main azaad hun

8/8/2019 Main Azaad Hun

1/5

J&K: We want azadi, Indian dogs go back

Maharashtra(irritated): Tichya aaila, another one! Dont you have something good

to do?

J&K (ignoring): We dont want youwe want freedom! Indian dogs go back

UP: Yeh kya bhaau??? Another target today for you? Whats happening here?

J&K: We dont want to talk to you; we will talk to Dilli only!

UP: Aila, this much tashan??? Are you listening bhaau? Arre o Dada, Bihari bhaiya,

Anna(s), Praji, Daju, come here all of youOh Chinkis, what are you doing there in

the east, you come here too, at once

Tamil Nadu: Yenna sollran? (What are you saying? {They dont know Hindi})

Bihar (to Tamil): Eee saalaAngrezi speak, bhau, you tell

Maharashtra (laughing): Speak English, yenna Rascala

Gradually everyone is gathering Praji, Daju, Chinkis and Bana too...

Punjab: Oh, what happened praji? Why are you shouting slogans?

J&K: Arent you aware of the cruelty that is being inflicted upon us? They hit us with

rifle butts, kick us, slap us, humiliate when they want

Daju: Really? Who does that?

J&K: What has happened to you, dont you read you the newspaper? Your forces arekilling us under their boots daily.

Chinkis (All together, laughing): Welcome to the world dude

Andhra Pradesh: So whats new in that? We are also killed by CRPF battalions

almost daily, fakely encountered

UP: Aur kya, you have not met our policewallahs! Once you meet them, voila

Andhra: Yeah, you know, Delhi has painted us red, everyone thinks that we are

Naxalied. I mean, come on, we have Hyderabad too

Karnataka: Learn from me dude, all that I am is Bengaluru, or may be some times

Mysore or Mangalore tooall perfect models of development!

Maharashtra: Oh, so does that mean that we can count Bellary as ours???

Karnataka: No, no, thats not what I meant


2/5

J&K (intervenes): Stop ityou guys are trivializing my struggle for independence!

Punjab: Independence? Dhheere bol bhaiIf dilli hears this na, none would be

spared. You know what they did to me

North East: They did the same to us, they have always

(As always the voice trails off into oblivion and is ignored)

Bihar: And whats more, you are the special child, most favored? What is it called UP

Bhaiya 370something?

UP: Batao, and they dont give us even a single penny, say that we are corrupt

None of the money reaches the poor. I am telling you, if you want the money to

reach poor, than give us more money

Bihar: They never even look at me, whosoever is governingwe are always

sidelined, and you want independenceHumko dekho, we are independent!

J&K: Have you ever been woken in the middle of the night? Have can you ever see

your entire family being butchered in one moment onlyyou cannotyou cannot

imagine, what it feels like.

Madhya Pradesh: Oh, this is really inhuman. How can they do this?

Rajasthan: Abbe chhup, even your aid will stopand you (to J&K), stop whining. You

are also Indian like us, learn to live with what you have.

J&K: Indian, like you??? Bull shit, we are just a colony for younot your part, never.

If we are also your part then why do you kill us, why shower us with bullets. Why killinnocent defenseless kids?

West Bengal: I agree with you, I am with you in your struggle. Dilli cannot pilfer your

resources and turn a blind eye to the people. Its high time we awaken the people to

a Marxian revolution.

Gujarat: O chup oye Dada! See what socialism did to you, Nano comes out of

Sanand now, not Singur

Uttarakhand: And from Pantnagar too

J&K: I dont have any interests in your revolution Marxist or Manmohanistwhere

is the development anyway? You say we are a part of India, we are a part of Bharat

Nirmaan, and they frisk us when they see Kashmir on our IDs, why? Why have you

not brought IT to us when half the country basks in its glory, where have you taken

our tourists to? Where is the development?

(UP, Bihar, North-East start laughing, Orissa joins)


3/5

UP: Dude, have you been to Mirzapur, Etah

Bihar (cuts in between): Or even, Patna!

J&K: Yes, yes, keep laughingyou have always done that to us!

