hot spot issue #300

8/9/2019 Hot Spot Issue #300

1/44


2/44


3/44

LOUNGES & CLUBS

Mr. Wonderfuls icIsland Breeze 09Frozen Paradise icNetties Lounge 24Rosettes 19Inferno Lounge icRaymonds Players Club 10Da Boat 13

TRANSPORTATIONBobby Albright 35Alex Alick 35

ENTERTAINMENTDr. I.M. Smartt Lottery 35HOT SPOT Maze 36SUDOKU 36SUDOKU Solution 39DJ Dirty Redd 09DJ Postman 09DJ Mack Daddy 05Insomniacts Entertainment 09Trevon Stand 06Domino Theory Band 32Inferno Monday Night 33

SERVICESMind of Creations 08Restore Your Photos 14, 04HOT SPOT Printing 05One Time Pest Control 03J.J.s Tire World 29JJ & Ys Auto Detailing 29Family Reunion Book 35Washers and Dryers 38

CLOTHING & FASHIONHOT SPOT Stuff

EVENTSTraveling 6 Pack Daytona Trip 27Traveling 6 Pack Party 32Jones Wedding Anniversary 06Baby Boy Julian Polite Jr. 34

FOOD & DININGShell Shoppe Seafood 11Pats Catering 35

HEALTH & BEAUTYMedicaid Advantage 05AVON 42

LEGAL & FINANCIALMAX$ TAXS 03Medicare Upgrade 41

A Brighter Day Bail Bond 26

TECHNOLOGYRestore Your Photos 04, 14HOT SPOT Online 15

AROUND TOWNAround TownAround TownAround Town ExtraAround Town ExtraMore Around TownMore Around Town

FEATURESHOT SPOT Reps 14HOT SPOT Subscribe 35One Mans Opinion 02HOT SPOT Schedule 05HOT SPOT Rates 32LaughsAll Eyes on Egipt 16All Eyes on Egipt 17

Floyd Adams, Jr. 09


4/44

One Mans Opinion

Part II spent the last four days, Friday through Tuesday with my Dad in

Hartsville, SC. Hes 90+ and Im 59+, so we had 150 years of oldmen keeping each other company. So it went like this.

Friday: we ate, sat in front of the TV, took a nap, ate, took a nap,went to bed.

Saturday: we ate, sat in front of the TV, took a nap, woke up and ate. He threatened to do someyard work, I talked him out of it, so we ate and took a nap. We woke up, I threatened to do the yardwork but he talked me out of it, so we ate, he complained that it was too cold, I complained that itwas too hot, so we took a nap in front of the TV, woke up and ate and went to bed.

Sunday: we ate, took a nap, woke up I went to the movies, Daddy took another nap. Hes moreskilled in the complexities of napping, I just couldnt keep up. When I came back, he complained thatit was too cold, I complained that it was too hot, so we ate, sat in front of the TV, took a nap so wewould be rested to go to bed. We woke up and ate and went to bed.

Monday: we ate, sat in front of the TV, took a nap, woke up and ate. He threatened to do some yardwork, I talked him out of it, so we ate and took a nap. We woke up, I threatened to do the yard workbut it rained, so we ate, he complained that it was too cold, I complained that it was too hot, so wetook a nap in front of the TV, woke up and ate and went to bed.

Tuesday: We got up and ate and I left for Savannah, Daddy was preparing for his nap. He already

has his Master of Napology Degree and only needs a few more hours for his Phd. Over the weekendI completed the requirements for BSNT Degree, (Bachelor of Science in Napping Technology) andhope to do graduate work real soon.

It was a great weekend, just me and Dad, I AM BLESSED to have BOTH my Parents still with me.Excuse me, Im going to take a nap.

Just, One Mans Opinion.Live Long and Prosper

Ronald A. Gilliard, Publisher

Thanks Savannah, for 12 Years of the HOT SPOT!


5/44


6/44


7/44

P.O. Box 1531Savannah, GA 31402

Cell: 912-507-3652Email:

[email protected]

Specializing in Adult EventsSorry, No Teens


8/44


9/44


10/44


11/44


12/44

Laughs

Dear Internal Revenue Service:Enclosed you will find my 2005 tax return showing that I

owe $3,407.00 in taxes. Please note the attached articlefrom the USA Today newspaper, dated 12 November, whereinyou will see the Pentagon (Department of Defense) is paying$171.50 per hammer and NASA has paid $600.00 per toilet seat.

