pelican brief -...

PELICAN BRIEF NEWSLETTER OF THE SUNSHINE COAST ULYSSES BRANCH

ULYSSES CLUB INC

Inside this issue :

Mount Glorious 8

Lakeside Villas 9

AGM 10

Wednesday Ride Brekkie at Coco’s

11

Jimna Ride 12

Kenilworth /Woodford 13

Lake Baroon 16

APRIL 2012

Inside this issue

Newly elected committee members

Rear: Glen—Secretary, Mark—President, Ken—Webmaster

Front: Carole—Treasurer, Margie—Social Coordinator, Juanita—Quartermaster

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THE COMMITTEETHE COMMITTEETHE COMMITTEETHE COMMITTEE

PRESIDENT: MARK JONES

EMAIL: [email protected]

PH: 0413 205 490 0413 205 490 0413 205 490 0413 205 490

SECRETARY: GLENN TRUSLER


PH: 0408 593 0330408 593 0330408 593 0330408 593 033

TREASURER: CAROLE LOWDE


PH: 0435 455 609 0435 455 609 0435 455 609 0435 455 609

RIDE COORDINATOR:

EMAIL:

PH: 04PH: 04PH: 04PH: 04

SOCIAL COORDINATOR: MARGIE SCOTT


PH: 0417 194 814 0417 194 814 0417 194 814 0417 194 814

WELFARE OFFICER;

EMAIL:

PH:

QUARTERMASTER: JUANITA OWEN


PH : 0417 766 3690417 766 3690417 766 3690417 766 369

WEBMASTER: KEN PRESCOTT


PH: 0419 148 1360419 148 1360419 148 1360419 148 136

NEWSLETTER EDITOR: ROB HALL


PH: 0418 842 6220418 842 6220418 842 6220418 842 622

Website: Website: Website: Website: www.ssulysses.org.auwww.ssulysses.org.auwww.ssulysses.org.auwww.ssulysses.org.au

The Ulysses Club Inc is a social club for motorcyclists aged 40 and over.

The Sunshine Coast Branch is a fully sanctioned element of the Ulysses

Club Inc.

The aim of the Ulysses Club Inc are:

To provide ways in which older motorcyclist can get together for com-

panionship and mutual support.

To show by example that motorcycling can be an enjoyable and practi-

cal activity for riders of all ages

To draw attention of public and private

institutions to the needs and views of older riders.

Branch Details

Disclaimer

The opinions expressed in this publication are those of the author and

do not necessarily represent those of the editor or any

committee member of the Sunshine Coast Branch of the Ulysses Club

Inc.

The editor reserves the right to refuse any publication if it is

considered to be offensive or breach any advertising law. It is assumed

that any photos submitted for this newsletter has the express permis-

sion of the subjects.

The Editor reserves the right to correct any grammar , spelling and

necessary amendments.

Address all correspondence to:

The Secretary,

79 Lady Musgrave Drive

Mountain Creek Qld 4557

Monthly social meeting (gathering) are held on the first Tuesday of the

month :

Kawana Waters Bowls N Recreation Club

476 Nicklin Way , Wurtulla 4575

Meals from 6pm—meeting at 7.30pm

Sunshine Coast DetailsSunshine Coast DetailsSunshine Coast DetailsSunshine Coast Details

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PRESIDENT'S REPORT

Advertising Fee Schedule (per issue) Full Page:

Casual : $30 Min 3 Issues: $25 Min 12 Issues: $20

Half Page: Casual: $30 Min 3 Issues : $15

Quarter Page or Less:

$10 per Issue (Fees subject to own formatted Advert being provided)

Note: Members Business Directory (1/8 page card size/style) is free to active branch members.

A warm welcome to all the members of the Ulysses Sunshine Coast Branch . It is with great honour that I take up the position of President of this great motorcycling club. I intend to serve the club and its members to the best of my ability. We have a great committee working for us with some exciting new ideas which will move us for-ward while respecting the clubs traditional values. On behalf of the new committee I would like to thank the outgoing committee for all their hard work and dedication that enabled our club to function over the previous year, especially to Laurie and Marilynn for their stead fast guidance over their two terms of office . We are very lucky to retain Ken , Juanita , Margie and hopefully Maus on the committee, their experience and guidance will help us new ones to get up and running as soon as possible . I ask all our members to help and support your committee and to volunteer assistance when needed , many hands make light work and a lot more fun too . Since joining the club a little over a year ago , my wife Heather and I have met some wonderful people and made many friends , we moved over from WA hardly knowing anyone and now we are part of this fine motorcycling fraternity called Ulysses , we couldn’t be happier and for that we thank you all. The club is in good shape and has something for everyone, Sunday and Wednesday rides , break-fasts , dinner s, nights out and weekends away , we hope to build on this solid base and all your suggestions and ideas will be most welcome . By the time you read this Heather and I will have returned from the Mildura AGM, with a few kilometers on the clock and lots of stories to tell no doubt. We are looking forward to the ride and cant wait to hit the open highway . Stay safe, be happy and I will see you on the road. Mark Jones # 58980

Editors Desk: Hello all, This newsletter is a combined effort . Rob has taken over my place as Editor but he is away touring down south. So Uwe took over the reins and did most of this newsletter for you . He then also headed south and put it back in my hands to finalise and get printed. As I am not at the meeting , I have given it to Margie to deliver to you . Hopefully next month will run a little more smoother !Thank you again for your support while I was editor—please support you new editor. Lyn

