Funny Short Stories

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<p>Funny short storiesby STEPHEN on APRIL 27, 2012 300 CO MMENTS in FUNNY J OK ES , SHO RT STO RIES</p> <p>The child and his mother:A curious child asked his mother: Mommy, why are some of your hairs turning grey? The mother tried to use this occasion to teach her child: It is because of you, dear. Every bad action of yours will turn one of my hairs grey! The child replied innocently: Now I know why grandmother has only grey hairs on her head.</p> <p>Wrong email address:A couple going on vacation but his wife was on a business trip so he went to the destination first and his wife would meet him the next day.</p> <p>When he reached his hotel, he decided to send his wife a quick email. Unfortunately, when typing her address, he mistyped a letter and his note was directed instead to an elderly preachers wife whose husband had passed away only the day before. When the grieving widow checked her email, she took one look at the monitor, let out a piercing scream, and fell to the floor in a dead faint. At the sound, her family rushed into the room and saw this note on the screen: Dearest Just got checked in. Everything prepared for your arrival tomorrow. P.S. Sure is hot down here. Wife,</p> <p>Wills experience at the airport:</p> <p>After his return from Rome, Will couldnt find his luggage in the airport baggage area. He went to the lost luggage office and told the woman there that his bags hadnt shown up on the carousel. She smiled and told him not to worry because they were trained professionals and he was in good hands. Then she asked Will, Has your plane arrived yet?</p> <p>Clever kids:A police officer found a perfect hiding place for watching for speeding motorists. One day, the officer was amazed when everyone was under the speed limit, so he investigated and found the problem. A 10 years old boy was standing on the side of the road with a huge hand painted sign which said Radar Trap Ahead.</p> <p>A little more investigative work led the officer to the boys accomplice: another boy about 100 yards beyond the radar trap with a sign reading TIPS and a bucket at his feet full of change.</p> <p>Do you know any short but very funny stories? Please share belowSocial Sharing:</p> <p>Facebook1K+ Delicious Reddit Digg Tumblr</p> <p>LinkedIn StumbleUpon Twitter57 Email Google +1</p> <p>If you find this story useful, please share with a friend!</p> <p>Additional Reading... </p> <p>Give time to our family The mouse trap Military Story: True Friend Be Content About Your Life My mom only had one eye</p> <p>{ 300 comments read them below or add one }NEXT COMMENTS </p> <p>1.An Economist April 28, 2012 at 12:28 am</p> <p>Funny storiesthanks!!2.Anonymous April 30, 2012 at 3:58 am</p> <p>hahaha funny stories..3.Tirupathi April 30, 2012 at 9:04 am</p> <p>It was very funny and I will share with everyone.4.Rence May 1, 2012 at 5:44 pm</p> <p>Hahahaha great! Surely its funny5.Stephen May 2, 2012 at 3:22 pm</p> <p>A funny story involving a cop and two ladies: There was this car that was driving very slowly down the highway. A state trooper pulled it over. What did I do wrong, officer? the driver asked.</p> <p>You were going 26 MPH on a major highway, there is a law against that. You must go at least 50 MPH. But when I got onto the highway, the sign said 26! That is because this is Interstate 26! The 26 isnt the speed limit! The driver leaned back into her car seat and the cop saw another woman sitting beside her, she looked as pale as a ghost.</p> <p>What happened to her? the officer asked. I dont know, but she has been that way ever since we got off the interstate 160.6.Stephen May 2, 2012 at 3:33 pm</p> <p>A man carrying two huge suitcases to meet with a circus boss to apply for a job. The boss asked: What do you know?