I am enclosing four (4) toilet seats (valued @ $2,400) and six(6) hammers valued @ $1,029), which I secured at Home De-

pot, bringing my total remittance to $3,429.00.

Please apply the overpayment of $22.00 to the "PresidentialElection Fund," as noted on my return. You can do this inexpen-sively by sending them one (1) 1.5 " Phillips Head screw (seeaforementioned article from USA Today newspaper detailinghow H.U.D. pays $22.00 each for 1.5" Phillips Head Screws).

One screw is enclosed for your convenience.

It has been a pleasure to pay my tax bill this year, and I lookforward to paying it again next year.

Sincerely,

A Satisfied Taxpayer

LaughsEVER WONDER...

Why the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?

Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?

Why you don't ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"?

Why "abbreviated" is such a long word?

Why doctors call what they do "practice"?

Why you have to click on "Start" to stop Windows XP?

Why lemon juice is made with artificial flavor, while dishwashingliquid is made with real lemons?

Why the man who invests all your money is called a broker?

Why there isn't mouse-flavored cat food? who tastes dog food when ithas a "new & improved" flavor?

Why they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?Why they don't make the whole plane out of the material used for theindestructible black box ?

Why sheep don't shrink when it rains?

Why they are called apartments when they are all stuck together? if conis the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?


13/44

Laughs

On reaching his plane seat a man is surprised to

see a parrot strapped in next to him. He asks thestewardess for a coffee where upon the parrot

squawks "And get me a whisky you cow!" The

stewardess, flustered, brings back a whisky for

the parrot and forgets the coffee.

When this omission is pointed out to her the par-

rot drains its glass and bawls "And get me an-

other whisky you idiot". Quite upset, the girl

comes back shaking with another whisky but still

no coffee.

Unaccustomed to such slackness the man triesthe parrot's approach "I've asked you twice for a

coffee, go and get it now or I'll kick you".

The next moment, both he and the parrot have

been wrenched up and thrown out of the emer-

gency exit by two burly stewards. Plunging

downwards the parrot turns to him and says "For

someone who can't fly, you complain too much!"

Laughs

A man placed some flowers on thegrave of his dearly departed mother and

started back toward his car when his at-

tention was diverted to another man

kneeling at a grave. The man seemed to

be praying with profound intensity and

kept repeating, Why did you have to

die? Why did you have to die? The

first man approached him and said, Sir,

I dont wish to interfere with your pri-

vate grief, but this demonstration of

pain is more than Ive ever seen before.

For whom do you mourn so deeply? A

child? A parent? The mourner took a

moment to collect himself, then replied,

My wifes first husband.


14/44

Laughs

A snake and a rabbit were racing along a pair

of intersecting forest pathways one day, when

they collided at the intersection. They imme-

diately began to argue with one another as to

who was at fault for the mishap.

When the snake remarked that he had been

blind since birth, and thus should be given ad-

ditional leeway, the rabbit said that he, too,

had been blind since birth. The two animals

then forgot about the collision and began

commiserating concerning the problems of

being blind.

The snake said that his greatest regret was theloss of his identity. He had never been able to

see his reflection in the water, and for that

reason did not know exactly what he looked

like, or even what he was. The rabbit declared

that he had the same problem. Seeing a way

that they could help each other, the rabbit pro-

posed that one feel the other from head to toe,

and then try to describe what the other animal

was.

The snake agreed, and started by winding

himself around the rabbit. After a few mo-

ments, he announced, "You've got very soft,

fuzzy fur, long ears, big rear feet, and a little

fuzzy ball for a tail. I think that you must be a

bunny rabbit!"

The rabbit was much relieved to find his iden-

tity, and proceeded to return the favor to the

snake. After feeling about the snake's body

for a few minutes, he asserted, "Well, you're

scaly, you're slimy, you've got beady little

eyes, you squirm and slither all the time, and

you've got a forked tongue. I think you're a

lawyer!"

