iron warrior: volume 10, issue 6
TRANSCRIPT
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I R O WMay 19, 1989 THE ENGiNEERING SOCIETY S STUDENT FORUM
~ Y O F - . r < . : -
In This Issue:
Formula S.A.E. Car
Registration B :I£s
w · Age Avoi ism
SPACENEWS
What is ESSCO?
Tender Kisses and Smiles
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Page 2 Iron Warrior
o Thought Required This would be my first editorial
of any kind eve r. The pressure is
just overwhelming. I've got to stay
within those stringent bounds t.hat
define t.he Iron Warrior. At th e same
time, I have to manage somehow to
amuse and entertain and what.not.
Plus, there's the ego element. Af
ter all, eve ry new e ditor wants to
be "t.he best danm editor there ever
was "
I thought I'd kick off the t erm by
being totally typical. Lets discuss
some important engineering issues,
shall we? Since its th e sunuuer term,
t.he big words and lengthy justifi
cations have b een removed. II nun
nurull ...
To start, SDI is a really bad thing.
How many articles in past IW is
sues have you seen that argue for
Star Wars? Is there anyone on cam
pus who thinks t.hat SDI would be agoocl idea?
Of course, there's t.he eng ineer
ing elective issue. We need more
electives in engineering to ma k e us
more well-rounded (whatever that.
means). Never mind that there is
absolutely no t.ime for .an engineer
t.o fit in more' undergrad electives, or
that. most. people only work at. th eir
non-techs t.wice each term.
What about. stress? St.ress is a
bad t.hing, y'know. You have to
learn t.o deal with it, or you won't
make it. through. Learn to relax,
take some time off. You'll be a bet.-
I just bought a WPIRG mug.
(For those of you who don't know
what that is, it 's a refillable mug
that you can use to buy a Inrg cof
fee or t.ea at. the C&D. This art.icle
mainly for t.hese people. )
Now, t.his may not. seem like sucha hig deal J know I shOlllcln't
be clrinldng coRcf' anyway - but. I'm
proud of y purchase bec ause to me
it. represent s an awareness of our en
vironment. It means t.hat. 1 won't.he using over a hundred styrofoal\l
ClipS this t('rl1l w hen I buy Illy coffee
at the C I> every morning. A small
st.ep, bnt only the lat.es t in a ho pe
fully continuing change of at.titude.
(M y last ~ t e p was inst.illing in lUyself
a great sense of guilt if I ever t.hrow
ou t. a piece of paper.)
To me, the Earth and what h1l
mans are doing to it is one of the
most important issues that we face
t.oday. I mean, this is it: t.his is th e
The Iron Wan;iQr is a forum for
thought. provoking and informative articles
presented by the academic community ofthe University of Waterloo. Views
expressed in the Iron Warrior. other than
dle editorials. are those of dle authors and
do not necessarily reflect the opinions of
dle editors or the ~ Society.
The Iron Warrior encourages
submissions from students, faculty and
other methi)ers of the univeTSity
community. SubmuliOld should reflectthe concerns and mte11bCtual of the
university in ~ an4 should be
typewrfttett ii neatl,. written.~ a p a c e d and OD one side e>f the pas.
only. The author'. ~ (ifapplicable). and phone nuuaber shoUld bebleluded.
ter pl'rson.
IlIIage has oft.en been the topic of
debat.e . We seem to feel compelled
to create some sort of god-like image
of engineers in the minds of t he pub
lic We don't drink, we study really
hard, we're nice guys (and girls) andhave a human side.
And then t.here's und ergrad uate
funding . We're really unclerfunded,
eh? Our labs are und er-equipped,
and tuition is sooo expens ive. Is
there anyone who attends an On
tario university who thinks that
the government should give post-
only Earth we have and we seem to
he trying our darnedest. to dest.roy
it . EVl'n the above sent.ence shows
a fault in aHitude: jt. supposes own
ersh ip . Mankind has always seemed
t.o think that the Eart h and its re
~ o l l f c e s are here for our use - t.hey
belong to us and we lllay do what.
Wf' want with them. This att.itude is
l i 1 1 l i n a t i n g f o r c s t ~ through acid rain
~ n d logging, it's killing ofT t hOllsands
of ~ p c c i e s of ani mals, it 's dest roy ing
the atmosphere and wat er .
1t Sf f ms that ev n tl1(> reasons he
hind st.opping the de tructiOIl reflect
this OWllPfShip at tit ue/p . We should
c\pan tip the wat er so that w can
drink it. We should preserve forest
and wildlife so t.ha(. we can look at
it. Everything in this world is for
our benefit . Everything has a value.
Well, anyway. This is not a new
opinion, and I suppose I shouldn't
All submissions, unless otherwise
slaled, become the property of the him
Warrior. which reserves the right to refusepublicalion of material which it deems
unsuitable. The IroD Warrior also reserves
the right to edit arammar, spelling and
portions of lext that do not meet
university standards. Authors will be
notified of any m ~ j o r changes that may. be
requiIed.All sllbmissions and advertising
enquiries should be forw..-ded to:
secondary education less money?
Maybe we should pay full tuition in
stead of one third or one eighth or
whatever we pay now.
There, now that. you know whatthe popular stands on these issues
ar e , you don 't ha ve to apply any
thought to any of them again. Come
to think of it, I don't have to write
any more edit.orials either'
speak strongly about it unless I 'm
prepared to propose a strong solu
tion. After all, I only bought a plas
tic mug . What I do think we need
most of all is a change of attitude, an
awareness of the environment and
its l i m i t ~ This is happening now,
wit.h the WPIRG mugs and the re
cycling programs - small steps t.hat
at least signal t.his at.titude change.
As engineers, we must e ~ p e c i a y be
aware of the impact. of our work on
the land and air and water. We
can't leave concern for the ecology
t.o t. hose Artsies because it see m s
the thing for them to do. It 's the
t.hing for eve rybody .0 do.
So. f you use a lot of st.yro
foam cups, huy a WPIRG mug. And
don't. use your blue recycling box as
a laundry basket..
May 19, 1989
Editors
Carolyn French
GeoffVona
Writers
Not Dean lennox
Jay GibsonErik KerstenbeckSteve RobinsonEdmond ChowJoe AJeixoCynthia SmartJody levine
Joanne WadeSA JonesEric PJamondon
Wendy BoltJackie MorganSteve RobinsonEric langford
PodzieBruce RobinsonGunge
j
- t
CQPY ~ d i t i n gRuss ChangChris Shapiro
ArMste
Brian Sullivan
Pbotography
David Chen
Paul Martin
Advertising
Christine BurkeTeresa FungAndrew Maclean
lQyout MQDQgerTodd Ruthman
LaYQutRoy UnnyDan Curtin
Chris BaisleyChris ShapiroDebbie GibsonRuss ChangEdmond ChowKevin MoonTeresa FungYuri QuintanaMatt Powell
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May 19, 1989 Iron Warrior Page 3
Prezby Jay Gibson
Greetings The weather has yetto make up its mind-but it definitely feels like sUlluner is upon usMuch has happened since we werelast on campus, and there is lots
in store this swnmer. First about
last term. B-Soc had a busy winter, running many successful events.
P.O. E .T.S saw a "Bohemian NewYear's" party and a "Surfing the
Bell Curve" Pub as well as several "Alternative Cinema Nights."
On t.he more serious side, they ran
an "Informational Seminar" for high
school guidance councilors from allacross southern Ontario. The alsoran a very productive "Engineering
Forum" which saw about 80 stu
dents, faculty and staff gather to dis
cuss topics ranging from "The Problems with Lans" to "8 month workterms" to "Engineering Ethics."
The 4th year Civil "Concrete Toboggan Team" came a close secondout of 34 teams out west at UBC.
The Eng Ball and the Bus Push werealso great successes. All in all, B-Socmanaged to stay busy without goingbankrupt (though rumours say they
tried hard')
I am sure that most of youhave noticed some changes from last
term. The CPH Foyer now has alarge whiteboard displaying impor
t.ant messages and announcements.
-Spews
MacBooth users now can print doc
ument.s without having to fight forthe Mac in the Orifice. We also havea big, brand new darkroom behind
EL211.
Of all the changes, probably the
C&D contains t.he most visible ones .These are largely due to the out-
standing efforts of Scott Rose, one
of our students who had lots of freetime on his work term in the Syste ms Lab, and Mary Trinunel he
C&D manager. We have two large
refrigerators. The triple Coke fridgewas given to us since we a ~ e the third
largest seller of canned Coke prod
ucts in the K -W area We also have
a new coffee maker (wi th water fil-ters ), new tables and a new, more
efficient traffic flow. I was prolld to
give Scott a President's Award forhis great work at th e first council
meeting. There will be further improvements this term.
Other places that will see some
improvements this sununer will beP.O.E.T.S. (new bar, new furniture) , the Orifice (paint job, new
au t.ofeed photocopier), and the MacBooth (new Macs, new stools ( )).If you have any suggestions as to
ot.her needed improvement.s-let. me
know
Dean Doesn't Say
not by Dean Lennox
The Dean couldn't get anything
ready for us (we told him about the
deadline on Tuesday), so this article
is not by the Dean.This term is going to be great.
The sun will shine and it will be-verywarm from now until August. Everyone will get great marks and have
lots of fun. All engineering students
will learn alot from their fantast.icprofessors and invite them all to dinner at the end of the year.
The graduating class will give usall lots of money and all labs willhe made wonderful. There will be
enough money left over for all engineering students to go to Florida
during the winter t.erm in 1990. You
will be given a two-week reading
break in March of 1990 wit.h no
condit.ions. No assignments will behanded out until after the hreak.
Everyone will get exactly the job
they want and will make lot s of
money t.his fall. All t he other engineering schools will take note of
this and concede that Waterloo isthe best school in the world. Many
fourth -year U of T students willshow up in this fall's frosh class. Female enrolment. will increase 6000%t o make the class of 1994 the firstto have an even split of males and
femal es.The Depart.ment. of Coordination
and Placement. will realize the error
of their ways and knock the co-opfee down t o $6.00. There will heno incirlpntal fpes. Thev will fl'( 1 sobad about overcharging st.1\dents for
so long that. they will refund all the
student's money. The engineering
student.s will use this money to buy
me a brand new Honda Prelude with
power windows and racing stripes.
In short, everything will be wonderful. Your wildest dreams willcome true this term. Have a good
one.
Though EngSoc will be busy with
the above project. , by no means willthe event cheanle slow down. Infad, thi will a. 'VERY 1 11 Y summer
in t ha t. area. Check out just some of
the big events for the ununer:
June 2-4:June 22:
July 1:July 9:
July 14:
July 15:
White Water RaftingRock the BoatCruise in Toronto
HarbourCanada DayRing Road CyclingRunning RaceBlue Jay / SkyDomeRoad tripOUtdoor P_O.E.T.SPatio pub
l l keeping with the busy mood,
the Iron Warrior is going to pub
lish four issues t.his SUlluner-not
an easy feat, so please come out
and help by writing or doing layout.or helping with advert.ising. (G eoffand Carolyn may look like .vicioustyrants, but t.hey are actually a lot
offun to work wit.h ) There is lots of
FRESHtlWIE\lt\DE BLRGERS STLFF
opportunity for budding reporters,
writers, graphic artists, and photog
raphers . The Iron Warrior is the
most respected Engineering Newspaper in Canada-be a part of it.
eoff lnd Carolyn mil] looklike vicious tyrants, but ..
