parent workshop 1 - induction pathways health and research centre author: professor paula barrett...

Parent Workshop 1 - InductionParent Workshop 1 - Induction

Pathways Health and Research Centrewww.pathwayshrc.com.au

Author: Professor Paula Barrett

© Copyright entire contents Dr. Paula Barrett 2012

(Combining Friends for Life and My Friends Youth)(Combining Friends for Life and My Friends Youth)

http://www.pathwayshrc.com.au/

How the program worksHow the program works

There are four developmentally sensitive, evidence based versions of the program:

•10 sessions with two booster session•2 parent sessions•Home Activities to generalise skills

Fun FRIENDS Early Childhood 4-7 years

FRIENDS for Life Primary School 8-11 years

My FRIENDS Youth Upper Primary Middle Secondary

12-15 years

RESILIENCE for Life Upper Secondary to adult

16 years onwards


AgendaAgenda

• Provide an overview of anxiety and resilience in childhood and adolescence

• Provide information about the FRIENDS program

• Questions


Emotional distress is...Emotional distress is...


All children experience anxiety as All children experience anxiety as part of their normal development.part of their normal development.

0 - 5 Months Loss of support, loud noises

7 - 12 Months Fear of strangers, fear of the unexpected

1 Years Separation from main attachment figures,

toileting and injury fears

2 - 6 Years Many fears: loud noises, animals, darkness,

separation, life changes, strangers, Injury, monsters

7 – 8 Years Supernatural beings, dark, media events, left alone, injury

9 - 12 Years Test and exams, school performance, bodily injury, physical appearance, thunder and lightning, death, the dark (low percentage)

Adolescents School, home, safety, political issues, personal relationships, personal appearance, natural phenomena, uncertainty/future, animals


Varies across cultures

• they have a significant impact on your life

• they are beyond developmental appropriateness

• they cause significant distress

• they have been present for long periods

• they cause significant interference

Emotions become challenging when… Emotions become challenging when…

Barriers that prevent us from thinking in helpful ways and paying Barriers that prevent us from thinking in helpful ways and paying attention to positive things around us.attention to positive things around us.


Factors associated with a vulnerability for one to experience severe emotional distress throughout

•Temperament - Sensitivity/low thresholds for stress

•Traumatic experiences•Developmental challenges

Risk FactorsRisk Factors


Scientific proven resilience skills

•Attachment/Affection•How we pay attention•Positive thinking style•Support networks (extended family, community and friendships)•Health factors (sleep, daily physical activity, healthy eating)•Skills taught in evidenced based prevention programs (FRIENDS programs)

Protective FactorsProtective Factors


Some of the important gifts Some of the important gifts you can give your children…you can give your children…

• Unconditional love/Positive, stable attachment

• Paying attention to the positives

• Positive thinking style

• Time to be children/unstructured, creative, outdoor, active play

• Resilience skills© Copyright entire contents Dr. Paula Barrett 2012

What is emotional wellbeing?What is emotional wellbeing?

• Being attentive to your surroundings• Being aware of what is in the here and now• Being aware of and enjoying all of your senses• Paying attention to what you see, hear, smell, feel and

taste and accepting it• Being non-judgemental – It just is

MindfulnessMindfulness


ResilienceResilience

Resilience = to spring back, or rebound

Oxford Dictionary

Ability to overcome adversity; achieving good outcomes regardless of life events or circumstances.


Emotional and Social Skills Emotional and Social Skills necessary for resiliencenecessary for resilience

• Self regulation

• Self soothing

• Empathy

• Friendship skills

• Self and Social awareness

Ability to form and maintain positive and Ability to form and maintain positive and stable attachmentsstable attachments


Childhood Challenges Childhood Challenges

• Trying and learning new things• Managing feelings & ‘meltdowns’• Knowing triggers (if any)• Making friends• Handling bullying• Fitting into the family and school environment


“Children who are emotionally and socially skilled are more successful at school”

(Durlak et al., 2011)

Benefits of ResilienceBenefits of Resilience


Social CompetenceSocial Competence

“Academic performance in grade 8 could be better predicted

from knowing children’s social competence social competence 5 years earlier than

from primary school academic results.”