</p> <p>The man took out some big stones from one of the suitcases, threw the stones high in the air and used his head to catch the stones. The boss nodded. Great. What is in the other suitcase? Painkiller!7.Stephen May 3, 2012 at 10:35 am</p> <p>How much does it cost to get married? A little boy asked his father: Daddy, how much does it cost to get married? The father replied: I dont know son, Im still paying.8.Stephen May 3, 2012 at 12:16 pm</p> <p>A college student is deeply in love with his classmate but he doesnt know what to do to get the girls attention. One day, he came to ask the girl for help with his assignments and the girl agreed. Happily, he came to sit next to the girl the next day and took out a book pretending to read. After a little while, the girl asked: You must be a genius. How can you read a book upside down?9.Zillu May 4, 2012 at 11:38 am</p> <p>Awesome10.Aryan May 5, 2012 at 4:15 am</p> <p>The officer thought that he was clever11.Pratham May 13, 2012 at 6:28 am</p> <p>good story</p> <p>It was wonderful. Thanks12.Pratham May 13, 2012 at 6:33 am</p> <p>HAHAHAHA! Thank you very much.13.Klea June 1, 2012 at 1:53 am</p> <p>The teacher asks Jimmy: Teacher: Jimmy: pencil; he Jimmy, I doesnt have why dont a pencil; arent has we dont you a have a writing? pencil. pencil.</p> <p>Teacher: Jimmy, thats not a correct sentence. The correct way is: I dont have a Jimmy: Who stole all the pencils then?</p> <p>14.Mlungisi June 2, 2012 at 1:36 pm</p> <p>I like these stories, they keep me laughing and happy as i share</p> <p>15.Havemore Nyambe June 4, 2012 at 6:24 pm</p> <p>Super jokes. They make my world go round. Keep this up always.16.Hendra June 4, 2012 at 11:46 pm</p> <p>BIG LOL17.Stephen June 11, 2012 at 4:56 pm</p> <p>Two young boys conversation: Johnny: What makes the baby at your house cry so much, Tommy?</p> <p>Tommy: If all your teeth were out, your hair off, and your legs so week you couldnt stand on them, I guess youd feel like crying yourself. 18.Stephen June 11, 2012 at 5:03 pm Teacher: Let me hear how far you can count.</p> <p>Eugene: One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, jack, queen, king.19.Stephen June 11, 2012 at 5:10 pm</p> <p>Teacher:</p> <p>I</p> <p>hope</p> <p>I</p> <p>didnt</p> <p>see</p> <p>you</p> <p>looking</p> <p>at</p> <p>Freds</p> <p>book,</p> <p>Tommy.</p> <p>Tommy: I hope you didnt, too, sir.20.Liliana June 12, 2012 at 2:49 pm</p> <p>Bobby practicing karate on a dummy (a life-size doll):</p> <p>Bobby: Bobby: Dummy: Ow</p> <p>Lets Ow Whos</p> <p>begin! Ow I the</p> <p>shouted kicked the</p> <p>Bobby wall dummy</p> <p>HA instead! now!</p> <p>21.Lulunatic June 13, 2012 at 7:54 am</p> <p>3 men died and went up to heaven. The guy at the gate said The better you were to your wife, the better kind of car youll get. The first guy was very loyal to his wife and got a Ferrari. The second man fought with his wife so he got a broken down car. The last guy cheated on his wife dozens of times so he got a scooter. One day the guy on the scooter saw the guy in the Ferrari crying. He asked him, Why are you crying?</p> <p>He answered, I just saw my wife on roller skates.22.Ally rose June 19, 2012 at 11:26 am</p> <p>I loved the wrong email one. I think it was the best but I also liked the first23.Buffon June 20, 2012 at 5:38 am</p> <p>At night, a thief came in and stole a madmans tv and dvd. On geting out of d house, d madman wakeup and chase d thief. Afta 2 hrs race, d thief gave up, he start pleading but d madman replied ~Dont worry, i wanted to give you d remotes~24.Buffon June 20, 2012 at 5:50 am</p> <p>A drunkard stammers out of a bar and ran into 2 priests. He ran up to dem and says, ~ Im Jesus Christ~. The priests reply ~No son, you are not.~ The drunk says, ~Look, i can prove it~ and walk back into d bar with d priests. The bartender takes a look at d drunk and exclaim, ~Jesuse Christ, you are here again?