For the fourt.h year st.udents, 3and 2/3 yel\T are behind us, 11ternH down and nly 3 lef t It's timeto tart thinking graduation. As t.head elsewhere in this issue says, weneed to get t.he Graduat.ion Comntiltee going. If you plan on being
involved next winter, help gel. the
ball rolling this SUlluner. Each classhould start thinking about elect
ing a Grad. Conull. rep and start
taking lots of photos for your yearhoole Finally, don f forget about.Grad Photos next we ek . If y u don't
get yonr phot.os done now: yml will
n )1 be 011 the class composite and
may not make it int.o t.he Yearbook l
Sign lip in t he orifice now.Finally, there was a Fed. election
last term and the new Fed Executive are a good bunch of people.Dave Readman (an '89 Mech Eng
g r a d l 1 ~ . t p ) is tht' new P r t ~ i d p n t : Tim
Collins is the new VP Operations
Finance; and Fran W dowczyk isthe new VP Universit.y Affairs . For
those of you who have political int erests., th e Federat.ion Student. Council
is looking for two Engineering St.u(lent. Reps. In addition, t.he University Senate has one vacancy for an
Engineering Undergraduate.
Well, I think that. is enough 'Prez.
Spewing' for t h is issue. Please drop
by the Orifice or st.op me in thehan t o say "hello" and discuss anysuggestions or COIluuents you have
about Life the Universe and FreeBody Diagrams
,•
SAVE 180/0
210 KING ST. NW TERLOO
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Page 4 Iron Warrior May 19, 1989
What •IS ESSCO?
by Jody Levine
This is a question I have asked
myself almost as often as peoplehave asked me. At the ESSCO gener al meeting on May 6, I found whoit. is, what it is, and what it isn't. Iam hoping that this article will provoke as many questions as it pro vides answers.
The Engineering Student Societies Council of Ontario (ESSeO)
is not a branch of the Imperial OilCompany, nor is it the provincialboat racing t.eam. It. is a bunch
of engineer ing students from acrossOntario who got together over somecoffee and donuts (and later a fewbeers) to discuss some means of im pr oving li fe.
It was founded la st. year in the
wake of the success of COFIQ,
a similar organization in Quebec.COFIQ developed out of the need
for cheap microcomputers (which itgot) , and has grown to become areal kick-ass student lobby group
with which eng ineers can make their
op inions hea rd. ESSeO is slowlybut surely headed in that direction.
After last year's setbacks involving some not so cOlTu tt ed people and
some unrealistic goa ls, this year's
conunittee is super keen to get goingon its new projects. ESSCO's 1989objectives are to find ways of im proving engineering education and
increasing engineering awareness.How good is our education? The
ESS(,O Education C O l n u ~ ~ i o n e rwill be sending a survey t.o student.s
and industry across the province
New APEO PresidentTakes, Over
George Piper, P.Eng ., assumed
the office of President of the Association of Professional Engineers of Ont.ario (APEO) at t.he Association'sannual meeting Apri l 21. He succeeds William H. Kerr and wi11 remain in office until April 1990,
As priorities for rus term, Mr.
cation and training of engineers in
Canada .The APEO also has a new Exec
utive Director in Peter G.S, Large,P.Eng. Mr. Large replaces Alan C.
:agne , P . ng who has retired after serving as Executive Dir ectoryfor 12 years.
in order to determine what. people really think. Are our labs an
tiquidated and our courses obtuse?
Do our employers complain that wecan't speak English and that we
don't know how to turn a screwdriver? The results of the surveywill be taken to the universities' administration, the government and
the accreditation hoard. We can
have a voice in what, we learn.
Point numb er two: How many
frosh had no clue as to what engineering is about until they got
here? How many still don't, know?Who is going to list en to us i hedoesn't know who we are? All of
these questions point to the need
to tell the general public about engineering. The ESSeO awareness
group will be sending promotional
Recycling
BulletinAs you mayor may not. know,
Engineering Society is collecting tin
cans for recycling. The cans are taking up too much space, which is basically all air.
How about designing a cancrusher? The crusher must be compact in size and appealing to the eye.It. should accept one can at a timeand automatically put it in the appropriate compart ment (A or B) . Itshould also crush the cans automat
ically, Compartment A should contain only Pepsi- Cola products (the
cans are 100% aluminum). Com·
partment B should contain onlyCoca-Cola products (the cans havesteel in them) except for Diet 7-up,
flyers to Ontario hich schools in order to describe engineering from the
students' point of view. ESSCO
will also sponsor prizes for the best.engineering- related entries in local
science fairs. T.he idea is t.o showthe people what that iron ring really
Ineans.
Regardless of whether it is evident
in that last lab writeup, we like the
. things that we do. Why not. make
t.he bes t of it? To find out. more
about ESSCO as well as what this
and other engineering societies are
up to, drop by th e Orifice, I t could
be worth your while.
•PR S C R P T I 0 H S
We ccept University Drug pran
WESTMOUNT PlACE
PHARMACY886-7670
50 Westmount Rd. N.
OPEN DAILY9 am to 10 pm
SUNDAYS HOLIDAYSam to 9 pm
The Sanford Flenung Foundation
and Engineering Society will donate
_ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ p r i z e s a n d , ~ c o u e , i l i e r e w i l l b emajor P**S points given,
Piper will support the drafting of
a national definition of practice of
professional engineering, to helpclarify the Canadian professional engineer's scope of responsibility, and
will support reRcarch into the edu-
Mr. Large believes t.he Association must continue to play a major
role, through t.he Cana.dian Council of PrQfessional Engineers, in promot.ing national engineering issues,such as t.he development. of national
standards for engineering licensure,
WESTMOUNT KINGCENTRE PHARMACY
578 1610
King Centre
Salary
Professional engineers receive amedian annual salary of $55,000,an increase of 3.8 percent over t.heprevious year, according to statis
tics collected in a recent surveyconducted by the Association of
Professional Engineers of Ontario
(APEO).
The modest increase in median
salary was not unexpected since engineers salaries tend to track increases in the ( 'PI annual adjust
ments, says Stephen Jack, APEO
Conullunicat ions Director.
Jack cautions that the salary figures reflect base salary only and
do not include bonuses, profit sharing or fringe benefits. Performance
based pay is becoming more prevalent for engineers. In order to geta true picture of an engineer's total pay package, it 's necessary to
combine base salary with merit pay
awards. This kind of income is usually received as a lump sum bonusor profit sharing payment and must
be re-earned each year.The APEO survey, conducted De
cember 1988, indicates 16.5% of the
urvey
engineers received an average bonusof $11,177 while 1.5.4% received an
average profit. sharing payment of
$12,492.Th e 1988 survey shows that. pro
fessional engineers who have COlll
pleted a masters of business administration degree earned a median salary of $61,000. Those whoha.ve wmpletecl a doctorate earned$65, 740, One- third of all professional engineers hold other university degrees in addition to an engineering degree,
APEO has conducted the annual
member salary survey for 36 year.The Associat.ion, which is a regulatory body empowered under the
Professional Engineers Act of Ontario to license professional engineers, has been in existence since1922, Only licensed engineers are
permitted to use the designation,
P.Eng., which stands for professional engineer.
The APEO survey was sent to
47,430 licensed members. Valid responses were received from 35% of
APEO members. Women engineersma.de up 2.7% of the respondents.
Categories include the best. designon paper and the best prototype,
Judging will be held during Engineering Week (July 4-9 ).
OPEN DAILYMTWS 9:30 - 5:30
Thu Fri. 9:30 - 9:30Closed Sundays
ampus Shop
20 OFF• Sweatshirts
• Sweatpants• Hooded Sweatshirts
• Some Rugger shirts
Owned and operated by Federation of Students
Located in the Campus Centre Lower Mall
Hours 9 5 Mon Fri 885 1211 Ext. 2188
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May 19, 1989 Iron Warrior Page 5
WPIRG: You Can Help
which include acid rain, waste man
agement, water supply /pollut.ion,native rights, forestry, South Africa,and much more. Books and pe
riodicals can be borrowed for twoweeks-vert.ical files can he used in
our office or photocopied.
WPIRG provides students wit.hthe opportunity to do researcll
WPIRG workgroups allow stu
dents the opportunity to work with
other students in selecting and or
ganizing educational event for the
canlpus. In the pa.st, workgroup
members have organized an environmentru cla sics film series, a forum on free trade, a play about
apartheid, and speakers on a va.riety of issues. The workgroup meet
ings occur regularly throughout. theterm.
The financial and organizational
direction of WPIRG is provided by
a seven- member, student. board of
directors who are elected early in
t.he fall term. The progralTlIlling and
salary expenses of WPIRG are pro
vided by a $3.00 student. fee c01-
lect.ed each term. This fee is refund
able during the first two weeks of
each t.erm.For more informat.ion on how to
get. involved, or on a spec ific issne, v i ~ i t . OHT office. Wp Plrp locatr>rj
in room 123 of Ihe <'::"neral Services Comp lex , which is besidp the
Davi Compnter Research ('entre.
Our hours are Monday t.o Thursday,
10:00-4:30, and Friday 10:00-2 : 00.
Are you worried about the deteri
oration of the ozone layer, the silentdestruction of our lakes and forestsby acid rain, your rights as a tenant, or the lack of a campus widerecycling program? Have you often thought about doing something
about these problems but couldn't
find a way to get involved?
which will benefit both the C01 n 1- ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ _nity and the student. UW st.ndents
can learn the skills of public inter
est research while preparing research
for puhlicat.ions such as: "Acid Rain
the Silent Crisis," The Kitchener
Wat erloo Tenant's Guide, and A
Citizen's Guide to Excess Packaging
and Disposable Products. WPIRG
staff and volunt.eers also provide
a valuable consulting" service forstudents working on essays and as
signments on environmental or so
For more t.han 15 years t.he 'Water-1 Public Interest Research Group
(WPIRG) l].as provided an outlet for
concerned UW students to actively
work on a variety of envirorunent.al and social issues. T hrough ablend of research , education, and action, st udent.s can increase their unders tanding of the relationships between social and environmental issues while working for change.
cial issues.
WPIRG offers UW students valuable information. Unlike the university libraries, WPIRG has concentrated mainly on providing socialand env ironmental resources to the
University conullunity. We have an
ex tensive collection of books, files,and periodicals on a variety of topics
WPIRG's resource centre and reception desk are maintained by .st.udent volunteers. Time cOllullitmentsare flexible, ranging from one to several hours per week. Drop by our
office if you'd like to contribute to
these services.
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888-4054 REGISTRATION NO.1 398984
Scholarships Available
by Joanna WadeStudent Awards Office
The following awards are availahle
to engineering students who eat alltheir wheaties.
The Arthur Anderson Manage
ment Consulting Scholarship ismade up of two annual awards vaJ
ued at $400 each. They are given
t.o st.udents enter ing their 3A t.erm
in either the Faculty of Engineering or a Co-operative Mathematics
program. Selection of recipients willbe based on academic achievement,
~ c t . i v e participation/ leadership in
x t r a c u r r i c u l a r activities, ability to
'onmlUnicate and career ob jectives
of implementing change through the
Application Systems Development
and/or Manufacturing Process Imorovement. R elevant work-term ex-
The Bell Canada Sc1JOlarsIJip
perience will also be considered. Applications should be submitt.ed to
the Stud nt. Awards Offic(> <lIlTing
the 2B term. Applicat.ion d 'adlitH'is June 30, 1989.