Laughs

Top Ten Things I Can Say Now

That I Lost "American Idol"

10. "If I had won, I was gonna blowthe prize money on candy and fire-works"9. "Honestly, I thought I was audi-tioning for 'The Apprentice'"8. "Ryan Seacrest isn't as smart ashe seems on TV"7. "If you want to see me 'perform,'I'll be working the noon-to-8 shiftat Old Navy tomorrow"6. "George W. Bush didn't win thepopular vote either, and he's donepretty well for himself"5. "Underneath that table, RandyJackson doesn't wear pants"

4. "Until 10 minutes ago, I had noidea who Dave Letterman was"3. "I could take down Clay Aikenwith one arm in a sling"2. "I handled my loss well -- I gath-ered my belongings, said my good-byes and keyed the crap out of

Simon's car"1. "I have one thing to say to thevoters: What in the hell is wrongwith you people?"


15/44


16/44

Laughs

Top Ten Things You Need To Know

To Be A Nurse

10. If it's wet make it dry.

9. If it's dry make it wet.8. Always ask for on-call pay beforeagreeing to overtime.7. Never tell management what youare really thinking.6. Never finish report with, "You havean easy assignment".5. Never say. "This looks like a easyassignment".

4. Don't expect nurses aids to do theirjob.3. Don't expect doctors to believe anything you tell them.2. If you don't have enough time to doeverything, take about 30 minutes tocomplain about it.1. If it moves, rattles, shakes, fallsdown, or won't stay in place: tape it.

For Advertising in theHOT SPOT Contact:

Gary (843) 226-8829

Check Out Our Website: TheHotSpotMagazine.com

For Advertising in the

HOT SPOT Contact:

Denny (912) 428-3701


17/44

MISSED YOUR

HOT SPOT?Now You Dont Have To.

You Can See Your HOT SPOT Online at the

Following Web Sites

Website: TheHotSpotMagazine.com

Website: Scribd.com Keyword: The Hot Spot

Website: Facebook.com Ronald GilliardWebsite: Facebook.com The Hot Spot Magazine

Youtube: SavHotSpot

Watch Our Videos from HOT SPOT TV

On the HOT SPOT Channel

Keep in Touch and Find Out Whats

Going On in the Clubs and at Events,

As It Happens.


18/44


19/44

MORE AROUND TOWN


20/44

Laughs

New Rule: Stop giving me that pop-up ad

for Classmates.com! There's a reason you

don't talk to people for 25 years. Because

you don't particularly like them! Besides,

I already know what the captain of thefootball team is doing these days: mowing

my lawn.

New Rule: There's no such thing as fla-

vored water. There's a whole aisle of this

crap at the supermarket, water, but with-

out that watery taste. Sorry, but flavored

water is called a soft drink. You want fla-

vored water? Pour some scotch over iceand let it melt. That's your flavored water.

New Rule: Ladies, leave your eyebrows

alone. Here's how much men care about

your eyebrows: do you have two of them?

Okay, we're done.

As the family gathered for a big dinner to-

gether, the youngest son announced that he

had just signed up at an army recruiter's

office. There were audible gasps around the

table, then some laughter, as his older

brothers shared their disbelief that he could

handle this new situation. "Oh, come on,

quit joking," snickered one. "You didn't

really do that, did you?" "You would never

get through basic training," scoffed an-other. The new recruit looked to his mother

for help, but she was just gazing at him.

When she finally spoke, she simply asked,

"Do you really plan to make your own bed

every morning?"

Laughs

Dictionary for Women

Argument (ar*gyou*ment) n. A discussion that occurs when you're

right, but he just hasn't realized it yet.

Airhead (er*hed) n. What a woman intentionally becomes when pulled

over by a policeman.

Bar-be-que (bar*bi*q) n. You bought the groceries, washed the lettuce,

chopped the tomatoes, diced the onions, marinated the meat and

cleaned everything up, but, he, "made the dinner."

Blonde jokes (blond joks) n. Jokes that are short so men can under-

stand them.

Cantaloupe (kant*e*lope) n. Gotta get married in a church.

Clothes dryer (kloze dri*yer) n. An appliance designed to eat socks.

Diet Soda (dy*it so*da) n. A drink you buy at a convenience store to

go with a half pound bag of peanut M&Ms.

