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Your presenter is:

Alison Sigmon, M.Ed., LPC, PMP

Walk the Talk on ProjectsEffective communication that goes the distance

http://www.nicabm.com/nicabmblog/building-a-brain-science-community/

What’s on tap for our time together today…

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Change is all around us revisited

There’s function and then there’s form

Dialogue, active listening, being present, and defining the problem

make the functional tools of communication work

Tips for riding the wave of discomfort when communicating

Wrap it up!

Agenda

The desire to have “Improved communication skills” emerges repeatedly on

surveys and research as an ability critical to project success, and yet we all

continue to feel challenged by it! Tons of published research and books provide

great resource, but often leave us still struggling for how to effectively

communicate.

This webinar will consider what gets in the way of effective communication and

provide tips and techniques for project communication that works.

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Project change –

Revisited

Impact on you and others

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From strategy to reports to

documentation to relationships, project

managers experience a bevy of

challenges that require a wide range of

skills.

Work through others to get work done

Get results in nearly impossible

conditions and situations

Manage without authority

Spend 80 to 90 percent of time

communicating

Navigate and leverage politics

Build and support project relationships

Facilitate stakeholder interaction and

contributions

Analyze data

Sell ideas and solutions

Manage conflict

Juggling never ends

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Things can get REALLY complicated!

And when you think about the communication needed…

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Complication with communicating can be

reduced when we consider functional aspects

of it…

Audience. Subject Matter Expert? Executive?

Executives usually want the Cliff Notes. They care

about the problem, opportunity, and benefits. SMEs

like to go deep on details.

Right person, right time. No one wants to waste

time so making sure you’re talking to the right person

is imperative.

Appropriate cadence and content. Too much

information and pacing of communication can kill

progress.

Relationship. What’s your relationship with the

stakeholder? History – good or challenged?

Best tool for the job. Pick a medium that is suitable

for the communication.

That’s it???...Um, nope.

One side of the coin…

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Other side of the coin…

Planning, picking tools, selecting the right person are all important to the

mechanics of the communication process.

What makes it effective is how you manage it. That’s where the magic

happens, and it all starts with form – that is, the WAY you do it…

http://www.geeky-gadgets.com/stress-ball-dlight-12-02-2010/

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If communication was easy, we

wouldn’t need all the books,

articles, coaching sessions,

and webinars like this to do it!

So what will help? Good

form. That begins with…

• Aiming for dialogue

• Listening actively

• Being present

• Seeking to understand

Being in the moment…

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Center not sides…

Aim for dialogue

We think much faster than the

sender can speak which means

we tend to jump ahead.

This results in us focusing on how

to respond rather than REALLY

HEARING what the sender is

actually saying.

Dialogue is a conversation with

a center not sides. So how can

we effectively create that?

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We have to have a little understanding of ourselves and our

buttons. We also have to appreciate others have them too.

Feelings impact everyone, and people don’t stop having feelings

when they get to work.

Our emotional brain responds far faster than our logical self – 100

milliseconds as compared to 3.6 seconds for the rational brain.

This is why we can respond to situations seemingly without thinking.

While this can be helpful in a crisis situation, the reality is sometimes

we’re reacting without enough information, responding to our

anxious feeling, etc.

Science is showing that 40 to 50 percent of the time we are correct in

our assumptions about a situation, but you know what that means…

Responding with awareness

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Get out of your own way

In his book The Magic of Dialogue, Daniel

Yankelovich includes a list titled “Potholes of the

Mind” to highlight some of the things that can get in

the way of effective dialogue.

• Holding back – withholding information

• Being locked in a box – stuck on a specific idea and

can’t move beyond it

• Prematurely moving to action – seeking solutions

without fully understanding the problem

• Listening without hearing – multi-tasking

• Starting at different points – polarized thinking on the

situation

• Showboating – constantly trying to control

• Scoring debate points – competitive style

• Being contrary – sees only the negatives of a

situation

• Having a pet preoccupation – fixated on their

interested to the exclusion of others

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Overcoming obstacles by listening actively

Things get in the way. As a project manager your mission is to overcome obstacles by

listening with intention. And this means participating.

Project Managers spend up to 80 to 90 percent of their time communicating so resisting the

lure of multi-tasking isn’t always easy, but it’s one of the most important skills a project

manager.

This means project managers and stakeholders need to be deliberate and efficient when

communicating, and the best way to do that is to practice active listening.

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Mirror, mirror…

When practicing active listening,

the listener demonstrates

genuine interest in

understanding the sender’s

message.

• They ask clarifying questions

that are objective, reflective, and

interpretational in nature

• They paraphrase what they’ve

heard

• They reflect like a mirror to the

other person to demonstrate

understanding and empathy

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Whole person approach…

Active listening is a whole person experience

• When face-to-face the listener faces the sender, sits up right,

and maintains eye contact.

• Nodding and using facial expressions when appropriate lets the

sender know the listener is present.

• When on the phone, the listener focuses on the speaker,

responds with verbal acknowledgement as appropriate, and may

take notes to create references as the conversation progresses.

• Whether face-to-face or on the phone it’s important not to multi-

tasking. With the many demands on a project manager’s time,

she must be deliberate with putting them aside or risk losing the

confidence and trust of the sender.

• Give space. Some people assume to be active means one must

be talking. While asking questions and seeking understanding is

an aspect of active listening, sometimes just being present during

pauses and silence is all the support they need.

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Be present and accounted for…

Through active listening, we broaden

our understanding and perspective of a

situation.