Specific Skills and Techniques TaughtSpecific Skills and Techniques Taught


ATTACHMENT

ATTACHMENT

Theoretical Model of Anxiety/Depression Theoretical Model of Anxiety/Depression Prevention and Resilience BuildingPrevention and Resilience Building


ATTACHMENTATTACHMENT

Attachment is the number one predictor of positive Attachment is the number one predictor of positive wellbeing wellbeing (the first few years of life are the most crucial)

•Unconditional love is the most important thing regardless of intelligence, financial resources, environment etc. •Use attachment skills as often as possible in daily interactions

•Physical and psychological connection •Facial expressions•Feelings of security are circular•Differentiate between unconditional love and the behaviour of your loved one•Praise children for trying their best, not just for outcomes


(Stable Life-long Attachment)(Stable Life-long Attachment)

ATTACHMENTATTACHMENT

Tools:Tools:

•Understanding Feelings

•Emotional Self-regulation

•Self-soothing ability

•Empathy Skills

•Circle of Support


LEARNINGLEARNING

Tools:Tools:

•Problem Solving Skills/ Coping skills

•Gradual Step Plans to Achieve Goals

•Identification of Positive Role Models

•Peer Support

•Benefits of Giving To Others

(Altruism and Compassion)

•Interpersonal Rewards© Copyright entire contents Dr. Paula Barrett 2012

MINDMIND

Tools:Tools:

•Awareness of Self-talk

•Choosing Helpful Self-talk and Thinking

•Changing Unhelpful Thinking to Helpful Thinking

•Expecting Good Things to Happen

•Understanding of Feelings-Thoughts-Behaviour Interactions


BODYBODY

Tools:Tools:

•Becoming friends with your body

•Deep Breathing Exercises

•Relaxation Activities

•Mindfulness

•Self-awareness

•Health factors

•Having fun and enjoying life


In The Friends programs…In The Friends programs…

• The FRIENDS program is about working in small groups, sharing, role plays, fun, creativity, normalisation and mutual support

• The FRIENDS program is not about reading and writing and individual work

• Reflective work is to be done at home

• Each individuals workbook is important for reflection and rehearsal of skills outside of group sessions


Important to know…Important to know…

Self-Awareness: getting to know yourself, your patterns, your sensitivities, will help with self regulation

Changing Habits: it takes time to change psychological and physical habits – usually 2-3 months

Reciprocal Skills: all skills need to be practiced by all family members (top down + bottom up through the system)

Modelling Skills: FRIENDS program facilitators model to group participants, children model to each other, children model to their parents


What are your expectations?What are your expectations?

• Realistic expectations about long term change

• Responsibilities:• Child: trying to learn and use new skills• Parent: learn new skills for themselves and for

the child, model these skills to children, helping to generalise skills to life situations, praise (little and big) positive changes, make an effort to notice small positive changes


How can you help?How can you help?

• Families and caregivers play a vital role in the development and maintenance of the skills taught in the FRIENDS program.

• Each week your child (ren) will be introduced to specific skills to help build their resiliency. These skills need to be reinforced both during the group and in the home environment in order for change to occur.

• We strongly encourage adults to do the adult resilience

programs which will help understand resilience skills and help when practising with children


How to Prepare children and adults How to Prepare children and adults for doing the friends programsfor doing the friends programs

• Explain the concept of resilience. • This program will give everyone resilience skills

that will help them be the best they can be throughout their lives and face challenges in a positive, confident way


Overview of ContentOverview of Content


Why do we use the word “FRIENDS”?Why do we use the word “FRIENDS”?

Because:

• Our body is our friend

• We need to be a good friend to ourselves

• We can make friends

• Talking to our friends is important

• FRIENDS is an acronym for the skills and strategies taught in the program

• For Life: We need to use these skills throughout the rest of our lives when faced with challenges

Because:

• Our body is our friend

• We need to be a good friend to ourselves

• We can make friends

• Talking to our friends is important

• FRIENDS is an acronym for the skills and strategies taught in the program

• For Life: We need to use these skills throughout the rest of our lives when faced with challenges


FFeelings.RRemember to Relax. Have quiet time.I I can do it! I can try my best!EExplore Solutions and Coping Step Plans. NNow reward yourself! You’ve done your best!DDon’t forget to practise.SSmile! Stay calm and talk to your support networks!

The FRIENDS acronymThe FRIENDS acronym


F = FEELINGSF = FEELINGS

Talk about feelings Talk about other people’s feelings

The FRIENDS program helps children to learn to identify when they are feeling worried or nervous or angry by recognising their own individual body clues, which prompt them to calm down and relax and choose ‘thumbs up’ ideas for coping.

• Learning to understand and regulate our own feelings and learn empathy for others’ feelings

• Working on feeling happy, brave and confident


Tips for Families:Tips for Families:

Try to verbalise what you think your child is feeling. Validate your child’s feelings before problem solving as a way

of letting your child know that you understand how they are feeling.

Talking about feelings helps to communicate to children that all feelings are ok, however; it is what we choose to do with our feelings that counts (thumbs up, thumbs down behaviours).

Identify and discuss the strengths of each family member. Becoming aware of strengths will enhance and boost individual and family confidence.

