Social Health

• Identify skills that improve communication.• Illustrate the gender differences in communication.• Discuss the pros and cons of online social networks.• Recount why students may have physical and mental-

health benefits when involved in intimate relationships.• Discuss the science of love, including the

psychological, anthropological, and biochemical views.

• Identify characteristics of healthy and unhealthy relationships.

• Recall the issues that couples in long-term relationships may confront.

Chapter Learning Objectives

Social Health

Refers to the ability to interact effectively with

other people and with the social environment

Create Close Ties With Other People

• Supportive relationships protect people from stress, distress and

disease• A sense of belonging may have

the greatest impact on college students’ health

Your Social Network Affects Your Health

Social Contagion

Process in which friends, friends of friends, acquaintances and social circle affect health

Is it real?

Health factors change in clusters• Obesity in one person made friends 57% more likely to become obese • Smoking in one person made friends 35% more likely to start smoking

Two Skills That Will Improve Communication

1. Learn to Listen

Try to understand feelings and motivation

Ask questions when you don’t understand

Prompt person to continue talking

2. Be Agreeable, but Assertive

Make needs and desires clear

Use non-provocative words

See Strategies for Change, page 120

Men And Women Communicate Differently

Men

Talk to demonstrate superiority

Interrupt to get information

E-mails are brief and utilitarian

Online conversations more likely to include strong assertions, sarcasm and disagreement with others

Women

Talk to draw people closer

Likely to wait rather than interrupt

Writing uses more words related to emotion

E-mails are written similar to spoken word to build connection with audience

Men And Women Communicate Differently

Nonverbal Communication

More than 90 percent of communication may be nonverbal

Culture can dictate how we use body language

Is using a smiley face the answer to online body language?

How do you communicate?

Social Networking

Over 90% of Americans have internet access and half of those use social network sites

These sites offer someone the opportunity to:Explore their identities.Make new friends.Voice their opinions.Explore their sexuality.Be creative.Continue to develop long-standing relationships.

Things that make you go hmm…Do you think this type of social communication affects

how people interact when they are face to face?

The Facebook Phenomenon

Pros

Keep in touch with acquaintances

Support from acquaintances is meaningful

Maintain relationships, make new friend

Cons

Private events become public

Can be used to humiliate, bully, harass or stalk

Takes time and attention away from other responsibilities

Friendship

“The most holy bond of society”•Every culture has prized the respect, tolerance, and loyalty that friendship builds and nurtures•Qualities of a Good Friend: • Honesty, acceptance, dependability, empathy, and

loyalty

•Do you think you exceed the “Dunbar number” of friends?

Dating on campus

• You can learn how to make conversation, get to know more about others as well as yourself, and share feelings, opinions, and interests • However, many young people meet and maintain

contact online where certain interaction is lost

• College hook-ups usually involve two people who have met earlier in the evening and agree to engage in some sexual behavior, after which there is little or no expectation of future commitment• Consequences include STIs, sexual assaults, and the

“double standard” still exists

How to be Single and Satisfied

Fill your life with meaningful work, experiences, and people.

Build a network of supportive friends who care about you.

Be open to new experiences that can expand your feelings about yourself and your world.

Don’t miss out on a special event because you don’t have someone to accompany you.

Enjoy your own company.

Volunteer to help others less fortunate, or become involved in church and social organizations.

Healthy Relationships

IntimacyA state of closeness between two

people, characterized by the desire and ability to share one’s innermost thoughts and feelings with each other.

Although intimacy doesn’t require sex, an intimate relationship often includes a sexual relationship

Healthy Relationships

InfatuationRefers only to falling in love.Infatuation doesn’t last for the long haulInfatuation also can be a disguise for

something quite different: a strong sex drive, a fear of loneliness, loneliness itself, or a hunger for approval.

Healthy Relationships

AttractionMost of us end up with partners much like

ourselves—in age, race, ethnicity, socioeconomic class, education, etc.