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RIDE ETIQUETTE

General Information

Member safety is always the prime consideration whenever planning , leading or taking part in an organized ride. Ride leaders and organizers of rides should always take into account the age of participants , riding abilities , road and weather conditions and any other issue which may affect the ride. The Ulysses Club does not carry insurance for members on rides, as members are required to comply with State laws in relation to registration and insurance of their vehicles , and to comply with the requirements of the various laws and also the conditions of their insurance policies. Ulysses Club policy is that the Club does not endorse any ride procedure , rather a meeting place for rides to leave from, and individual’s choice as to where and how they ride , subject to road and traffic conditions and regulations. When on Club or Branch rides there are a few recommendations that should be adhered to. Remember ,riding is an enjoyable and exciting and should remain so even though there are few risks involved. What follows on this page are sugges-tions only and are not to be misconstrued as rules or regulations. Etiquette :

♦ Arrive for the ride at least 15 minutes before the departure time with a FULL tank and an EMPTY bladder.

♦ There is usually a ride leader at the front and a Tail—end Charlie at the rear of the group.

♦ The ride leader should give a short outline of the route to be taken and the proposed stops along the way. Tail—end Charlie should make himself known to all participants.

♦ If you are leaving the ride before the destination , please inform Tail—end Charlie, and if possible the ride leader.

♦ On some rides , a corner marking system is used . Usually , the rider immediately following the ride leader is assigned (next) corner marker. If the ride leader turns at an intersection, than the second rider stops at that corner until all bikes have turned and then takes up a position in front of tail end Charlie. It is not necessary to resume your place behind the ride leader as the bike now in second place takes the corner marker’s job.

♦ I’ve never ridden in a group before. What should I do ?

♦ It is always a good idea to follow at least three bike lengths behind the bike in front of you , but more is always better.

♦ Adding an extra couple of bike lengths in wet weather will allow you more reaction time & braking distance.

♦ Staying in the same place within the group is a much safer options than blasting past everyone in front of you. Usually the slower riders begin ( and remain) towards the rear of the group anyway.

♦ If you do need to overtake , remember you have a responsibility to obey normal road rules.

♦ Every rider has his or her own skill. Ride to your own ability and skill level at all times.

♦ Obey the road rules and speed levels.

♦ Ensure your bike is roadworthy.

♦ It is a Ulysses Club rule that no other rockers, rollers or badges of any description are allowed on the back of a jacket or vest bearing an old man patch.

♦ Above all, ride safely and be alert and aware of what is happening around you.

♦ Scan constantly for danger. Never ride when you are tired or after drinking alcohol.

♦ Take regular breaks every hour or so.

♦ Wear all the gear all the time (WATTGAT). Falls can occur anywhere anytime .

♦ Road Rash hurts !!

PLEASE READPLEASE READPLEASE READPLEASE READ

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Corner marking: never get lost on a ride again! Corner marking is a major factor in the success of our club rides. Corner marking allows us to concentrate on the road between coffee breaks without worrying about where we are, that is the responsibility of the lead rider, who will mark corners on the route by placing the rider following him at or just before the corner where we need to change direction. We can just enjoy the ride! A few "rules" for successful corner marking: 1. The lead rider (he/she with the map) and the rear rider (Tail end Charlie) will be introduced to you at

the ride pre-amble before the ride starts. 2. At any corner (yes, even the most obvious ones such as leaving a car park or service station driveway),

the lead rider should place a corner marker. During the ride, he will do this by pointing to indicate where he/she wants the next rider to stop and corner mark- If the traffic is heavy, this may well be a couple of hundred metres before an intersection, and the lead rider may well place a second corner marker at the exit of the intersection or roundabout.

3. This is where a bit of common sense comes into play. If, as a rider, you see a spot that could be confusing

and has not been marked by the lead rider (or maybe the person who was meant to corner mark didn't stop for whatever reason) display some initiative and mark that corner yourself. Your mates that are fol-lowing will be happy, the lead rider will never know, and you may well be instrumental in getting the whole group to the next bakery!

4. The corner marker must always stop in a spot that is both safe for them and where the riders in the

group can easily see them. A safe location is very important. 5. Having located yourself in a safe position as corner marker, you then need to signal to the ride group the

direction in which they are to proceed. Do this by waving an arm and use of your turn indicator. It is ap-preciated that not all bikes turn indicators work when the engine is switched off. Sure, you can stop the engine if you need but don’t flatten the battery with your headlamp on just to have the indicator working! A vigorous wave of an arm is effective. (Pillions come in useful here!) It is suggested that you stay seated on your bike; this saves time when the rear rider comes on to the scene.

6. Now read this - it is important! As corner marker, you must wait in position until the tail rider arrives

and clears you to proceed. Usually this takes about ten minutes or so for the group to pass but if some-thing has gone wrong with a bike or rider then the tail rider may take a considerable time to sort things out and get to your location. As corner marker, you must stay in place until the tail rider comes along, even if it takes an hour or more. If you move on before the tail rider arrives then the tail rider and others will not know which way to go at the spot that you were corner marking! They will not be happy!