The Bell Canada cholarship cover ; tuition for the final undcrgrnd
uate year plus an offer of SUJ11ll1 remployment. with BelJ Canacia, a1
though acceptance of employment isnot a condition of t.he Award. Th
awards are availab le to third Y('l\f
Engineering student who rank in
t.he t.op half of their class, hav an
int.erest in t e l e c O m l l n 1 J 1 i c a t i o l l ~ or rl?lat.ed fields and have been invol veein on-campus or communit.y adiv
it.ies. Application deadline is J u n ~30, 1989.
The Canada PackeTs Inc. R('-search Division Award is vRluec1 at
$800. It. is available to an under
graduate in Chemical Engineering
who has a high academic standing
during the first and second year and
is continuing in t hat program. Posi
tive evidence of leadership and contr ibution to university and/or com
munity life are also given strong consideration . Application deadline isJune 30, 1989.
To ettgineerlng students
who eat all their wh
The J.P Bickell Bursaries make
available a sum of money to Chem
ical Engineering st.udent.s of good
acadetnic standing who need finan cial assistance . The application
deadline is May 21, 1989.The B .P. Canada Bursaries are
two bursaries of $500 offered an
nually to two st.udents enrolled in
Earth Sciences , Engineering, Com- -m er ee or E conomi cs at. th e University of Waterloo. The application
deadline is May 31, 1989.The SUllcor Bursaries are offered
ruillually to student.s in Chemical or
M chanical EJlgin('('rin r whir h , in
lllppor t. of ('mplo,Yllwllt. t'qnily, willhe aWI\fc\(>(\ t.() wnnWll, f \ h o r i ~ i t l a l(nn.tiv(') Canadian:' , I ) ( r ~ ( ) n l with
disahi lit ies nnd visible minorities .
in Ih Stud,,,t A . ~Interested st1lr\C'nt.s sho ulcl npp l,Y on
t.he Universit.y of Wlit'rlno g< III ra lb u r ~ A . r y applicat ion and at I f\.ch n le t. ter indicating I heir eligibi li t.y for assistance fr01l1 this ROUfce. Applica
tion dendlin(' is Mny 31, 19R9.Application<; nrf' <tva il ab l > in the
St.udent Awards Office, 2nd floor,Ne dIes Hall .
Farah's Food Mart
In Store BakeryFresh Fruits and Vegetables
Deli CounterFull Line of Groceries
Man In Store Features
@1f)@f1i) 7 @@.W®fW®®rk
®@.1Ji1i) c 1] @.1Ji1i
886 - 9933Universit
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May 19, 1989 ron Warrior Page 11
STY ilm Seriesby SA jones
The Day the Universe Changed,
a film series from the fertile mind
and lively wit of British scholar
writ.er James Burke, will be scr eenedweekly at UW this spring, starting
11 May and running till 13 July.The screenings will take place each
Thursday in EL 101 from 11:30 a.m.
to 12:30 p.m.
other and contending that we're living today i n constant tension between new knowledge and inherently
conservative institutions and ritu
als .E r i ~ ) r 1 p t i t \ p ~ inrlllrlp: Tt st'lrtF'rl
with (he Greeks, Science revisesthe heavens, Dltrwin's revolution, and Changing knowledge,changing reality.
Any series by Burke is marked not
Series Breakdown • The Day the Universe Cbanged
Scientific Imagination in the RenaissancePrinting Transforms Knowledge
- Thursday May 25- Thursday June 1
Science Revises the Heavens - Thursday June 8Factory and Marketplace RevolutionSocial Impacts of new Medical KnowledgeDarwin's Revolution
- Thursday June 15
- Thursday June 22
- Thursday June 29New Physics: Newton Revisist.cdChanging Knowledge, Changing Reality
- Thursday July 6- Thursday July 13
The Organizer is Dr. Carl
Thompson of UW's department of
Civil Engineering. Co-sponsors ar ethe Centre for Society, Technologyand Values (CSTV), the Architecture Student.s AssoCiation, and Engineering Society A.
The Day the Universe Changed
will trace the development of Western thought through major trans
formations over the centuries, taking us to the rooms and ruins wherehistory has veered in new directions. Host James Burke willtry to show how we have become
thehigh-tech
statistically-modelledcomputer-oriented people we aretoday.
The one constant in knowledge ischange, says a promotional blurb
for the series, noting that modes
of thought tend to overthrow each
only by wit anrl scholarship but. by
feature- movie quality photography,
graphics, and dramat.izations- and
by numerous and varied film locations. Like Connections, the newseries was shot in many locations
more than 20 this t.ime, with t.be listincluding England, Sicily, Tunisia,
the United States, Monte Carlo,
Sierra Leone, Lapland, and NepaI.This series is the second of James
Burke's productions to get a high
profile on the UW campus. His pop
ular 1979 series, ConIlections, has
been screened several t.imes in pre
vious spring terms, at.tract.ing goodsized crowds even on the hottest.days. Th e new series is expected to
draw equally well.A program guide is available from
the CSTV office. Cltll UW ext..6215or st.op by the office (MC 4049).
Eng Soc presents ...................... .
on THURS. JUNE 22, 1989
6:00 11:00 pm
buses leave at 4: 15
TICKETS $35Includes Bus Transportation
and gourmet dinn'er
TICKETS GO ON SALE TUES. MAY 23
@ 11 :30 IN THE CPH FOYER
LI TrL-€, GU\( \ S ~ R E 1 1 " ( GoOl>
Toxic Coffee?
by Gunge
Food Services is under 'RCMP investigat.ion for the alleged dilution
of coffee with toxic waste. Food
Services representati ves deny anyknowledge of the t.oxic additive but
have hinted that Juan Valdez may
be involved in an international co ffee bean toxic waste disposal ring.Valdez was no.t available for comment but. his represent.atives said,
He's a simpl e guy. He just picksthe beans and hangs around in supermarkets wit.h his donkey.
Muffin Men
On The Moon
by Gunge
U of T astronomy professor
Seemore Schlunky has reported hissighting of Muffin-Like creatures on
the moon . Seemore has also studied their advanced system 'of reporduct.ion involving a large metal box,into which raw muffin iuaterials are
insert.ed and dozens of fresh muffinmen are removed. Skeptics suspect.his findings may be linked to t.he
MUUlunuffi.ns shop four blocks from
the observat.ory.
MOUNT UP, v ~ E € N 4 0 R N TH/\ '
'0 ' ' ' ' '5 YOI.>R-S
LL YOUR COPYING NEEDS
JUST DOWN THE STREET
• 6¢ a copy or less • Covers for reports
• Three-hole Drilling(wtlile. auto-fed. 8\0; Jl 11)
• CerIox Binding
• Many colors of paper • Many textures of paper
• 81;2 x o 11 x 17 sizes • Transparencies
• We send FAXes • Laminations
• • • and morel
RESUMESTypeset in a variety of typesty1es, copied onto your
choice of paper. Just bring us your (neatly )
handwritten resume and we do the restFirst come, first served)
Updates? Your resume is kept on disk and may
be updated any time.
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232 King Street North. Waterloo
near the comer ofKing & UniversUy, across from W U thletic Centre)
884-1071 • 885 .26798:00 a.m. - 6:00 p.m. Monday - Friday; 10:00 - 3:00 Saturday
Coupon Expires August 31 st, 1989
·
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May 19, 1989 Iron Warrior Page 7
Class Reps For All Seasonsby Debbie Gibson
Every term, classes go through
the motions of electing/ appointing/strong-arming people to be class
reps . However, the specific dutiesof class reps are i l l defined and are
usually passed from generation to
generation by word of mouth. Iam writing this article to give everclass an idea of what their class reps
SHOULD be doing. Class with agoau set of class reps always seem to
be t.he most spirited as a group and
always do well an event.s (especially
P**,I)'). For classes above 3A, it maybe difficult. to change your ways, but
you can try. For the younger classeshow ever , there is still time
Every Class should have . a fullcompliment of class reps. What you
ask, is a full compliment? Well, it issuggested that every class hav e the
following positions:
2 Eng Soc Reps
2 Academic Reps
1 Athletic Rep
1 Photo Rep
1 Treasurer
I know, I kn ow-most of you are
saying "Seven people 11 We haveeno ugh trouble just getting two Eng
Soc Reps " First. let. me explain
what. t.he duties of each position are,
t hen I l l suggest how you may want
t.o structure it. in your class.
Eng Soc R e p ~Yom Eng Soc reps uP the li nk be
tween your class and the Eng Socconncil. The specific dut.ies are asfollows:
• Attends all Eng Soc meetings
• Give the Council feedback as to
how happy or pissed off your
class is about Eng Soc events
and services
P**5by Wendy Bolf
and Jackie MorganWelcome back.
We 're your new P**5 direct.ors:Jackie and Wendy. P**5 (Paul
ancl Patricia Plununer Participation
Point.s) are present ly being t.abulated. We 've decidecl t.o put a lot. of
emphasis on participating in event.srat.her t.han winning. Another major difference t.hat you'll notice this
term is the value of P**5 allot
tecl to the events. We 're thinking
BIG The categories-major, minor,
special, sports, and miscellaneoushave been carefully broken down sothat each class can closely monitor
their standings. To be P**5 champs
has always been an honourable andprestigious title, not to mention the
pot.ential for upgrading resumes, impressing girls, missing classes, and
winning beeeeer
Here's what we've got so far:Major: These include event.s
such as Boat Racing, Poets Chal
lenge, Chariot. Race, etc. Events requiring team participat.ion, t alent (?)
and some semblance of organization.
Minor: These are spur of the moment events, mostly concent.ratedduring engineering week and weekend. They include individual as well
• Pick up and post. announce
ments put in the class boxes in
the Orifice
• Announces event dates and im
portant. Eng Soc issues
• Encouraging class to come outto events
• Make a class list at. the hegin
ning of the term and distribut.eto the class, with a copy sent to
the Eng Soc office.
• Organize class T-Shirt.s, Logos,etc (See Eng Soc Novelty director for help)
• Enjoy Milk & Cookies (if youdon't. know what these are,
come t.o a council mee ting )
AcademicYour Academic reps take care
of business between your class and
your professors and department.
Specifically, t.hey should do the foll o w i ~ g :
• Attempt to re-arrange your
schedule (i.e., move that 3:30Friday lecture )
• Arrange your midterm and finalexam elat.es and times
• A c l l 1 l j n i ~ t e r the lJ nwant Ad
forms and Course critiques
• Petition pr fe or to chan elab/assignment scheduling
• Submit copies of midterms and
finals t.o Eng Soc office
• Att.end Faculty fe dback sessions
• Enjoy Faculty sponsored dinners, wine and cheeses, etc.
Athletic Rep
Athletic rep duties include the following:
• Sign up class teams for Corec sports and Eng Soc tournaments
• Attend captains meetings
• Maint.ain the Class Athlet.icPoint Book (If you don't have
one, you should Talk to the
Athletic director i f you don't.rThe Eng Soc gives out Athlet.icLetters eac h term and every
sporting event you enter earns
your p o j n ~ s
Photo RepMany classes forget about Photo
reps until 4t.h year when you start.to do a Yearbook. Then you realize that. you have no photos of allthose m emorable class events. Eng
Soc has a filing cabinet in the Ori fice where classes can st.ore negatives
and photos. We also supply freeB&W film for class photographers.
f you can develop your own film,you can sign out a key to our darkroom. f you have no darkroom expf"rienc:e, O\1T photo director CRn in-struct. you. Specifically the photo
directors do t.he following:
, a e 1· at v r po ihl
time (e.g., Eng Week, class par
t.ies , last. exam, etc)
• Maintain the class archive ofphotos
• Submit.s cool pho1os 10 Iron
Warrior, Eng Soc Photo Con
t.est.s, Toront.o Sun, I-Ie ,
Gets Rollingas team events requiring litt.le prepa
ration. Example$: smarty t.ast etesting, sub eating, eJectric jello ..Special: Mega P**5. Scunts and
St.unts. These require particapa
t.ion, preparation and imaginat.ion .Stunt.s will be judged on originalit.y,so be creat.ive but rememb T .. don 't
do anything that cmi't he undone.
