gone forever

8/6/2019 Gone Forever

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I looked down at my son Damin as he sat eating

breakfast. I heard my sister come up behind me.

Hi Aunt Rose! Damin yelled, getting up to give her a

hug. She hugged him and he sat back down. She turned tome.

Hey Riley. You going to take him today? You said you

were on the day of his ninth birthday. She said. I nodded.

I just don't want to go by myself. I said and she

hugged me.

Do you want me to go with you? I nodded just asDamin announced that he was done eating. I set his plate in

the sink just as Rose took his hand.

Come on Damin, me and your mother have somewhere

that we want to take you.

Where? Where? He asked jumping up and down. I

kneeled down in front of him.

Do you want to meet your dad? I asked him and his

eyes got big. He nodded. He hugged me before he took

Rose's hand and followed her upstairs.

I slowly followed them upstairs and into my room. I

walked over to my dresser and pulled out a 5x7 ornate,

silver framed picture. I walked over to the bed and looked

at the picture. I was still looking at it when Rose came in

ten minutes later.

Riley, come on. You have to get dressed. She said and

I didnt look up. She walked over and took the picture from

me. She sat next to me.


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Riley Damin needs to know what happened to Caleb. I

felt my heart clench when she said his name. She hugged

me and I wiped at the few stray tears.

I got up and walked into Damin's room. He was sittingin the middle of the floor playing with dinosaurs. I took his

hand and we walked down the stairs to where Rose was

waiting.Hey Ri, I grabbed all the stuff that we'll need

She said and I nodded. We walked outside and

simultaneously climbed into Rose's car.

She pulled out of the driveway and we arrived at thecemetery fifteen minutes later. We got out of the car and

I took Damin's hand before rose began leading us through

the cemetery.

We finally stopped in front of a smaller gray

tombstone that read:

Here Lies

Caleb James

1990 2011

Loved Boyfriend,

Father, and Friend

I stepped back as Rose spread the neon orange blanket

out in front of the grave marker. I quietly sat down next

to Rose and pulled Damin down onto my lap.


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Damin I want you to meet your daddy. I said and he

looked confused.

What do you mean? He asked and Rose took his hand.

Hun, your daddy died. She said and he looked at me.Can I know what happened? He asked and I sighed

before I answered.

Me and Caleb thats his name met when we were in

high school. Well we started dating and he told me my

senior year that he wanted to join the Marines and I said

that he could if its what he really wanted to do. Well heleft for training and when he came back from that, I got

pregnant with you. Well he got deployed for eight months

and came back a week before you were born. Well we had

you, I pulled a picture out of my bag and handed it to him.

Well he was deployed again a month after you were born.

Well me and your Aunt Rose took care of you for four

months before I got a call that he had been killed in

action. I tried to reign in the flood of tears and Damin

hugged me.

Its okay mommy, you have me and Auntie Rose. He

said and I hugged him again. I reached into the bag and

pulled out a second picture.

This was one of the last pictures of us taken before

he left again. It was a picture of me and Caleb in the park

near our house. I was on his back and Rose and taken it

while we were laughing.

I pulled Caleb's purple jacket out next and set it in


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Damin's lap.

What's this?

That was your dad's favorite jacket. He always said

he was going to give it to his first son, And now you haveit. I said and he smiled at me before putting it on.

We sat and talked about Caleb for around an hour

before we packed up.

Bye baby. I said and I ran my hand across the top of

the tombstone.

Bye daddy! It was nice to meet you! Damin yelled ashe attempted to hug the tombstone. I smiled and took his

hand and we walked back to Rose's car and headed home.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

10 Years Later

I stood in front of my dresser and looked at the 8x10

picture on top of it. It was a picture of my father, who had

died almost four months after I was born.

It was his Marines picture, taken when he joined. I

looked at the pictures on either side of it. One was of the

day I was born, and the other, a picture of of my mom and

dad together one last time before he was shot.

I took a deep breath and walked downstairs and into


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the kitchen where my mother and Aunt Rose were standing

with my Asian uncle.

Hey Uncle Hyo. Hey Aunt Rose. I hugged my aunt and

my mom.Well me and Hyo were just leaving. Bye guys. I

hugged my aunt again as she walked out the front door. I

looked at my mom who was leaning against the kitchen

counter drinking coffee.

Hey mom can I talk to you? I asked.

Sure honey. She said walking over to the table andpulling out a chair for me before sitting next to me. Now

what's wrong Damin?

I sighed. I needed to just tell her. Mom, I want to

join the Marines. I said without looking at her. She didn't

say anything and after a quiet minute I heard her quiet,

shuddering sobs.

I turned to look at her and she had her face in her

hands and had let out the flood gate of tears.

"Mom," I said turning to her. I pulled her to me in a

hug and she cried against my shoulder. "Mom, if you don't

want me to go then I won't."

"No. Damin honey, I'm going to tell you the same thing

I told your dad. If this is something that you really want

to do, then don't let anyone else tell you otherwise." She

said and she hugged me again.

"Why are you crying then mom?"

"It just shocked me. I would have thought that that


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you would have decided against it, but it makes sense." I

hugged her again.

"I just don't know how Victoria will take it."

"Hun, Victoria has been your girlfriend for two years,she will understand." I nodded. "And I can help her take

care of Ceres." I nodded again, hugged her, and slowly

walked upstairs and laid in my room.