7. As the rear rider approaches you, they will indicate with their headlamp or horn (or a wave) and this is

your signal to leave your spot and rejoin the ride, getting ahead of the rear rider as soon as it is safe. A golden rule - if a corner is not marked, is to always follow the main road, and to follow the bitumen where a

dirt road goes straight ahead and the bitumen veers off. One last thing. If you are immediately ahead of the rear rider, always keep their headlight in view. This does

not mean that you have to sit two seconds ahead, but rather have an occasional look in your mirrors (you do scan them regularly, don’t you?) If you cannot see the rear rider's headlight, then ask yourself why and if necessary wait or turn around and look for the rear rider. Being rear rider can be very lonely indeed if something goes wrong.

Note – New members or members not comfortable with corner marking can follow on behind Tail end Charlie (Arrange this with Ride Captain before departing) Mark Jones,

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Which bikes do you currently own: 2011 Harley Ultra Classic; 2007 Moto Guzzi 1200 Sports

What was your first bike: Honda SS 50 sports moped—I was 15 years old when my parents bought it for me so I could get to work. I still remember the feeling of freedom that little bike gave me.

Which bike do you wish you had kept: Kawasaki st 1000 shaft drive 1980(?) - it was a lovely bike and I wish it was still parked in my garage.

What other interests do you have:: The gardens take up much of my time; we have a small boat; cooking; red wine; dining out; entertaining and travelling.

What is/was your profession: I served my apprenticeship in Coventry as a toolmaker , this allowed me to move to NZ with Fisher and Paykell , my last position was at Royal Perth Hospital as a technician, responsible for the instruments in Theatres.

What was your favourite ride: I’ve had a few but the one that stands out was the ride to Phillip Island and Tasmania two years ago.

What ride would you like to do: Himalayan high roads , I’d like to do a big bike tour in America, Sturgis.

Tell us about yourself: Heather and I have been married for two and a half years, we moved from Perth one and a half years ago . I spent a lot of time travelling, mainly in India, we still travel when we are able to, we both enjoy living on the sunshine coast and the blessed lifestyle we lead here.

Where have you lived: Royal Leamington Spa; Auckland; Christchurch; Perth; Mont-ville

Where were you born: Nuneaton, Warwickshire, England

Member Profile

Mark Jones - President of the SSC branch 2012

This is the first of the Member Profiles we hope to put in your newsletter each month . We are starting with the com-mittee in the aim for all of us to get to know each other a little more . We have started this month with Mark (president) and Glenn (secretary). So over the next couple of months get your fingers typing and send in your profiles for the newsletter as well . Thanks—editor.

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What bike do you currently own: 1998 Honda Blackbird

What was your first bike: Dexon 125cc Rockhopper with a Pull start engine (Lawnmower engine). I was about 10 years old and my dad bought it for me to ride around the paddocks. I blew up the 1st engine so dad & I took the engine from his lawnmower and replaced it in the Rockhopper. I had this bike for about a year and then upgraded to a Yamaha YZ 80 B. This was my first proper motorbike.

Which bike do you wish you had kept: I would love to keep the bike I currently own and also upgrade to a later model

What other interests do you have: Fishing on our boat, BBQ’s with friends, eating out, watching motorsport and travelling.

What is/was your profession: I served my apprenticeship as a Cabinet Maker with Berryman’s furniture in Sydney, I was an owner driver for 7 years in the car carrying industry, became a Transport coordinator for an aluminium company for 6 years, then managed a Powder Coating factory for 3 years before moving to Qld. I currently am a storeman/driver for a company on the Sunshine Coast.

What was your favourite ride: My favourite ride is through the Snowy Mountains to Delegate River. I also enjoyed riding on the Putty Road to the Hunter Valley in NSW.

What ride would you like to do: I would like to explore more of Australia.

Tell us about yourself: I have 3 adult children who live in Sydney. Kathy & I have been together for 12 years. We moved to the Sunshine Coast 4 years ago. We enjoy the relaxed lifestyle here and would like to spend more time travelling the country.

Member Profile

Glenn Trusler — Secretary of SSC Branch 2012

Where were you born: Shoreham by Sea, England

Where have you lived: Fairfield, Penrith, Silverdale, Warragamba, Quakers Hill, Mountain Creek;

You are invited to a night of fun and entertainment at Velvet Waters in

Caloundra. The Vegas on the Coast with a Dinner and Show package.

Saturday 21st April 2012 At

6.30pm prompt Come and see the famous Aussie motorcycle stunt man - Johnny Fogwell (look him up on Google) perform his Musical Tribute Show to some of the greats. Cost is $79.00 per head for dinner & show – drinks are extra. Please call Kathy on 0410 452 359 to secure your booking. I need to collect all the monies by the 15th April 2012 to secure your seats. To save the worry of driving home, for those who would like to, there is a campsite down the road where we can camp for the night, or alternatively there is a Motel close by, let me know if you would like to join us staying overnight. We will be having a BBQ breakfast at the campsite on Sunday Morning.

