ThaT Freshman Friend…you used To like

mary venuto wrote this

oh, to be an underclassman again! when Natty Light was a delicacy and you didn’t take notice of the smell of feet in your dorm. to you, mighty freshman, musty socks were the delicious scent… of FreeDoM. Gone were the nights with 11 o’clock curfews and the days of a balanced diet. And naturally, as you stumbled along your first semester as an amateur adult, you met your initial freshmen crew.

Y’all were the four best friends that anyone could have; it was so totes adorbs. You guys would all coordinate your nights of sin by deciding who was going to be the responsible drunk that evening. And in the morning after you would all sit in Commons hung-over as hell and try to piece the night together. one of you always remembered the parts that someone else forgot. it was as if you guys were made for each other.

But flash forward a year or two and now there’s trouble in para-dise. it’s now your junior year and your liver doesn’t quite filter your blood as well as it used to. You’re a big kid now. You’re actually trying to make something of yourself -- and by making something of yourself we mean that you’re sober 4 days out of the week. For the most part your peer group is moving in the same direction as you, except one. the friend you made freshman year because you were immediately taken aback at their ability to make shot-gunning a beer look easy. You once admired them for their “Fuck it, it’s just an exam” attitude. Now you wished that they would leave you alone after the first time you tell them you have to study.

even when you do finally set aside the time to grab a drink with this friend, they still have the same alcohol tolerance they did freshman year. Despite your attempt to regulate, the night always just ends in chaos -- be it that they get into a fight with one of your other friends or just get stupid-freshman-drunk like the “good ole’ days” they keep lamenting about. with the passage of time you’ve come to realize that this anti-social behavior was never that cute, and is now especially aggravating because you’re out drinking in goddamn public. Nowadays our potential hook-ups are looking for maturity and sophistication in their random lays… and some old habits should just be left in the past.

it isn’t until you’re fighting with this friend to put his pants back on in a grungy bar bathroom that you realize that the passage of time has changed you two in entirely different ways. err, more like you’ve grown up and your friend has… regressed. when you first think about it your initial reaction is annoyance with a side of frustration, but once your friend goes home and you have some time and space to collect your thoughts you realize that this actually makes you sad. the good ole’ days have come and gone. is it time to say goodbye to this friend? (Editor’s note: yes.)

Luckily for you society accepts, even encourages, passive be-havior. All you have to do is avoid this person for another year or two. it only takes a few fake excuses to not be able to hang out until they even realize it’s time to move on. And if they’re rather attached to you, then do something that you know bugs them… like talk about future goals, dreams, or life in general.

You know, that whole “growing-up” trope.

• a college newspaper that’s actually about college •

The Black SheepFREE... likE thE gum you Found

undER youR dEsk in WhitE hall.

Volume 1, Issue 10 • 3/21/13 - 3/27/13 theblacksheeponline.com @UKBlackSheep

Staggering debt and crippling alcoholiSm? Welcome to the college racket!

WheelS Keep TUrnIng, TexTBooKS Keep BUrnIng

page 4

what'’s insideand by Strong We mean bribing With barrelS of cheeSe ballS.

Top 10: TIpS for fInIShIng The SemeSTer STrong

page 5

We Were SomeWhere near the bar… When the food luSt began to take hold.

fear and loaThIng In olIVe garden

page 9

page 4: from the streetsWhat Was the most epic thing about spring break?

page 5: how to properly lose an argument with your girlfriendLover spats are fundamentaLLy sex-deLayers, and reaL Winners knoW hoW to Lose.

page 10: Chlamydia attaCks pCB leaving hundreds of uk students itChy, unComfortaBleaLcohoL, hangover, chLamydia…Who are these peopLe, and Why do they insist on ruining spring break for us?

page 11: Bartender of the weekJade from movie tavern once saW a guy throW up doWn a girL's shirt. What have you ever done?

page 13: we interview: Caspianour chat With these post-rock massachusetts men, Who Just reLeased their fourth aLbum.

contentsTab

le of

Questions? Comments? Compliments? Insults? info@theblacksheeponline.com

page 11

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Shooting flames from your fingertips is the only responsible way to play with fire.

