SUGGESTED ANSWERS:

Value #1 - Be Intentional

Value #2 - Pray With Hope

Value #3 - Reach Beyond Our Walls

And now, finally, Value #4 - Speak God’s Truth in Love

Our mission is “Building bridges that connect people to a passionate life in Christ”

Week # 7 - Oct 28/29 - FALL 2017

Pi l lars of Inf luence: Speak God’s Truth In Love

Ephesians 4

LEA

DE

R’S

GU

IDE

GETTING STARTED > As your group time begins, use this section for very brief review prior to showing the video to help get the conversation going.

Conversation Starters/Questions

What would you say to someone you love, if you had one last chance to say goodbye,

knowing that you would never see them again? (This is what Paul had to do in Acts 20)

Can you list our first 3 Mission Values (Pillars of Influence) from memory? We encourage

everyone to be able to recall these at any time.

Can you state our Mission Statement?

VIDEO NOTES >Play Video

APPLICATION QUESTIONS Read Ephesians 4:1-13

1) What does it mean to live a life worthy of the calling with which you have been called? Why is unity so important in our church today? How can we use our spiritual gifts to speak God’s truth in love?

SUGGESTED ANSWERS: Living worthy of the calling is: based on the first 3 chapters of Ephesians and the benefits we receive because of Christ, a response of gratitude and worship, demonstrated by humility, gentleness, patience, and unity-keeping. Unity demonstrates that all Christians are one body in Christ and have a common witness to the world. Our spiritual gifts enable us to give to other believers what they need in order to grow, to help build the body of Christ, His church, and prepare His bride for His return.

LEA

DE

R’S

GU

IDE

APPLICATION QUESTIONS (cont.)

Week # 7 - Oct 28/29 - FALL 2017 Page 2

Read Ephesians 4: 14-16

2) If we are no longer children or infants in our spiritual maturity but adults, how do we as “mature” in Christ speak the truth in love to others who are not “mature”? If love is the fuel of the church, how can we speak love to others to grow the church?

Read Ephesians 4:29

3) Is your motive to build others up or tear them down? How can we learn to only speak words to build people up? How do unwholesome words affect our witness?

4) According to Ephesians 4:1-32, what are the requirements or characteristics needed for a person to truly speak the truth in love?

FOLLOW-UP QUESTIONS: 1. How do children differ from adults? Children are: dependent, ignorant, enthusiastic, easily disillusioned, selfish. Adults are: Intentional, more aware of truth, able to care for themselves (yet enjoy interdependent relationships), desire to care for others. 2. How can we become more mature in our faith? 3. Who are we to love? Enemies (Matt 5:43,44), other believers (Heb 13:1) all persons (James 2:8). 4. Who is our example of love? Jesus (Rom 5:6-8) 5. What is the source of love? The Lord (John 15:9) 6. How do we get love? Recognize it’s a choice (1 Peter 3:8), Obey by faith (John 15:12), Reject those things we are not to love (1 John 2: 15,16).

SUGGESTED ANSWERS: Pure love comes from pure motives which come from pure hearts. (1 Peter 1:22). If you sense that your motives are not pure, wait. Keep praying until you can say it in love. Repent of any thoughts or deeds that are keeping you from being able to pass on God’s love to others. (1 John 4:20, 21) Remind yourself of the truth you have been taught (Proverbs 19:27; 1 Timothy 1:5). Remind yourself of the love God showed you. (1 John 3:16). Remember, unloving words kill the spirit (Prov 12: 18; Matthew 5:21,22)

SUGGESTED ANSWERS: Verse 1: In order to live in a worthy manner, we must understand the benefits we have received by being in Christ. These were explained in chapters 1-3. The characteristics flow out of our identity in Christ. Humility, gentleness, patience, bearing with others. The goal is to maintain unity and peace. This person serves others (vs. 16) puts on the new self (vs. 24), speaks only words that benefit others (vs. 29), and guards his own heart (vs. 31-32).

SUMMARY (My Take-Away for This Week)

LEA

DE

R’S

GU

IDE

APPLICATION QUESTIONS (cont.)

Week # 7 - Oct 28/29 - FALL 2017 Page 3

Read James 5:19-20

5) What does James tell us to do with those who have wandered away from the truth?

6) Can someone share a time when someone spoke the truth in love to you and how it impacted you?

ANSWER: Go after them. Remembering the goal helps us continue even when the discussion may be uncomfortable or tense. God’s discipline is necessary for godliness and peace. (Hebrews 12:3-15)

FOLLOW-UP QUESTIONS: 1. What is the purpose? Restoration. 2. What are the results of restoration? Salvation and sins are covered. 3. Who is to go after them? God wants to use all of us to go after them. 4. What part does prayer have in restoring others? (James 5: 13-18).