Sports: Sports.
Miscellaneous: All the rest. For
example, blood donat.ing, recycling,handing in exams for Orifice file s ...f you have anything to add to this ,
drop off a note in our mailbox (Ori
fice). We are open to aU ideas. Run
ning events are of course the major
source of P**5. Your Eng Soc com
Iluttee can only do so much to fillyour social calender. You've got to
take care of the details.Got an idea? Go with it. Remem
ber, we're rocks, we cannot be per
suaded, coaxed, bribed or coerced in
any way. Did we say ny way?? .Jackie and Wendy
P.S .: Dear Geo. and Camp Eng,
You haven't, been forgotten. In light
of your small class size and high per
cent of keeners we have allotted afudge factor.
This is the new and improved
PLUMMER equation:
Let. n = of e a m ~ parl.iripal ing
:1' = inal standing (x ic; positive,real)Pi c event: vMiabk (dep n d ~ on
categorips d scri heJ abuve)o :: . Pie _. 00
o :: organizal.ionaJ facl.ur (01.5 )
Part.icipating team :# P** ) (n3 I 1)* Pi,. (I)Organizers:
# P**5 - 1l",Pie*0 (2)
Clearly, form"la 2 shows increasp(lpoints for organizing as well as incentive for organizers t.o encourage
maximum pMticipat ion .
Fudge
Factor(F)
/Y= n (x)
l . O I - - - ~
Class size (CS)
TreasurerThe treasurer must not be some
one with large Visa debts The trea
surer takes care of the following:
• Collecting a class fufid ($5 or$10 usually)
• Doling out. money for Scunt Entry Fee, Boat Racing, Parties
• Check if your department gives .money for "class social events"
(EE dept. gives $50 / term )
So, t.hat is what all the class reps
should do . I know that this may be
news t.o many of you. f you wonder
why sOllie classes seem to be so orga
nized and always do so well in P**5,
it is probably because they had agood set. of class reps.
Now for the problem of how t.oget. your class properly "equipped"
with class reps . NO, you do not
need seven different people for the
jobs. Often, classes will hav e two
Class Reps that do both Eng Socand Academic Rep duties. The at.h letic rep and treasurer jobs are fairlyeasy and usually the same person
will do it. t.erm after teTln. As forphoto rep- you rpRlly shOlllrl find011(,11 As r f \ i r ahove, VOll will appreciate having one when it comes
t.o your graduate yearbookFinally, as a word of encourage
ment. , mos t class reps who hecome
involved wit.h Enp; Soc enjoy i.t so
much that they continue on to become Directors or to run for a position on ' the Exec. f you have
any more questions about class reps,
please talk to me or one of th(' eli
re (' t.urs . I f your ~ ' 1 dews t hi1\lI.<; to
tnHy diffcrent from how 1 c\cserilH'dit (nnel lik t' it, t.hat way), fill mc in.Happy clns I fl'ppillg '
Grad Photo
Bulletin
by Steve Robinson
Th class of 1990 <:rn.d Phot.odates arl' Mfly 2:3,24,25,20 and 29.Pleas(' sign lip as oon ns possibJ(> foryom appointment. Sign up is in Lfl<EngillPcring S()('icly oOice.
Thes( ' are the plwtoR of you that
will be nspd for t.he y(·arbook and
class composite for t.he clMs of 1990.See fh e d j s ~ ) J ~ y case by P.O.E.T.S.
for more iuformat iOIl. The sit.tingfee is $J 5.00. For this fee you receiveall your proofs, thp class composite
C\.nd yearhook phot.o.
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Page 8 Iron Warrior
CASI Now At aterloo
by Bruce Robinson
Last January, The University of
Waterloo became one of Canada's
first english speaking universities to
get a St.udent Branch of t.he Cana
dian Aeronautics and Space Insti t.ute (CASI).
CAST is a professional organiza
t.ion dedicated to t.he advancement.of aerospace / space t.echnologies and
t.hei r relat.ed app lications. CASI
memhership includes engineers sc i-·ent. ists, doctors, lawyers, geographers, computer scientist.s, teachers,
astronauts, as we ll as specialists in avariety of ot.her fields. While CA SI
is as much an industry associationas anyt.hing else, its emphasis ismore on the t.echnical develo})mentof the industry t.hen on it.s financial development . CASJ regularly
publishes two t.echnical journals and
frequently hos t. s sem.inars and conferences in cit.ies all across Ca nada.
Student regist.rat.ion for these conferences is generally onl y $15. CAS Imembers are involved in all kind sof research including such topics asm.icro gravi .y studies space ph ysiology, aeronaut.ics , remot.e sensing ,
art.ificial int.elligence, and materials, dards. However, with your support,
to name btl t a few. we can meet this challenge.The Waterloo branch's mandate This term, we have a great pro-
is to improve the awareness of the gram lined up. This includes several
Canadian Aerospace Industry and informative and int.eresting gnest
to promote aerospace research <l:t speakers as well as some fant ast.icWaterloo. There is presently no video events. Watch for our posters
coordination for people at Wat er- around campns for more in forma-
lao who are doing research in the tion on upcoming events. In addi-
aerospace and related technology ar- tion, watch for the biweekly CASI
pas. Many people are not even aware newsletter that ~ l l annOltnCe im-that th eir research is of value to the p o rt ant. accomp Jshlllents and up-Aerospace industry. CASIUW was comin g event s in t.he aerospace in-stnrted to change t.his situation. dustry. T he newsl \.t er wiP also
The University of Water- bring people up (.0 elate with events
100 branch of CASI was highly suc- right here in Wat.erloo, such as t.hecessful last 'te rm with their January next CAS J event. ,12 kick-off event featuring Canadian You might be wondering what
astronaut Bja.rni Tryggvason, who kind of support. CAST has. Well,discussed several m.icrogl'avit.y ex- t.he Wat.erloo branch has nine corpo-per iment.s. This event was followed rate sponsors as well as t.he support
of several faculties and depart ment sat Wat.prioo. Om 1 l l ~ jor sponsor is
COM DEV in Cambrid ge. They are
very helpfu l in bot.h organ izational
and finan ri al terms. The ot.her spon
sors are SPAR Aerospace, Canadair,
Dowty Aerospace, Te1esa:t Canada,
Air Canada, Prat t and Witney, the
Impact Group, and Canadian Astronautics Limited .
UW laid foundationfor future
aerospace research
l)y five o t.hers, including speeches byseveral Wat.erloo professors and the
showing of space relat.ed videos. The
UW branch also made many cont.acts within t.he ap.rospace industry
and laid th e foundati on for future research at. Wat.er loo. Last. term wasso successful t.hat it will be quite difficult. to meet the same high stan-
Membership in CASIUW is only$15 and this provides some real hen- .efit.s. First , you be come a junior
member in CASI and as such are
May 19, 1989
entitled to attend CASI conferencesand semina rs . You also receive asubscriptio n to t.he CASI Journal,
which is very interesting and usefulreading. In addit.ion, t.he Canadian
Space. Agency and COM DEV havesome very good undergraduate rese arch projects and would lik e Waterloo students to do them. These
projects are in a variet.y of fields and
make great. fourt.h year project.s towards degree requirements. Members will be able t.o advertise their
membership on there resum es whichcould prove quit.e helpful during
that traditional Wat.erloo Co-op job
hunt..We are .always look ing for people
t.o help and the re are plenty of things
t.o be done. f you would lik e t.o help,or would just like t.o join, leave amessage for us at. th e Engsoc officein CPR. f you are not sure if youwant to join CAS I, just come out to
any of our events and see what yout.hink. f you lik e what you see, wewill b e happy to sign you up . Unt.ilthen, have a grea t. term and we hopet.o see you soon.
RADARSAT: Canada's Eye In the Sky
by Erik Kerstenbeck
If th government does not talcefright at the high cos ts involvC d ,Cannda could SOOll he fl ying I heworld's most ad vnnce'cl remol ('sensing sa l ellit.e in t.il (' en rl y I D90s
HADARSAT will ca rry a s.yn
t het ic ap e rt.ure radar (SAR) to sen
('rate oblique-v iew images of the
Eart It '5 surface be l pa h il . Unlikeopt.ical sensors , such as thosl' carried
by Landsat or SPOT , HA DAUSAT
can pierce through clouds and flinction in darkness.
Synt.het.ic ap erture radar t.akes t.hedata from each scan and elec tron ically synthesizes t.he efrect whichwould be obtained if the antenna
ext.ended physically over the entire
distance travelled during the scan.Conventional radar image resolution
depends on the size of the aperture
(or antenna size). SAR processing
allows an antenna only a few IH<:.
t.ers in lengt.h to yield a resolution
equivalent t.o a conventional antenna
many t.imes as large.RADARSAT's SAR will be ahle
to resolve features on the Eart.h's
surface to 28m. Wit.h t.he exception of France's visible image sensor SPOT, this performance meets
or exceeds the capabilities of most.opt.ical sensors.
The primary use for SAR imageswill hp to monitor ice f o r m a l i o n ~ offCallada's coasts. Along with simply
reporting the presence of ice, it willbe ahle to discriminat. e bet. ween thin
first-year ice and thicker multi-year
ice. This would allow ships to choose
t.he path of least resist.ance to ram
their way through . Off shore drilling
plat.forms will receive information
on iceberg movement - an obvious
matt.er of concern . With SAR's
reso lnl ion , inrliviclual ships can ber cord ed, which will be valu able in
locnt ing dist f('ssed vessels or those
npp.rating illegally within Canada's
8xcl usive Economic Zone - a boon
t.o Ihe defense inrlu<;try.A sca \.l;erolll Ier on hoa rd will
prov id l' in format ion on wave act.iY-
ity , allowing windspf'ed and direction t.o he calculated to 10( 0 (speed)and 20 degrees (direction). The
sca t.t. eromet. er works by recording
th e manner in which t he radar signal
is scattered on reflection from t.hesea surface.
With SAR s resolution,individual s ips can b,,.,cord,d M boo to tM
4e/,,, ind.str,.
RADARSAT will also carry a payload of t.wo visible sensors and various infrared sensors. One of t.heseis a high resolut.ion (30111) elect.roopt.ic mu1t.ilinear · array (MOMS)
which will provide imagery similar
to that produced by Landsat, but
over a 417 km swat.h.The other sensor is a radiomet.er
which will "see" yellow /orfl.nge, red,
and into the infrared spect.rllm. The
resolut.ion of t.he radiomet.er much
coarser but will cover a much larger
swath (3000 kill) for each pass.MOMS will provide information
on vegetat.ion such as forests, crops,
and natural ground cover, whereas
the radiomet.er images yield dat.a on
sea-surface and dourl temperat 11rp s.
. Bping optic:. spnS0rs. t i l rnn 01llv
operat.e during dayli lS ht. allr\ I hincloud cover.
The cost of Ihe equipment (sat.elli te, la unch vehicle, Earth stations,
etc.) has been est.imfl.ted 10 be closet.o $8001'1 (FY86). It. is confidently
exp ec ted to earn $150M/ FY in imagery sales and benefits.