Pic of the Week!

word of the week

anacomical:any use of one’s body part

for humorous effect.“When Dave lit a fart that started Ryan’s hair on fire, it was anacomical to the second degree, as

were Ryan’s burns.”

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FroM The STreeTSGot a question you want us to ask?

FTS@theblacksheeponline.com

What was the most epic thing about spring break?

"mtv filming my hotel and gettin' buck at the clubs." - Katie H., Junior

"the parties on the beach and everyone earning beads!"

- John H., Freshman

"everything that happened in the hot tub in pCB...." - Jillian B., Sophomore

“earning” a college education was once a pleasant cross to bear. University enrollment meant that your future was bright—you were ahead of the curve, so to speak. i often get the sense that my generation is expected to cede to this appeal; a removed idea that going to college is reason enough to be happy we weren’t born in a developing nation. As a cynic, i am inclined to disagree with that expectation. if a college education felt less like a mortgage-backed security, there may be some merit to the opportunity, but national student averages are approaching $27,000/student. that makes a college education worth a newly financed Chevrolet Camaro with optional features. we feel it should mean at least a little more than that.

we can muster up a wide range of complaints about modern education, but most noteworthy is the inherent risk of buying one, altogether. we’re entrepreneurial folk here at The Black Sheep and we can spot well-informed risk when we see it. A baccalaureate degree is about as secure as sending cash to a san Juan investment firm. You can read all the pamphlets and let your emotions teem with excitement, but you’re far more likely to lose your ass in the exchange than to walk away in the green. the same can be said for a $30,000 degree; it’s not just a gamble, but a shaky one at best. there’s no guarantee you’ll get a good rate when the banksters come rapping at your door. even worse, there’s no promise that someone will want you. As a consolation prize, the university will hire you at half your pay grade with a complimentary office to sulk in. occasionally they’ll ask you for money to build sporting structures.

suppose students are willing to take the risk and turn a blind eye to the possibility that our overpriced educations do not promise a career; we’ve still got to account for the unnecessary levels of stress experienced by college students. Losing sleep, sacrificing health to turn in tedious assignments, and dealing with overzealous professors are just a few of the realities we wake up to everyday. there’s nothing more frustrating than a pedantic schmuck of a professor pacing back and forth in front of a class of too many students, expecting them all to care about the material, and show an engaged interest. then the all-nighters start becoming routine for said professor and

bitterness becomes a constant state. Cracking a half-smile becomes a foreign thought. Life becomes a dark room filled with unrealistic expectations at the hands of self-important educators who cannot relinquish the ludicrous belief that 19th-century english romantic author Mary shelley is somehow still significant in 2013. it all begets unbelievable amounts of anxiety and stress- yet we’re still expected to view a college education as the most sensible investment of mind, body, treasure and spirit we can make. we can almost hear them saying “…just sit back and take it.”

early 20-somethings are a young and hardy folk, so we can bear the tension. But dammit, we’re not going to like it. we’re going to connect with the idea that college life is punishing, and lash-out in bitterness. As a coping mechanism, we have turned to the bottle for decades. the catharsis of alcohol has become ubiquitous in college life. As a means of tuning-out the anxieties of risk and limitless stresses, we drink ourselves into stupors that rival those of a Viking raid. Admittedly it’s a cheap fix. But our society encourages the practice and there are no shortage of advertisers to sell us on the drinking life. sure—drinking can be avoided—but only with imaginably arduous efforts. since we’re already overextended by stress, we hardly possess more than a strand of resistance against the corporate marketers selling the one thing we need: a relaxing release.

the reality of college education is very different from the crazed, responsibility-free fantasy cultivated by hollywood. those of us who are concerned with our lives and want to do great things suffer unimaginable pressures for most of our waking hours. Note that i didn’t even mention the students who have to work to support themselves on top of going to class, the students who have to commute long distances to make it to class, the robotic staff that we have to navigate every day, the stress put on our relationships at the hands of university demands, unforgiving amounts of additional costs with few amenities included in the already exorbitant tuition rates, and on and on. As business folk, we see a select few reaping the benefits of our combined frustrations—we see one hell of a lop-sided deal being made.