Present listening, on the other hand,

takes it a step further by acknowledging

the barriers and emotional challenges

while looking for the things that can

support them in moving beyond it.

Assuming a balanced approach to the

supports and barriers helps all involved

feel less stuck and more empowered to

get on with the business of focusing the

issue, solving the problem, and

negotiating for the project.

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Walk a mile in their shoes…

Present listening happens when you are

truly interested in perspective taking or

“getting into the other person’s shoes.”

It happens when you convey that you truly

want to know what is going on with him or

her regarding a particular issue.

Present listening can help advance project

management activities faster.

• Set stakeholder expectations

• Create a problem definition

• Establish time, cost, and scope priorities

• Facilitate team involvement

• Problem solving and managing with conflict

• Make agreements with virtual team

members

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Path to solution is a solid definition

Before we can solve the problem

we need to know what it is.

Problem definition requires we

distinguish between causes and

symptoms and separating fact

from opinion.

Problems may be internal,

technical, managerial, or

interpersonal and they may be

multi-faceted.

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Big problems tend to have smaller problems

associated with it. So better to fish them out

than risk them growing larger.

It’s important to understand:

• What the issue is

• Why it’s important now

• Which aspect needs attention first

It’s not uncommon for stakeholders to have

different opinions on what is and is not a

problem particularly when functional areas

have different concerns.

What might be a problem for product

marketing might not be a problem at all for

IT. So good form as noted in the previous

slides can help us figure it out with our

stakeholders.

Bigger they are, harder they fall…

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The task is to get alignment on what the

problem is relative to the project. To get a

clear problem definition, it’s important to

do the following:

Recognize a problem exists. Always tie it

back to the objectives of the project and

what must be delivered.

Ask objective questions. These are fact-

focused questions used create context and

build mutual understanding. They are the

kind of questions an investigator asks –

who, what, when, where, how.

Give it a temporary definition. Sometimes

problems are so complex and large they are

hard to immediately define. Giving it a

temporary definition acts as a placeholder

further drill down through the information.

Synch up

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Don’t “boil the ocean” because you can solve everything every time. Picking the

right functional tools and practicing good form will go along way to effective

communication on projects.

There are a few other considerations as you move through the process…

The ocean is big and deep

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Living in the moment

Communication at it’s best is felt by

everyone involved. But…it becomes a

challenge when everyone is trying to

POSSESS and CONTROL it.

Remember that it’s not a competition.

Everyone loses in a communication

fail. Be in the moment by seeking to

understand, asking questions, and

demonstrating the other has been heard.

It might feel like challenging

communication moments will never end,

but they do and they will.

Just keep these tips in mind…

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Riding the wave

It’s temporary. Every interaction we have with others is

temporary. Knowing something will end can help us relax and

maybe even find something positive in the shared time. Attitude

can do wonders with making that glass seem a bit less

empty.

Take perspective. See them differently – not as a troublesome

stakeholder, but rather as another human being doing the best

they can with what they know. So are you.

Your advantage is you know better because you’re bothering to

participate in this webinar. As renowned poet Maya Angelou once

said, “When you know better, you do better.”

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Be different. You CAN’T change others but

you CAN change yourself and how you

interact with others. In relationships where

there’s poor or miscommunication there

are NO innocent parties.

Hello, Stranger. We tend to treat people we

DON’T know well better than the people we

DO know well. Talk with them as if you’re

talking with a stranger waiting in line or at an

airport. What you learn may just surprise

you.

Laugh. Life is short and that moment of

challenging communication is a millisecond

relative to your entire life. Take a step back

and pull the big picture into focus. If you

don’t look for the good, how can you find

it?

Take the long view

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Do no harm

Take the high road. Don’t let it be

personal even if it is. If you find

yourself on the receiving end of

criticisms and snide remarks about

you or someone else, ignore it. We

can only grow what we pay

attention to.

Lend support. If the situation is

tough on you, chances are your

stakeholder find it equally as hard.

Talk to each other about it. Make a

game plan. A gesture that tells

them they need to step in. When

you partner with stakeholders,

you avoid creating the drama.

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Keep the big picture in mind

It might be tempting to just “tell it like it

is” when communicating with project

stakeholders, but it’s not just about you so

think before you leap.

Stakeholders will be directly or indirectly

affected so before you take that path, step

back and consider the consequences.

Final note…if the potential for conflict is

too high in your communication, then it’s

okay to take a break, reach out to a

mentor or trusted peer, or recruit an

objective third party to facilitate.

At the end of the day it’s about acting with

the bigger picture in mind relative to the

project and the business.

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A PM’s work is never done…

Project managers wear a lot of hats that

require a variety of skills…

Analysis

Documentation

Budgeting

Communication

Teamwork

Intelligence

Steadiness

Time Management

Functional tools and good form go a long

way to your success with each of these.

Wrap up…

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Questions???

What we discussed

The desire to have “Improved communication skills” emerges repeatedly on

surveys and research as an ability critical to project success, and yet we all

continue to feel challenged by it! Tons of published research and books provide

great resource, but often leave us still struggling for how to effectively

communicate.

This webinar will consider what gets in the way of effective communication and

provide tips and techniques for project communication that works.

Change is all around us revisited

There’s function and then there’s form

Dialogue, active listening, being present, and defining the problem make

the functional tools of communication work

Tips for riding the wave of discomfort when communicating

Wrap it up!

Thank you!www.systemation.com

Alison Sigmon, M.Ed, LPC, PMPasigmon@systemation.com

Twitter @alisonsigmonwww.slideshare.net/ahsigmon

www.mindscraping.com

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