For "only" another $J40M , th esa telli te's lifet.ime can be douhled t.o
10 years by making it serviceableby NASA's Shuttle Orbiter . However, this depends on NASA having an Orbit.al Manoeuvering Syst em (space t.ng) by that. time , t.o
fet.ch RADARSAT from it.s 1000 km
orhit. to the low Eart.h orhit. of t.heShut.tle.
The Conservat.ive government.,anxious about. costs, called fora review of t.he program halfway
through the definit.ion and preliminary design phase of t.he pro ed..
Promoters of t.he project, wit.h an
ace up t.heir lab coat.s, have estimat.ed t.hat. the long term value to
Canada's advanced industries to he
close to $550M only five years after the proposed 1991 deployment.
Th.is, along with image dat.a sales,could well put t.he program into t.heprofit. COIUIlUl.
Canadian companies picked bySPAR Aerospace Ltd. (the prime
contractor) t.o be members of t.heRADARSAT team are Canadian
Ast.ronaut.ics, Canadian Marconi,
ComDev, DSMA-Act.on, Fleet 'In
dust.ries, SED Systems, and, of
course, Telesat. Canada, which. willbe named as the operanng agency.
The actual sat.ellit.e plat.form, or
bus, will most likely be an adap-
tation of t.he British Aerospace's
Olympus exp erimental conunUllI cahons satellite, which is due forlaunch in ea rly SU i l lnCr of 1989 .
The launch vehicle chosen will likely)e provided by France.s Arianespace
for launch at. its KOllr U spaceport
in French Glliana. I f BAe (Brit.ishAerospace) dr ops ont, alternn.t.ive
p l a t f o r m ~ such as Fa ir child's Leasecraft or RCA Astro's On1ll.iSt.ar may
he used. The choice of launch vehicle, however , seems to he fixedwit.h r i a n e ~ p a c e sin ('e SPAR has
eIlll)loyed their services throughout
most of the ANIK series communi
cat. ion sat.ellit.es .With t.he poo r reco rd of the Mul
roney government. nn past. space issues, it seems t.hat t.he RADAR.SATt.eam at. SPAR's Integration and
Test facilit.ies at. the David Florida
Laboratories in Ot.tawa will be safein hooking vacat.ions all t.hroughout1991 when deployment is due . They
might also consider a more penna
nent vacat.ion down sout.h or back
t.o Europe (from which most. of t.hemoriginate) where a more stable environment often exist.s.
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May 19, 1989 Iron Warrior Page 9
SPACENEWS Vol. 1, No.3.
EDITOR S COLUMN
Welcome to the third issue ofSPACENEWS, a bimonthly report on
space new s and technology for Canadianengineering students.
The purpose of the newsletter is to
provide a forum for students across Canada to share information on space relatedactivities. In this issue, there is an overview of the U of T SEDS group. There is
also a report on U of W s newly formed
CASI student branch.
I encourage sLudents, professors and
researchers to submit articles to share withothers. Below are some further low costreferences on space.
Enjoy
Yuri Quintana.Systems Design Eng. MaSc'89 (Waterloo)
Mars Anyone
Mission t Mars is an article by
Micheal Collins (former astronaut) on aflight scenario for Mars. It appeared in
National Geographic magazine in Nov.1988 . TIME magazine also has a scenariofor Mars in LtieJuly 18, 1988 issue.
TV Ontario on Space
TV Ontario is offering a comprehensive TV course on space. Programs clarifyhow we get into space and work there,
how we profit or lose, and what the spaceexperience means to us. The 400 pagecourse handbook The Space xperience
can be purchased for $20 by calling1-800-387-1952 ext.24 (in Toronto call231-4249 eXl.24).
In the Next Issue ...
An article on the Canadian Astronaut Pro-
gram
SI ACENEWS is a bimonthly C;madianIlUhlication on spac e news and terl1l1olol )'.Although every errort is nHlde to ('nsureaccuracy, SI ACENEWS is not responsihle forany inaccuracies or omissions. All materialreceived becomes property . of SI ACENEWS
lind the editor reserves the ri2ht to edit lindprint it. Opinions expressed in IIrticles are
those of the authors.Copyright 191UI hy Vuri Quintana.
All correspondence should he mailed toSI ACENEWS, 455 ncgency Crc.c;cent,Waterloo, Ontar io, Cana da, N2T t 1'2.Editor-in-Chief: Vuri QuintanaFaculty Editors: Ur. G.L. Greig (University orWaterloo), Ann Gawman (\11M Canada Ltd).
World NewsU.S.A.
NASA plans to have 7 shuttle missions in 1989 . Among them:
April - Magellan : A probe to
Venus that will map the planetsurface in detail.
October - Galilco : A spacecraftto Jupiter to study the planet'smoons and drop a probe into theatmosphere.
December - Hubble Space Telescope : One of the largest telescopes in the world will be put in
orbit to study the stars.
U.S.S.R.
The U.S.S.R. has lost contact with
Phobos I a spacecraft bound for Mars.An accidental command shut off the guidance sensor. As a result, the craft was
unable to orient the solar panels and the
craft lost power to operate. Phobos 2, a
second Soviet probe, has just reachedMars and will photogfaph the surface.
U. ofT. SEDSIn 1980, an ambitious MIT micro
biology student, Peter Diamandis wasfrustrated by the degeneration of the U.S.space program. After gaining support of
some of his peers on the MIT andPrinceton campuses, the Students for the
Exploration and Development of Space(SEDS) was born.
When an appeal was made in 1981
to students in a letter to the editor ofOMNI magazine, the SEDS office wasinundated with letters of support from
across the nation. One of the respondentswas a Canadian, Bob Richards, who suggested thaL the SEDS concept be expanded to encompass other countries. Theestablishment of SEDS Canada made it
the first international chapter of SEDS.
Dr. David C. Webb, World Chairman of the Unispace 82 (UN Confer
ence on Peaceful Uses of Outer Space)invited SEDS to make a presentation atthe upeoming conference in Vienna,Austria. The paper entitled "International Student Cooperation in Space" wasreceived with support from many people,including Arthur C. Clark.
The formative years of SEDS saw
the creation of a renowned AdvisoryBoard, an Alumni Board, a Space Scholarship Program, the Arthur C. ClarkAward for Space Education, affiliationswith other major space soci.eLies, conferences, symposiums, and the ongoingactivities of SEDS chapters.
In 1987, SEDS continues to growan evolve. Operating with a core of
about 35 Chapters in the United Stalesand Canada. SEDS constitutes a focusfor thousands of young people. futureleaders, who are determined to play asignificant role in pioneering the spacefronLier. '
A branch of SEDS is located at the
University of Toronto. They hold regular
meetings and have a newsletter. The alsoorganize lectures and trips to space con-
ferences.Reprinted with Permission From
SEDS Canada, Vol. I, No.1.
For more Information, c ~ t a c t U of T SEDS,
P.O. Box 159 Station A, Toronto, Ontario, M5W
IB2.
RADARSAT - Canada s View of the World
A Satellite for All Seasons
Canada is leading the developmentof RADARSAT, a sophi ticated satellitescheduled for launch in 1994.
RADARS AT will the most advancedsatellite of its kind. Its outstanding fea-
ture is a Synthetic Aperture Radar(SAR), a powerful microwave instrument that can transmit and receive sig
nals that sec through clouds and darkness. RADARSA T is a Canadian-Jed
project involving the United States, several provinces and the private sector.
From almost 800 kilometers abovethe earth, the satellite will circle the
globe from pole to pole, scanning the
entire surface in 500 kilometer-wideswaths and producing high resolutionimages of the earth's lands and oceans.The satellite will cover most of Canadaevery 72 hours, and the Arctic every 24
hours. Canada will have secure access to
it Processed and interpreted infonnationwill be available only a few hours after
RADARSA T passes over an area.
Canadian
Astronaut
Visits U .of W.
Canadian asuonaut B amiTryggvason was at Lhe University of
Waterloo on Jan 12, 1989, to address the
newly fonned U of W CASI (CanadianAeronautics and Space Institute) student
Canada s North
RADARSA T will be able to d teet
strengths and weakenesses in ice. It will
be invaluable in plotting the easiest courses for ships and icebreakers. The movement of ships and their tracks through
he ice can also be monilored by
RADARS AT. Daily surveillance of the
Arctic waters and islands will enhanceCanada's claim to Arctic sovereignty .
The Oceans
RADARSAT will be able O measure ocean winds and waves. This will
improve sea weather forcasts. The addedcapability to detect oil spills on all three
of our oceans will be particularly useful
as Canada moves toward exploitingenergy resources in the North.
Resource Management
This steteoscopic SAR imagerywill point out geological differences and
help identify potential mining sites.
branch. The purpose of he branch is to
establish a "space" presence on campus,
a presence which U of W has been lacking.
In his speech, Tryggvason encour
aged scientists and engineers to lake agreater responsibility in educating the
public and politicians as to Lhe importance of science and engineering. He
noled that most politicians are not technicians and this may be the reason why
RADARSAT will be able 1 make
r 'gular Observuliofls of lime dependentphcnollll'na such as rop growth. It will
also be able to monitor soil moisture and
plant conditions.
The Payoff
The economic bene[iLS will also be
subSllli1tial. The development and opera-
tion of this system is expected to generate 10,000 per. on yenrs of employment
in Canada and provide more lhan $) bil-lion in benefits to the Canadian privateand public sectors. Thus, Canadianindustry should be a leader in the world
market for radar data and services intothe 21 5t century - a market that is expected to account for 30 percent of worldwide space business by the year 2000.
Reprinted witb permission from the Canadian
Space Program.
I •
the country lack's a science policy.
The CASI branch is sponsored by agrant from COMDEV, a world leader in
the satellite communication systems. TheCASI student branch plans to hold aseries of lectures and activities at UW.
For more Inrormatlon OD the UW CASr branch,
write to CASI, do Englnerlng SocIety omce,CPH·1327, University f Waterloo, Water·
loo,Ontarlo.
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Page 1 ron Warrior May 19, 1989
Gentleman, Start Your ENGinesby Erik Kerstenbeck
The 1989 Formula SAE competition, hosted by the South Texas
Section of the Society of Automotive Engineers, will pit the designexpertise of 45 teams of Engineeringst.udents from across North America in a three day, head-t.o-headcompetition in San Antonio, Texas.This grueling three day event willbe held during May's traditional
TWO-FOUR weekend.
Th comp('tit.ion is similar to
other competitions such as t he
SAE MINI-BAJA off-road vehicle,SUPER FUELATHON, ;M SUNRAYCE USA, etc., all of which haveseen (or will see) exceptional entriesfrom the University of Waterloo.
The concept of this event is for
the student team to produce a vialllprotot.ype for evaluation as a r alproduct.ion vehicle. The int nded
market is the non -professional closetautocross racer. The vehicle lllustconform to ridged specs in t nm ofacceleration, braking, and handling(not t om nt ion cost, safet.y, maint ainahili t y and others). The designt.eam must. nlso considpr ergonom.icfnctors, ne:c;thet.irs , comfort nd havet his machine on t he llIarket, for lesst.han $[IS6000 (based on a production run of 1000 units) .
The FORMULA SAE entry fromWaterloo is not an r b s v i l l ~ trackterror This growling beast isa sophisticated integration of rawpnwer, Clprodynr\1nics, advanced SIIS
pension , and innovative el ctronic
fuel inject.ion sytems which propelthis light-weight machine at speedsexceeding t.hat. of any productioll ve-
hicle. With specs Ijke 0- 60mph in
I four seconds, this is not a car to giveGranny to replace her VW u -
she'd end up swallowing her dentures off the first light .
