lifes a bicycle presentation to capa feb 2017
TRANSCRIPT
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Life’s A BicycleYou Can
Balance Your Life
Just Like You Balance A Bike!
Academy of Creative Living
Sharon M. BarnesTherapist For Sensitive and Gifted
MSSW – Masters of Science in Social Work, SDSU
LCSW – Licensed Clinical Social Worker, ColoradoLocal Counseling/Psychotherapy
Online Distance ConsultationPresentations, PlayShops & Retreats
Professional Development
I provide Jungian-oriented depth work to help you: Release your Creativity Heal your Past Transform your Pain Become Fully Alive Find & Fulfill your True Purpose
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Life’s A Bicycle
Thanks, CAPA!
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Life’s A Bicycle
HTTPS://DELIVR.COM/2W8A7
You can Find the Complete Presentation Here:
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Life’s a BicycleEvery time You RIDE a bike or even SEE one, I invite you to Remember —To Balance Your LIFEJust Like You Balance a BIKE All You have to do, is:
Tune In
Tune Up Take off
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Maybe you can relate . . .
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Do you -Feel overwhelmed with too many demands on your time & energy?Suffer from Compassion Fatigue – caring for everyone else before yourself?Feel frazzled from being tugged in too many directions at once? Feel stressed?
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Would You Like toGET and STAY balanced Thrive AND Reach your goalsBecome STRONG and FLEXIBLE Build on body-mind skills you ALREADY have
Go BACK to Kindergarten for some FUN!
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Why?Life = Stress (Holmes Rahe)
Stress can make you sick= Life can make you sick?–It did to my husband Gary (1989) –It did to me (1990)
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Who?Who gets the most negative impact from stress? CASIGYs™!
Creative, Curious, Complex
Acutely Aware
Super-Sensitive
Intense, Intelligent, Introverted and/or
Gifted
YOU?
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
What you’ll learn -THE MOST COMMON SINGLE MISTAKE HOW TO CORRECT IT3 WAYS TO CHECK FOR THE SOURCE OF TROUBLE WHAT NOT TO DO2 QUICK AND EASY THINGS 3 KEY LIFE BALANCE SKILLS
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Life’s A Bicycle
Can You Ride A Bike?
What was it like to master the skill of riding your bike?
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
How’s Your Ride?Smooth?Bumpy?Got a flat?Anyone run into any bumps today? Last week? Last month?
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How Balancing Your Life is Like Balancing a Bike!
• Both are Mind-body skills• Both require Dynamic--not static--balance
Dynamic Balanceo Accommodates shifts in body, mind & emotionso Responds to changes in weather & traffico Flexes when the road or path varieso Adjusts to continual movement
©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Life’s A BicycleYou Can
Balance Your Life
Just Like You Balance A Bike!
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
3 KEY Life Balance Skills
1. Tune in2. Tune up3. Take off
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
3 KEY Life Balance Skills
1.Tune in
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Tune InMost Common Single Mistake–Ignore itHow to Correct It–Tune In
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What I don’t know can’t hurt me!
©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
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©2016 Sharon M Barnes, MSSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Barriers to Feeling Our Emotions
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©2016 Sharon M Barnes, MSSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
1. DON’T FEEL!oDon't feel sadoDon't feel madoDon't feel bad oDon't feel too glad/happyoDon’t feel __________
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So We Stuff our EmotionsThe Result?
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©2016 Sharon M Barnes, MSSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.comEmotional
Volcanoes
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Emotional Floods
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©2016 Sharon M Barnes, MSSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Have You Had This at Home or School?
Emotional Icebergs
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Emotions are like Ocean Waveso natural phenomenono energyo don’t ask permissiono respond to the weather, moon & earth’s movemento Our 1st reaction is to o When we fight them, o Learn to READ themo Learn to RIDE them
FIGHT THEMWE LOSE
stay SAFEhave FUN
©2016 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC. www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
3 KEY Life Balance Skills
1.Tune in
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Signs of Bike ImbalanceWobblySlow downFallWork harder???
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Signs of Life ImbalanceIrritability/over-reactions
Anxiety/Depression
Fatigue
Inability to concentrate
Dis-ease
Sleep disruption/changes
Appetite/eating/weight changes
Overwhelming emotions
Life crisis or chaos
Decreased or Increased sex drive
Increased in mistakes or accidents
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Imbalance [ StressShort Term Effects of Stress
Increased concentration
Increased endorphins block pain
Second wind
Increased fuel & oxygen
Increased energy & strength
Decreased allergic reactions
Blood diverted to muscles
Digestion slows/stops
Blood sugar drops or raises
Decreased sex drive
Increased white & red blood cells
Faster blood clotting
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Imbalance [StressLong Term Effects of Stress
Increased error rate
Decreased endorphins/ increased sensitivity to pain
Weight changes
Shaky nerves
Intolerance to heat or cold
Impaired immune system
Increased chance of high blood pressure, heart attack, stroke, and aneurysms
Blood sugar drops or raises turn into Diabetes & hypoglycemia
Increased damage to lungs from air pollution & smoke
Increased digestive problems
Increased fatty deposits
Decreased sex drive, increased sexual dysfunction
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Prime Times for CASIGY™Imbalances to Occur
Leg-lifting experiences
Marriage
Divorce
Change of job
Change of residence
Change of family size
Life transitions
Hunger, fatigue, boredom
Illness
Death
Loss of Job
Financial difficulties
In abnormal circumstances, abnormal feelings are normal (Bryan)
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Signs of Life ImbalanceIrritability/over-reactions
Anxiety/Depression
Fatigue
Inability to concentrate
Dis-ease
Sleep disruption/changes
Appetite/eating/weight changes
Overwhelming emotions
Life crisis or chaos
Decreased or Increased sex drive
Increased in mistakes or accidents
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
3 4 Ways to Findthe Source of Trouble
1. Stop2. Look3. Listen4. Feel
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
What do you find when you stop, look, listen?