Wheels Keep Turning, TexTbooKs Keep burning:

The racKeT of modern college enrollmenT

g. Jordan Johnson wrote this

the black Sheep mobile | for iphone & android pagE 5

we hope that couch of yours is comfortable, because tonight’s slumber will reside on its cushions. Men have the insatiable appetite for winning arguments with their significant other, but a victorious celebration often leads to a night full of regret and unseen emotional collateral.

theory: even when we think we’ve won an argument, we haven’t. Men are led to believe the crying we hear after a fierce exchange means victory, but this belief is a common misconception—women cry after an argument only to recharge their emotional battery and better prepare for an intense counterattack. when the war has already been won, the meaningless battles that ensue are nothing but a fast track to the dog-house, and therefore, a well-scripted dive is the only logical option.

materials:- First, confirm that you do, in fact, have a girlfriend. Although arguing with random women on the street can be entertaining, it is frowned upon in most communities and can lead to legal issues (or a swift kick to the groin).

- Attire is a vital in the beginning stages of the encounter. Make sure to wear something you know she hates, and therefore, can bring up to better her argument.

Example: “…and you let yourself go! You wear that STUPID jersey your brother bought you every day!”

- Any items or evidence that can be used against you in the heat of an argument.

Example: “Wait… Is that the ELECTRIC BILL I told you to pay two weeks ago?!”

what to say: in order to maximize the probability of a loss, be sure to inject the following lines at various times during the

encounter:

- “well i didn’t KNow that, okay?”- “i guess i didn’t think of it like that…”- “how was i supposed to know that?” (Can also include: “Now i can see why you’re upset.”)- “i wouldn’t have done it if i knew you’d be this angry.”

Please Note: Never, under any circumstances use the following statements; your girlfriend will be able to identify an intentional surrender, which may result in ruthless attacks on your wellbeing.

- “You’re right babe, i’m sorry.”- “You’re always right about this kind of stuff…”

warning:- Do not engage in argumentative behavior near/around sharp objects or open flame, this may result in bodily harm or death. - refrain from bringing your girlfriend’s family life to the discussion table, this also may result in bodily harm or death.- UNDer No CirCUMstANCes ask about your girlfriend’s menstrual cycle, this wiLL result bodily harm then death.

troubleshootingproblem: No matter what vulgar things i say and how offensive i act towards her, she continues to apologize and refuses to accept the notion that she is right.

solution: Your argument needs to be specially constructed to press certain buttons of hers. it is not necessarily the vulgarity of what you say or act, but rather the material of your argument that will instigate her to believe you are the wrong one. try bringing up sensitive subjects such as previous girlfriends, her weight, how you want to spend more time hanging out with your friends, or her lack of common sense.

how to ProPerly lose an argUmenT WITh YoUr gIrlfrIend

tBs staff wrote this

The

Top 10

tBs staff wrote this

Tips For Finishing The Semester Strong

Spring break is over and it’s time to start locking down those C-pluses and B-minuses. Does this mean it’s the end of the party? Hell no! We’ve got tips to keep you partying and still be successful.

10.) do your homework drunk: some French professors tell their students to have a glass of wine before they come in for an exam, because apparently it makes them more confi-dent. so go pick up a few 40s of confidence and drink until those Fs turn into As.

9.) sell all of your books right away: You hAVe to beat the end-of-semester crowds at the bookstore. in fact, just sell them before exams. this will not only save you time later on, it will also give you money for pizza, coffee, and Adderall.

