The Chinese University of Hong Kong – Tung Wah Group of Hospitals Community College

GE83003 Psychology and Personal Growth

The topic: Love

Date: 11th October 2011

Group membersCHAN HOI YING (10005665)

CHAN SUI YING (11015912)

CHEUNG TSZ YU (11013644)

LI NGAI PANG (09021733)

YEUNG CHEUK FUNG (10045809)

Mok Hei Man (11003017)

We all know that us, teenagers,

when we like someone, we immediately think is love. And who better to talk about

it, than a teenager!

Introduction

As a teenager…◦Being in serious relationship◦Serial dating◦Engage in sexual activity

Survey (sample)

1) How old are you?

10%

60%

30%

Years oldA. 18 to 19

B. 20 to 21

2) Are you male or female?

45%55%

Sex

A. Male

3) When did you go on your first real date?

10%

60%

25%

5%

TimelinePrimary SchoolSecondary SchoolUniversityNever

4) How many boyfriends or girlfriends have you had since

age 16?

20%

70%

10%

No. of lovers

A. 1 to 2

B. 3 to 4

5) Do you believe they can stay together through high school and college and get married?

45%

55%

Yes

No

6) Is it possible that people can fall in love with others without sex?

70%

30%

Impossible

Possible

7) Is that possible for you to concentrate on one partner?

40%

60%

A. Possible

B. Impossible

8) Is it feasible for you to have one night stand ?

55%

45%

A. Yes

B. No

The summary to this research

The results show that…

◦ Their first love usually appear in adolescence stage◦ They don’t believe the eternity of love◦ Majority of people think Love cannot without sex◦ They think one lover is not enough◦ They generally accept one night stand◦ They have 3 to 4 partners in common

News Clip (1)

News Clip(2)

Philosophy

Platonic LoveThe nature of human is better than

beastsnon-sexual affectionate relationshippure, spiritual affectionThe equality of men and womenThe lover think the opposite side is

perfect“ The better half”

News Clip (1)

News Clip (2)

Love view of Socrates

Beautiful Things

Beautiful Bodies

Beauty of the Pursuit and

Custom

Beauty of Learning

•The pursuit of beauty•The desire to have what one lacks and wants

The Story of Wheat fieldBy Socrates

•Ask Plato walk through the Wheat field•Condition : Cannot go back until finish the path•Plato got nothing from the field.•Socrates : This is the Love.

Love View of Socrates and Plato

Eros - Erotic Sensual Lovefull-feeling, juicy, sensual erotic

bodily attractionattracted to, are pulled by, want,

desire, lust for, long for.gives pleasure, fun, joy,

excitement.

1.Your Body

2. Other Bodies

3. Your Surroundings

4. Actions (yours, others', and events)

5. Relationships

ladder of love

6. Feelings/Emotions

7. Your Values

8. Your Ideals

9. "Peak Experiences"

10. Transcendental Qualities

Famous QuoteLove is a serious mental disease.

By Plato (BC 427-BC 347) Greek philosopher.

Wicked men obey from fear; good men, from love.

By Aristotle (384 BC-322 BC) Greek philosopher.

When we are in love we seem to ourselves quite different from what we were before.

By Blaise Pascal (1623-1662) French mathematician, physicist and philosopher.

There is no remedy for love than to love more. By Henry David Thoreau (1817-1862) American naturalist, poet

and philosopher.

Immature love says: ''I love you because I need you.'' Mature love says: ''I need you because I love you.''

By Erich Fromm (1900-1980) Psychoanalyst and social philosopher.

How teenagers and young adults think of love and deal with love?

Cultural studies

Love as instant noodles?

The survey by “Chinese Manufacturers' Association, the Youth Committee ”

Total respondents: 509

分手復原期37%

追求期44%

戀愛期43%

PAYING LESS THAN ONE MONTH!

The survey by “Chinese Manufacturers' Association, the Youth Committee ”

Total respondents: 509

80%

DATING FOR THREE OR MORE TIMES!

(A) Affected by the foreign culture(celebrities)

Young pop artists Destructive and unrealisticNot mature enoughAn example: “Teenage Dream” by Katy Perry

◦“Let’s go all the way tonight. No regrets, just love.”

JUST EMPHASIS ON FEELING RATHER THAN THINKING!

