Handling Conflictin the Workplace

Introduction

Conflicts are an inevitable part of life. In work With your family With your friends

The way you handle these conflicts can have a major impact on your success, your happiness, and your fulfillment in life.

Let’s Get Started…

To get a sense of your current approach to conflict, try this self assessment.

For each statement, mark the response that best applies to you.

Don’t spend a long time pondering each answer. Just choose the answer that seems most appropriate right now.

Your Results…

Scoring key for conflict Management Questionnaire:

Write the scores circled for each item on the appropriate line below (statement numbers are in the brackets), add up each scale. Higher scores indicate that you are stronger on that conflict management style.

Conflict is …

The interaction of interdependent people who perceive incompatible goals and interference from each other in achieving those goals.

-Hoeker & Wilmot

What Is Conflict?

Conflict can build up over time, or it can flare up suddenly.

It can be based on genuine disagreements about the job, but it also can be fueled by many other things: Pressures that the individuals are feeling Frustrations Fears Personal dislikes, etc.

Conflict Defined

A conflict exists when one person’s attempt to reach his or her goals interferes with another person’s attempt to do the same.

Ex. Amber’s goal is to do her job well, and she sees her efforts being blocked by Frank. His goal may be to prevent his cherished way of

doing things from changing. Frank patronizes Amber; she threatens and calls

him a name.

Conflict

Of course, conflict doesn’t have to be so open or obvious.

Perhaps the nastiest conflict in organizations (and personal interactions) are the ones papered over by smiles and hearty greetings.

If you feel that someone who pretends to like you is really stabbing you in the back, you ARE in conflict.

Advantages of Conflict

Diffuse more serious conflicts Stimulate search for new facts or solutions Enhance relationships Increase cohesiveness

Conflict should be managed not eliminated

Disadvantages of Conflict

Time consuming Disrupts progress/ problem solving Detracts from job at hand Keeps people apart; if unresolved Poor quality, lowers productivity Reduces team effectiveness

Disagreement vs. Conflict

It’s important to realize that mere disagreement is not conflict.

Ex. Say that Brie Watters is advocating Plan A, and Dan Demenge is advocating Plan B.

At a company meeting you both present your arguments, the two of you disagree strongly, and maybe even yell at each other.

This isn’t necessarily conflict…why?

Types of Conflict

Intrapersonal Interpersonal

Intragroup Intergroup

Sources of conflict

Fear Dishonesty Boundaries Negligence Need to be right Miscommunication

Mishandling conflict in the past

Hidden agenda Revenge Fighting the “last

war”

Personality Traits That Promote Conflict

Are there some types of people who, by their very nature, rub others the wrong way? I.E. does their personality make them more prone

to conflict? Psychologists and organizational theorists

believe this to be true.

Characteristics That Promote Conflict

Authoritarian attitudes Arrogance Dogmatism-insistence on the truth of a belief

that cannot be proved Strong need to control things Fear of uncertainty; that is, wanting to be

absolutely sure about one’s beliefs, one’s prestige in the organization, etc.

Consequences of ConflictPeople who study organizations have described

many damages caused by conflict… Energy is diverted from important goals. Tasks that depend on cooperation don’t get

done properly. Both parties feel increased stress and

frustrations, which can effect job performance. The “losers” in a conflict often feel demeaned

or not respected, affecting commitment to the workplace.

Consequences of Conflict Often conflict spreads to other people, poisoning

many relationships. Morale declines, job satisfaction suffers, suspicion mounts, and absenteeism rises.

As hostilities escalate, some people may get fired; others may quit. In either case, turnover increases.

Clients/customers notice that something’s wrong in the organization and take their business elsewhere.

Is Conflict Always Bad? Let’s look at some ways in which conflict—if

handled properly—may actually benefit an organization.

As you’ve seen conflict involves competing goals, but sometimes it’s natural in any organization to have them.

Ex. A company research director wants to spend money to develop new products. The company’s controller, meanwhile, wants to hold down costs.

Since these goals contradict, this could lead to conflict.

Is Conflict Always Bad?

It’s clear the company should develop new products, and it should exercise some control over spending.

Clearly, in this case, the company needs to find a balance between these goals.

If some degree of conflict between the researcher and controller helps the company find the right balance, in essence the conflict was useful.

Conflict and Creativity Conflict can make competing individuals, and

those around them, think harder and more inventively.

It tends to increase both the number of ideas considered AND the originality of those ideas.

In our example… The research director may think of innovative

ways to design and test new products without spending a lot of money.

Meanwhile, the controller may be inspired by the conflict to find more ways to stretch the budget.

Other Benefits of Conflict Focusing of attention-specifically to problems that

need addressing. Stimulation of internal change-getting rid of outdated

procedures, etc. Personal growth-people may learn new things about

work, life, and relationships they can apply in the future.