8.) avoid class study sessions: remember those dudes who showed up only once for class? well, turns out they, shockingly, didn’t learn jack squat. Going to a study session means you’ll be stuck trying to figure out a semester's worth of curriculum with these slack-ers, so it’s best to not go. instead, try going to the bars your professors go to. Nothing says “i’d like some special consideration” like buying your professor a shot.

7.) party as much as possible: exercise does the body and mind good, and everyone knows how much of a sweat you can break when getting your groove on downtown. Make sure to drink plenty of fluids too, like beer! it's got plenty of carbohydrates to power your brain and the water it kind of contains will keep you hydrated.

6.) take acid: You need an extra creative boost for your papers, and Mr. Unicorn and his sunshine Band sure do have some crazy awesome ideas for your paper on medieval stud-ies. You might even get to interview a dragon!

5.) Bribe your professor: this one is serious business. if you haven’t already, keep an eye out for what your professor likes and doesn’t like, then make sure you get it in bulk. Noth-ing says “i’d love an A++” like 36 barrels of cheese balls or a crate of knockoff ray-Bans.

4.) host a ByoB study group: Although you should avoid these, hosting an exclusive group of all those nerds who went to class every day will boost your grade. Get your fellow scholars drunk, and they’ll throw all kinds of helpful information your way. what, you didn’t know that Massachusetts was conquered by spain in 1492?

3.) eat walnuts: walnuts are supposed to be a super food for the brain, so we suggest an all-walnut diet. walnut shakes, walnut hot dogs, walnut burgers, walnut milk; even if you’re allergic, it’ll pay off in the end when your brain has more rAM than an iBM supercomputer. Also, try eating rAM.

2.) play video games: You need to keep your mind stimulated, so why not keep your brain working by beating the brains out of someone else? we recommend anything with gore, chainsaws, or bunnies.

1.) Cry: this is usually the first thing anyone does when there’s an impossible test on the horizon, so start your morning fresh with some all-natural salt flavored eye drops.

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(View and Send Pics from our iPhone & Android App! Search black sheep mobile)send your party pics to pics@theblacksheeponline.com

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Live Team Trivia at 8pm

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we were somewhere near the bar, at the edge of the restaurant, when the food lust began to take hold.

i was shoveling my fifth meatball into my mouth, when the room began to spin. i remember saying something like, “i’m stuffed. Are you going to eat that?”

suddenly, there was a crash and a waiter carrying a tray filled with our half-eaten dishes tumbled to the ground due to the sheer weight of our refuse. i decided to take inventory of our present delicacies.Laid before us like a gleaming city of sultry herbs, noodles, and meats were two plates of bruschetta, thirty-five sautéed four-cheese shrimp, two sheets of lasagna, three empty parmesan cheese shakers, and a whole spread of edibles rich in carbohydrates, stewed meats, boiled noodles, steaming soups, and bottomless breadsticks, and salad. of these last two—we simply could not run out. As God as our witness, we had tried.

we also had a bottle of chardonnay, an empty bottle of pinot grigio, and a broken bottle of merlot. Not that we needed all of that for the meal, but once you start an olive Garden binge, the tendency is to push it as far as you can. the only thing that really worried me was the breadsticks. there is nothing in the world more helpless, irresponsible, and depraved than a man in the depths of a breadstick binge.

At that moment a waiter walked up and asked how we were doing. i leapt up, sat him down next to me, and began to recount the tale of how the man sitting across from me had come to this country from the depths of sacred Mexico to find an education in the great wilderness of Kentucky. i looked at this man, this server of men, and asked if he was prejudice before offering him a breadstick. he confusedly took the breadstick and walked off with it. i knew he wouldn’t eat it, the thieving bastard. i missed him already. he smelled like marinara sauce and olive oil, although that scent could have merely been my upper lip.

