from bitches to ugly: the power of words and gender

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Daniya Mozaffar Mrs. Martin English 110 5 th November 5, 2014 From Bitches to Ugly: The Power of Words and Gender I learned as a young child that the “B” word was not something to be spoken. A word that would have bad consequences for me I said it. When I was 13, I learned what the “B” word was and meant. I still remember how I turned bright red when my best friend Dania told me what it was in 2 nd block Algebra. For the longest time, I would be ashamed when my friends would say the “B” word. Not because they said it, but because I heard it. Because I was somehow a part of their conversation, and that was almost a sin in my little 13-year-old’s book. But then suddenly, the “B” word became bitch. To be honest, I don’t remember when that really happened. Sometimes I try to pinpoint when the change

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Daniya MozaffarMrs. MartinEnglish 1105th November 5, 2014From Bitches to Ugly: The Power of Words and GenderI learned as a young child that the B word was not something to be spoken. A word that would have bad consequences for me I said it. When I was 13, I learned what the B word was and meant. I still remember how I turned bright red when my best friend Dania told me what it was in 2nd block Algebra. For the longest time, I would be ashamed when my friends would say the B word. Not because they said it, but because I heard it. Because I was somehow a part of their conversation, and that was almost a sin in my little 13-year-olds book. But then suddenly, the B word became bitch. To be honest, I dont remember when that really happened. Sometimes I try to pinpoint when the change occurred, but it usually ends up with me mentally starting to sing Anaconda by Nicki Minaj. Its almost as hard as trying to remember when I learned how to tie my shoes, or learned to drink milk out of my bowl after finishing my cereal without the milk dripping like a broken faucet down my face. It came naturally. I find it almost hilarious that the word that I once considered the worst thing that could be ever said, to now be a part of my daily life. I have no sense of guilt right now as I type bitch onto this essay. I dont find being called bitch much of an offense. I also listen to songs that have bitch as a repeated lyric without any sense of remorse. Swearing and profanity have become a great influence in my life. It affects how I react to situations. Believe me when I say that if you make me mad, bitch or douche are probably the first words to come out of my mouth before I bad mouth you. Why is that? Why is profanity suddenly so common? What happened to the power of these words?The science behind swearing is simple; as you grow your brain develops. As Margret Semrud-Clikeman explains in her article Research in Brain Function and Learning: the more development of the brain, the easier it is to learn harder and harder concepts (Semrud-Clikeman). According to the Reseasrch done by the National Institute of Health: The brain does not fully develop until the age of 25, with adolescence being the prime time for brain development. This is most likely why swearing is more prominent in teenage years as your brain is developed enough to understand the context of swear words, just not developed enough to make good choices (qtd. In Rollins). The science of swearing is just a game of age and development. The psychology behind swearing is a different game; its a game of power. Emily Sohn explains in her article Why do People Swear? that swear words, or curse words have a sense of power on them just by being a taboo. The more you restrict something, the more power it has (Sohn). It's like telling a child that they can't eat a cookie, only to find them a few minutes later trying to sneak a cookie out of the cookie jar. The excitement of saying the word comes from knowing how you're doing something bad. In Jean Kilbourne Essay Two Ways a Woman Can Get Hurt", there is an advertisement shown of a skateboard company called "Bitch Skateboards". On the advertisement was a man holding a gun to the head of a woman (Kilbourne 428). In defense to the profanity of the advertisement, Sal Rocco Jr, the founder of the company argued in an interview with The Los Angeles Times that "violence is everywhere" and that "the kids today are punks...They tag and smoke weed and drink and most of them get prostitutes...It's like a college initiation. (Ferrell) The sad reality is, that its true. As Dr. Carl Pickhardt greatly discusses in his article Surviving (Your Childs) Adolescence: Adolescents are always willing to take risks and try something new (Pickhardt), which is why it only makes sense that they have risky behaviors. This is especially true for men, as Dr, Nigel Barber realizes in his article The Human Beast, who are more likely to fight back in an argument with a peer, while woman are more likely to stay away from risky behaviors (Barber). Dr. Goal Auzeen Saedi takes this farther in her article Millennial Media", where she explains how swearing itself follows the same patterns, with college aged students swearing the most, with both genders swearing fairly equally (Saedi). While both genders may swear in a fairly consistent manner, they both have very different reasons. Currently on iTunes top 100, there are 16 explicit songs, three in the top 36. All of the profane songs are rap. 12 of the 16 songs are rapped by men. In Joan Morgans piece From Fly-Girls to Bitches and Hoes one of the points she makes is that one of the most prominent reasons for profanity in rap, is because it is the way for men to regain power they have lost (Morgan 447). In a research done by The Bureau of Labor Statistics, currently in the United States 10.4 million men do not have a job (qtd. In Wessel). As Richard Whitmire and Susan McGee Bailey explain in their article The Gender Gap: 60% of college students are females, leaving only 40% of men (Whitmire, Bailey). The general dominance of men has greatly decreased in the last few years. For men, it is harder and harder to be the stereotyped dominant figure. Michael Kimmels piece Bros Before Hos: The Guy Code describes that society has classified men as the powerful, to be the lead, not to be like woman. Men must not have a venerable side (Kimmel 609). Not only that, the media shows that men are always the dominant, and should never take no for an answer (Kilborne 421). Swearing can also degrade men. This is shown in Carmen Vazquezs piece Appearances, when she talks of the Mickey who is repeatedly called faggot by a man who believed him to be gay. Because Mickey did not fit the norms (looking feminine) he was pushed down with cursing (Vazquez 473). This is, again to degrade the other person, to raise themselves. Profanity in men is primarily to gain power, which is one of the reasons it has become so common. Woman clearly swear as well, but not exactly for the same reasons. Link to Video: http://www.fastcocreate.com/3037453/watch-little-girls-dropping-f-bombs-for-equalityand-a-t-shirt-brand