. ; When asked about this face-I peeling accelerat.ion, Elgin De
war (Fuel Injection/Hardware Development) nonchalantly remarked,
, "Yeah, it's pretty scary when the
,,- throt.tle sticks ' in the lot.," as he. tweaked yet more efficiency out of
his custom fuel injection system.
The car is powered by a 600 cc
Honda Hurricane 4 cylinder multivalve engine. But, with a Kevlar
venturi (limited by a 20 nun restrictor to protect the driver from breakneck speeds), this engine bears little
resemblance to the stock powerplant
of the street/ Honda CBR600 Hurri
cane.Beam.ing, Jouko Haapanen (En
gine, Steering/Driver Cont.rols) expounded on the virtues of the venturi/fuel injection system. With
only air going through the vent.mi , we have eliminated cath icingproblems which plague any non-fuelinjected design," The 1988 winning car (rom :ornell did not evenattempt fuel injection which is inherently IHore drivable, easier to
j,une and can squeeze out a (not-somodest) 80 HP from t he 600 cc engine. Cornell inst.ead resorted to
heating the venturi t o prevent ic
ing (a design kluge?), Waterloo's
entry makes a veritable mockery of
this bandage style of design through
sheer elf>gance.As anyone who at.tenrh'rl the f:ala
unveiling at FED HALL and s\lbsequent. dynamic testing in the
parking lot will attest, this machine
is LOUD (105 elBA max .). The
muffler was designed by Gary Wolfof Wolf Racing Products of Cambridge. This silencieux is designedto provide a fiat powerband to take
into account the variety of race conditions. Although a trifle of peak
power is lost by this tuned system,
it is a bonus for the tight. courset.hat has to be navigated in Texas.How was this critical system designed, Mr. Haapanen was asked.With a gleam in his eyes he whispered, This is a Black Art. Anyspies from Western (one of the other
Canadian entries) will garner no informat.ion from this Flying-Finn.
The streamlined body was devel
oped with assistance from Fiberglas
Canada Ltd. in Guelph. This hasresulted in a lower coefficient o( drag
(actually CD*Area) along with aweight reduction compared to last
year's ahuninum shell (fondly knownas the Tank).
As one of the categories of. the
competition is presentation, t.his design is sure to titillate the fashionconscious judges. It not only goesfast, it looks fast.
What is underneath the shell is amonocoque tube frame, independent
suspension with racing slicks, and
the DOHC 16 valve Honda engine.The chassis and suspension designsare the result of extensive finiteelement analysis which has led to
a dramatic decrease in weight compared to last year's tank. This isbased on Tom Huschilt's studies of
F0RMFLA 1 race cars.
The cars are judged and scored in
three categories: Static, Individual
Trial, and the Endurance Race, with
other cars on the track. The Static
events are concerned with overall design, manuiacturing costs, and the
formal presentation to the judges .Individual performance trials consist of straight-line acceleration, lat
eral acceleration on a skid pad,
and maneuverability. Endurance
events place four ot.her cars on a15 mile course with two heats after the qualifying round. GiovanniMilitano (Engine Development/Fuel
Injection Software), who was seentearing around the FED HALL lot,
feels confident that this car can
match or exceed any effort from Cornell, l st year's winner.
The Team Manager, Dirk Kroll(or, as he calls himself, The Official Mouthpiece ), says that t.he development cycle can be likened to
a sine wave of joy and depressionas milestones were achieved or bugs
encountered. By the smile on hisface during recent ' track testing it
seems that all is welJ for the 1989Texas event. As for beating the 8thplace finish of last year's entry, Kirk
pointed to the car burning the test
lot and gave the thumbs up-enough
said.
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Page 6 Iron Warrior May 19, 1989
Chern Eng Soc Is Ready For Action
by Cynthia Smart
"Our go?l is to ~ n h a n c e student
education in our department," said
Danny Yuen, Chairman of Chem
Eng Soc; ·in his usual off-hand· un :derstated manner. The .attendees
of the society's first meeting of the
term listened as he rattled off an impressive list of events scheduled forthe tprm .
Chem Eng Soc is planning tours
of the Brick Brewery, the Procterand Gamble plant in Hamilton, the
BF Goodrich PVC plant in Niagara -Falls , and a winery in t.he Niagara
Peninsula. A few of these tours willinclude fre e samples, some of which
will be mo re intoxicating than others.Ot.her t.rips in the works include
an outing to the annual Canadian
Society of Chemical En gineer s conference, to be held this fall in Hamil
ton. AU Chemical Engineering stu
dents are encouraged t.o att.end.
Socialby Eric Langford
T his sununer term promis es t.o bethe most fun-fil led and exc it.ing ever.I t started off with some barbeques
and a great turn out at the Welcome Back Pub in POETS. Road
Scholars won the recycle drive and
The Chemadians won the Engineering Feud, hot.h by very close mar
gins.
If you have not yet picked up your
Engineering Blotter, it 's free in the
Orifice and looking for a ho me On
it you'll find all the important da tesincluding when resumes are due and
when the first nautical is. Here is ashort list of some Engineering stuff
which is happening this SUllUller:
May 25-27 Eng. Weekend and Nautical IJune 22 Boat Cruze (a must)June 24 Nautical nJuly 4-9 Eng. week (Scunt, Pub etc.)July 9 Ring Road ClassicJuly 14 Blue Jays Road Trip (Skydome)
o·sG \ ~ £,\ .
A chemical engineering soiree, not
done in any recent SUllU11er, will
he scheduled. Last year's soireewas a success by everyone's stan
dards. Approximately 100 gradu
ate and undergraduate students at
tended, as well as 15 profs and 13indust.rial guest.s . This crowd took
co nt.rol of t.he Universit.y Cluh and
kept the hart.enders on t.heir feet allnight.. A much larger group of industrial guests are expected for t.hissunUller.
Anothpr unprp.cerlpnterl rrnjPrt isthe publishing of result.s from last.years survey of the two most recently graduated classes of UW
chemical engineers. This survey
will provide information on starting
salaries, joh duties and joh sat.isfaction. I t is designed to help the junior
st.udents focus their effort.s.Also in the wOIks is a c'ourse Stilll
mary Booklet, a collection of relevant formulas for chemical engineer
ing core courses from lA through
4B. The hooklet will serve as a refer-
Stuff
\¥e always need your help to or -nize and run these and other events.
I f you've got any ideas or want to
help, come to t he Orifice now , or
to the next Eng Soc meeting on
Wednesday May 24, everyone is welCOIl1.e and there's always free beerDen ise and Drew are the Special
Events dudes, Eric and Geoff are t.heSocial guys. See you there
747-9888
$3 00O
AN\, PIZlA OVER t 00
IE .c1u<l,ng S p e c ~ I ~
: - - - - oupon - - -
. $3°0O§ ~ f M © @ 1 P ~ f M O I M @ }
UNIVERSITY SHOP PLAZA: 747-9888
ANY PIZZA OVER 5900
IE.c1u<l.ng S p e c ~ I S )
- - - c ~ - - -
747 9888FREE DELIVERY , ,-
d 3°0C ; \ ~ ~ ~ Ot ANY PIZZA OVER t 00
(E.c1u<l,ng Spec' •S
747-9888
ence for student. both in school a.nd
.at work . The hooklet will be edit.ed
and puhlished thi pring . "Weneed people to assi t with the edit
ing of the booklet," says Mary Ellen
Perkin 4A ('hE, who ha started t.he
ambit.ious project. Tho e wishing toedit or participat.e in ot.her ways can
... ree samples some of
sign up at the Chem Eng Soc office
(El-2514).
The Chem t:ng Societyis
thetrW student chapter of the Cana
dian Society for Chemical Engineers
(CSChE), ~ n d is affiliat.ed with the
local Toront.o chapt.er. Thus, chemical engineering st.udents at. UW are
encouraged to attend events spon
sored hy t.his chapt.er . One such
event is a Chemical Engineering design competition, priz ed at. $1000.
Anot.her is the lunch get-together
feat.uring a speaker on indoor air
quality at the Hart. House at U. of
T. June 15.Says Yuen, "We will a lso con
t.inue t.o provide t.he same basic
services t.o Chem Eng studen t.s as
we have in the past." This involves t.he discount sa.le of unit con
version booklets, engineering paperand Perry' Chemical Engineering
Hanrlbnolc Tr:vlf' m : \ g a 7 i n p ~ FITI'
available for browsing. "uh yes,"added Yuell, "we'll' be throwing inat least. a barhecne t.his term per
haps in conjunction wit.h a Chem
Eng Softball tournament."
It is also hoped t.hat Chem Eng
Soc will be pro;yiding regular professional tax a.dvice t.o students via the
Iron Warrior.
Wit.h this busy schedule of events,
Chem Eng Soc continues to look forpeople to help out with the on-going
projects and new ideas for the Soc to
become more prominent. in its role to
enhance education.
ATTENT_ON
4th Year Students
It may seem like our Convocationis a long time from now, but the
Gradu.ation Committee will be getting
things off the ground this summer.
Grad. Comm. organizes the Yearbook,Eng. Ball, Iron Ring Stag, Grad. PledgeGrad. Gift (and much, much more )
The following positions must be filled:
• GRAD. COMM. CHAIRPERSON• YEARBOOK EDITOR• 1 Rep. from each 4th Year Class
Chemical CivilComputer Mechanical
/HELP .MAKE O U R G R A D U A T I O N' . P E C I A L GET IN-VOLVED
Speak with JAY GIBSON i f interested or i f youwould like more information about the positions
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12
Geoff Vona andEric Plamondon
Most times, the University of Wat.erloo is pretty easy to get along
with. As with other universities,we have our ugly bureaucratic side,but the bulk of engineers manage
t o sidestep most of the nightmares.
(Of course, its pretty hard to screwup CORE on a pre-registration
form). Sometimes, though, it seemsthat UW goes out of its way to be
difficult. That's what Eric Plamon
don would tell you anyway.Poor Eric is just a 4A Computer
Engineer who can't wait to get out
of here. His only crime is laziness;he's written only one work report infour work terms. During Novemberof last year, he pre-registered for 4Awith the rest of his classmates. Heselected two electrical courses, two
CS courses and a management science elective. All of his selectionswere fairly popular and not unusualin the least.
During the Winter 1989 workt.erm, Eric was informed that
his pre-registration was cancelled.When his coordinator came t o visithim during the work term, Eric
NEw
Iron Warrior
Registration Bluesa.sked what he should do. The coordinator said to have at least one
work report ready to hand in at t hedeadline and things will work out
fine.
On Ma y 1st, Eric filled out a preregist.ration form provided by t heElectrical Engineering Undergraduate Offke. He was told t o gpt signatures for entry into his CS courses,something he (and many of his classmates) obtained with no trouble.The form was then handed back to
the office.
On May 4th, a notice returned saying the pre-registration
was frozen because of work report credits. The EE Undergrad Office said to fill out another
pre- regist.rat.ion form and get anynon-Computer Engineering coursessigned by t he instrudor. Again Eric
did what he was told and returned
the form.On May 5th, Eric went to see the
Engineering Co-op guy (name has
been changed to protect the innocent), with his work report. ready
to hand in. He said that the second pre-registration form, filled out
the day before, was unnecessary.He took the work report and senta memo to the Registrar's Office
to unfreeze Eric's registration. Healso said the new schedule would be
printed over the weekend and wouldbe available on Monday May 8th.