i dove into my chicken parmesan with furious gusto, wanting only to eat and to forget the sounds of laughter, smooth piano music, and my comrade asking how we were going to pay for this. he simply didn’t understand that this was more than a meal—it was a salute to the success of italian Americans, entrepreneurs, and high-end restaurants for the collegiate masses. it was a battle in the ever-growing

war against anorexia, public image, and the stingy assholes living within their means.

i prepared to down some merlot, but instead reached for the chardonnay to preserve what little class had managed to cling to us through this never-ending orgy of chow. sipping delicately, i then released a belch that could’ve shaken the walls of Valhalla, had we been Norse. of course, we weren’t Norse; we were broke.the server returned, still holding the breadstick. i knew the question he would ask. he was terrified though, for he knew the answer had to be, and would always be yes. his mouth opened slowly, and the phrase, “Did we save room for dessert?” left his lips like a au jus soaked lamb thrown into the lions’ den.

Knowing that even looking at the dessert menu would send us both into another food lust from which none could return, i closed my eyes and feverishly ordered myself tiramisu with a piece of chocolate mousse cake for my Mexican friend. the waiter audibly thanked God before dashing away from the table like a frightened house cat.

it was now that we began the world-ending debate of how to pay for the feast. My Mexican friend insisted that i pay since it was my idea to dine at this last bastion of affordable fine italian, but i countered, remarking that it was i who paid when we had gone to Chili’s. this dance of course was meaningless, a ritual that would end in the two of us casually walking out the door of this place, then making a mad dash across the parking lot to the honda, leaving a message written in breadsticks on the table: ioU.

fear and loathing in olIVe garden

tBs staff wrote this

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pagE 10 theblackSheeponline.com

Police in Panama City Beach, Florida, have confirmed an at-tack on the large group of students there for spring break by the infamous criminal Chlamydia. Little is known about the so-called “burning bandit,” other than he prefers to strike where masses of horny coeds have gathered.

official reports put the number of Kentucky students affected by the attacks in the hundreds, as Panama City Beach is a prime spring break locale for many students. officer stuart Pinkman, a PCB police officer, spoke with The Black Sheep via telephone. “every spring it’s the same story. we try to prepare for this guy, but it’s like we can never catch him, although everyone else seems to. we’re not sure why he targets places where undergrads are drunk and away from home, it just seems to be a part of his M.o.”

officer Pinkman continued, “Luckily, Chlamydia seems to be an in-and-out perp. he comes in, strikes a couple hundred people, and is gone a week or two later. it’s insane. it’s like he gives them just enough time to regret last week’s decisions, then he disappears. we want to assure the public that we’re doing everything we can to catch him.”

stacy, a freshman at Kentucky who wished to be identified by a pseudonym, recounts her harrowing experience during the attack. “we were just drinking a lot ya’ know. Like, tons. i got a really badass fake so i could get into all the good bars. Guys were just throwing drinks at me, it was so cray, i don’t really

remember what happened the whole time we were there, but it was such an AwesoMe trip. then, i get back to class this week and my whole downstairs situation is acting up. i was like wtF.”

stacy continued, “Apparently i had been attacked by that asshole Chlamydia and had no idea. i don’t understand how he got me, i was blacked out the whole time i was in PCB and only slept with, like, eight guys, i think.”

Jonathan, an Kentucky student also going by a pseudonym for this story, related an attack by Chlamydia, and also sus-pected accomplices. “the night started pretty tame. i was having a few drinks to get my confidence up to dance with a girl who was about a 7. You don’t want to start too high, that’s a quick way to crash and burn. Anyway, i start danc-ing with her and talking and we hit it off. Next thing i knew, i had Alcohol whispering in my ear to take her outside to my buddy’s car. ‘he won’t mind,’ he said. ‘he’s a total bro; you’d do it for him!’”

Jonathan continued, “so me and this chick had a really ro-mantic first date in the back of his honda Accord. everything was great, but apparently somewhere in those passionate five minutes, Chlamydia struck. Now, today, it hurts to pee and i can’t even have the lights on in my room because of that bastard hangover. My life is irreparably changed for the next 48 hours, when these drugs run their course.”