Recently an activist company called FCKH8 created a video where little girls swore to get their point across; that some words are more hurtful than fuck. While profanity can easily be offensive, it can be just as powerful when used that way. Profanity has become so common because there are words and phrases more powerful, especially towards woman. Calling a woman fat, will defiantly hurt more than calling her a bitch. In Maysan Haydars piece Veiled Intentions; Dont Judge a Muslim Girl by her Covering, she discusses how woman are obsessed with being perfect, or at least what society deems as perfect (Haydar 404). What we deem perfect is greatly influenced by media The media doesnt say that being called a slut is bad thing, but rather says that not being called perfect is. Which is why profanity has become almost a compliment for woman. As Kilbourne argues, woman are shown through multiple sources of entertainment that acting provocative is the only way to get a man (Kilbourne 425). In the four songs on the top 100 of iTunes which are sung by woman, all have something to do with the encouragement of sexual acts as a way of getting a man. For example, in the song Only, Nicki Minaj raps lyrics such as let 'em eat my ass like a cupcake and Fuck with them real niggas. The glorification of provocative acts has led to the words usually associated with such acts to lose their meaning. Words such as slut, whore, and bitch dont mean anything they use to be because we hear them every day, all the time. Profanity for woman means nothing because it has lost the power that was once associating with it. While researching profanity and gender, one idea that constantly kept coming back was power. Teenagers swear to feel the power of freedom, men swear to regain power they have lost, and woman swear because the power of those words are gone. This essay itself is about power on words. Each and every one of us are in some sort of power struggle, whether it be eternally or externally. Do this, do that, change this, change that, choose this, choose that; deciding itself is a battle. In a world where gender is classified by a box full of unreachable goals, all we really have are these small forms of power. To watch TV instead of reading, to cut our hair short instead of keeping it long, to choose to say profane words. Has profanity increased? I believe it has. I believe we swear because it is one of the forms we gain some sense of control in our lives that is dictated by the unrealistic views of society. After being patronized and tortured over my body and how I look, I have found the freedom to choose to swear one of the ways I gain the self-esteem I lost during my middle school years. Words are so much more powerful than we can ever imagine, and gender is just one of the few places that it touches. Words are the most powerful form of rebellion we own. It is the strongest weapon we carry in our arsenal. Words are the toughest shield we have. Words are powerful.

Works CitedBarber, Nigel, Dr. "The Human Beast." Psychology Today: Health, Help, Happiness + Find a Therapist. N.p., 20 July 2012. Web. 18 Nov. 2014.Ferrell, David. "Skateboard Pros: Life on the Edge." Los Angeles Times. Los Angeles Times, 06 Mar. 1994. Web. 18 Nov. 2014.Haydar, Maysan. "Veiled Intentions; Dont Judge a Muslim Girl by Her Covering." Rereading America: Cultural Contexts for Critical Thinking and Writing. Comp. Gary Colombo, Robert Cullen, and Bonnie Lisle. Boston: Bedford of St. Martin's, 1995. N. pag. Print.Kilbourne, Jean. "Two Ways a Woman Can Get Hurt." Rereading America: Cultural Contexts for Critical Thinking and Writing. Comp. Gary Colombo, Robert Cullen, and Bonnie Lisle. Boston: Bedford of St. Martin's, 1995. N. pag. Print.Kimmel, Michael. "Bros Before Hos: The Guy Code." Rereading America: Cultural Contexts for Critical Thinking and Writing. Comp. Gary Colombo, Robert Cullen, and Bonnie Lisle. Boston: Bedford of St. Martin's, 1995. N. pag. Print.Minaj, Nicki, Chris Brown, Drake, and Lil Wayne. By Onika Maraj, Aubrey Graham, Dwayne Carter, Chris Brown, Lukasz Gottwald, and Henry Walter. Only. Nicki Minaj. Dr. Luke, 2014. MP3.Morgan, Joan. "From Fly-Girls to Bitches and Hoes." Rereading America: Cultural Contexts for Critical Thinking and Writing. Comp. Gary Colombo, Robert Cullen, and Bonnie Lisle. Boston: Bedford of St. Martin's, 1995. N. pag. Print.Pickhardt, Carl, Dr. "Adolescence and Fearful Excitement." Psychology Today: Health, Help, Happiness + Find a Therapist. N.p., 25 Nov. 2013. Web. 18 Nov. 2014.Rollins, Kristen. "Brain Not Fully Developed until Age 25." N.p., n.d. Web. 16 Nov. 2014.Saedi, Goal Auzeen, Dr. "Millennial Media." Psychology Today: Health, Help, Happiness + Find a Therapist. N.p., 25 Feb. 2011. Web. 18 Nov. 2014.Semrud-Clikeman, Margaret. "Research in Brain Function and Learning." Http://www.apa.org. N.p., n.d. Web. 15 Nov. 2014.Sohn, Emily. "Why Do People Swear? : DNews." DNews. Discovery, n.d. Web. 18 Nov. 2014.Wessel, David. "America Isn't Working: More than One in Six Men Between 25 and 54 Is Without a Job." The Brookings Institution. N.p., 6 Feb. 2014. Web. 18 Nov. 2014.