YOU ARE INVITED

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Mount Glorious Lightning never strikes the same place twice! The weather looked promising, ten bikes waiting at the Etta for the Sunday ride , because Sundays are for riding full stop ! It was to be Mt Glorious with lunch at the Samford hotel then home via Mt Mee . Memories of the “chief” copping it over Mt Mee only a few weeks before still fresh in my mind . Smoko was at Woodford and all was good , lots to talk about, friends eager to catch up, because you know each time we ride out there is a new set of riders and sometimes we don’t see our cobbers for a few weeks . Aint that the great thing about our club. Mt Glorious was difficult, I felt edgy on the many tight corners , wet and slippy with leaves and storm debris tossed in to keep us on our toes . Most of the riders reported their bikes slid and skipped out on the corners , it was challenging rid-ing . The local constabulary was out in force, but on this occasion the day was ours, not dollar or a demerit point given . Lunch behind us and Mt Mee before us , the rain came down and the mist set it , more tough riding , we were all wet but we knew we were alive . Deja vu or ground hog day , call it what you like ! The lead riders stoped at the Woodford junction to regroup , we knew we waited too long , a car stopped , wound down the window, a lady said that a bike was down on the Mt Mee bends . No not again ! surely not . We all hurried back and thankfully Bruce and Eric were on their way . Bruce hit some diesel on a wet bend , the front wheel let go , he managed to stay on but went off the road in to the grass , Bruce was thrown over the handlebars while the bike came to rest against a bank , it could have been a lot worse . Praise the lord, Bruce was unscathed although a little wide eyed and the Yammie only a bent Gear lever. That same day four bikers (not from our club) went down on the Bruce Highway , we called our loved ones and family to assure them that we were safe. Bikes are in our blood, we carry on, we wouldn’t have it any other way. See you next Sunday . Ride safe Mark Jones # 58980

Sunday 4th Mar

9

Lakeside Villas BBQ 3rd

10

AGM March 6th

11

Midweek Ride 7th March

Breakfast at Coco’s

Currimundi Lakes

10th March

12

The weather was awful up on the hill but we set off anyway. Only Eric on the spyder waiting for us at the Etta, Good on yer Eric! Big Jim had come down too, not sure if it was for support or to see which nutters would ride a bike on a day like today. Jim was in his ute and kindly offered it to be the Harley recovery vehicle! thank you Jim (you will keep) As true knights of the road we roared off, determined to do the ride as planned. Eric kindly agreed to be tail end Charlie and today we didn’t lose anybody, proving that it can’t be mine or Eric’s fault when riders get lost. I had a directional oversight which took us up a dead end to Mt Kilcoy – a beautiful road in both directions, further on we were stopped in our tracks by a river raging over the road but managed to get ourselves back on the road to Jimna, the country side was lovely, the air smelling fresh and cool with mist and clouds hanging in the hills. At Jimna we were met by Dave who is the president of the Jimna tower action group, he put the billy on and we had a cuppa and toasted raisin bread while he talked of the struggles they were battling with in saving the tower. At Woodford Eric peeled off and headed for home, us heading for Mt Mee. You may remember that the past two times I have lead a ride over the mount, two riders have come to grief, and maybe that’s why nobody showed up today? Did Eric loose his nerve at the last minute? Off we went alone! Towards the mountain of doom, wondering what would become of us . We passed the corner where Eric (the chief) crashed, the dent in the road still clearly visible where his wallet hit the ground. Should we turn back? We made it to Old Petrie Village unscathed! where Jeff and Elaine were waiting for us, it was good to see their friendly, smiling faces. We had lunch and a quick look around but most shops were closed due to the bad weather. It was a good ride and I will reschedule it for another Sunday. Be carefull out there. See you on the road.

Mark Jones # 58980

SUNDAY Ride 18th March 2012

Tony Woolmer with the Lower Murray Branch a couple of weeks ago.

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Sunday Ride on 25th April 2012

Kenilworth and Woodford

We woke up Sunday morning to the familiar sound of rain. Arrived at the Ettamogah Pub to see three people already waiting. By 8.30am our group had grown to 14 bikes and 20 hearty souls! Grey overcast skies still threatening, the true spirit of Ulyssean's prevailed and we were all keen to get going. It was great to see a few members who we haven't seen for a while and a couple of new riders – Andy and Leesa. Plus a couple of brand new bikes – Mark on his new BMW K1600 GT and Brian & Karen on their new Honda Goldwing. After a brief run down of the route and a volunteer for tail end Charlie (John & Linda as I am not totally convinced that their ride is a motorcycle, I think it is half a car with a wheel stuck in front of it)!! Off we headed through Mooloolah, Eudlo, up over Kiels Mountain, through to Yandina and on to Kenilworth for smoko. After a relaxing cup of coffee and chat and the removal of wet weather gear worn by those who weren't too sure of our weather predictions, we set off to Woodford, via Reesville Road, Burnett Lane, onto Stanley River Road. It's roads like this where it's an advantage to be the leader. Reesville Road was recommended to us by Brian and Karen and it was well worth it – just like an English country lane. We arrived at Woodford for lunch to be joined by Alister and Christina on their bike and Chris who was on her way home from an obviously wild girls night out in Brisbane as she joined us for lunch in skimpy denim shorts. After great food and a relaxing hour chatting away it was very handy that Chris arrived in her car as she was able to transport the large meat tray home from the pub that Kathy won. After a quick fuel stop we had a nice ride home in the sunshine via Caboolture, Old Gympie Road, back to our house in Mountain Creek for a final drink and nibblies before everyone headed home. After the miserable week of weather it was great to get out and enjoy some decent weather and good company. We hope everyone enjoyed themselves and look forward to doing it again soon. Glenn Trusler 58001 Kathy Hytche 60823 PS : Just like to point out that we managed NOT to loose our tail end Charlie!!!!

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Thoughts on the Adelaide Region

I have spent nearly four weeks in a district of the Adelaide Hills called Ironbank, a quiet area just a few hilly, winding kilometres from Stirling - itself a delightful, heavily treed township less than a half-hour drive east of Adelaide City. I'm on my way to Mildura for this year's Ulysses AGM, having previously spent three glorious months in Tasmania. On returning to the mainland, I had purposely taken the opportunity to ride the Great Ocean Road (east to west) - my first time - and then to visit a fellow Ulyssian and house-sitter, Louise (who I had not previously met but) with whom I had maintained a contact via email and phone, swapping and feeding house-sits over the past two years.