Greater understanding of other employees. Excitement-life would be boring without it! Greater energy and initiative-excited workers produce

more.

One Last Benefit… You’ve often heard of the problems caused by

holding your feelings in. Strong negative emotions can fester if you suppress them.

Conflict gives you a chance to vent those feelings—to clear the air.

Of course, if you want to make things better than worse, you have to vent your feelings in the right way.

Constructive vs. Destructive Conflict

Beneficial conflicts are often called constructive conflicts.

Harmful conflicts are said to be destructive. The basic difference?

Good conflicts build up an organization’s strengths while bad conflicts tear things down.

Elements of Constructive Conflict

The problem is seen as a mutual problem. Neither party says, “I’m ok…YOU are the one with the

problem.” The parties pursue a “win-win” outcome, in which

both parties gain, rather than “win-lose.” Both people express their ideas openly and

communicate effectively. Each person takes the other person seriously and

treats him/her with respect.

Elements of Constructive Conflict

Both people feel they have been understood and accepted.

Both people feel they have influenced the outcome.

Both people are committed to the agreement they finally reach.

Relationships among the parties are strengthened by the process of finding a solution.

Conflict Management

The use of strategies and tactics to move parties toward resolution or at least containment of a dispute that avoids further escalation and relationship destruction.

-Aschenbrenner

Conflict Management

Identify critical information Whose problem is this? What is the situation? Issues, history, players, stake holders

What organizational factors are present? Policy/procedure, culture, working conditions What personal factors do I need to acknowledge? Personal issues, conflict resolution style, what pushes my

buttons

Conflict Management

Personal inventory What role does my behavior play in the dynamic? What situational elements am I willing/able to

change? What are my resource constraints? What matters to me --

winning? The relationship?, specific outcome?

Styles of Conflict Management

Avoidance: “You don’t have a dog in this fight” Cool down needed No chance for success Turn the other cheek Disadvantages

Missed opportunity to clarify issue Increases power differential Coward/pushover label Overused in healthcare

Competition

True zero sum game Time constraints “Opponent's” only style Disadvantages

Sets power wins pattern Increases power differential Not helpful in personal relationships No ownership in the solution

Accommodation

Issue more important to the other party Graceful exit strategy Value the relationship Competition getting no where Disadvantages

You are a fixer/enabler Doormat Increase power differential

Compromise

Issue and relationship important Need temporary or expedient “fix” Collaboration falters Disadvantages

Focus on position/solution not issues Lose-lose rather than win-win May miss a systems solution

Collaboration

Need to build support for implementation Addressing complex problems Change needed for the solution Allows focus on goals, issues, values

not positions or demands Disadvantages

Time consuming Both parties need to listen and learn Willingness to change Needs planning and team building

Communication Skills LISTEN, LISTEN, LISTEN Respect Cultivate trust Stay clear, concise, positive Recognize body language Use “I” statements not “you” statements (avoid blame) Articulate your needs Acknowledge others’ needs LISTEN, LISTEN, LISTEN

Checking Your Knowledge

On a sheet of paper, answer the following questions TRUE or FALSE.

1) For the good of the organization, employees and managers should try to avoid conflicts whenever possible.

2) Conflict is about opposing or mutually incompatible goals.

3) Even if people are behaving normally—not yelling and screaming—there may be significant conflict going on.

Checking Your Knowledge4) A loud argument is a clear sign of conflict.5) Dogmatic people are not likely to engage in

conflict.6) Even if you’re in the right, “winning” a

conflict is not necessarily good for the organization.

7) The right kind of conflict can make people more creative.

8) Conflicts always damage personal relationships.

Assessing My Knowledge of Conflict Management

1) For every winner in a conflict, there has to be loser.

2) Avoiding a conflict is never a good way to deal with it.

3) On important issues, compromise is not the best alternative.

4) Collaboration is the easiest way to resolve a conflict

5) Collaboration involves finding shared goals.

Assessing My Knowledge of Conflict Management

6) In a crunch, you shouldn’t be afraid to fight for what you believe in.

7) If someone is angry, there’s no point in talking with him or her.

8) It’s wrong to give up the fight because you’re worried about your relationship with the other person.

9) In order to collaborate successfully, you need to keep your emotions to yourself.

10) Conflict can end up strengthening the bond between two people.

Conclusion Psychologists have identified 5 basic conflict

management strategies: avoidance, accommodation, compromise, competition, and collaboration. Each has its own uses.

Collaboration takes the most time and energy, but it is the one true “win-win” strategy.

Collaboration depends on defining the problem clearly and looking for goals that both parties share.

Even if the other person is very angry, you can make progress toward resolving the conflict by keeping calm yourself, trying to focus attention on the real problem, and expressing your thoughts and feelings constructively.