When May 8th rolled around,
Eric's schedule was still not ready.He went to the Registrar's Office and
found out that the schedule wouldbe printed that. evening. The next
day, Eric picked up his first schedulefrom the EE Undergrad Office. Everything seemed to be in order, but
he noticed that his CS courses werenot scheduled. t seems that co-op unfroze his original pre- registration form, which did not allow C0111-
puter Engineering st.udents to register for CS courses. Eric then tookhis schedule and filled in his two CScourses using the normal drop /addprocec111Te .
ow Nar To P o<.A cJ - c JP Jol3:
By this time, Eric was gptting
a lit.tle ticked. He needed t o be
officially registered in his two (,S
courses in order t o obtain com put. raccoun ts. Wit.h assignment. due
dates coming IIp fast, Eric was hecoming more than a little paranoid.
Eric checked on May 10th for hisschedule, but t was not yet in. Almost all the other people who were
.
May 19, 1989
having problems similar to Eric's received their schedules on this date.
When he went to the Registrar's Office to find out what had happened,
he was told that there was a printer
problem and every second or thirdschedule s missed. That night, wehad to give Eric sedatives to keephim from killing his roonunates.
On Thursday May 11th, Eric's
second schedule arrived. This time,he had been given six courses (the
maximum course load is five). t
seems that Eric's original regist.ra
tion form was still around and hadbeen combined with a later form.Eric then dropped a course (one daybefore the drop/add deadline) and
went. home. The last time Eric wasseen he was very drunk and happy
that the nightmare had ended.
• • • • • • • • •
JI l TESRA1 E,P
C l l ~ U I T Te HtJ Y
o ST R e ] : ) \ J ~ ~fROb2.I\M
uS. MAR. · SION
D I ~ OVe,R - [Fe;
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May 19, 1989 Iron Warrior
by Erik Kerstenbeck
A voidislu is a "new age" philosophy designed to save modern
man frqm himself. The principle
of Avoidism is simple. An Avoidist
avoidsthings. He
avoidsbecause
Nonavoiding leads to Involvement ,and all of mankind's troubles have
grown out of Involvement .Descartes once said, "I think,
therefore I am." The Avoidist always says, "I won't, therefore I ain't
gonna."
Contemporary man is admittedly
heading nowhere fast. This has happened because man suffers from an
insatiable compulsion t.o prove himself as a unique and superior being.For instance, he goes to University
in order t.o make more money so that
he can surround himself with ma te
rials which his neighbors don't have ,
buys chic clothes to prove that he issexy, etc.
H seems obvious that. such attempts can only lead from anxiety,
t.hrough frustration and dismay , to
event.ual neurosis (by far the best
word in this article). And it's all unnecessary You see, Avoidism tells
us t.ha t. we are already superior bythe sheer virtue of belonging to the
species Homo Sapiens (if you do not
belong to this species, please writ.e,
stat.ing your name, address and faculty).
For f'x::\lllr1p. think how c>11pprior
you are to t.he conUllon clam. Let
us examine t.he differences between
man and clanl. I chose my goodhuddy Harry as a repr esentati ve ofa t.ypical man and found an excep
tional Nova Scotia clam. After an
exhaustive series of tests, the follow-
New Ageing table was compiled, exceeding all
my wildest hopes
Harry vs. Clam
Test Harry Clam
Motor Abiljty +12 +18Sense of Humor +40 +30I.Q . +97 +121Physical Attractiveness +3 +2Ability to Remain
UnderWater -53 +705Grooming <iO +60Taste With Horseradish +60 +60Ability to Keep Mouth
Shut +227 -55Integrity -91 +33Ping-Pong +300 -300Sexual Activity -4 +1
Political Influence -15 -705TOTALS +516 -30
These tests prove Harry 's superiority over the clam beyond
any question. (One uninvited observer,a Dr. Klaus von Kruschstat.ian, claimed that the differential
in Harry's favour was due entirely
to the inclusion of ping-pong in the
test, which he said was unfair. This
is destructive thinking and he should
he put away somewhere (or at least
have his tenure revoked). It is now
clear that any man is superior t.o any
COllunon clam and that any other
man is superior to Harry .
The Argument
Against AvoidismMany reacti r, bi iou , e -
ergetic Yuppie-types will tell you
that Avoidists are nothing but. slobs .
F I Q l : pf 'R c.W ED rv..E THO\):S
A V O ( D /N{
voidism
The Rebuttal To
The Argument
Against A voidismThIS j true .
How To BecomeAn Avoidist
This is not as easy as it. first.seems. Th e novice should pract.iceth e fundamental shown iII Figure
1 before even att empting Advanced
Avoidist Techniques .
Any new Avoirlist may, at times
find himself trapped int.o listeniJlg to
what is being sa id to him. The following rule should be rememhered
and obeyed at. all times : "t.he on lything an A voidist ever listens to isnothing." Frequently, though, youwill find it necessary t9 take certain steps t.o make sure t.hat there
is nothing for you not t.o listen to
(read t.his sentence twice- it makes
sense) .A voidist conversation should be
employed illunediately when anyone
in clines his / her torso towards you.The danger increases in direct pro portion to the cube of the sine of t.heangle of inclination (on a scale of 0
t.o 1) . Whenever this sort of danger
happens, you may Avoid by employing one of the seven tested remarks
which are of such extreme d u l l n e s ~t.hat. the avoidee will experience part i cerebr p a r a l y ~ i s ura ion ap
proximately four minutes) while try
ing t.o conjure a response .
Page 13
The Seven
Tested Remarks
] . A girl I used to go out. with inpublic school is an operator for the
telephone company.2. Tgot t.his pair of sock four years
ago in Sarnia for two bucks.3. I went. to bed at eight. last night
hut I didn't get to sleep until two.4. I didn 't hardly have not.hing t.o
eat. for lnnch today- just. a salad, pie
and a cuppa coffe .5. My second n phew will be eight
years old next month. You ought to
hear him talk.
6. I sure wish I hadda kept up withmy piano lessons when I was a kid.
7. r can t.ake l)pt t f'r pidHrf's with
my inst.amatic than I can wit h those
real expensive cameras.
I f ou practice these remarks, you
can Avoid almost anyone. Sometimes, however, a mentor is needed
to truly master the subtle art of
A voidis11l. Ment.ors can readily be
found during all times of university terms- be careful, though, theyare all Masters and Illay avoid your
attempts to solicit. their expertise.
The best way to harness their enormous talents is to employ the tried
and true lessons detailed above, butalways make sure to . . think I ' l l goto bed and mull this article over fora while ...
A) A V " , I ) ' ~ , ~ e A O I / I J 6 B) AV.":>I$-r t lO,NcS.-
~ L . . U I O ~ ASSI.J I ) - I£NT
c:) A V o ( ) S , A.rO,o,,,, . .
v J o A \ E ~ r F_I) HAI..1-
b ) ADVANCE > PO:5 , r I O N F=e>tZ.
~ T V r . . . IN&- <>IZ. I ) T I ~( , . t be"i"'n«ra)AL.C:ul..v:S TEX.'"
Gene Jackets
A recent breakthrough in genet. icengineering could reduce the costof jackets oy 40%, says Dr. Rita
Schubb of the UW jacket farm inGuelph.
At. t.he jacket farm, cows are hornnaturally wit.h the genes to produce
one set of lette ring and a university
crest. On e cow produces one jacket..Dr . Schuob has isolated t.he gene
responsible for this lettering . This
gene can be removed using the re-
strict ion endonucleus Hind Ill. Onceremoved, the gene can be duplicated
using a t.op secret prorednre. The
new gene, now twice as long, contains the information for two jacket.s. Dr. Schuhb showed this IWreporter several pilot cows, and t.heresults are t.riumphant. Several 93calves are sh owing clear signs of
growing two crests.
Expect price red uct ions to begin
in 1994.
\ J ~ O I H ~ l l A-12-E T e
G - ~ A - T E F V L D6A Q MD Wrl l
A-f t m V 1=0 LLO vv(rJ Cr M ~ ? tJ·
(",ot p « r ~ c ~ c ~ J . , t )
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Page 14 Iron Warrior May 19, 1989
Short Story: Tender
by Edmond Chow
What time is it? Michael turns
over in his bed and squints at hisdigital alarm clock: 2:18 only He
turns on his side, and snuggles comfortably into a corner. His senses
are numb, and he should fall asleepagain soon. In his mind, he recallsvaguely the argument with his par
ents the night before, and the anx
iousness of the next day, but luckily,his thoughts are random and don't
connect., and he quickly drifts again
to sleep. The room is so different. at night- shadows, no colours,peace and stillness. When the dawn
breaks, the little light from the
brightening sky will seep in throughthe sli ts in the blinds, not lighting
anyt.hing, but colouring things insipidly and morosely. Michael's fir
ing neurons still . miss in his littlehead- the birds' chirping seem both
distant and near, familiar and for eign: t.he first sense of realit y in
his dreamy state, beckoning him to
wake.
It's the sun, suddenly crashing
through the blinds once it hits
th e· right angle in the sky, draw
ing int.ense bright lin es across hisface .and pillow, that finally wakes
Michael up. As i frightened, Mor
pheus steals away, unlocking doors
in Michael's mind , letting gothe
truth of harsh realit.y: you're st.arting grll flp f('1lr in a npw tn
day; you fought with your pa rents last night over who will take
you to school. Ten years old, and
Michael wants to be ind ependent. -he doesn't want. to be seen wit.h
his parents at school, st.m a baby,
they talking to his new teacher
as if he wasn't there. So he
fought, raising his voice with his par
ents, talking back, stabbing, "Youdon't care You never care Youdon't understand me " into their
hearts. Michael knows he's wrong
and shouldn't do this, but with lossof control and pride, Michael doesthings he really doesn't want to do,or doesn't mean sometimes. They're
not speaking now, and his older
brother will walk him to school instead, so for now, he's won .
Michael had just moved into t.heneighbourhood two weeks ago. Not.
yet part of any of the groups of children playing outside in the street
until dark, he had spied on them
from his bedroom window on t.hesecond floor, his window hidden by
a branch of a large maple, already
losing some of its more crimson
coloured leaves. This first day of
school, he thought, is his chance to
make friends with some of the neighbourhood kids. (Michael had left
his friends nonchalantly two weeksbefore, understanding vaguely that
he would never see them again,
and if he did, only bumping into
them awkwardly at some supermar
ket, not really knowing what to say.)
This was his anxiousness, as well as
the new teachers and th e new books
and pencils . All that paraphernalia
which grew from year to year madehim feel impnrtant. w n p r ~ h i p M vpf>llril M \ nntph(')ok.
\Jicitad walks as f<lf \Wrl\· from
his brother as he can. kicking stones
along the way, kicking them again
as he cat.ches up to th em, some
times having to dart from side to
side to keep up, or sometimes losing the stones altogether. This way,he is distracted, forgetting about hisbrother, who is watching him, walk
ing beside him.
His brother has thought.s of hisown though, and, as brothers, they
have none of the closeness that
would at any time give him any real
concern over Michael. At the playground, they s t o p Michael loves the
playground - the wood and steel, at
treacherous heights and angles, and
On tlep at I t l m e ~ Mkhael
wisely thin1ca
the orange-coloured tub slides. Lit
tle kids are crawling over it, on fours,the brave ones on twos, littering it
like ants. Micha.el's brother thinks
himself too old for playgrounds, and
wants to leave, feeling embarrassed,
as if he was condescending him
self. Other than that, he likes the
fe eling t.hat he is the oldest onearound for quite a few feet-except
for the teachers and parents watching over their kids, of course, but
they don't cotmt . Michael runs and
deftly climbs up a rope net. t.o the
first level of the playground struc
t,ure. Although he is the new kid
in the neighbourhood, he has a cert.ain pride of his athletic abilitieson the playground. He's fam.iliar
with all the ways to get in and
out. and up and down- these play
grounds are all modular arrange
ments of the same thing- he thinks,
but. in more simpler words .