PCB Police are investigating Alcohol and the notorious hang-over as accomplices to Chlamydia in his weeklong crime spree. officer Pinkman commented, “it seems that Alcohol likes to set up the attack from Chlamydia. Most of these stu-dents are unsuspecting of him, but they do expect hangover, who seems to show up constantly. we’re using every resource available to track down these sick bastards and bring them to justice.”

Kentucky student health services issued a statement to the student body advising those that may have fallen victim to this attacker. the statement was published on their website and reads, “Due to the high volume of victims in this recent attack, the student health Center will be handing out anti-biotics at the student Union from 10-2 every day this week to ensure all students are free from the burning sensation of regret.”

chlamYdIa aTTacKS pcB leaving hundreds of uK students itchy, uncomfortable

tBs staff wrote this

no CoVER!

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the drInkIng gAme:March MadneSS

download our app For all oF our drinking gaMeS!

It’s that glorious time of year again, the NCAA College Basketball Tournament. It’s all anyone will be talking about for the next couple weeks, so you might as well get drunk enough to not cringe at the throaty gurgling of Dickie V’s voice.

what you’ll need: Beer, eyeballs, a television number of players: the more (who bring beer) the merrier!intoxication level: it's a slam dunk.

how to play:take one drink - For every “official” reference of a field of "68 teams"- For every Buffalo wild wings commercial- For every 60 Minutes commercial- every time Dickie V. says something incredibly predictable on esPN- every floor slap

take two drinks- For every ol’ fashioned college-hustle play- when the higher seed goes up by ten- For every Craig sager appearance- every time a school’s band sadly attempts a pop song- when Marv Albert makes basketball seem poetically absurd

Finish your drink- For every upset- For every correct pick in your bracket- when you realize you’re watching trutV long after the games have finished- For every buzzer-beater- Before the guy you owe a lot of money to breaks your legs

the game ends when: the games end, dummy.

reCIPe for dISASter:nuTella cool whip popSicleS

We’re sick of winter and its iron-fisted, anti-popsicle policies. Just because it’s cold outside doesn’t mean we shouldn’t be able to make it cold inside our mouths! What better way to make winter go away by denying its existence and eating a frozen treat?

what you’ll need: Cool whip, Nutella, milk, blender, and one of those popsicle-makers (though an ice cube tray would work in a pinch).

Cook freeze time: 3 hoursfatty factor: Just tell yourself eating Cool whip and Nutella in popsicle form isn’t as bad as sneaking spoonfuls of each at 3 in the morning.

let’s get Baked:to make three popsicles:- Put 1 cup Cool whip, ½ cup milk, and 3 tbsp. Nutella into a blender- Blend- Pour gooey goodness into popsicle molds/ice cube tray/shot glasses- DoN’t pour gooey goodness into your mouth, you impatient fat ass- Freeze for a few hours- eat all three in one sitting

It doesn’t have to be summer out to enjoy fro-zen treats, just like it doesn’t have to be the weekend to be drunk at 11 a.m.

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Jade w. movie Tavernhometown:  Clarion, PA

how long have you bartended: 2 years

what made you want to bartend: it seemed fun and the tips sounded nice

is bartending your favorite job you’ve ever had: Yes

has bartending taught you any life lessons: Control your alcohol intake

is bartending difficult: Not too bad, just a lot of memorization

favorite part of bartending: watching people interact with each other

worst thing you’ve ever seen at the bar: some guy threw up down a girl’s shirt

favorite drink to make: Applesauce

what drink do you order at a bar: tequila sunrise

if you could share a drink with anyone who’d it be: J Cole

what’s your hangover cure: white rice with soy sauce and apple juice

what’s your favorite pickup line you’ve heard at the bar: No comment

what do bartenders know that the rest of us don’t: Nothing

bartender of the week

Ncaa bracket

selection bracketit's bracket season, and with it, all the insane ways millions of people make irrational decisions in hopes of eking out a few extra tax-free bucks. well, not to get too meta, but we've decided to release our bracket on bracket selection processes. which methods are most and least effective? hint: Cuteness of animals has no correlation on basketball success.