F = FEELINGSF = FEELINGS


R = RELAXR = RELAXThis step teaches children to learn and practise a variety of relaxation This step teaches children to learn and practise a variety of relaxation techniques. Why? We find it hard to think straight if we are not calmtechniques. Why? We find it hard to think straight if we are not calm

‘‘Milkshake Breathing ‘ - Slow deep breathingMilkshake Breathing ‘ - Slow deep breathing•Breathing slowly helps us relax our body, our heart beat slows down and we feel less tense and worriedMuscle RelaxationMuscle Relaxation•When we tense and relax our muscles our body releases happy chemicals (endorphins) which makes us feel relaxedVisualisationVisualisation•Imagining a peaceful, happy relaxing place can help us to feel calmQuiet TimeQuiet Time•Activities that make yourself feel happy and relaxed

Fun activities with the family is a way of relaxing and feeling goodFun activities with the family is a way of relaxing and feeling good© Copyright entire contents Dr. Paula Barrett 2012


• Encourage your child (ren) to verbalise what is happening inside of their bodies when they experience a variety of emotions.

• Once children are aware of their body clues, they need to do something about this. Encourage child to practise relaxation strategies

• Practise / allocate quiet time each day

• Encourage and practise breathing

• Develop family relaxation menu of feel-good activities

N.B. Being really angry might need some active calming down strategies N.B. Being really angry might need some active calming down strategies like running or jumping on the trampoline to get the energy out!like running or jumping on the trampoline to get the energy out!

R = RELAXR = RELAX


I = I can try! I = I can try! (helpful thoughts)(helpful thoughts)

This step teaches children to tune into their self-talk. This is an This step teaches children to tune into their self-talk. This is an important skill as thoughts influence feelings and behaviour. important skill as thoughts influence feelings and behaviour.

There are two main steps:

1.Awareness of red thoughts (negative self-talk)2.Replacing with green thoughts (positive self-talk).


Red THOUGHTS vs. Green Red THOUGHTS vs. Green (POWERFUL) THOUGHTS(POWERFUL) THOUGHTS

“I’m dumb”“I’m ok at lots of things”“I give up”“If I try I’ll get better.”“I hate my sister/ brother”“I find my brother/ sister annoying sometimes, but other times they are fun to play with”“I have no friends”“I have 2 people I play with and my dog is my friend”


Challenging unhelpful thoughtsChallenging unhelpful thoughts

Another way you can help your child change unhelpful thoughts into helpful thoughts is to challenge them be asking certain questions, and looking for evidence against the unhelpful thoughts. Talk about red thoughts trying to trick them!

e.g. “I can’t do anything right.”To find out how silly that thought is, ask some simple questions…• But you do many things well, don’t you?

Now try to make a helpful green thought by…• Naming 2 or 3 things that the child tries to do well• Together remember a time when both you and your child

tried really hard © Copyright entire contents Dr. Paula Barrett 2012

• Am I exaggerating?

• Am I sure this is really going to happen?

• Is this really true?

• How much does it matter what other people think?

• Am I forgetting the positives?

• Can I really expect to be perfect at everything I do?

• What is the worst thing that could possibly happen?

• Even if the red thought is a bit true, how helpful is it for me to

think this way?

• Am I going to let this red thought boss me around?

Yellow Challenger ThoughtsYellow Challenger Thoughts


Tips for Families:Tips for Families: Encourage your child to pay attention to positive things in themselves, in other

people and the world. Help your children to see to see the glass as ‘half-full’ rather than ‘half empty’.

This takes time and practice! Help your child become aware of their self-talk and assist them in turning

negative thoughts into positive and powerful thoughts. Help your child practice bossing back unhelpful thoughts and replacing them

with more positive thoughts. Notice negative thinking in yourself or your child. Young people model what they see and hear around them. If you recognise

that you are saying unhelpful words or feeling tense or nervous then let your child know that you are aware of this. Then demonstrate coming up with an alternative positive way of looking at your situation.

I = I can try! (helpful thoughts)I = I can try! (helpful thoughts)


E = Encourage E = Encourage How to be a good friendHow to be a good friend

This session teaches children friendship skills and how to be brave by talking small steps towards something we find tricky or scary.

Improve friendship skills through role plays (or with puppets for young children)Look people in the eyeListenSmileShareTake turnsHelp


E = Encourage – STEP PLANSE = Encourage – STEP PLANS

COPING STEP PLANS The step plan involves breaking down a

challenging situation into small, achievable, easy steps.

The steps gradually become more difficult until the fear is overcome.

Children need to use the FRIENDS plan (deep breaths, green thoughts) as they climb each step.

Children cannot go the next step until they feel calm and relaxed on the current step.

This session teaches children how to be brave by taking small This session teaches children how to be brave by taking small steps towards something we find tricky or scary.steps towards something we find tricky or scary.


Pathways Health & Research Centre 88 Boundary Street West End Qld 4010

www.pathwayshrc.com.au

Coping Step PlansCoping Step Plans

Goals could relate to:Overcoming a fear Preparing for an upcoming event Learning a new skill Trying something new Completing a task Achieving a goal


1. Find out the details of the presentation, e.g. topic, length, date, etc. Ask the teacher or friends questions if I am unsure about something.