Our paths had come close on a couple of previous occasions but my arrival at her place was our first face-to-face contact. I was made very welcome and, after a few days of rain (which made settling in quick and easy), it cleared sufficiently for us to begin building her long-awaited car port. Louise does a lot of volunteer work and is a keen lawn bowler, so she was out a lot during my stay. She helped when she could - though I was just as happy on my own - there was no rush and with regu-larly sunny and warm to hot days, a few hours a day was enjoyable, just enough to stop it being a chore.

I was able to spend some of my time riding solo around the City, the Hills and the Fleurieux Peninsular, as well as having one delightful day out with Louise and the Lower Murray Ulysses Branch as well as another with just Louise, where she showed me the quieter of the quiet back roads in the area. We also took advantage of the Adelaide Cup Public Holiday, catching (free for seniors!) bus and tram to sightsee Glenelg, Adelaide City and to catch just a taste of this year's Festival, as well as a day out at the Mount Pleasant Show - interestingly country rather than the more common commercial event! The car port was completed in roughly eight half-days and after one or two other 'blokey' jobs, it was time to organise when to leave for Mildura and which way was I to go to get there.

I was reflecting earlier today on my time here. It really is beautiful country, very hilly, very densely foliaged and very green yet, from time to time, there are indications of the danger that living here entails - the very real risk of bush fire. Simply being here, I soon became aware of how easy it would be to become trapped and/or disorientated were flame or smoke to suddenly intrude. The roads in this immediate vicinity are narrow, winding and quite steep in places - one stun-ningly dramatic vista after another on fine days. However, I would be apprehensive (to say the least) were I to be here for the 'bush fire season.' Although it's been just a few weeks, I already become very aware of the local CFS fire siren sounding - even on a test! Adelaide is supposed to the city of churches and whilst I agree that there do seem to be a lot, modern buildings in the city have dwarfed many of them to the point where they no longer have pride of place on the skyline. Even so, they, and the houses in the Adelaide area, are well-built and solid; mostly stone or brick, with classic lines, demonstrat-ing a kind of permanence that is not symptomatic in other states except, possibly, Tasmania.

Were I to take a photo directly along many of the main streets of Stirling, Aldgate or Harndorf, for example, it would ap-pear to be just a country lane with a lot of cars and an occasional bus. All of the commercial and retail businesses in the small townships in this area are snuggled behind and between trees. Car parking is away in service areas and behind the main street. It's a pleasure to walk around these places - arcades are a big thing too. It is definitely a conservative area here - 'nice' houses, cars, shops, people. By way of comparison, In a crowd of motor bikes (and old though it is), mine holds it's own quite well. In this neck of the woods, it stands out as the only motorbike!

But I've enjoyed it all - they've even got me carrying my own shopping bags (no supermarket plastic bags) and looking out on roadsides for cartons/bottles/containers - 10c refund! I can assure you that, as a result, there's no litter around!

Ride safe,

Tony (Maverick) Woolmer # 41777

Ps. The photo is of my lodgings here in

the Hills - a kind of 'attic apartment'

behind and over the little-used

workshop.

15

Women about men

Men are like Laxatives. They irritate the crap out of you.

Men are like Bananas . The older they get, the less firm they are.

Men are like Weather . Nothing can be done to change them.

Men are like Blenders You need one, but you're not quite sure why.

Men are like Chocolate Bars ... Sweet, smooth, & they usually head right for your hips.

Men are like Commercials . You can't believe a word they say.

Men are like Department Stores ... Their clothes are always 1/2 off!

Men are like .Government Bonds .... They take soooooo long to mature.

Men are like .. Mascara . They usually run at the first sign of emotion.

Men are like Popcorn . They satisfy you, but only for a little while.

Men are like Snowstorms . You never know when they're coming, how many inches you'll get or

how long it will last.

Men are like Lava Lamps . Fun to look at, but not very bright.

Baptist Cowboy

A cowboy, who just moved to Wyoming from Texas , walks into a bar and orders three mugs of beer. He sits in

the back of the room, drinking a sip out of each one in turn. When he finishes them, he comes back to the bar

and orders three more.

The bartender approaches and tells the cowboy, "You know, a mug goes flat after I draw it. It would taste bet-

ter if you bought one at a time."

The cowboy replies, "Well, you see, I have two brothers. One is in Arizona , the other is in Colorado . When we

all left our home in Texas , we promised that we'd drink this way to remember the days when we drank to-

gether. So I'm drinking one beer for each of my brothers and one for myself."

The bartender admits that this is a nice custom, and leaves it there.

The cowboy becomes a regular in the bar, and always drinks the same way. He orders three mugs and drinks

them in turn.

One day, he comes in and only orders two mugs. All the regulars take notice and fall silent. When he comes

back to the bar for the second round, the bartender says, "I don't want to intrude on your grief, but I wanted to

offer my condolences on your loss."

The cowboy looks quite puzzled for a moment, then a light dawns in his eyes and he laughs.

"Oh, no, everybody's just fine," he explains, "It's just that my wife and I joined the Baptist Church and I had to

quit drinking."

"Hasn't affected my brothers though."

