Lessons Learned from a

27 Year Recovery WalkMichele Alexander Bibby

Who Am I• 51 year LWBIA• 27 years managing my Bipolar Disorder• Married for 27 years, recently widowed• Parent of 2 children• 5 years of experience parenting a child

with a mental health diagnosis• I am the EVIDENCE

My Story• About Me• Only child• College graduate• Mom, 2 kids• Diagnosed while in Law School• Medication Compliant for many years• 20 plus year successful career in Human Resources• Pregnancy, age 40 … hormonal shift

More About Me• Change in medication• Four years of seasonal cycling,

• 4 summers of crisis hospitalizations• 2 inpatient commitments

• Inability to work• Acceptance of the illness

More about me• Education about bipolar disorder• Re-claiming my life• Giving back

• Volunteering, DBSA support groups

• Telling my story for the 1st time 2007• Trained as a certified peer specialist

More About Me• Worked part-time as CPS at Austin

State Hospital (previous patient)• Worked full-time as a consultant with

Via Hope• Worked myself off disability• Grief of recent loss• Supporting children through their loss

Recovery• I believe recovery is a process, not a

destination. My recovery journey has spanned 27 years

• SAMHSA working definition of recovery. A process of change through which individuals improve their health and wellness, live a self- directed life, and strive to reach their full potential.

Childhood Experiences Matter

• Childhood trauma leaves scars• Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACE) Study –

CDC and Kaiser Permanente, www.acestudy.org• ACE study says the more adverse experiences

in childhood, the greater likelihood for struggling in adulthood

• Childhood experiences can be a critical starting point of reference for counseling therapy

Sick children ….. Sick families

• Emotionally distressed children are the outcome of sick family systems

• In my case, after my diagnosis I began a journey of 27 years of counseling therapy

• No one in my family participated in or received any type of therapy

• I believe if you give counseling to a child from a distressed family and the child begins to improve, the benefits are diminished when they are returned to a sick family dynamic

When The Illness Shows Up Matters

• In my case, I was in Law School• The later the onset of the illness, the more a

person is likely to have accomplished• We must acknowledge the difficulty children

and adolescents have when they are diagnosed so early

• Childhood and adolescent diagnoses can impair the potential a person’s life may hold

Dreams Deferred• As MH Consumers we have life goals

and we have dreams• Does the dreaded “D” – diagnosis

mean the death of our dreams?

Impact of Race on Diagnosis

• The vestiges of slavery have left a legacy of anger in our community

• Anger should not result in a diagnosis• Being black male should not increase the

likelihood for special education or diagnoses• We have to be very discerning about the

labels put on us, on members of our community and our children

MH Service Trauma• MH consumer diagnosed in the 1980’s, I

experienced• Straight Jackets• Rubber Isolation Rooms• Mistreatment when you are the most

vulnerable

• There is a problem in our society when a person has to recover from the “therapeutic” services they received

Fear, Blame and Shame

• In my family, no one wanted to acknowledge any presence of mental illness in the family. There appeared to be a lot of fear related to my diagnosis

• Different sides of the family were blamed• No one wanted to talk about the illness,

consequently I felt a lot of shame• We have to open up the dialogue in our families

to normalize the conversations about the presence of mental health issues in our families

Language Matters• Crazy• Odd• Troubled• Mental Health Consumer• Distressed

Medication Compliance

• I was blessed in that the first med I was prescribed was the right med

• I learned early on that the medication management was key to managing my symptoms

• Many consumers are not so fortunate and spend years trying to find the right cocktail

• Years of productivity can be lost spent adjusting and changing meds

• This is compounded for children and adolescents with constantly changing brains

Disability• In 2002, I had a baby and had to

change a med I had been taking for 20 years

• I began seasonal cycling• I had 4 summers in crisis. Four

hospitalizations • I had to reorder my life• Disability was a life saving option

Acceptance• Once on disability, I came to terms

with my illness• I accepted that I had an illness that

had to be managed and could become unmanageable

• Being on disability afforded me the poor treatment many MH consumers experience everyday