~25.Antara June 21, 2012 at 7:01 am</p> <p>Cool website. Keep up the good work.26.Saul Samson June 23, 2012 at 12:43 pm</p> <p>Wow, am sick but you are making me happy.27.Lois Caminade June 24, 2012 at 3:47 pm</p> <p>I like the drunk guy and priest one and the teacher and Jimmy but I like the clever kids story the best28.Ken wa Nyabuto June 25, 2012 at 4:35 am</p> <p>Woh!!..the funny stories are xo hilarious. Keep up &amp; thanks.29.Sexyjane June 26, 2012 at 3:30 am</p> <p>So funny30.Nhiebu tsrho June 28, 2012 at 7:01 am</p> <p>Realy lyk it.:)</p> <p>31.Aakriti June 28, 2012 at 8:38 am</p> <p>Very humourous! Thnx a BUNCH!!!32.Tujebway July 4, 2012 at 10:17 am</p> <p>I like the Jimmy and Tommys, and the wife on trip. Ha ha haaa!.33.Pradnya Oberoi July 15, 2012 at 1:21 pm</p> <p>Very nice34.LalaLucy July 22, 2012 at 12:33 pm</p> <p>Mia, Cathy, Edward, David and John all decided to go for a walk in the jungle one day. Upon their stroll, they came across a pit of quick sand. It was way too long to jump over, and much too wide to go around. It had already taken them an hour to get this far, and none of them wanted to turn back. What are we going to do? asked Cathy. Just as she finished her sentene, a genie appeared. Dont worry, he said. You can all walk across the quick sand without sinking, as long as youre not gay. So, first Mia went across, and she didnt sink. Then Edward walked across, and he didnt sink. Then Cathy walked across, and she didnt sink. The three of them then looked back to find Johns neck deep in the quick sand. John, youre gay? asked Mia.</p> <p>No, he stated David is holding onto my pants!35.Ayman July 24, 2012 at 10:59 pm</p> <p>There was a couple sleeping. The wife had a bad dream, she woke up scared and cried. Her husband comforted her and asked why she cried, she replied: I had a dream that a very rich and handsome man kidnapped me from you.</p> <p>Husband: It is ok honey, it was just a dream. Wife responded loudly: That is why Im crying.36.Ljeoma July 26, 2012 at 6:41 am</p> <p>Nice one there37.Almansor July 27, 2012 at 3:31 am</p> <p>Great keep up the good work.38.Babi July 29, 2012 at 4:53 am</p> <p>haha funny good39.Tripulee August 3, 2012 at 1:31 am</p> <p>Two blondes were going to Disneyland when they met a sign that said: Disneyland left. So they started crying and went back home.40.Shaqe August 3, 2012 at 4:16 am</p> <p>Hahahaso funny stories tnx41.Aakira August 6, 2012 at 3:27 pm</p> <p>Super like42.Vicky August 7, 2012 at 5:02 pm</p> <p>It is very nice and funny43.Seth Tha Bom August 8, 2012 at 7:48 pm</p> <p>Funny much.44.Shiqran August 10, 2012 at 1:24 am</p> <p>I enjoyed this website very much.45.Salinda from sri lanka August 10, 2012 at 2:38 pm</p> <p>Here are my favorites: There was a couplethe lady was very talkative and she kept talking with people on the phone hour after hour when she is alone at home.</p> <p>End of everymonth they used to get a massive telephone bill and the husband was so worried on this. One day they were dining at the table and the phone rang.. The ladys reaction was immediateshe ran to the phone and started chatting.. After about 30-min she hang up and came back to the table.</p> <p>The husband was happy that she hang up in 30 min which was a good sign where she normally doesnt hung up at least for 2-hours. So he happily inquiredwas she busy to hang up so early??? was a wrong number.. replied the lady..46.Hashinda August 14, 2012 at 12:51 pm</p> <p>Thanx, its beautiful and funny.47.Robinson August 15, 2012 at 1:09 pm</p> <p>I just love all the jokes here but so in love with the mad man joke.48.Nobody August 21, 2012 at 6:39 am</p> <p>Love these short stories! I have a teenage daughter and shes always browsing the web for something to get her entetained, seeing as she came out of a relationship. Im glad that I will tell her about this!49.Zubu August 26, 2012 at 5:44 pm</p> <p>Wow really funny, I like them thanks!50.Miriam (mimi) August 27, 2012 at 10:33 am</p> <p>These are so so funny, I just cant stop laughing. Thanks to all who participated to came up with this.51.Angel Tiara August 28, 2012 at 3:16 am</p> <p>Guys I fell off my bed laughing.