Eternity (e*ter*ni*tee) n. The last two minutes of a football game.

Exercise (ex*er*siz) v. To walk up and down a mall, occasionally rest-

ing to make a purchase.

Grocery List (grow*ser*ee list) n. What you spend half an hour writ-

ing, then forget to take with you to the store.

Hair Dresser (hare dres*er) n. Someone who is able to create a style

you will never be able to duplicate again. See "Magician."

Hardware Store (hard*war stor) n. Similar to a black hole in space-if

he goes in, he isn't coming out anytime soon.

Childbirth (child*brth) n. You get to go through 36 hours of contrac-

tions; he gets to hold your hand and say "focus,...breath...push..."

Lipstick (lip*stik) n. On your lips, coloring to enhance the beauty of

your mouth. On his collar, coloring only a tramp would wear...!

Park (park) v./n. Before children, a verb meaning, "to go somewhereand neck." After children, a noun meaning a place with a swing set and

slide.

Patience (pa*shens) n. The most important ingredient for dating, mar-

riage and children. See also "tranquilizers."

Waterproof Mascara (wah*tr*pruf mas*kar*ah) n. Comes off if you

cry, shower, or swim, but will not come off if you try to remove it.

Valentine's Day (val*en*tinez dae) n. A day when you have dreams of

a candlelight dinner, diamonds, and romance, but consider yourself

lucky to get a card.


21/44


22/44


23/44


24/44

MORE AROUND TOWN


25/44

MORE AROUND TOWN


26/44


27/44


28/44

JORIEFWILLIAMS TIFFANY DIXONLYNCH JASMINE L.WHITE STARROLIVER

AKEEMDAVIS DENISEMOORE RUSSELLE.GILBERT MICKALEFERRELL

BENJAMINWEBBER SELENA YOUNG EDRICABROWN DEMETRIAJACKSON

MIKEROBINSON JAMESWRIGHTJR DOMINICKJACKSON DYSHONL.HOWARD


29/44


30/44

Our publication schedule is the 2nd and 4th Wednesdays

of every month. The deadline for inclusion is the Fridaybefore the 2nd & 4th Wed. Our advertising rates are below.

Size Color Black & WhiteCovers (Front or Back) $200.00 N/AFull Page $140.00 $70.00Half Page $75.00 $40.00Quarter Page $45.00 $30.00Business Card $25.00 N/A

To Advertise: Phone: (912) 484-1143Email: [email protected]

Web Site: TheHotSpotMagazine.com

The Leader in Affordable Advertising

Times are Tight. Your Advertising Budget is Being Squeezed. You Know You

Must Advertise to Succeed. Make the Most of Your Advertising Dollars.

Advertise in the HOT SPOTThe Leader in Affordable Advertising

We Will Get Your Message Out.

Phone: 912-484-1143

Fax: 866-416-0074

Email: [email protected]

Email: [email protected]

Website: www.thehotspotmagazine.com

Being in Business and not Advertising is like Blinking your Eyes in a Dark Room.

You know what Youre doing, but Nobody else does.


31/44


32/44

Laughs

Occasionally, airline attendants make an effort tomake the "in-flight safety lecture" and their other

announcements a bit more entertaining. Here are

some real examples that have been heard or re-

ported:

"There may be 50 ways to leave your lover, but

there are only 4 ways out of this airplane..."Pilot - "Folks, we have reached our cruising altitude

now, so I am going to switch the seat belt sign off.

Feel free to move about as you wish, but please stayinside the plane till we land ... it's a bit cold outside,

and if you walk on the wings it affects the flight pat-

tern."

And, after landing: "Thank you for flying Delta

Business Express. We hope you enjoyed giving usthe business as much as we enjoyed taking you for aride."

After a particularly rough landing during thunder-storms in Memphis, a flight attendant on a North-

west flight announced: "Please take care when open-

ing the overhead compartments because, after a

landing like that, sure as Hell everything hasshifted."

From a Southwest Airlines employee.... "Welcomeaboard Southwest Flight XXX to YYY. To operate

your seatbelt, insert the metal tab into the buckle,

and pull tight. It works just like every other seatbelt,and if you don't know how to operate one, you

probably shouldn't be out in public unsupervised. In

the event of a sudden loss of cabin pressure, oxygenmasks will descend from the ceiling. Stop scream-

ing, grab the mask, and pull it over your face. If you

have a small child traveling with you, secure your

mask before assisting with theirs. If you are travel-ing with two small children, decide now which one

you love more.