I wasnt sure if I wanted my mom to take care of

Ceres. I mean she's my daughter but my mom shouldn't

have to do that.I was deep in thought when my phone started ringing.

I slowly got up and checked the caller ID.

Victoria.

I flipped open the phone and hoped that she was in a

good mood.

Hello?

Hey Damin.

Hey Victoria. I said quietly and I knew she would

realized something was wrong.

So I was wondering if you would like to come see

Ceres today? I know you haven't seen her in a while and I

wanted to spend some time with you. She said, her voice

gradually getting smaller.

Um, yeah, sure. I'd love to come see you and Ceres.

I'll be over around three okay? I said, already looking

forward to seeing both of them.

Okay. I love you.


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Love you, too. Bye.

Bye.

I hung up the phone and laid back down. I slowly

drifted off into a restless sleep.

When I woke up again it was 2:30. I slowly rolled out

of bed and got dressed. I grabbed my car keys, my dad's

purple jacket, and hugged my mom before I got in my car

and drove towards her house.

I pulled into the driveway and Victoria walked out andhanded me Ceres before she gave me a kiss. I followed her

into the house and up to her room.

Ceres soon fell asleep and Victoria put her in her crib

and laid down with me in her bed.

Hey Victoria?

Hmmm?

I have something important to tell you. I said and

she turned to look at me in question.

What is it? You can tell me. She said when I didn't

answer right away.

"I'm joining the Marines." I said and she froze. She

sat up and looked at me.

"Why Damin? Why?" She asked as the silent but

deadly tears started to roll down her face. I pulled her to

my chest and she cried.

"I feel like my dad would have wanted me to." I said

and she sniffled. I hugged her and she held onto me


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tightly.

"What about Ceres? She can't grow up without a

father." She said and I nodded.

"In the beginning I will only have basic training. Andwe will just tell her the truth. My mom said she would help

take care of her." I said.

"Your mom isn't responsible for our daughter."

"But she loves her and you try telling my mother no." I

said with a laugh and after a second Victoria laughed too.

"If you really want to join the marines, then I willsupport you. She said looking up at me. I hugged her and

we laid there.

Eventually she feel asleep. I felt my phone vibrate in

my pocket and carefully got it out without waking her up.

"Hello?" I whispered.

"Hey honey. How did it go with Victoria?" My mom

asked quietly.

"I think it went good. She didn't have a fit and kick me

out." I said and I could hear the smile in her voice when

she spoke again.

"That's good to hear. Are you spending the night with

her?"

"I'm going to if I can." I said before I said bye and we

hung up. I put my phone in my pocket and laid my head

against Victoria's and fell asleep.

I was woken up the next morning when Victoria got up


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to check on a crying Ceres. She got her out of her crib and

took her downstairs. I followed quietly and helped make

her a bottle. She handed me Ceres and I sat on the couch

and fed her. When she was done she fell asleep in my arms.Victoria?

Hmm?

Are you and Ceres coming when I leave? I asked

looking at Ceres.

I know I am, but I can bring Ceres if you want me

too.Thanks. I said as she snuggled against my side.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Today was the day.

I carefully set a picture of me, Ceres and Victoria on

top of my bag and zipped it up. I grabbed a small, black

box and shoved it in my pocket before I picked up my bag

and made my way downstairs.

My mom was standing in the living room looking at a

picture of my father's smiling face. My Aunt Rose had told

me that my dad had been really depressed. Almost to the

point of suicide. But then he met my mother, and things

were a lot better for him. I put my hand on my mom's

shoulder and she turned to look at me.


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Oh honey. She hugged me and the tears started

rolling down her cheeks. You look so much like your father

in your uniform. She smiled and hugged me again.

Damin. I turned around and saw my Aunt Rosestanding there with Uncle Hyo behind her. For a second I

thought you were your dad. She said hugging me. Hyo put

his hand on my shoulder.

I never met your dad, but, be a great person like he

was. He said smiling at me. I hugged them all one last time

before I walked out to my car. I got in and turned towardsVictorias house.

When I pulled up she was sitting on the porch swing

holding a sleeping Ceres. We carefully got her in her car

seat, and started towards the base. I held her hand on the

way there.

Ceres woke up about half way there and looked around

the car confused. We got to the base and Victoria got her

out of the car while I got my bags out. We silently walked

into the base and I stopped in the middle of the floor.

"Did you wanna stop here or do you wanna watch the

plane take off?"

"I wanna be with you till the last possible minute." She

said. I nodded and we continued to walk till we arrived at a

plane that was in the process of boarding.

I dropped my bags and took Ceres from Victoria. I

bounced her in my arms and she giggled. I kissed her


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forehead and handed her back to Victoria. I kissed her lips

and she hugged me. I pulled out the box and handed it to

her. When she opened it a small gasp escaped her lips. It

was a heart shaped locket. On one side a picture of both ofus and on the other a picture of Ceres. I put it on her and

she hugged me again.

"I'll always love you Damin. Don't forget that." She

squeezed me tighter and I whispered in her ear.

"I will come back and be here for you and Ceres. I

promise. Even if it's the last thing I do." I kissed her andslowly boarded the plane. She stood there holding Ceres

and watched the plane taxi and take off.

I walked back to the car and slowly drove home. Trying

to see through the haze of tears. I knew Damin was going

to come home. I believed it with all my heart.

gone forever

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