FOLLOW-UP QUESTIONS: Expect that group members will have stories of when the other person handled the situation well and when they didn’t. Remember 1 Cor 2: 11. It is impossible for us to read the mind of another person. Regardless of how well or poorly the conversation went, we need to take the issue to the Father and allow Him to clarify the truth for us and give us the strength to change if needed.

If we all speak the truth in love, we will all grow up spiritually.

I need to check my motives and my own heart before I speak truth to others.

Speaking the truth in love is worth the cost.

WORK OUT (This Week’s Assignments) Do you feel like we are building healthy relationship within our LIFEgroup?

Would you say your group has experienced life change?

LEA

DE

R’S

GU

IDE

Week # 7 - Oct 28/29 - FALL 2017 Page 4

MY NEXT STEPS

1. This week, I will take time to examine my own life before speaking to others.

2. This week, I will ask the Lord to bring people into my life that will speak God’s truth in love

and that I can in turn speak God’s truth in love to them.

3. This week, I will take time to thank the people that took the risk to speak the truth in love

to me.

4. This week, I will memorize Ephesians 4:15, Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will in

all things grow up into him who is the Head, that is, Christ.

HOW MY GROUP CAN PRAY FOR ME THIS WEEK

> Record Group Prayer Request Here:

_______________________________________________________________

_______________________________________________________________

_______________________________________________________________

_______________________________________________________________

_______________________________________________________________

_______________________________________________________________

_______________________________________________________________

_______________________________________________________________

_______________________________________________________________

_______________________________________________________________

_______________________________________________________________

_______________________________________________________________

_______________________________________________________________

_______________________________________________________________

_______________________________________________________________

_______________________________________________________________

_______________________________________________________________

_______________________________________________________________

_______________________________________________________________

LEA

DE

R’S

GU

IDE

COMMENTARY

Week # 7 - Oct 28/29 - FALL 2017 Page 5

Pillar of Influence #1: Be Intentional

Pillar of Influence #2: Pray With Hope

Pillar of Influence #3: Reach Beyond Our Walls

Pillar of Influence #4: Speak the Truth in Love

Question 1. Eph 4:1: Then refers back to the entire first three chapters of the book. Because of all that God has done for us in providing salvation and making us into a spiritual dwelling place of God in the spirit, a dwelling place in which Jew and Gentile are united as one, we should live like the people we have become. (Max Anders, Galatians-Colossians, vol. 8, Holman New Testament Commentary *Nashville, TN: Broadman & Holman Publishers, 1999+)

That ye may walk worthy. This is a general sentiment, a sort of preface, on which all the following statements are founded. He had formerly illustrated the calling with which they were called, and now reminds them that they must live in obedience to God, in order that they may not be unworthy of such distinguished grace. (John Calvin and William Pringle, Commentaries on the Epistles of Paul to the Galatians and Ephesians *Bellingham, WA: Logos Bible Software, 2010+) Eph 4:2: Humility means to see yourself as God sees you: with infinite and inherent value but with no more value than anyone else. Gentleness or meekness literally means “power under control. Patience is believing God’s timetable is good, no matter what it is. Patience is waiting for God to act when, where, and how God chooses. Forbearance in love is the willingness to put up with something or someone in a spirit of love—agape love, which is the commitment of my will to benefit another. (Max Anders, Galatians-Colossians, vol. 8, Holman New Testament Commentary *Nashville, TN: Broadman & Holman Publishers, 1999+)

Eph 4:3: Christian unity: Christian unity is founded on each Christian’s commitment to the one God. Paul also prayed for unity in the church and often exhorted believers to maintain oneness. His prayers identify the basis of unity as the one Father, the work of the one Spirit, and believers’ common bond to Christ (Rom 15:5–6; Eph 4:3–6; Phil 2:1–2). It is important because it glorifies the Father and the Son. Thus it is appropriate for believers, and it provides a witness to unbelievers (Rom 5:6–7). (David S. Dockery et al., Holman Bible Handbook *Nashville, TN: Holman Bible Publishers, 1992+) Some consider the unity of the Spirit to mean that spiritual unity which is produced in us by the Spirit of God. There can be no doubt that He alone makes us “of one accord, of one mind,” (Phil. 2:2,) and thus makes us one; but I think it more natural to understand the words as denoting harmony of views. This unity, he tells us, is maintained by the bond of peace; for disputes frequently give rise to hatred and resentment. We must live at peace, if we would wish that brotherly kindness should be permanent amongst us. (John Calvin and William Pringle, Commentaries on the Epistles of Paul to the Galatians and Ephesians *Bellingham, WA: Logos Bible Software, 2010+)