North-East: Nai boss, honestly, you must send people beyond Bluru, Mumbai andDillirest of the India(sighs)

J&K: But where are the people to be sent? All the dreamsthey are, dreams. The

only knocks we heard were of the military. The only parades we witnessed were the

military identification parades. The dreams that we dreamt were shattered by the

sound of the bullets. The games we played were of life and death

Tamil Nadu: Do you think that rest of the country does not have problems? Look at

the CWG, if only it was to be held in Chennai and not Delhi, we would have shown

the world what TamiIndians are! These north Indians have brought shame to the

country.

UP: Saale Anna, khilate kya wahan pe? Idli Dosa Sambhar??? Everything is good

now with CWG

Punjab: Yes, Delhi is the best place to hold such eventif the games would have

been held in Chennai, all the Goras would have become Kalas and (learnt Tamil)

Blaming North Indians, ruddy are you? All you want to do is to make a separate

countryAnd you (facing Kashmir), you want azadi to go to Pakistan? Never (fire

in the eyes)

J&K: No, azadi for us does not mean merger with Pak! I dont subscribe to LeT orHizbul. We dont want azadi their way

Madhya Pradesh: Chalo yaar, at least you dont want to go with Pakistanthose

guys are waiting to implode too. But you must understand that such issues cannot

be found solution to in streets, by stone pelting

J&K: Has Dilli, left any other method for us? We have waited 60 years, all you give

us is empty promises...There has been a denial on the part of your political set-up to

even acknowledge that we are in pain.

Bihar: Empty promises(Ribs UP) see what happens when the Prime Ministers come

from UP.

Tamil Nadu: I am telling you, Thiru Karunanidhi will be the best PM

UP: Issiliye, that is why, saala you are in south

Karnataka: I suggest you start protesting on the net, Ive realized its a potent

weapon.


4/5

J&K: We are doing that too sending protest letters to your Army, making people

aware of our pain, but where is the result? I am, trying to collect my peopleI am,

ohhh, why dont you just leave us?

Delhi: But we cant do that

J&K: Ohhfinally you are here! So what excuse will you make today?

Delhi: I dont have excuses, I just talk facts.

UP & Bihar: Chalo, you are here, we can talk of some financial issues too

Delhi: Well talk about that later (frowns), first I want to tell you all that the

reporting from J&K has been one sided. They talk of their people being killed,

brutalized; but what about those innocent civilians that were killed and are saved

only by our Army? What about those pundits who had to leave their homes What

about the massacred Sikhs, what about our killed Jawans?

J&K: And so this gives you a valid reason to kill our children? To force nails in their

eyes and ears, arent you ashamed of yourself?

(Rajasthan, Gujarat, Maharashtra gasp in horror)

Delhi: I understand your anger. I understand that there are issuesThe roads and

the rails are yet to reach you even after 60 years. You feel ashamed of being frisked

thrice every day. We can do away with some of this, and believe me, we are willing

to.

J&K: No, you do not understand yetwe dont want you, we want azadi.

Delhi: Do you? Lets seeare you united on this front? Do you all want azadi? Do

you all want to pelt stones at me?

Kashmir: Yes

Delhi: No ones paying you any money for stone pelting?

(Silence, all look at J&K)

Delhi: Jammu, Ladakhdo you want azad Kashmir or do you want to be a part of

the Union of India?

Jammu, Ladakh (look at each other, nod): We are with youIndia (collective sigh)

Kashmir: We want azadi

Delhi: Dont worry, itll come with timeits time now for development!

Kashmir: No


5/5

(The spectators fade away, gradually, silently, to their own worlds)

Epilogue

Sadly there is nothing, absolutely nothing that can bring Showkat back to her

(Showkats mother). Neither the superpower nation, nor azadi Jaibeer (from

Kashmir believes that current crisis has a solution and it is not azadi)

Aayaams Note

Ive tried very hard to step out of my shoes while writing this. Ive called people

names that I would never call them in my life and I apologize for choosing such

words, if it hurts anyone.

I was afraid of selecting wrong words for the feelings of Kashmirs ordinary men and

women, and so I have directly quoted some of their feelings of anguish and hatred. I

(we) understand your pain and it frustrates me to no end that theres nothing else

that I can do for it, for now

main azaad hun

Documents