Self Awareness• During a hospitalization at ASH, I was

exposed to Mary Ellen Copelands Wellness Recovery Action Program (WRAP)

• WRAP allowed me insight that has become critical in managing my illness. I now know how to gage• Early warning signs• Signs that things are breaking down• What are my triggers• Who are my supporters

Support System• As a MH consumer, having a circle of

caring, loving people is key• A loving support system ensures you

are not isolated• Having a supportive and loving family

has been one of my success strategies

Relationships Matter• We are meant to be in relationship one to

another• My greatest desire is to be engaged in

healthy relationships with positive people• Sometimes we do and say things in crisis

that can strain or damage relationships• I believe just as we can work on our

recovery, we can work to recover relationships when they are worthwhile

Peer Support• There is nothing like the mutuality of a

relationship between people with lived experience

• DBSA tag line, “We’ve been there, we can help”

• I became a certified peer specialist. This is a career opportunity for MH consumers

• The authenticity of relating and sharing that PS provide in clinical settings is incomparable

Wonderfully Made• People living with mental illness are extra sensitive

and I believe a little extra human• We are especially sensitive to light, season, hurt

and pain (our own and others)• We can relate• Perhaps MH consumers are “extra” human• There is a lot of pain and darkness in this world• MH consumers are uniquely equipped to detect

and support the distress of others

Shift of FocusIllness to Wellness

• What you focus on you give power to• I began to focus on the things I do to stay well• These are my wellness strategies

• Meds• Heart Healthy Diet• Exercise • Healthy Relationships• Spirituality• Under committing• African American Therapist• Wicked smart Psychiatrist• Integration of physical and mental health care

Giving Back• I learned that Giving Back is also a key wellness

strategy for me• I learned to be a support group facilitator with DBSA.

I became DBSA chapter President• It has been said to those whom much is given, much

is required. So, I have moved my efforts to advocacy• MLK said “Injustice Anywhere is a Threat to Justice

Everywhere”• There is still a lot of injustice that plays itself out with

MH consumers on many different system levels

Adaptability

Priorities Change• Career • Family• Managing the Illness• Maintaining Wellness• Me• Advocacy

Resilience is Key

Face of Resilience

Face of Resilience

Face of Resilience

Re-Invent Yourself

Failure Is a Part of Growth

• Failure can actually put you on the path to the next great chapter in your life

• Recovery is non-linear. The non-linearity of it includes dead ends and detours

• The key is staying on the path

Life Throws Curve Balls

• Emotional Distress• Situational Distress

• Catastrophic Events• Death/Loss• Chronic Illness

• Key is overcoming

Fully Recovered• Decision Making

• Major Social Supports

• Social Role / Identity

• Role of Medication

• Emotional Intelligence

• Global Assessment of Functioning (GAF)

• Sense of Self

My Responsibility• My words, actions• Be a loving parent• Maintaining my own wellness• Continuing education about mental health

matters• Supporting & inspiring my peers. Informing

folks about mental health issues from a consumer perspective

Resources• Books

• Visible Darkness, William Styron• Unquiet Mind, Kay Redfield Jemison• Brilliant Madness, Patti Duke

• Via Hope, www.viahope.org. Certified Peer Specialist training and certification• Wellness Recovery Action Plan (WRAP), Mary Ellen Copeland,

www.mentalhealthrecovery.com• Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACE Study)• FacingUs, www.facingus.org - Wellness Tracker• Depression Bipolar Support Alliance, DBSA. www.dbsalliance.org - Support

Groups and other resources• SAMHSA Working Definition of Recovery.

http://store.samhsa.gov/product/SAMHSA-s-Working-Definition-of-Recovery/PEP12-RECDEF

• National Empowerment Center, ECPR Training, www.power2u.org

Summary