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RIDE REPORT Sunday 11th March

Lake Baroon North and South. Its not often that the sun is shining over Montville and it’s raining on the coast , but today was one of those days. Early in the morning I received a distressed text from a Honda rider claiming that the ride should under no circumstances go ahead , apparently Hondas dissolve in the rain ! I assured the rider (who shall remain nameless) that this was a myth and we set off to the Etta where 19 bikes were ready to pounce. We had 2 new riders Annalise on a very nice Kawasaki as well as Murray on an good old Yammy xs 650 and I have only seen this in the movies but he kick started the bike ! They say the old ones are the best and as I get older I fully endorse this view. All the planets were in alignment today as Geoff and Elaine were present , Geoff on the bike and Elaine in the car. You know the Ulysses club is about us all getting out there and being part of it , you don’t have to ride a bike , you just have to love bikes. Good on yer Geoff and Elaine , I hope we see more members rocking up on a Sunday in cars to be with us and enjoy the friendship and camaraderie . So Today we had two tail end Charlies, Elaine in the car and John n Linda on the trike, nothing gonna go wrong today no way, pretty clever hey ! well we were just getting in to the swing of things when we lost both tail end charlies and a few other bikes as well ! We were half way up to Maleny and they were near Australia zoo CRIKEY! We finally got them back and made our way to “Secrets on the lake” in Montville for smoko , it’s a great place, we were treated to a tour of the cabins by George the owner. If you haven’t been there it’s a lovely spot for lunch . Through Mapleton, Yandina and Kenliworth we charged, onward to Lake Baroon The Glass house Mountain Ulysses club was there too and a few familiar faces, of course Geoff and Elaine knew them all. It was a good day, we missed the rain , no one fell off and the ride ended peacefully at the Etta . See you next Sunday , stay safe Mark.

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Sunday Ride 11th March

2012

18

ADVANCE HEALTH DIRECTIVE

The following is the form I've filled out. It seems to make a lot of sense. Feel free to use it if you wish. Uwe, #5041

I, ____________, being of sound mind and body, do not wish to be kept alive indefinitely by artificial means. Under no circumstances should my fate be put in the hands of pinhead partisan politicians who couldn't pass ninth-grade biology if their lives depended on it, or lawyers/doctors/hospitals interested in simply running up the bills. If a reasonable amount of time passes, and I fail to ask for at least one of the following: ______a Bourbon ______a Margarita ____ a Gin and Tonic ______a Bloody Mary ______a glass of red wine _______a Tee Time ______a Steak ______Lobster or crab legs ______the remote control ______a bowl of ice cream ______the Sports Page _____Sex ______or Chocolate ______, it should be presumed that I won't ever get any better. When such a deter-mination is reached, I hereby instruct my appointed person and attend-ing physicians to pull the plug, reel in the tubes, and call it a day. At this point, it is time to call Alistair and his Band to come do their thing at my funeral, and ask all of my friends to raise their glasses to toast the good times we’ve had. Signature:__________________________ Date: ___________ NOTE: I also hear that in Ireland they have a Nursing Home with a Pub. The patients are happier, they have a lot more visitors, and some of them don't even need embalming when their time comes...

On the farm lived a chicken and a horse, both of whom loved to play together. One day the two were playing, when the horse fell into a bog and began to sink. Scared for his life, the horse whinnied for the chicken to go get the farmer for help! Off the chicken ran, back to the farm. Arriving at the farm, he searched and searched for the farmer, but to no avail, for he had gone to town with the only tractor. Running around, the chicken spied the farmer's new Harley. Finding the keys in the ignition, the chicken sped off with a length of rope hoping he still had time to save his friend's life. Back at the bog, the horse was surprised, but happy, to see the chicken arrive on the shiny Harley, and he managed to get a hold of the loop of rope the chicken tossed to him. After tying the other end to the rear bumper of the farmer's bike, the chicken then drove slowly forward and, with the aid of the powerful bike, rescued the horse! Happy and proud, the chicken rode the Harley back to the farmhouse, and the farmer was none the wiser when he returned. The friendship between the two animals was cemented: Best Buddies, Best Pals. A few weeks later, the chicken fell into a mud pit, and soon, he too, began to sink and cried out to the horse to save his life! The horse thought a moment, walked over, and straddled the large puddle. Looking underneath, he told the chicken to grab his hangy-down thingy (Yeah, that's exactly what I would have called it too..) and he would then lift him out of the pit. The chicken got a good grip, and the horse pulled him up and out, saving his life. The moral of the story? (yep, you betcha, there is a moral!) 'When You're Hung Like A Horse, You Don't Need A Harley To Pick Up Chicks'

A HORSE, A CHICKEN and a HARLEY

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Nymboida. May 2012, Sun 6th , Mon 7Th, Tues 8th. Destination - Nymboida Coaching station Inn. Three full days of motorcycle riding, staying 2 nights at the historical Inn owned by Russell Crow, in a delightful setting on the banks of the Nymboida River, about 30 klms south of Grafton . Also the “museum of interesting things” Meals available 6 – 8 pm, with some nice beers on tap too. http://www.coachingstation.com/Home.htm This is a Queens land long weekend so only one day off work would be required (the Inn will be booked out on Friday and Saturday nights) Day 1: Meet at the Etta, departure time TBA , staying off the main highways and freeways where possible , riding down through Somerset dam and the beautiful Boarder Ranges via the Lions road . Day 2: Ride south to Belligen via the Waterfall way , Coffs harbour , Grafton and back to Nymbioda . Or you can choose have a rest day at the inn and try some of the local activities. Day 3: Return through the boarder ranges via Chillingham , Natural bridge and Tamborine. Camping or cabins are available about 3 klms from the inn at the Nymboida canoe centre , situated on the banks of Goolang Creek . http://www.nymboidacanoecentre.com/index.htm Prices at the inn range from $70 to $120, some rooms can sleep up to 6 people , spa rooms and river views available. Prices for camping start from $8 and multiple bed cabins from $21. You will be riding some of the best roads in the region, including at least 10 of the Australia top 200 rides as described in the Hema motorcycle atlas (ride numbers 4,7,9,24,120,36,117,10,8,110) and anything else we can find . What you need to do if you want to go ,