4 Predictors for attraction among College Students Warmth and kindness.Desirable personality.Something specific about the person.Reciprocal liking.

Psychological View Of Love

• Liking

• Infatuation

• Romantic Love

• Compassionate Love

• Fatuous Love

• Consummate Love

3 Components Of Love6 Types Of Love

Anthropological View Of Love

A near universal experience for all cultures

• Primitive, basic human emotion

• Historically, it pulled people together for child-rearing

• Four-year ‘itch’ is present across cultures

Biochemical View Of Love

Love causes changes in the brain

• Causes release of stimulants: Dopamine, norepinephrine, phenylethylamine

• After initial infatuation, love causes release of endorphins

Endorphins and stimulants create the physical symptoms of love and the feelings of well-being, security and tranquility of longer-

lasting relationships

Dysfunctional Relationships Harm Health

Dysfunctional

Relationship

Does not promote healthy communication, honesty and intimacy

Physical Symptoms

Headaches

Digestive Trouble

Difficulty Sleeping

Evaluate your relationship on page 133.

It takes a lot of time and energy to change a dysfunctional relationship.

Beware Of Abuse In Relationships

Abuse

Behavior to control another person

- fear, humiliation, verbal or

physical assault

Emotional Abuse

Constant berating, belittling or criticism

Wears away at trust, self-worth and belief in self

Reach out to your friends and family for help if you think you are in an abusive relationship

Codependency

Defined

Behavior learned by family members to survive great pain and stress of their loved one’s addiction or illness

Treatment

Individual and group therapy

Education

Codependents Anonymous

CodependencyAmong the characteristics of codependency are:

• An exaggerated sense of responsibility.• An attraction to people who need rescuing.• Always trying to do more than one’s share.

• Doing anything to cling to a relationship.• An extreme need for approval and recognition.

• A sense of guilt.• A compelling need to control others.

• Lack of trust in self and/or others.• Fear of being alone.

• Difficulty identifying feelings. • Rigidity/difficulty.• Chronic anger.

• Lying/dishonesty.• Poor communications.

• Difficulty making decision

Transitioning To Adulthood

Successful Transition Includes:

Completing school

Establishing independent household

Being employed full-time

Marriage and children (possibly)

Cohabitation Has Become More Common

Cohabitation increased by 13 percent from 2009 to 2010

Reasons couples decide to live together:

Economic

Social acceptance of cohabitation

More time together

‘Test’ relationship

Alternative to marriage

Unmarried Couple Households

Risen dramatically in the past 50 years

Same-Sex Couples

Relationship follows familiar stages

• Intense passion and romantic love

• Starting home together

• Building trust and dependability

• Establishing strong partnership

Experience more social isolation

Use more affection and humor during disagreements

Marriage Brings Benefits And Challenges

Benefits

Better physical and mental health

Longer life

Less disease and common illnesses

Challenges

Requires preparation

Common challenges require effort• money, sex and careers

Divorce rate remains 50%

Premarital Assessments

There are scientific methods of predicting marital happiness though assessment inventories that address all aspects of a relationship.

Other common predictors of marital discord, unhappiness, and separation are:• High level of arousal during a discussion.• Defensive behaviors such as making excuses.• A wife’s expression of contempt.• A husband’s stonewalling.

Common Issues In Long-Term Relationships

Money

Sex

Extramarital Affairs

Two-Career Couples

Conflict

Saving Marriages

• Couples therapy uses a variety of psychological

techniques to help couples understand and overcome

their conflicts

• Behavioral marital therapy

• Emotionally focused therapy

• Insight-oriented marital therapy

Suggestions For Relationship Success

Focus on friendship

Remember the beginning

Show respect

Compliment your partner

Forgive one another

Keep positive interactions more frequent than negative interactions

Diversity

• Blended families are those in which one or both of the partners bring children from a previous union.

• The proportion of babies born to unmarried parents has grown from 4% in 1940 to 40% currently.

• Unmarried African American mothers have the lowest marriage and cohabitation and the highest break-up rates.