy)

• Oh my- that is very impressive…That must have been hard…

Clarifying• I am sorry for interrupting but did you say …Could you explain a

little more…?’

Paraphrasing• Let me summarize so I am sure I understand everything…• If I heard you correctly, you are saying…

Asking the Right Kind of Questions• Open Ended versus Closed Questions

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Summary Active Listening Verbal Guidelines


Practice of Verbal Tools

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Listening Actively and Engaging in:

Rapport-building Statements Clarification Questions Paraphrasing Open Ended Questions


Active Listening Pairing for Exercise #21. Pair with same person you did exercise #1 with.

.

2. Two roles:“A” = will share what they have been thinking of doing about their situation“B” = will practice active verbal listening skills.

Time: 3 minutes for the first round (A tells B about situation) Switch roles- same rules 3 minutes for the second round (B tells A about situation)

.

3. What did it feel like… Did a better platform of understanding evolve form which to better understand and …make suggestions…share experiences…offer insights?

6b-15

It Is the Highest Form of

Consulting One can Practice


First Rules of Consultative Interaction: •Listen, listen, listen…

Guidelines First Seek to Understand•Listen (With all of body senses & keeping mind quiet & focused) •Check your understanding of what is being said…•Try to see issue from speaker’s perspective (open mind)• Refrain from trying to solve client’s problem (too quickly)Stay Engaged •Clarify to make sure you are understanding correctly•Paraphrase•Listen empathically (genuine rapport building)•Ask open ended questions to elicit more disclosure

Purpose: Open Communications From Which to Build an Effective Client Relationship

Active Listening in Professional Consulting

Open FTL

Leadership andOrganizational Effectiveness

Effective Listening Guidelines & Exercise

6b-17


Actions? NA?

Specific Comments Why Effective or Not?

Effectively used short prompts

Used silences/pauses effectively

Used Body Language well

Made rapport-building statements (reflect/verbalize feelings)

Paraphrased what was being said

Clarified- To seek new information and/or perspective

Asked Open Ended Questions

Asked Open Ended Questions

ROLE PLAY- 2 RoundsRole ‘A’ Person speaking. Person A will inform Person B on how well they listen

Role “B” Person B listens to speaker A relate a story & monitors their own attentiveness

6b-18

foundations of team leadership 6b-1 foundations of team leadership active listening one advantage of...

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