Question 2. Eph 4:14-16. Speaking the truth in love is a mark of maturity, which will enable us to grow up spiritually. Immature people often fall into one of two opposite errors. They speak the truth, but without love, or they love without speaking the truth. When we do the first, we often brutalize others. When we do the second, we don’t tell others the truth, thinking that by shielding them from the truth we are sparing them from pain. All we are doing is delaying their maturation. (Max Anders, Galatians-Colossians, vol. 8, Holman New Testament Commentary *Nashville, TN: Broadman & Holman Publishers, 1999+)

LEA

DE

R’S

GU

IDE

COMMENTARY

Week # 7 - Oct 28/29 - FALL 2017 Page 6

Question 2. (cont)

Truth: Because God’s word is truth, it is ultimately real and not ephemeral, as opposed to all else, and liberates men (John 8:32). Satan and men lie (John 8:44; Rom. 1:25) and enslave. Jesus is Savior because He is Truth incarnate (John 14:6; cp. 1:14, 17; Eph. 4:21). Now the Holy Spirit indwells believers, guiding them into all truth (John 14:17; 15:26; 16:13; cp. 1 John 5:6).

Yet people resist truth. Jesus implied this, “Because I tell the truth, you do not believe Me” (John 8:46 HCSB). The Bible teaches that believing truth is not a mechanical psychological function but is related to the human will. People choose the lie rather than God’s truth (Rom. 1:25; 2 Tim. 3:8; 4:4; Titus 1:14). In John 14:6 Jesus describes Himself as “the way, the truth, and the life,” combining a number of concepts. Jesus is the true way leading to life, and men should not come to Him seeking truth but, because He is the end of the search, the revealed reality of God. (Ted Cabal, “Truth,” ed. Chad Brand et al., Holman Illustrated Bible Dictionary *Nashville, TN: Holman Bible Publishers, 2003+)

Question 3. Eph 4:29. This is the Bible’s version of, “If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all.” We are to speak only words that build up and encourage others. This one passage, if consistently obeyed, would eliminate the overwhelming majority of life’s conflicts. Words of a mature Christian seek to help the listener, not harm him. Thus the ministerial gifts of Christ’s grace achieve their purposes, and the unity of the body of Christ is preserved and enhanced. (Max Anders, Galatians-Colossians, vol. 8, Holman New Testament Commentary *Nashville, TN: Broadman & Holman Publishers, 1999+)

Filthy words proceed from corruption in the speaker, and they corrupt the minds and manners of those who hear them: Christians should beware of all such discourse. It is the duty of Christians to seek, by the blessing of God, to bring persons to think seriously, and to encourage and warn believers by their conversation. (Matthew Henry and Thomas Scott, Matthew Henry’s Concise Commentary *Oak Harbor, WA: Logos Research Systems, 1997+)

Question 4. Ephesians is the perfect balance between doctrine and duty. The first three chapters deal with doctrine, the believers’ spiritual blessings in Christ. The last three chapters focus on the church’s responsibility to live in unity, variety, maturity, purity, and victory. We learn from Paul’s balanced perspective the need for both orthodoxy (right belief) and orthopraxy (right living).

Commentators have suggested that the pivotal verse of the entire letter—indeed, the key that unlocks its structure—is 4:1. It brings together the themes of chapters 1–3 and in a stirring appeal announces Paul’s emphasis of chapters 4–6. The church’s privileged position and calling carries with it weighty responsibilities. Paul exhorted the church to worthy living. He emphasized the character and effort required for such exemplary living. Then with characteristic Trinitarian emphasis the apostle claimed the church could so live because it is energized by the Spirit, established by the Lord, and empowered by the Father. (David S. Dockery, “The Pauline Letters,” in Holman Concise Bible Commentary, ed. David S. Dockery *Nashville, TN: Broadman & Holman Publishers, 1998+)

Question 5. As realistic as James was about stumbling and straying from the truth into sin, he presupposed that the church would be in a constant state of readiness to minister restoration to any who do so. Since one’s own evil desires readily drag him away into sin (cf. 1:14–15), a believer should not condemn (4:11–12) but seek the wayward and bring them to effective restoration through the mercy of God (cf. 2:13). This final charge involves a ministry of bringing back, of restoration. The believer who brings restoration becomes an instrument of those inexhaustible gifts to those who will listen and return to the way of truth. (Kurt A. Richardson, James, vol. 36, The New American Commentary *Nashville: Broadman & Holman Publishers, 1997+)

(Quotations used by permission of publisher or are Public Domain)