happy family 2
TRANSCRIPT
Cross Cultural Definition of a Healthy and Happy Family健康和幸福家庭的文化内涵
Creating a Healthy and Happy Family
营造一个健康和幸福的家庭
The Healthy Family 健康家庭You can have你能够被信任
The Healthy Family 健康家庭You can manage你能够处理自己的情绪
The Healthy Family 健康家庭
You can give and receive你能够获得安慰和安慰别人
HEALTHY FAMILY SYSTEM 健康家庭的观念
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Significance ofValues
Positive Identity 积极肯定的自我观Performance 表现
Affection 关爱
价值观的重要性
重要性百分比
Profile of a Healthy Family健康家庭的概况
• Peaceful, safe environment• 平和安全的气氛• Words and emotions in harmony• 和睦的语言和情绪• Do not understand a hurting world sometimes 有时对充满伤害的世界不理解
Little Hope
有时能得到信任
Performance Only Family Issues只注重表现的家庭
Are Mismanaged
情绪经常处理不当
Performance Based Family Issues注重表现的家庭出现的问题
Performance-based Family
注重表现的家庭
Poor at Giving Comfort不善于给予安慰
Profile of a Performance Based Family注重表现的家庭的概况
• Affection 关爱• Conditional love 有条件的爱• Limited relational skills• 有限的交往技巧• Confusion from inconsistent messages• 传达的信息前后不一致，带来迷惑
Symptom of a Performance Based Family怎样是注重表现的家庭
Motivated By被这些心理所驱
使：
Love is earned (Performance
Driven)爱是赚取来的（靠表现）
Symptom of a Performance Based Family怎样是注重表现的家庭
Family Background Comparison 不同家庭观念的比
较
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Healthy健康 Performance-based
只注重表现
PositiveIdentity积极的身份Performance表现
Affection关爱
重要性百分比
Is only suspicion只有怀疑，没有信任
The Unhealthy Family Issues
不健康家庭的问题
The Unhealthy Family Issues
不健康家庭的问题
Are suppressed情绪被压抑
The Family Issues 家庭问题
Not Given没有安慰
Profile of an Unhealthy Family不健康家庭的概况
• Blind loyalty 信任被理解为盲目的忠诚• Unsafe & painful 又不安全又痛苦• Everything Opposite 看所有事情都黑白颠倒了• Have deep sympathy 对人有同情心• Most Compulsive 最无法自制
Symptom of an Unhealthy Family 怎样的家庭是不健康家庭
The family members will usually respond under adult stresses like they were still back in the home.家庭成员面对成年人的压力时，表现得就像小时候自己在家中一样。
Symptom of an Unhealthy Family 怎样的家庭是不健康家庭
Family Background Comparison 家庭环境比较
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健康家庭 不健康家庭
Positive Self-image 积极肯定的自我观Performance 表现
Affection 关爱
重要价值百分比
Creating a Healthy Family
营造一个健康的家庭
The Age of Emotions 情感成熟的年纪
Healthy Parents Model Skills健康的父母以榜样教导人际关系
SKILL OF GIVING AND RECEIVING AFFECTION如何给予和接受关爱的示范
Skill of Giving Comfort如何安慰人
• Comfort is life changing 安慰改变人的生命
• Comfort is not earned or deserved
安慰既不能赚得也不是本应该的
• Comfort Matches the child’s emotions (feels those emotions)
• 安慰就是同情感受他们的感受
More Skills更多技巧
• Experiencing and Managing Emotions
体验并处理情绪• Communication Skills
沟通的技巧• Conflict Resolution
矛盾的消转• Negotiation Skills
磋商和交涉的技巧
Identifying Unhealthy Symptoms
辨别不健康家庭环境的影响
IDENTIFYINGUNHEALTHY SYMPTOMS 辨别不健康家庭环境的影响
1. DEFENSES 防备人2. INTERNAL RESULTS 内心所受的影响3. RELATIONAL RESULTS Lack of Happiness Skills 人际关系所受的影响 缺乏快乐技巧
DEFENSES: SECLUSION防备人：隔离自守
Relational isolation in Childhood
童年时孤单无助“Arms Length” Adult Approach
成年后与人保持距离
OTHER DEFENSES其它防备人的措施
• Lying 说谎• Manipulation 操控别
人• Indirect
Communication• 说话转弯抹角
OTHER DEFENSES其它防备人的措施
Preoccupation埋头于人际关系以外的东西• Work, Grades 工作、学习成绩• Sex, TV, Violence 性、电视、暴力
OTHER DEFENSES其它防备人的措施
埋头其它 :• Gambling 赌博• Overeating 暴
食
OTHER DEFENSES其它防备人的措施
埋头其它：• Smoking 吸烟• Alcoholism 酗
酒• Drugs 吸毒
INTERNAL RESULTS内心所受的影响
SELF-BLAME自责
“SHAME”
轻看自己CREATION OF A
FALSE SELF产生了错误的自我看法
Picture Created Under Stress
外表还好，里面压力很大
OTHER INTERNAL RESULTS其它内心所受到的影响
REPRESSION OF EMOTION
压抑情感SUSPICION 多疑
RELATIONAL RESULTS人际关系所受到的影响
• LACK OF HAPPINESS SKILLS缺乏得到快乐的技巧
• POOR SKILLS AT EXPRESSING EMOTIONS
• 不善表达情感
RELATIONAL RESULTS人际关系上所受的影响
• POOR PROBLEM SOLVING SKILLS
• 不善于解决问题• “COMMUNICATION
SOLVES NOTHING” MENTALITY
• “ 沟通也无济于事”的心态