Pandora’s Box containedo Shadowo Evilo Monsters
oHope
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
What do you find when you stop, look, listen?How are you feeling today?
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Here’s Some
Daily Dynamite!
o What’s happening?o How am I feeling
o Physicallyo Emotionally
o What color flag is flying on my inner beach?
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©2016 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC. www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
3. What SIZE is this Wave of Emotion? How strong or fast is it?
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GREEN Flag = Small waves = ALL CLEARYELLOW Flag = Medium waves = CAUTIONRED Flag = Big waves = DANGERBLACK Flag = Tsunami = GET OFF THE BEACHPURPLE Flag = Something’s in the water = BEWARE
What Color Flag is flying on Your Inner Beach?©2016 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC.
www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Here’s Some
Daily Dynamite!
o What’s happening?o How am I feeling
o Physicallyo Emotionally
o What color flag is flying on my inner beach?
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
We all have Caterpillar Days
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
3 KEY Life Balance Skills
2.Tune up
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Tune UpThe Art of Bicycle Maintenance
HOW to Tune Up:CheckCleanLubricateAdjustReplace or RepairRepair Shop
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Tune UpThe Art of Bicycle MaintenanceWe Resist Tune Ups
Time$Pandora’s boxTake care of others first???
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Tune UpThe Art of Bicycle MaintenanceWhy Tune Up?
Smoother rideLess effort (Abe Lincoln)More pleasant rideCare for yourself so you CAN care for others
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Flight Attendants’ Secret Formula
Put on your own oxygen mask first– BUT we’re supposed to love
others first! WRONG!– Love your neighbor AS
YOURSELF• Your love for others is limited
by ….. YOUR CAPACITY TO LOVE YOURSELF!
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We’re Afraid the Dam will BURST
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To save the dam, open a flue
HOW? Release your emotions • in small amounts• often
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Why Release Emotions?
All body cells have memory, not just the brainToo much pressure in a pressure cooker make an explosionToo much tire pressure causes blow outsWhat you feel, you can heal (Gray)What you resist, persistsChaos allowed to progress leads to orderPositive disintegration leads to a higher level of development
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Why Release Emotions?
All body cells have memory, not just the brainToo much pressure in a pressure cooker makes for an explosionToo much tire pressure causes blow outsChaos allowed to progress leads to orderPositive disintegration leads to a higher level of development (Dabrowski)
What you feel, you can heal (Gray)
What you resist, persists
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Catch & Release
You have to CATCH IT
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Catch & Release
before you can
RELEASE IT!
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Catch & Release
Let’s DO it!
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
3 4 More Things CASIGYs™ Can DO to Restore Balance1. Breathe (8-4-7) x 42. Give thanks 3. Stretch 4. Laugh
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Life’s A BicycleIF You Can
Balance A BIKE,
You Can Balance Your LIFE!
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Life’s A BicycleHandlebarso Connection pointo Steering mechanismo Help support rider’s
weighto Mounting place for
lights, levers, brakes, etc.
o Come in many styles
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Life’s A BicycleSaddleo Connection pointo Support, stabilityo Does it ‘sit well’?
o Lower ito Change the angleo Adjust your riding styleo Get a post with springso Get one suited to your
needs
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Life’s A BicyclePedalso Connection pointo You push on the pedal to propel
the bike o Some pedals allow you to pull
up on the upstroke also to increase power even more
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Life’s A BicycleThe Right Fito Frame sizeo Wheel sizeo Soft or hard seato How high the
seat rideso How many gearso ???
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Life’s A BicycleFrameo Provides the main
structure for the bikeo Is made differently for
road vs trail ridingo Affects handling &
responsivenesso Affects rider comforto Affects power transfer
efficiency to the wheelso Need to flex vertically
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Life’s A BicycleWheels
o Make it a vehicle
o Provide the movement
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Spokes o Pull the RIM inward toward
the HUBo transfer power from your legs to
the wheelo Support your weight o Even tension on all spokes is
keyo Bike wheels may have 28 -144
spokeso Would you like to draw your
wheel(s)?o How many spokes does your
bike/life have?o How much tension is on each of
your spokes?