Weather at our destination is 50 degrees with some

broken clouds, but they'll try to have them fixed be-

fore we arrive. Thank you, and remember, nobodyloves you, or your money, more than Southwest Air-

lines."

Laughs

"As you exit the plane, please make sure to gather

all of your belongings. Anything left behind will be

distributed evenly among the flight attendants.Please do not leave children or spouses."

"Last one off the plane must clean it."

And from the pilot during his welcome message:

"We are pleased to have some of the best flight at-tendants in the industry ...Unfortunately none of

them are on this flight...!

Heard on Southwest Airlines just after a very hardlanding in Salt Lake City: The flight attendant came

on the intercom and said, "That was quite a bump

and I know what ya'll are thinking. I'm here to tellyou it wasn't the airline's fault, it wasn't the pilot's

fault, it wasn't the flight attendants' fault.....it was theasphalt!"

Another flight Attendant's comment on a less thanperfect landing: "We ask you to please remain

seated as Captain Kangaroo bounces us to the termi-

nal."

After a real crusher of a landing in Phoenix, the

Flight Attendant came on with, "Ladies and Gentle-

men, please remain in your seats until Captain Crash

and the Crew have brought the aircraft to a screech-ing halt up against the gate. And, once the tire

smoke has cleared and the warning bells are si-lenced, we'll open the door and you can pick your

way through the wreckage to the terminal.

As the plane landed and was coming to a stop at

Washington National, a lone voice comes over the

loudspeaker: "Whoa, big fella. WHOA!"

Part of a Flight Attendant's arrival announcement:"We'd like to thank you folks for flying with us to-day. And, the next time you get the insane urge to go

blasting through the skies in a pressurized metal

tube, we hope you'll think of us here at US Air-ways."


33/44


34/44


35/44


36/44


37/44


38/44

SUDOKU

The rules of Sudoku are simple. Enter

digits from 1 to 9 into the

blank spaces. Every row must contain

one of each digit. So must

every column, as must every 3x3

square. Each Sudoku has a

unique solution that can be reached

logically without guessing.

The Solution is at the end of the Book.

No Peeking.

HOT SPOT MAZE


39/44


40/44

Laughs

"The car won't start," aid a wife to her husband. "Ithink there's water in the carburetor." "How do you

know?" said the husband scornfully. "You don't even

know what the carburetor is." "I'm telling you,"repeated the wife, "I'm sure there's water in the

carburetor."

"We'll see," mocked the husband. "Let me check itout. Where's the car?" "In the swimming pool."


41/44

Sudoku Solution

Laughs

A completely inebriated man was stumbling downthe street with one foot on the curb and one foot inthe gutter. A cop pulled up and said, "I've got totake you in, pal. You're obviously drunk."

Our wasted friend asked, "Officer, are ya abso-

lutely sure I'm drunk?"

"Yeah, buddy, I'm sure," said the copper. "Let'sgo."

Breathing a sigh of relief, the wino said, "Thankgoodness, I thought I was crippled."

A doctor, a lawyer, a little boy and a priest

were out for a Sunday afternoon flight on a

small private plane. Suddenly, the plane devel-oped engine trouble.

In spite of the best efforts of the pilot, the

plane started to go down. Finally, the pilot

grabbed a parachute, yelled to the passengers

that they had better jump, and bailed out.

Unfortunately, there were only three para-

chutes remaining.

The doctor grabbed one and said "I'm a doctor,

I save lives, so I must live," and jumped out.

The lawyer then said, "I'm a lawyer and law-

yers are the smartest people in the world. I de-

serve to live."

He also grabbed a parachute and jumped.

The priest looked at the little boy and said,

"My son, I've lived a long and full life. Youare young and have your whole life ahead of

you. Take the last parachute and live in peace."

The little boy handed the parachute back to the

priest and said, "Not to worry, Father. The

'smartest man in the world' just took off with

my back pack."


42/44

1998-2010


43/44


44/44

hot spot issue #300

Documents