This week we had an opportunity to catch up with Erin Burke-Morgan, guitarist for post-rock monolith Caspian. These Massachusetts instrumentalists released their fourth album, waking season, in 2012, and are currently touring the United States to support it. We talked… well, we talked about that album, and touring in support of it.

the Black sheep: you guys are touring right now, where are you?erin Burke-Moran: we’re in Portland, oregon.

tBs: when you tour, do you have the opportunity to take in the sights?erin: You know what, on this tour it’s not so much sights. in the United states the drives are so long, the four or five days we have off are driving days. we went to a place called Voodoo Doughnuts today.

tBs: they have a bunch of wacky doughnuts, right?erin: Yeah, i had some crazy mango-filled doughnut. And that’s kind of cool, it balances out not being able to see anything.

tBs: since you’ve been on tour, we're sure you’re tired. what does fatigue mean for a band? are you mentally exhausted? physically?erin: we all have our routines before going on stage every night. we have a stretch routine we go through each night, and that puts you in the music mindset. But yeah, i think the lack of sleep, in and out of reality, makes performing easier. At one point you’re in this wacked out zone in a van, then it’s like, stage time, and you know it’s time to perform.

tBs: what’s your pre-show routine?erin: Listen to some music, have a brew, and i do my stretches for twenty minutes before we play. i’ll catch the last song of the band performing before us, then it’s go time.

tBs: is the stretching a precautionary measure, or in response to an injury?erin: (laughs) i’ve actually hurt myself a couple of times. i’m not old, but i’m getting older, you know? in 2010 we were in the middle of a tour and i swear to god, i gave myself whiplash. (laughs) it was hard playing two more weeks with an injured neck.

tBs: how long does it take you to hit your stride on tour?erin: it’s usually a week or so before you really get into a zone. once we get there we try to stick with it. of course you get tired. we were over in europe last summer, and some of the craziest shows were at the end of the tour, and you have to stay up for those.

tBs: what are you most looking forward to when you get back from tour?erin: i mean, just having dinner with my girlfriend. i’ve been with her for three years now, so it’s tough getting away.

tBs: what do you go for when you’re recording music?erin: it’s different for every record. on Waking Season we were going for an ambient sound. About three quarters of the way through it we looked back and realized, “wow, a lot of these songs are similar.” that’s when you know it’s natural. Now we’re performing it live and decid-ing what’s next.

tBs: a running theme in music, what is that a result of?erin: our method usually involves someone getting an idea for a melody or a chord progres-sion or a skeleton of a song. we’ll get together and jam on it. we just record ideas or practice sessions on an iPhone, then build from there.

tBs: are there ever heated arguments regarding music, or is it mostly eye rolls?erin: it goes back and forth. there’s days where we’re looking at the floor, not being able to stand looking at each other. there’s other times when everyone just needs to step outside and smoke a cigarette. one thing that was great about Waking Season we got past inhibitions and insecurities, and found ways to communicate.

tBs: do you pay attention to criticism or acclaim from music press?erin: i think we like to say we make music for each other; that we play what we’re happy with. the more we do this, the more we learn we can’t make everyone happy. to some degree you have to write for your fans, what’s been important to us is making music we can vibe with. re-sponse from friends, interestingly enough, is when listening to Waking Season they’d uncover new stuff and it’d settle in with them. that’s a great response.

tBs: But do you go, “yeah! Spin gave us a nine!” or “motherfucker, why did you give us a three?”erin: (laughs) i mean, you read the reviews. it’s always funny to see what people say. it’s also just…part of the whole thing.