1. Telephone or go on line to book your accommodation for Sunday the 6th of May and Monday the 7th of May 2012. Let them know you are with the Sunshine coast Ulysses club.

2. Book your day off work if necessary. 3. Let Mark or Heather know that you’re in ,

Nymboida Coaching Station Inn, 3970 Armidale Road, Nymboida, NSW, 2470 Telephone (02) 6649 412 Nymboida Canoe Centre, Armidale Road Nymboida , NSW 2460 Phone/Fax (02) 6649 4155 For any further information please contact Mark on 0413205490 or [email protected]

UPCOMING RIDE

HOUSE SITTING

WHENEVER PRACTICAL, I WILL GO ANYWHERE IN AUSTRALIA TO HOUSE SIT FOR ANYONE NEEDING MY HOUSE SITTING SERVICE. I SPECIALISE IN PERIODS OF A MONTH OR MORE. NO MONEY CHANGES HANDS. YOUR HOUSE,PETS,PLANTS, AND ANYTHING ELSE OF VALUE IS CARED FOR JUST AS YOU WOULD DO. I AM A SELF CONTAINED, SELF SUFFICIENT TRAVELLER. I CAN BE CONTACTED VIA : Mobile: 0448 966 246 Email: [email protected] TONY WOOLMER #41777 (Note: Available now for bookings from early September 2012 )

Thanks to

Mark & Heather Uwe Tony

Kathy & Glenn

For their input in this newsletter with articles and photos

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Hello everybody , here is the Final Itinerary for the Nymboida run , its looking like we will have a ball , dont forget to find out a photo of when you were a toddler so we can play "guess the baby".

Day 1 Approx 540 kms 6.30 am Meet at Etta, ride briefing. 7.00 am Prompt departure. 9.00 am 150 kms Morning smoko, (30mins) @ Fernvale historic ,petrol fill. Boonah, short stop . Decide on lunch, phone order to the Rathy hotel. 2.00 pm 288kms Rathdowney , lunch at Rathy hotel , Petrol fill (1 hour) Kyogle via the lions road short stop Whiporie, shortstop petrol fill. Grafton petrol fill (tanks need to be full for the next day as there is no petrol station at Nymboida) 5 pm arrive Nymboida , rest, shower or spa , meet for pre dinner drinks about 6.30 pm. entertainment provided for the evening . Note ! A continental breakfast is included in the room rates , if you prefre a cooked breakfast please see the Inn staff the prior evening . Day 2 Aprox 294 km This days ride is optional , if you want you can relax at the inn or try some of the local activities at the canoe canter. 9 am Depart after breakfast and the ride briefing. Ride south toward Armidale then on to the Waterfall way 11.30 am approx 108kms Dorrigo , coffee at the worlds smallest motorcycle museum , take a quick look at the water falls . Petrol fill at Bellengen. 1 pm 185 km lunch, Coffs harbour, at the deep sea fishing club . Ride back to the coaching Inn via The Orara Way and Glenreagh. Petrol fill at Coutts Crossing tanks full for an early start in the morning. 4.30 pm 294kms Arrive Nymboida, time to look at the museum of interesting things , relax , meet for pre dinner drinks about 6.30 pm , Trivia quiz after dinner . Guess the baby competition . Day 3 approx 600 km 8 am Depart after breakfast and ride briefing . 150 kms Casino short break and petrol fill . 10.15 am 200kms Nimbin for brunch and a look around (45 mins) Tyalgum , chillingham, Numinbah valley. Note ! at this point you have a choice , if for you the ride is too long , you can get on the freeway at Nerang and be home in 1.45 hrs 157 kms. The freeway is boring and you may hit the rush hour traffic Or soldier on with us . Canunga afternoon tea, Beaudesert , Somerset dam home hopefully before 6pm .

Please find a photo of yourself as a toddler so we can play guess the baby , all the photos will be dis-played and we have to guess who the photo belongs to . Recommended things to do and bring . Your bike is serviced and reliable Check your tyres, replace if in doubt Have a plan should your bike break down Do you need to take some engine oil with you ? Medication. A spare key . Sun block. Sunnies. Plastic bags to put over your socks because your water proof boots leak. Wet weather gear, it will rain. Nymboida Itinerary cont.

CONTINUED

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Warm gear (it gets cold south of the border) Phone charger. Favourite toys (dominoes, cards, marbles etc) batteries if required . Camera. Preferred Hangover medication . Sleeping pills will not be necessary , you will be completely buggered . A road atlas. Ride leaders telephone number (0413205490) Did you turn off the Iron and the stove ? A sense of humour and a desire to have fun. Bikers hint ! one pair of undies can be used for up to 8 days , Day 1 normal Day 2 back to front Day 3 inside out and normal Day 4 inside out and back to front Day 5,6,7,8, swap undies with your partner (or a close friend) and repeat steps 1,2 ,3 and 4.