2. Go to the library and research the presentation topic.

3. Write the talk and practice reading it in front of the mirror.

Session 7: Session 7: Step Plan…Doing a presentation Step Plan…Doing a presentation

7. Goal: Present talk in front of the whole class confidently. Remember to do some deep breathing to help me relax and pay attention to the teacher smiling at me.

6. On the morning of the presentation try to stay calm. Remember to think helpful thoughts!

5. Present talk to the entire family or small group of friends or classmates and get a good night’s sleep prior to the presentation.

4. Present talk to a family member and get some feedback or advice to improve.


Step 1

Step 2

Step 3

Step 4

Step 5

Step 6: GOALHelpful thoughts

Rewards


Tips for Families:

• Encourage your child to tell you something challenging.• Give your child descriptive praise when they try their best.• Help your child to practise saying GREEN thoughts when faced

with new situations or challenges.• Share your own experiences when facing challenges .• Break skills and activities into small steps. Don’t expect your child

to progress to the next level until they have mastered the level below and feel confident.

STEP PLANSSTEP PLANS




The 6-Block Problem Solving Plan The 6-Block Problem Solving Plan

The 6 steps:① What is the Problem?② What could I do? (Think of different ideas)③ List what might happen - the consequences for each solution④ Pick the best solution⑤ Do it! (Put your plan into action)⑥ Did it work? (Good points and bad points)




The 6-Block Problem Solving Plan: The 6-Block Problem Solving Plan: Example…Example…

1. What is the Problem? 1. What is the Problem? I had a fight with a friend and now she’s spreading rumours about me…

What can I do?What can I do?

What might happen?What might happen?

Pick the best solutionPick the best solution

Try it outTry it outDid it work?Did it work?


REWARDSREWARDS

EXAMPLES OF REWARDSEXAMPLES OF REWARDS

Spending time doing their favourite activity together

Spending fun, relaxing time with friends and family

Cooking a special, healthy meal together

Going to a natural place (beach, park) for a picnic

Relaxation time together

Celebrating the special little things in life

Encourage rewarding yourself with non material rewards.Encourage rewarding yourself with non material rewards.© Copyright entire contents Dr. Paula Barrett 2012

REWARDSREWARDS


• Teach children to reward themselves when they try hard.

• Rewards need to be given straight after the effort.

• Trying is more important than outcome.

• Focus on what children (can do) first. Then help them to try and ‘have a go’ at what they find challenging.


N = Nurture N = Nurture

Tips for families:Tips for families:

• Identify the people whom you look up to in your life both now or in the past. Identify their strengths discuss with your child (ren) the ways in which these people have impacted your life.

• Have a family discussion as to the sources of supports available to you. For example, family, friends, community leaders, teachers, family GP, sports coach, music or dance teacher etc.


D = Don’t forget to be BraveD = Don’t forget to be Brave


• Try to incorporate the FRIENDS language into everyday life. • Continue to challenge unhelpful thoughts (RED thoughts) and

turn them into helpful thoughts (GREEN thoughts). • Discuss situations where a coping step plan may be useful

(e.g., going to school, making friends, learning to ride a bike).• Continue to help your child generate personal ways to reward

themselves for their efforts.


S = Stay happyS = Stay happySkill Practice SessionsSkill Practice Sessions


• Help your child to identify future challenges (e.g., beginning a new school) and to set realistic goals for now and the future (e.g., learning to swim or attend school camp).

• Keep practicing the FRIENDS skills each day to help your child (ren) manage current and future challenges.

• Daily practice of the FRIENDS skills will help maintain positive changes. However, setbacks may occur from time-to-time, this is to be expected. Don’t despair! The FRIENDS skills are skills to be used in real-life situations both now and for the rest of your lives.


What to expectWhat to expect

• Talking about feelings – increased family communication, learning a ‘new’ language, empowers parents

• More empathy towards others (people, animals and nature)

• Being braver – trying new situations, approach behaviours

• Calmer, more positive thinking

• Once we introduce step plans can deal directly with challenging situations


Are there any questions about Are there any questions about the program? the program?


COPYRIGHT, INTELLECTUAL PROPERTY COPYRIGHT, INTELLECTUAL PROPERTY AND TRADEMARK, LEGAL ISSUESAND TRADEMARK, LEGAL ISSUES

The information in these power point slides can not be replicated, used, nor presented

in any other manner without written permission from the author.


THANK YOU!THANK YOU!

Pathways Health and Research Centre

www.pathwayshrc.com.auEmail: [email protected]


http://www.pathwayshrc.com.au/

mailto:[email protected]

parent workshop 1 - induction pathways health and research centre author: professor paula barrett...

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