tBs: what’s some music you’re into that your bandmates say, “man, i can’t believe you listen to this garbage.”? erin: (laughs) Not so much anymore, but i started playing guitar at fifteen, and some of my favorite bands were Live and Bush. Bandmates would give me such a hard time about that. Nowadays, i’m always trying to get them to play weird chords, and they won’t do it. that’s kind of the beauty about writing in a band, collectively coming to decisions.

the big threencaa March MadneSSMarch 21st - 24ththere's nothing quite like celebrating the end of winter hiberna-tion than by getting mad during the month of March and binge-watching basketball in your living room. have your brackets handy, your refrigerator stocked, and your comfiest party pants on, be-cause you're going to be glued to the tV for four straight days. Good luck trying to go to class.

entertainment-y things to keep your eye out for.

The STrokeS - coMedown MachineouT March 26thAcclaimed indie rockers the strokes are back with their fifth studio album, Comedown Machine. suckily off of a mediocre 2011 album, sexy Juilan Casablancas and the rest of the bros say that this album returns to the sound from their classic first album is This It. Be sure to check out the album's single, "All the time."

wavveS - aFraid oF heighTSouT March 26thGoofy and perpetually stoned Nathan williams, the head honcho behind surfer noise/rock band wavves, has managed to remain rel-evant since his 2008 debut. Despite multiple band line-up chang-es, wavves is cruising along at full force with the release of Afraid of Heights. their fourth studio also includes two cameos by Jenny Lewis of rilo Kiley fame, which is all one needs to say for us to pay attention.

we interview: caspian

the riddle do you know whAt we’re tryIng to SAy here?Send the question and the answer to classtime@theblacksheeponline.comIf you’re right, you’ll win something cool, like a sprinkled donut!

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1) swear word2) Synonym for big3) plural body part4) Verb5) synonym for drunk6) MTV show7) intense rapper8) Slutty male celebrity9) whorish girl you know10) Girly drink11) liquor12) Popular bar13) party drug

14) Hot exotic location15) synonym for big16) Body part17) famous chef18) Typical drunk food19) mtv character20) Bar from #1221) liquid22) Food from #1723) wild animal24) Indie band25) food from #1726) Cocktail

the madlib: hUngoVer aT The gYmoh my ___1___, why am i here? i am sort of glad my bitch of a roommate is dragging my ___2___ ___3___ here to ___4___ on the ellip-tical, but only because i’m still kind of ___5___.

All right, i’m going to try the treadmill first, get the hardest one out of the way. hopefully ___6___ is on, it’s the perfect thing to stare at mindlessly. okay, got my earbuds in, blast-ing ___7___ so loud i hope i knock this tiny Asian next to me off her machine. First minute done -- i’m not doing too shabby! except my head is pounding like ___8___ would pound ___9___ after a roofied ___10___ or two, so maybe i’ll just run a mile. Maybe i’ll walk the last half. God, the Asian is giving me the stink eye, maybe because i’m sweating out all the ___11___ from last night and smell like the floor of ___12___. You know what, screw this.

i’ll try the elliptical, at least it’ll make the bouncing of my head more subtle. Lord, why do all these girls look perfect while i’m sweat-

ing and shaky like i took a bunch of ___13___ in ___14___. whatever, i can do this! Perfect, a machine open next to the ___15___ girl so i can feel better about myself. Damn, she makes Kim Kardashian’s ___16___ look small. okay, of course she’s watching ___17___ make ___18___, what the hell! Just focus on ___19___ getting drunk and making bad decision, wow, i’m not really as bad as them. sure, i danced on ___20___ bar last night and slipped on a pile of ___21___ but at least i didn’t get ar-rested! that ___22___ looks so good my stom-ach is growling like a ___23___ . i can’t do this.

okay i see my roommate, i’m gonna motion that i’m going to just chill out on the bike until she’s done. i’m going to cool down, put on some ___24___ and just mellow out and…

…. i cannot believe i feel asleep on the bike. thank God my roommate is ready to leave, i need ___25___ AsAP and maybe a ___26___ .