Stuff that would be good GPS CB radio. An intercom. Air hawk seat covers. Some way to play music on the ride. A Teddy. Please feel free to add to the list as you see fit .

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BUSINESS DIRECTORYBUSINESS DIRECTORYBUSINESS DIRECTORYBUSINESS DIRECTORY

ERIC & LYN FORD

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Alistairs Gig Guide Caloundra Bowls Club Sunday 8th April 3.00—6.00pm Nambour RSL Wednesday 11th April 6.00 - 10.00pm Kawana Bowls Club Friday 13th April 6.20—11.00pm Caloundra Bowls Club Sunday 22nd April 3.00—6.00 Caloundra RSL Sunday 29th April 6.30 - 10.30pm Kawana Bowls Club Friday 11th May 6.20 - 11.00pm Maroochy Surf Club Friday 25th May 7.30—11.00pm Bribie Island RSL Saturday 26th May 8.00 - 12.00pm Caloundra RSL Thursday 7th June 6.30 - 10.30pm Caloundra Bowls Club Friday 8th June 6.30 - 10.30pm Caboolture Sports Club Friday 22nd June 8.00 - 12.00pm Maroochy Surf Club Fri 20th July 7.30 - 11.00pm Bribie Island RSL Saturday 11th August 8.00 - 12.00pm

Social Night at Surf Air Tavern

- Marcoola

3rd Tuesday of every month Come and enjoy a meal and

social night with other mem-bers

All Welcome

BRANCH FUNDED BBQ

Cnr Reserve St & Memo-

rial Ave Pomona

SUNDAY 29TH APRIL

12 noon

Members—free Non members $5

COFFEE / BREAKFAST MORNING

Saturday 14th April

La Promenade Café

4 Tay Avenue Caloundra

8 - 8.30 am

BREAKFAST / COFFEE MORNING

Saturday April 28th

@

BANJO’S Shop 409 Plaza Pde

Maroochydore

8 - 8.30 am

Social Weekend Ride. Childers , June 23rd 2012. Ride leaders Clive and Gail mob 0412488070 or 54769435, [email protected] Approximately 700 kms (total) Staying at the Palace Motel ,Childers. $95 per night , and a smorgasbord breakfast for just $13. What You need to do , call the Palace Hotel and book your room . for Saturday 23rd June 2012, saying you are with Clive and Gail and the sunshine coast Ulysses club. Tell Clive or Gail that you have booked Palace motel 07 41262244 http://childerspalacemotel.com/ Or if you prefer camping, the sugar bowl caravan park 07 4126 1521 http://www.sugarbowlchilders.com/index.html Sat 23 rd approx 400 kms Meet at the Etta 7.30, Depart 8 am prompt Smoko, Chantilly Blue Café Kilcoy. Lunch, Kingaroy ,Carrollee Hotel . Arrive Childers approx 3 – 4 pm. Evening meal, Grand Hotel. Sunday 24th. Approx 300 kms. Smorgasbord Breakfast at the motel , leisurely departure. Return via Biggenden and Maryborough. Lunch Silky Oaks Tea Gardens.

SATURDAY 21st APRIL

VELVET WATERS

ROCK & ROLL

97 Bulcock St Caloundra

Dinner & Show $79 p/p

Licensed Bar Please call Kathy

0410452359 ASAP to book

Kathy has details on accom for caravan

park if needed 6.30pm prompt

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Ride details:

Sun 08 April Apollonian Hotel, Boreen Point Depart: Ettamogah Pub 8:30am Smoko: Bellbird Cafe Kenilworth Lunch: Apollonian Hotel, Boreen Point Ride Leader: Mark & Heather 0413205490 Approx 250km.

April 2012

Sun Mon Tue Wed Thu Fri Sat

1 2 3

Social Meeting Kawana

4 5 6 7

2012 Rebel Fm Pigs Arse

Poker Run

8

Social Ride - Boreen Point

9 10

11

M/week Ride 9am

12 13 14 B/fast @

La Promenade Caloundra 8 - 8.30am

15 Social Ride -

Bullocky Rest, Lake Samson-

ville

16 17

Surfair Tavern Social

18

M/week Ride 9am

19 20 21

Rock ‘n’ Roll At

Velvet Waters

22 TBA

23 24

25

M/week Ride 9am

26 27 28 B/fast @ Banjos Maroochydore

8 - 8.30am

29 Branch BBQ

Pomona

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All rides commence at 8.30am from the Ettamogah unless otherwise specified

Midweek Rides (every Wednesday): Meet at the Etta for a 9am departure. Come along for an easy, half-day cruise around our fantastic coast and hinterland and enjoy plenty of time out for socialising. Please phone Bruce on 5494 7656 if you would like to join in..

Sun 15 April Bullocky Rest, Lake Samsonville Depart: Ettamogah Pub 8:30am Smoko: Donnybrook foreshore Lunch: BYO Picnic by the lake Ride Leader: Mark & Heather 0413205490 Approx 200 kms ride ends Beerwah Tavern.

Sun 29 April – Social Ride – Branch BBQ Pomona Depart: Etta 8:30am Smoko: TBA Lunch: Branch BBQ at Pomona Ride Leader: Ken Prescott 0419 148 136

pelican brief -...

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