(B) Affected by the negative evaluation

Most of the survey only interviewed hundreds of objects, then it is not accuracy

They feel…◦ Marginalization◦ Discrimination◦ Labeling◦ Other people do not understand their real needs

So, they are caused to be…◦ self-fulfilling prophecy of psychology

(C) Feel lost in the society

Can not find their value and meaningThey really need is…

◦ Soulful connectedness◦ Trusted◦ The joy of love and be loved

BY THE PSYCHOLOGIST, LARRY CRABB

(D) Associated with instant shopping mode

Values:◦ Materialism ： instant pleasure, emphasis on feeling

rather than thinking and desires are endless◦ Getting worried as they cannot pursue the luxurious life

The possible reasons:◦ coming from wealthy families◦ singleton◦ feel abnormal pressure in daily life

Small conclusion: values of young people to be successful restructuring, we must start on an individual's lifestyle and consumption patterns.

Other factorsAutonomous individualismNarcissistic hedonismPositioningReligion

Psychology

Freud

When is love form?

Love preference is formed in very early life (The mouth and anal stage) in the relationship between the child and its parents.

Family will shape the personality, that designs the pattern of the erotic career.

How is love form?

At the mouth and anal stage (Birth to 3 years),the mother's caresses and services in caring awaken the child's sex responses.

In the boy, this called “Oedipus complex”.

For the girl, also, the mother is the first love object,

but by the “castration complex” and “penis-envy”, girls shifted the erotic impulse to the father.

Influence of the childThe child's sexual feeling is to be shifted from its

parents to others, there must be some connection between the new love and the old one.

Resemblance between loved parent and unrelated person.(e.g. metal traits, name, occupation..)

The resemblance may not be fully realized.The Child is more capable to love somebody if he

feels satisfactory during the mouth and anal period.

John Lee

The Primary styles Eros (intense physical and emotional attraction and

commitment) Ludus (game playing style)

Storge (emotional intimacy)

The Secondary styles

Mania (Eros combined to Ludus) Pragma (Ludus combined to Storage)

Agape (Eros combined to Storage)

Triangular Theory of LoveA theory of love developed by psychologist Robert

Sternberg. Intimacy – Which encompasses feelings of attachment,

closeness, connectedness, and bondedness.Passion – Which encompasses drives connected to both

limerence and sexual attraction.Commitment – Which encompasses, in the short term, the

decision to remain with another, and in the long term, the shared achievements and plans made with that other.

Triangular Theory of Love

Science of Love

The Science of Love

Three Stages of Falling in LoveStage 1: Lust

Stage 2: Attraction

Stage 3: Attachment

Stage 1: LustLust is driven by the sex hormones

testosterone and oestrogen. Testosterone is not confined only to men. It has also been shown to play a major role in the sex drive of women. These hormones as Helen Fisher says "get you out looking for anything".

Stage 2: AttractionIn the attraction stage, a group of neuro-

transmitters called 'monoamines' play an important role:

Dopamine - Also activated by cocaine and nicotine.

Norepinephrine - Otherwise known as adrenalin. Starts us sweating and gets the heart racing.

Serotonin - One of love's most important chemicals and one that may actually send us temporarily insane.

Stage 3: Attachment

Oxytocin - It helps cement the strong bond between mother and child. It is also released by both sexes during orgasm and it is thought that it promotes bonding when adults are intimate.

Vasopressin - Another important chemical in the long-term commitment stage. It is an important controller of the kidney and its role in long-term relationships was discovered when scientists looked at the prairie vole

ConclusionIs it suitable for the society now?Love has many aspect.No right , no wrong.Do the teenagers do the right

things towards love nowadays?Think by yourself, and lead you

having a personal growth.

References http://www.ehow.com/way_5241480_love-advice-te

enagers.html http://www.ehow.com/way_5241480_love-advice-te

enagers.html http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cIwj61rgqIY http://www.truth-light.org.hk/article/title/n1901 http://www.philosophyparadise.com/quotes

/socrates.html http://www.blissofpeace.com/socrates/ladd

er.html http://www.oldandsold.com/articles09/sexu

al-emotion-46.shtml http://www.books.com.tw/exep/prod/booksf

ile.php?item=0010499168