Michael notices that. most of the
kids are familiar with each othe r -
thi.:: l 1 1 n r n i n g ~ llrlvpnhlrp on thp
playground a t l l e r ~ cont.inuation of
last night's hide and seek, or SPID.
(The children have no prelim.inaries
when they see each other, no "Hello,
how are you, how was your sum
mer? and they even meet. people
they haven't seen since June as ithey had seen each other just yesterday. Michael doesn't think about
his until years later, when in highschool and university, when relation
ships are a bit closer, and people livea bit farther.) The ~ n l i l i a r i t y upsets
him a bit. Why don't t.hey introduce themselves to him? and sometimes he feels that eyes are looking
at him from behind. He thought it
would be different; he thought he
would know all these kids by now.
One step at a time, Michael wisely
thinks.
His parents served him hreakfast
without speaking a word this morn
ing. He just went to the table,
after getting up and washing hisface and brushing his teeth, just like
usual verything like usual, except
no speaking. His mom pushed toast
in front of him, not looking at him,
still bitter and upset at how herbaby could make her cry . Michael
knows she cares, but she's mean and
stubborn, and won't give in. He fid
geted wit.h his toast, to show that
he's upset too, and he's uncomfort.ahle, looking down in front. of him
on ly, not daring to look up."Leave me alone " to his brother.
Michael doesn't. really mean this ei
ther, but he can't really help it.
Subconsciously, he's dropping a bighint to his brother that he's up
set, and please be sorry and be un
derstanding. His hrntllPr thinks he
knnwi: w h ~ t h,,'s goillp.: thrnll '11. hIlt
he doesu·\. r e ~ p o l l d . Ht doesll . re
ally care, or h e doesn't know howto respond, even thnugh he wpnt.
through it too. At those times it
was Michael who, as a little child,
felt. the sting of the harsh words between loved ones. How could this
be happening? he thought then. t
was his world breaking up. · How
could they say such things? do suchthings? Later, everyone is tender
kisses and smiles, and being extra
nice. The pleasure of making up,
saying sorry, forgiving, and making
new plans, starting over again.
Michael climbs up a ladder to the
upper level of the playground, and
bravely stands up. There is roolll.for at most two or t.hree people up
there a small platform with a single encircling bar to keep peoplefrom falling off. The bar is at the
wrong height for Michael, so holding
onto it. is a bit awkward. Instead,
Michael leans against it, and looksaround: a clear horizon which makes
him notice things far away from him,
like the roofs of the houses around
t.he school, and not only t.he things
around him . Looking down , il. is
frightening, because of the height,
but Michael lives for the advent.ure,and t.his pride he is feeling. Pretty
good time, he thinks. There should
be a playground-climbing event at
t.he Olympics. He has dreamed that.
he is called on by some Canadian
Olympic Association to compete inthe event for Canada. He imagines
himself training on all sorts of playgrounds, and then finally setting a
world record at the Olympics, in
some very far away place, like China.
He would he a hero, and there wouldhe i \ rarllnp and thmlsands of ppnp)p
t.o greet him at the airport when he
got home .Michael looks clown again, amI re-
alizes the platform he is on is dan
gerous; a strong wind could blow
him off. Nevertheless, he stays up
there. Many of t.he younger kids
are slowly moving along the framework of the playground, amused
with the places their bodies can
t.ake them. Most of the older ones,
around the age of Michael, are noisier , running around, calling obscenenames , using words lea rned from
older brothers, hut too young to
really understarid the" words them
selves. Michael can swear too. He
used t.o get off really good ones,especially if he was mad at someone. He too didn't quite under
stand all t.he words, but his oppo
nent.s knew they were beaten when
one of Michael's was really long and
used many different swear words, or
maybe even rhymed a bit. He did
know from his older brother , how
ever, that AIDS was a terrible disease, much like the cooties.
Standing there, alone at t.he top,
the breeze hlowing all around him,
he's like a naked flag pole with noattachments. Standing by himself,
he knows he can disappear for. a
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May 19, 1989
Kissesfew days, live like the shopping-bag
ladies in the subways and old shopping malls, or even kill himself. No
one wonld care-he won't have t.otell anyone, and no one would notice. He has no responsibility, and
he is no one s responsibility . Alonein the world. No attachments. But
he won't kill hlmself, but. he wants
his parents to know t.hat. he is upset and w a n t ~ some freedom, maybe
12;0ing frlr :j<; hillin him,,,,lf if hp
duesll·t gd it. Ik c()II I 1 \1 :dl; Ihnt.railing over there. YOll ' re not ::\1-
lowed to do t.hat; it's dangPfol1S,and you could fall off and get killed.But if he did walk that railing , hisbrother would know that. he is npset,
and feeling reckless, and hopefully,he would tell his parents, bringing
them some concern. Maybe thenthey would realize that they werewrong and feel guilty, and apologizeand be nice, and let him do what hewant.s to do. -
What. does he want to do? A litt.le girl, maybe start,jng school forthe first time, is knocked down byone of the bigger boys. He runs
away, and leaves her crying, her loudand shrieking wails, ·obscene, bringing the hush, hush of her mother,
who picks her up, not. interest.ed in
revenge, but. only that she is not
hurt and that she would stop cryingand embarrassing her. The girl just
wails, and point.s t.o the boy running
away, too stressed to express herselfproperly, and wanting justice done,only occasionally mouthipg out, he
hit me, he hH. me: Michael wants
to be t.he hero, catching the boy running away, beat.ing him up a hit , and
then bringing him to the principal's.
The girl's mother would thank him,think him such a ~ e e t boy, and
spread the word, he imagining hermot.her in a small d e c o r a t i v ~ room ,sitt.ing up straight with other ladiesin their Sunday blazers, sipping tea.The girl would then fall in love with
him , of course, falling in bed together, and kissing, exp loring, and
Iron Warrior Page 15
and Smilessexual conque t.
Sill', silly, illy, he thinks. He'stoo far to catch the boy, but makes
a lllPntal not p ofhinl anvwav, in r 1 \ ~ phe bumps int 0 him on th e st reel .Silly, just like he imagine that
he's a computer "progranuuer the kind that makes the computer
games with all the real graphics and
sounds. He'd go into a computer
store, and he would nnderstand allthe big words that everybody's using, like XMODEM prot.ocol" and
"sixteen megahertz processor." The
man in t.he store would think t.hathe's just a little kid, and say, May
I help you?" and Michael will return
that audacity with hls computerese,
maybe catching him on some unfamiliar t.erms of the jargon.
The classroom walls are giant bulletin boards with coloured construction paper and cardboard stapled
ont.o it, the naked backdrop for creative students' work for t.he comingyear. Many of the boards are fadedin places, the sun having st.olenthe intensity of the colour around
large rectangles where a drawing or
project used to be. The desks, arranged in groups of six, and the longcolunms of fluorescent lights hanging from the ceiling, all seemed to
be dusty and untouched since the
beginning of sunUller. Michael findshis way to the ,desk farthest from the
teacher's: a solid st.eel thing, like hisdad's, but wit.h piles of textbooks
piled up on top. There are t.hreeother students sitting at desks already; Michael sHs down, like them,
and watches I.he other students comein, look around, excited.
In t.he hall , he sees I he girl inthe playground walk by. The wIlDIebusiness of girls, dating, and mar-
riage, however was all embarrass ing for him. During the nexi ~ 1 \ 1 1 l -111f r \ I r h : j , ~ r n r l , r r ;W tPT
will bel HUll ri l d. ..\11 I Ita( I\lidla,,1will know about it wiIJ he from the
rumour that he is f'mha rfllsspd tobe curious about, and the m.iraculous change.in her name. At recessesand in the halls, the entire next year,then, Michael consciou Iy shuns her,not knowing if she realizes that heknows she is married, and thus not
knowing how to talk 1.0 her . The
more self-assured ones would actually talk to her about her new husband, and t.heir honeymoon, as if
bly, sulks Michael. She comes to
school in a pretty pink dress, and
announces that sh will dance with
nll the guys in the class that day.She does, except for one: Michael,who was too upset at her, and athim elf, to dance with anyone. If
it was any consolation, Michael wasthe only one he did not dance with.But. just as the blonde girl does not
She lias a great timepretending affection ..getting tll em confused.
t hey were experts. Michael rOund realize Michael's feeling for her, shet. his too tactl ess. As for t.he girls is oblivious to t he fact th 'at he hasin his class, Michael will soon de- been missed. Thus, she has a great
velop crushes for them, particularly t.ime, running around, pretending
one, with blonde hair , and a l ll inia- affect.ion, or hitting them and teas-ture pair of spectacles propped on ing them, get.ting them confused.her nose. But the girls kept. to them- Later t.hat day, Ahmed, one of hisselves, usually, and it was only the classmates, will ask, Do you want
self- assured ones again, who were to be friends?" after they have been
able to talk to them without be- talking for a while. Innocent as it is,ing embarrassed. Whenever Michael the question comes to Michael like atried to talk to the girls, he would blow in the chest, surprising him sovery soon be lost for words, unless that he does not know how to an-he had them planned out before- swer. After a while, Michael real-hand . He would be so out of con- izes that Ahmed has been driven to
trol, that he naturaJly used a differ- say thi s because of his past friend-ent, hlgher pitched voice, when he lessness. He could imagine Ahmed's
spoke to them. I t would be a while mother suggesting to him that he be
before he could relax; for now, he nice, and talk to other people, and ..
envied the self-assured boys . ask t.hem to be his friend. Blunt,
Valentine's day was going to be a Michael thinks; tactless again.
big clay for him and his blonde girl, "No," Michael answers, not. reallythought Michael. There was o . . __ kn owin wlly. Ma. be ·ust to 5 )i t.f, be a Mce, and from what he had him, because of his tactlessness, or
heard, everybody would be ·standing maybe so that Ahmed will realizearound the sides, in camps of hays, that he is upset . But Michael is nowand camps of girls, and not danc- not too young to realize the impor-
ing, excep t for the self-assllrl'd onl'. , lal l l'(, of fri( IlIlq and falllilv : "Snrry,but only by Ihelllselvcs anyw,\y. ('or I Jllenn, V('s, 1',1 likl' In 1)(' f'riPIlfk"\.hree weeks b"fore Val'ntinc's day, And illl'fl tlt, · \· l' I I ' pl:II I i 'h
Michael gathered hi s cOllTag(' f;)r I.h(' pl 'l\ I: ' '' lIn./ , I I ,·1 1111\\ jilL foilll A.
deW whpn h(' conld a ~ k fit hlpl1ri,· few lrirks of fh Irnd ' . AI hom"gi rl to dance, bcillg til(' C{llll'lt· of t hnt ( v ( l I i l l ~ , f\lirhat·111Iak,.<; lip wif hthe day, wi1.h everybody looking al his parcnlfi, and n\ [paRt for 1.h(· JllO-
them . But .. on Valentine's day, t lH' IIl<'nl, c 1 i r f r t ~ Illlieh IllCJrf' of his ('11-
hlonde girl sudden ly /)CrullH' s I;elf· ('rgy (.t\WardR t IWIll , n il t ( ' I lr l( ' f kil-lsPS
assured, too llIuch to drillk proba- and smjJ(,R, nnd Iwing ('xtrn uicf'.
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