Women's and Children's Health Network

Good manners Kids' Health Topic

What are good manners?

Courtesy, politeness or having good manners are all about respecting others and yourself.

How would you feel if someone:

talked to your friend but turned his back to you?

pushed you out of the way to get the seat you were about to sit on?

let the door slam in your face as you were about to walk through it?

shared your things but never shared anything of theirs?

never said 'please' or 'thank you'

didn't pass your phone message to your friend?

Good manners is about considering the feelings of other people, and being the kind of person that others will like and respect.

In the 'olden days' children were taught about the Golden Rule - "Always do to others as you would wish them to do to you if you were in their place."

This is still a good way to behave nowadays. If you are respectful to others, then you are

more likely to be treated with respect by them.

If you show good manners everywhere you go, then you are more likely to encourage others

to behave in the same way towards you.

Look at the following ideas from kids and see if you can think why they chose these examples of good manners.

What good manners look like at home

being helpful to others in your home

saying 'please' and 'thank you'

sharing and not grabbing and keeping good things to yourself

respecting other people's property and their rooms

helping the family by doing your chores

cleaning up after yourself.

Manners at school

saying good morning/afternoon if you are walking past an adult who you know

asking if you can borrow something, not just taking

returning things that you have borrowed

waiting your turn before you speak

saying 'excuse me,' rather than pushing past someone

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holding the door open for the person coming in, especially if he is carrying something

respecting your own and other people's property, especially school property

saying 'please' and 'thank you'.

When you are out

If you are out with other kids...

Respect other people.

Be polite to others.

Don't use bad language in public - it is offensive to others.

Let an older person have your seat on buses, trains and trams if there is nowhere for them to sit.

Queue up quietly and don't push.

Put your rubbish into bins, don't leave it for someone else to clean up.

Have fun but don't be so loud that you attract the wrong kind of attention.

Respect property.

Don't make fun of anyone - everyone has feelings.

Don't run in shopping centres or where there are other people.

If you are out with your parents or other adults...

Use your good manners so that you don't embarrass anyone.

Introduce any friends you meet to the people you are with.

Say 'please' and 'thank you'.

Don't be a 'canna'. ("canna have this?" and "canna have that?")

At the table

Use your knife to cut and your fork to put the food in your mouth.

Chew food with your mouth closed.

Ask for things to be passed to you, don't lean over the table.

If you need to blow your nose, excuse yourself and go out of the room first.

Don't grab everything you want first - help others to get their food and be prepared to share.

Don't talk with your mouth full. It is not a good look!

On the phone

If you have to answer the phone, there are 3 important things to remember:

1. Say your telephone number and who you are, eg. 'Jane speaking.'

2. Never say, "Mum/Dad, or any other adult you live with, is out". Say "----- can't come to the

phone right now - may I take a message?" You don't know whether the person on the

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other end of the phone is a would-be burglar, so you need to keep yourself safe. Don't

give out any other information. The caller doesn't need to know if mum is in the bathroom or whatever!

3. Always write down messages including phone numbers and organise with your family

where the messages are to be put, eg. by the phone or on the fridge. The person who gets the message can choose whether or not to phone back, but it is good manners to let them know that they have a message anyway.

When you are using a phone

Negotiate with your family for length of time on the phone so that one person doesn't use

the phone for hours, making it difficult for anyone else to use it. This is especially important if your internet access uses the same line.

If you have a mobile, don't text or call someone when you're with a friend unless you first ask if your friend minds.

If you get a call, say "excuse me" and move away from others to answer it, then make it a

quick call. (How would you feel if you were just standing around while your friend was chatting away?)

Dr Kim says

Having good manners makes you a pleasant person to be around.

OK, it may be fun to have a farting or burping competition with your mates, but pick your time and place so that others are not offended! You may have more relaxed manners at home, but

when you are outside or you have visitors it is up to you to give a good impression of yourself, your school, your sports team, your group and your family. Behaving badly doesn't just give a bad impression of yourself.

Anyway, how much more pleasant is life when people show that they respect the comfort, feelings and wellbeing of others?

Thank you for reading this.

Manners

Manners! Manners! Don't be rude be nice Manners will make your brain think twice! Chew with your mouth closed

Cover when you sneeze. Use your manners Around other people please.

In the shops, even at the beach Use them and people will think you're a peach.If it's sunny or raining

In the shops or at dinner Use your manners And you'll be a winner! BH