</p> <p>52.Aha August 31, 2012 at 6:07 am</p> <p>All were very cool.53.NILO September 5, 2012 at 6:27 am</p> <p>FUNNY54.LOL September 10, 2012 at 2:41 am</p> <p>Alien invasion. Tom: OMG. the staffroom has been invaded by these horrendoou creatures. Megan: Tom: You mean Yes-these more horrendous carry than the last bunch? slips.</p> <p>detention</p> <p>Megan: Mo wonder.55.AAHA September 10, 2012 at 3:41 am</p> <p>Wow lol, it is a very funny, great website. Keep up the good work!!56.Real Man September 12, 2012 at 10:20 am</p> <p>Want to hear a joke? Womens Rights! Did you hear about the woman who got hit by a car? My question is, how did the car get into the kitchen? How do you fix a womans watch? You dont, theres a clock on the stove! Why are womens feet smaller than a mans? So they can stand close r to the sink! Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead! What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile!57.PRIYA September 12, 2012 at 1:20 pm</p> <p>I just love these jokes.58.Kenzy September 12, 2012 at 3:07 pm</p> <p>Cool jokes, keep up the creative work.</p> <p>59.Ka Vyrux September 14, 2012 at 2:10 am</p> <p>Indeed they are funny.60.Agawine September 16, 2012 at 1:36 pm</p> <p>Nice, very nice. I like funny stories. I like the madman and wrong email and also the 1st one. Thx.61.Anupa September 18, 2012 at 2:48 am</p> <p>Once a dumb man had to buy a hammer. He went to the shop and asked for the hammer by hitting on a table with his fist.</p> <p>Now a blind man had to buy a scissor. Think how will he get it from the shopkeeper? No guesses! If so remember that the blind man can speak62.Thimira September 21, 2012 at 4:19 am</p> <p>Nice work..very funnywill submit more in the future63.Thimira September 21, 2012 at 4:38 am</p> <p>One husand came home drunk in the night. He needed use the toilet as soon as he got to the house. Then he did it and went to sleep. Next day he woke up and went to his wife Husband: Darling, yesterday I felt something different when I was using the toilet. The door of the toilet has to be pulled. And also there was an autumatic light when I opened the door</p> <p>His wife thought for a while and went to check Wife: OMGnext time please check whether you are going to use the toilet or the refrigerator64.Rajkumar Singh September 23, 2012 at 4:01 am</p> <p>So nice funny stories, it makes to forget all the sadness. Thanks a lot.65.Matt September 24, 2012 at 11:22 am</p> <p>lol these are so funny. The leading hand santiser can kill up to 99.9 % or germs. Chuck Norris can kill 100% of what ever he wants lol66.Ols September 25, 2012 at 7:04 am</p> <p>Two bold headed guys were fighting over one comb67.Kanishka September 28, 2012 at 12:30 pm</p> <p>An 80-year old man walks into the doctors office for his regular check-up. The doctor says to him, Ahh, Ted, how are you feeling? Great, says the old man. I have an 18-year old wife, and shes pregnant with my child. The doctor gives a concerned look and says to Ted, Ted, let me tell you a story. See, I have this hunter friend and one early morning, he goes out hunting, but is in such a hurry that he grabs his umbrella instead of his gun. So, as he is hunting, he spots to the ground. What?! cries the old man. Why? thats impossible! Someone else must have shot the lion. Exactly! says the doctor.68.Dotty October 1, 2012 at 2:31 pm</p> <p>a</p> <p>lion. He aims at the lion with his umbrella and shoots at it. Bam! The lion falls dead</p> <p>Nice change of pace. I was just drifting around not really doi...</p>