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Life’s A BicycleTires
o Cushion your ride
o Give tractiono Help with
handling
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Brakeso Slow it downo Stopping powero Hold it still
Life’s A Bicycle
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What’s the HUB around which your life revolves?
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Life’s A BicycleGears
Are for efficient use of energyHelp your kneesGet you there with less effortHow many gears do your life have?How do you shift gears in your life?
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Helmeto Brain bucket –
protects the heado Minimizes injury in a
fallo Not limit visiono To be effective, needs
to be worn properly
Life’s A Bicycle
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Ego & Soul Working TogetherLife’s A Bicycle
o We need a strong egoo We need Soul to leado What does ego have to
sacrifice to give up the control?
o How can your ego support your Soul?
o How can your ego protect your Soul?
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
We All Need Cocoon Time
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3 KEY Life Balance Skills
3.Take off
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Take Off!It’s about the Journey . . . AND the
Destination1. How’s your journey going?2. What’s your destination/goal?
1. Is your goal something your ego and soul can agree on?
2. Does your manner of traveling fit or suit you?
3. Get Started. . . Exploring new territory
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Exploring New Territory: Hands-on Learning
“The significant problems we have cannot be solved at the same level of thinking with which we developed them.” (Einstein )
Einstein used Combinatory Play to break new ground– His new ideas came through images during playful times
– The harder work was translating them into words (Hadamard)
Our hands know what our frontal lobes do not (Jung)
Carl Jung developed Active Imagination
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Creative Exploration IMaking something with our hands that represents the challenges or dilemmas we face:
Bridges mind and body and spiritBridges “right’ and “left” brain/ uses the whole brainBridges conscious and conscious mindPromotes soulfulness and spiritualityHelps us learn beyond mere thinkingIs practice for exploration in new territory
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Creative Exploration IIBypasses the inner censor to access deeper awareness and higher creativityUtilizes Inductive ReasoningImproves problem-solving skillsIncreases imagination– “Imagination is more Important than facts/knowledge”
(Einstein)
Does not require unusual artistic ability or creativity
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Creative Exploration IIICreating = High Level Learning (Bloom's Taxonomy)
Ancient Wisdom-Chinese proverb
– Tell me and I'll Forget
– Show me and I'll remember
– Involve me and I'll understand
Five Steps to Completion:
Creating
Evaluating
Analyzing
Applying
Understanding
Remembering
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
1. ConnectBody, Mind, Soul, Spirit, Self
How?oGet ride of distractionsoGather materialsoSet a timeroGet comfortableoRelax with Belly Breathing
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
2. Identify1. Identify a current stressor
a)What does your mind go to at stoplights, in the shower, when your brain has downtime?
b) What sticks in your ‘craw’? c) If you had a Magic Wand, what one thing would
you use it to do or change?
2. Write it down; Set this aside
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3. CreateThere is no right or wrong approach to usePay attention to what attracts you or jumps out at youPrepare with deep breathing & relaxationSee with third eye; listen with inner earProceed with action: make something that represents or symbolizes the image(s) or sound(s) that you perceiveYou are the judge of what and when is “enough”
©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.co
m
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
4. ContemplateStop, look & listen (again)
What colors, shapes & textures do you see?Give it a voice: What does it say to you?Activate Your Imagination:– Have an imaginary conversation with your creation– Focus this conversation on the
current dilemma– Follow the conversation (in your
imagination) wherever it leads you
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
5. CrystallizeWhat does this demonstrate about – What you need to Tune In, Tune Up & Take off?– What you can do to help yourself and/or your
employees, students or children balance their complexity, sensitivity & intensity?
– Whatever else came up for you?
Make a record: write or draw what you have perceived.
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
There’s a Time to Leave The Cocoon and Fly
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Take Off!It’s about the Journey . . . AND the
Destination
1. Get Started. . . Explore new territory
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Take Off!2. Stay on Tracko Trail hard to follow?o Things take longer than
expected?o Distractibilityo New ideas that comeo Which idea(s) to follow now?
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Take Off!3. One Pedal
at a Time
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Take Off!4. Pace Yourselfo Is this a strength or a
stretch?o Elk medicine helps
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Take Off!5. Pedal, pedal,
pedalo Requires staminao Requires
commitment
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Take Off!6. Finisho Barriers in the way of
completiono How much discipline
does this take?o What else does it take?
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Take Off!7. Celebrate• Good job! Well done! Yay for you!• Are you good at this?• Barriers to celebration• How can you celebrate your own victories?• How can you help others close to you
celebrate their victories?• What’s a good way to celebrate your
victories of today?
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Life’s A BicycleYou Can
Balance Your Life
Just Like You Balance A Bike!
Academy of Creative Living ©2017 Sharon M. Barnes, LCSW, PLLC www.TherapistForSensitiveAndGifted.com
Life’s a BicycleEvery time You RIDE a bike or even SEE one, I invite you to Remember —To Balance Your LIFEJust Like You Balance a BIKE All You have to do, is:
Tune In
Tune Up Take off